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J.R.R *Insert name*
Started by: The Inkeeper

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The Inkeeper
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location: With You

J.R.R *Insert name*

I thought this would be funny, to write out lines or scenes of lotr if they were written by sombody else, or directed by sombody else.

Im looking forward to the J.R.R Tarantino version eek!


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Old Post Oct 2nd, 2004 03:49 PM
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Naz
Super Senior Member

Gender: Female
Location:

J.R.R Rushing

The ringwraiths ran after Frodo. Then they killed him. Then Sam cryed. Then he ringwraiths killed Sam. All was good.

Old Post Oct 2nd, 2004 03:50 PM
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The Inkeeper
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location: With You

Screw it, i cant wait for tarantino

J.R.R Tarantino

Elrond: This Is Aragorn, when you absolutely have to take out every mother****er in the room, accept no other.

__________________________________________________
_

*gollum is captured, while being tortured an orc taunts him*

Orc: What does Sauron look like?
Gollum: whatssses?
Orc: Common tongue mother****er, what country you from
Gollum: What?
Orc: I aint heard of no country called what, do they speak english in what?
Gollum: What?
Orc: *puts sword to gollum* Say 'what' one more damn time, i dare you! now, what does Sauron look like?
Golum: Hes....metal
Orc: Does he look like a *****?
Gollum: What?
Orc: DOES HE LOOK LIKE A *****!?
Gollum: No!
Orc: Then why did you try to **** him like a *****?
Gollum: I didntss
Orc: yes you did gollum, yes you did

__________________________________________________


*sauron and gil galad battle*

Sauron: you ever read the ring inscription gil? well theres this...passage i got memorised,

One ring, to rule them all!
One Ring To Find Them!
One Ring to Bring Them All!
And In The Darkness....
Bind Them! *kills gil galad*


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Old Post Oct 2nd, 2004 04:05 PM
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The Rover

Gender: Male
Location: Canada

confused
Sig is classic....laughing


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Old Post Oct 3rd, 2004 02:52 PM
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roundisfunny
Senior Member

Gender: Unspecified
Location: United States

J.R.R. Seuss:

A hobbit named Frodo went through the land/
A magical ring upon his hand

What's this? A Gollum, all pasty and bent/
Who followed our hero wherever he went

To steal the precious and make it his own/
Was his foul intent, his heart was of stone

But Frodo's fat friend, a hobbit named Sam/
Who worked out too little, and ate too much ham

Protected his buddy from that crazy insane-o/
And helped him dispose of them both...in a volcano.


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Old Post Oct 6th, 2004 01:40 AM
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Laskharis
Not a Goatwife

Gender: Male
Location: Aussie-stralia

James R. R. Joyce

Riverrun the hobbits ringby plantony frostwhen erewhich.
-seek ye venterthrone calmbits?
-nonplurvy, arm the arm unwhat flestonis.
Brekekekekekek, coax, coax. The Fall, aaaaaaaarrrrrghasjhaiufafahefjb!


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Old Post Oct 6th, 2004 01:06 PM
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Fay Lupin
Daughter of dragons

Gender: Female
Location: Boulevard of broken dreams

J.R.R Rowling

*Orks torturing Gollum*

"Tell us where the ring is!"
"NO!"
"You asked for it... CRUCIO!"
*Gollum writhes in pain... That curse beats the thumbscrew! big grin *

*Battle where Boromir dies*

Random Uruk-hai: "Look, theres the Stewards son!"
Uruk that kills him in the movie: *Whips out wand* "AVADA KEDAVRA!"


