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I am only a Man
Started by: mud_blood_princ

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mud_blood_princ
Senior Member

Gender: Unspecified
Location: Pit of darkness

I am only a Man

I am only a Man

I am only one man
you tell me I can change the world
but right now Im still in high school
I try hard every day but slowly I am dieing
You baby me but I am no child
How can you baby me when I've seen what I've seen
I've seen more pain then i thought I could take
Yet you still see me as a child
NO!! I am no child, I've seen more than you!
My "friends" dont know me they think Im a joke
My old friends just drink and smoke
but I will NOT follow their path of death, not any more
I am done with them done with everyone of you f@cking liars
the ones who put on a mask when I am just taking mine off
I've needed you before to help me when I have struggled
But you steal me mind with your hypnotizing drugs
You lied to me when you said if I took it I'd be cool
So after all this You still view me as a child?
Why? more of my friends have dropped out instead of studying
I try to help myself, so one day I could dig you out of your hole youve dug into the ground ,father than I can help, but I am a Man
Where I live their is not "heaven" I am not ment to go
I am one of the ones who kill for you every day
Just so you can grow fat and die
my great grandfather dropped on d-day, I should have dropped then
but now i am going to die here
I want to save you, even the world, but then agian " I am only a Man"


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Old Post Feb 4th, 2006 03:15 AM
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mud_blood_princ
Senior Member

Gender: Unspecified
Location: Pit of darkness

tell me what you think


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Old Post Feb 4th, 2006 03:33 AM
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bogen
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Gender: Male
Location: purgatory

my advise: stop whining, it sounds so " im a big kid now" but all in all i think it's a good example of misplace talent, try something a bit more grown up next time, huh?


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Old Post Feb 11th, 2006 01:03 PM
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mud_blood_princ
Senior Member

Gender: Unspecified
Location: Pit of darkness

well your ovisly a girl and probly a flat one at that


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Old Post Feb 13th, 2006 08:37 PM
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el_barto
I'm So Bored With the USA

Gender: Male
Location: Time and Space

You can't ask people what they think then when they give you their opinions you insult them, that's kind of stupid.


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Old Post Feb 24th, 2006 11:48 PM
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mud_blood_princ
Senior Member

Gender: Unspecified
Location: Pit of darkness

well if you were where i am right now than you would diss everyone possible, right now heavens not an option


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Old Post Feb 27th, 2006 11:56 PM
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Eternal Turmoil
owned.

Gender: Male
Location: look up. :)

quote: (post)
Originally posted by mud_blood_princ
well your ovisly a girl and probly a flat one at that


That was totally inappropriate.

Old Post Mar 2nd, 2006 07:37 PM
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mud_blood_princ
Senior Member

Gender: Unspecified
Location: Pit of darkness

and neither is your face


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Old Post Mar 10th, 2006 11:12 PM
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Coldfire
<3 <3 <3

Gender: Female
Location: Vancouver, Canada

Hey! Please don't sit here and be rude to people on here mbp! You asked for an opinion, and you got one. I'm sorry if they weren't the ones you were hoping for, but life's not always fair. So please try and learn to be civil.


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Old Post Mar 11th, 2006 04:28 AM
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The Infekted
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Gender: Male
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Well I don't know what u all think but I liked it!!
Keep it up. Its good Im being HONEST!

Old Post Mar 29th, 2007 05:52 AM
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pcp
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Location:

Your poem is shit.

Old Post Mar 30th, 2007 11:59 AM
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chillmeistergen
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Gender: Male
Location: United Kingdom

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This is not poetry, I think you need to learn a lot about the use of stanza structure the use of language etc. I advise to read some of the Romantic poets such as Blake and Byron as you obviously have no idea how to write poetry. There is no rhyme, no rhythm and absolutely no structure. Plus, try to stop complaining, at least not directly; poets convey emotion through use of similes, metaphors and imagery, you have absolutely no concept of this. Also this seems like a very rushed piece of work, poets can spend years on one poem. If it's just to complain you want to do try writing a blog, or, something that doesn't require any artistic qualities.


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Old Post Mar 30th, 2007 12:08 PM
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pcp
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Gender: Unspecified
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It sounds like a song rather than a poem.

Old Post Mar 30th, 2007 12:09 PM
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