Love and hating someone at the same time.........what a paradox.
Yes, I believe I've experienced it, but I also don't believe it's truly love if you can hate them also............True loving would not expect anything from anyone else. That would be leachism (is that a word?)..........Real love would let a person go and be who they are. Real love would never try to change anyone else. Real love would put it's self second....imo
Hate or hatred is an emotion of intense revulsion, distaste, enmity, or antipathy for a person, thing, or phenomenon; a desire to avoid, restrict, remove, or destroy its object. "Hate" can also describe a state in which one strongly desires another living being to experience pain or negative affects, be they emotional or physical. The emotion is often stigmatized; yet it serves an important purpose, as does love. Just as love signals attachment, hatred signals detachment.
Love is a condition or phenomenon of emotional primacy, or absolute value. Love generally includes an emotion of intense attraction to either another person, a place, or thing; and may also include the aspect of caring for or finding identification with those objects, including self love. Love can describe an intense feeling of affection, an emotion or an emotional state. In ordinary use, it usually refers to interpersonal love, an experience usually felt by a person for another person. Love is commonly considered impossible to define.
However Love-Hate relationships do exsist though...
Love-Hate relationship is a personal relationship between humans or organizations, or figuratively between a human and an inanimate object, like a computer, a field of study, a body of ideas, or a profession, involving simultaneous or alternating emotions of love and enmity. This relationship may or may not be of a romantic nature.
The term comes from the way one may love the object or person one moment, and yet the next moment feel great rage or hatred for it. For example, a computer may impress a user with amazing video game graphics one moment, only to give rise to anger when it crashes during the game. As a colloquial expression, if someone says "I have a love-hate relationship with legal studies", what the person is trying to express is a marked ambivalence about his or her study of the law; parts of it are attractive, while other aspects are personally repellent.
(On a side note...Wikipedia, I love you 🙂 )
Originally posted by AOR
Just as love signals attachment, hatred signals detachment.
I disagree.
It might be better to describe love as a positive attachment, hate as a negative attachment, being that when you truly hate someone/thing, you are still investing a lot of emotional energy in that relationship.
Apathy, I would say, signals detachment.
And yes, definitions aside for the moment, IMO, it is possible to love and hate simultaneously.
I hate women for making me fall in love with them. I hate being in love but I can't do without it somehow. I was psychotic once through mind expanding drugs and was completely without love for anybody and I didn't like it.. oops, and that while I always thought I didn't need anybody, what a revelation.
Wow.
Anyway.. I'm never truely disgusted by anybody either actually. Maybe I don't know true hate. I love all attention, even negative. All the revenge I take (yes, I have a terrorist mentality) are just because I can.
Can anybody help me? Are there people around here who are such simple souls that they have actually experienced true hatred?
😱
I don't think you can choose whether or not you love someone or something, it cant be turned off or on, it just is.... but I think you can choose whether or not to 'hate'.
I think what is meant by 'hate' in this instance is a reaction to a sensation of frustration or rage....and we have a choice in how or whether or not we react to that sensation in a negative or positive way.
Everyone gets frustrated or mad from time to time, how you react to those sensations is up to you.
Therefore I think it is possible to have a love/hate relationship, and in most cases it is probably normal and healthy.
eh, well.. love is a very sketch thing.
Perhaps you mean 'selfish love.'
Selfish love is when you love what someone or something contributes to your life.. this is by far the most prevalent form of love.... It has a lot to do with feelings of possession over another and jealousy.... all the way to attachment to material possessions and so forth and so on. For example, a person that you selfishly love is someone that you want to do things for because when you do, it helps them, but it also makes you feel good about yourself. Not because you just want them to be happy, but because it also makes you happy.
This isn't a bad form of love, its just the way it is in the majority of relationships.... and of course it can be abused like anything else.
So if you "turned off" your selfish love, then you turned off your desire to love yourself through other people and things...I don't know how you think you did that but ...ok...
One could argue that choosing to do just about anything is a form of selfish love, such as using a computer...
Perhaps selfish love has more to do with the brain while true love comes from the 'heart?'.... if thats the case then most relationships probably have a bit of both, the majority going towards one way or the other depending on the relationship.
Hey, maybe you just shut off your 'heart' well...whatever that means..
Hatred however is most definitely affected by the way we choose to THINK about reality.
In theory a true love, if there is such a thing, would be directly in-twined with compassion. Wanting only what is best for them with no regard for yourself.
Very rare, if it even exists at all.
Love is a unifier, while Hate is more of a disunifier.
But it's a lot more confusing and complicated than that. When a person is obsessed with another person what is the motivation? Love for the other person, or hate for oneself?
Personally, I feel that Love and Hate are polar opposites. Do I beleive in a middleground somewhere? ofcourse, but I don't think you can truly hate someone if you Love them, the same way you cannot truly love someone if you hate them. Anger/jealousy is not true hatred, and lust/attraction/infatuation is not true Love.
If you truly love someone unconditionally then you can forgive them for anything and love them for thier entirety. You see thier "flaws" are part of who they are, and therefore lack judgement. If you love someone unselfishly you put thier needs first and thier happiness first. I mean, yes, you do have to love yourself before you can love anyone else, but when you do love someone else, you are more concerned with thier well being than your own.
To truly Hate someone you have to take pleasure in seeing them suffer on a continual basis. You have to be able to hurt them without feeling sorrow or regret. Thier needs and happiness have to be the LAST thing on your mind, if not even there at all. You cannot love someone that you take pleasure in seeing harmed.
Point being.....True Love and True Hate are such extremes that they cannot exist together in regard to the same person.
I believe Hate is the abscence of Love. This because Love and Hate are based on the premise of duality, you can not have one without the other. Therefore you can not love and hate someone at the same time. You may like some things about them, and dislike the other parts, but never love and hate them...
Originally posted by AOR
I believe Hate is the abscence of Love. This because Love and Hate are based on the premise of duality, you can not have one without the other. Therefore you can not love and hate someone at the same time. You may like some things about them, and dislike the other parts, but never love and hate them...
Wait wait. So I don't know some kid in Asia, therefore a don't love him, so in my absence of love, I hate him?
Pretty bleak, hating 99.9% of the world's population.
Love and Hate are the same EMOTION made up of both negative charges as well as positive charges. Initially it is in a NEUTRAL STATUS: The negative charges and positive ones are in perfect equilibrium.
The UNKNOWN to our thoughts does not affect this equilibrium. But the KNOWN to our thoughts does! When you start thinking about Someone or something. And you perceive something about them as good, some of negative charges are converted to positive ones. And if you perceive it as bad then some of the positive charges are converted to negative ones.
If the change in charges throws the equilibrium just slightly one way or another, then you are in the state of " I have the feeling". if the equilibrium is more displaced than that, then you are in the state of " I like or I dislike" if the equilibrium displacement is substantial then you are heading towards the "I love or I hate" state.
Love and Hate are respectively represented by the positive and negative charges in that emotion. And the equilibrium between the two is only affected by our perception of things including humans. In order for one of them to grow stronger it has to take charges away from the other one, at the same time rendering it weaker. Therefore you can practically only hate someone or something with the same intensity that you love them in the perfect equilibrium state. Which means that you have absolutely no perceptions in their regard. and the UNKNOWN is the the only prefect candidate for that.
"I only believe half of what I think"(TheSpinner)