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Old Post Oct 9th, 2004 07:01 PM
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Fay Lupin
Daughter of dragons

Gender: Female
Location: Boulevard of broken dreams

Another JRR Rowling:

Boromir: "Give me the ring!"
Frodo: "No!"
Boromir: "IMPERIO! Now give me the ring!"
*Frodo hands it over*

Old Post Oct 9th, 2004 07:38 PM
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Nazgul lord
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location: Australia

quote:
Originally posted by Merry Lover
Another JRR Rowling:

Boromir: "Give me the ring!"
Frodo: "No!"
Boromir: "IMPERIO! Now give me the ring!"
*Frodo hands it over*


LMAO thats classic


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Old Post Oct 25th, 2004 03:01 AM
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Nazgul lord
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location: Australia

JRR Peterson:

Boromirr: it will be mine, it should be mine give it to me!
Frodo: i have seen this moment in my dreams!
Boromirr:hwoarrr!
Frodo: puts on the ring!
*spears and sting flying around*
*boromirr falls to his knees*


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Old Post Oct 25th, 2004 10:52 PM
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«§hõnknêss»
Senior Member

Gender: Female
Location: IN MY BRAIN

These are hillarious laughing


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[SPOILER - highlight to read]: You see, when we left Jack, marooned on the ship with a cuffed wrist and a hungry kraken, we forgot one very important thing mate-he's Captain Jack Sparrow... savvy?

Old Post Oct 31st, 2004 06:00 AM
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drunk_nazgul
obscure

Gender: Female
Location: YOU ARE HERE

J.R.R. Pixar's The Lord of the Nemo


Merry & Pippin at Bilbo's party.

Merry: "Dude..."
Pippin: "Totally..."
*firecracker dragon explodes*
Both: "Radical!"


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Old Post Nov 8th, 2004 01:14 AM
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«§hõnknêss»
Senior Member

Gender: Female
Location: IN MY BRAIN

LOL laughing


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[SPOILER - highlight to read]: You see, when we left Jack, marooned on the ship with a cuffed wrist and a hungry kraken, we forgot one very important thing mate-he's Captain Jack Sparrow... savvy?

Old Post Nov 28th, 2004 10:14 AM
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Fionnoula
Restricted

Gender: Female
Location: United Kingdom

Account Restricted

I love the Dr S one, very funny laughing out loud


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Old Post Nov 30th, 2004 08:49 PM
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REXXXX
Networking

Gender: Male
Location: San Diego

Moderator

J.R.R. Ambrose (guy who wrote Band o' Brothers)

Sam: Frodo! *fires M1 Garand into a crowd of Nazi Orcs*
Frodo: Sam! I've got the Ring! *pulls pin out of a grenade and puts it on, then dashes across field as little bullets marked with white hands fly everywhere*
Sam: Here, Mr. Frodo, throw it in! *pulls Frodo over to a mortar*
Gollum: Nein! *jumps out sporting a red arm band and a Hitleresque mustache, firing Lugers* Mein vaunts mein precious, Juden Schwein!
Boromir: No, I want the Ring, comrade! *jumps in carrying a rifle and bashes Hitler-Gollum, wearing a brown uniform and carrying a shield with a sicke-and-hammer on it*
Frodo: Stay back! It's mine!
Orcs: AAAAAAAAAAARGH! *fires Machine Gun at the group*


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Old Post Dec 5th, 2004 08:57 PM
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REXXXX
Networking

Gender: Male
Location: San Diego

Moderator

J.R.R. Strangelove

*Gollum waves a ten gallon hat and the Ring around as he rides an atom bomb into Mount Doom*


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Old Post Dec 5th, 2004 08:58 PM
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Londonboy7
Dance DODODUDODODO

Gender: Male
Location: United States

J.R.R Moore

Frodo set out on his jorrney to free the land from the evil PResident bush who was the cousins roommates siter of sauron.


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Old Post Feb 13th, 2005 06:39 PM
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§P0oONY
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location: Northumberland, United Kingdom

J.R.R Bush

Boromir: Frodo give me the New-clear weapons (nuclear)

Frodo: we will not negotiate with terrorists,

Gollum: Hmmmm.. Precious oil


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...

Old Post Feb 25th, 2005 05:48 PM
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Shadowskill
The Mourning Sage

Gender: Female
Location: land of the faded

quote:
Originally posted by Spooony
J.R.R Bush

Boromir: Frodo give me the New-clear weapons (nuclear)

Frodo: we will not negotiate with terrorists,

Gollum: Hmmmm.. Precious oil


Isn't that the truth?


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Old Post Feb 26th, 2005 06:32 PM
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§P0oONY
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location: Northumberland, United Kingdom

yse, yes it is


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Old Post Feb 26th, 2005 06:53 PM
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