daeri
Senior Member
Gender: Female Location: Netherlands
James & Devon.. (Sons of Harry and Draco)
I don't really got a title..
Plot:
It's like 20 year later since book 6. Harry has a son, James, who's 16. Draco also has a son, Devon, also 16. James is in love with Devon, and Devon doesn't know he's in love too :')
Rating: I have no ****ing clue, but it's boy on boy, so I think R?
Chapter 1 - "I love you"
Chapter 2
Jul 20th, 2005 11:17 AM
Phoenix
Luna Lovegood
Gender: Female Location: in a double decker bus...
I think its really good! My only constructive criticism is that its going a bit swiftly, its a bit confusing. Maybe slow it down a little, cut big sentences into shorter sentences, have some internal monologues going on...
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Jul 20th, 2005 03:03 PM
daeri
Senior Member
Gender: Female Location: Netherlands
Thanks Phoe.. finally some criticism .. I already noticed that I have too little talking going on.. I'll try to change that in the next chapter.. but I'll go to Berlin first, get some new ideas and stuff, because I really do not have a clue how to go on after what Devon said.. is he going to be a daddy or not? I don't know.. depends on Felicia.
Jul 20th, 2005 03:06 PM
DarkC
-KMC THREAD KILLER-
Gender: Male Location: Cacapoopoopeepeeshire.
Hey, why not just copy and paste onto here?
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Jul 20th, 2005 04:45 PM
daeri
Senior Member
Gender: Female Location: Netherlands
quote: (post ) Originally posted by DarkCanadian
Hey, why not just copy and paste onto here?
This looks better
Jul 20th, 2005 04:51 PM
daeri
Senior Member
Gender: Female Location: Netherlands
No one else wants to read it?
Jul 21st, 2005 05:23 AM
DarkDethbringer
Kakow how you like me now
Gender: Male Location: I cant come up with anything clever
I can't please put it on this site....
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well for now at least,
I'm unsure if i will stay for too long
Jul 21st, 2005 05:38 AM
DarkDethbringer
Kakow how you like me now
Gender: Male Location: I cant come up with anything clever
oh I read it and who is pregnant?
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Alas I have Returned
well for now at least,
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Jul 21st, 2005 05:52 AM
misslilsweetie
I'm confoosed
Gender: Female Location: try to find me
its great! even though i was bit disgusted about james being Gay
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I'm a sweetie..don't change it by making me be angry
Jul 21st, 2005 05:16 PM
sniper135
Junior Member
Gender: Location: Australia
its abit disturbing but yeah it quite good
Jul 23rd, 2005 12:18 AM
misslilsweetie
I'm confoosed
Gender: Female Location: try to find me
when are u gonna post more
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I'm a sweetie..don't change it by making me be angry
Jul 23rd, 2005 03:16 PM
DarkDethbringer
Kakow how you like me now
Gender: Male Location: I cant come up with anything clever
took the words out of my mouth............
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Alas I have Returned
well for now at least,
I'm unsure if i will stay for too long
Jul 25th, 2005 01:50 AM
DarkDethbringer
Kakow how you like me now
Gender: Male Location: I cant come up with anything clever
OH FELECIA!! I did nto know who was preganant........damn starting off early.
__________________
Alas I have Returned
well for now at least,
I'm unsure if i will stay for too long
Jul 25th, 2005 01:59 AM
daeri
Senior Member
Gender: Female Location: Netherlands
quote: (post ) Originally posted by misslilsweetie
its great! even though i was bit disgusted about james being Gay
Did you read it well? he isn't gay, he's bisexual..
Jul 25th, 2005 10:56 PM
daeri
Senior Member
Gender: Female Location: Netherlands
quote: (post ) Originally posted by DarkDethbringer
OH FELECIA!! I did nto know who was preganant........damn starting off early.
Yeah Felicia
Jul 25th, 2005 11:33 PM
daeri
Senior Member
Gender: Female Location: Netherlands
quote: (post ) Originally posted by misslilsweetie
when are u gonna post more
I'll try to post more this week .. still don't know how to go on..
Jul 26th, 2005 12:20 AM
daeri
Senior Member
Gender: Female Location: Netherlands
Ok, chapter 3 is done now!
Chapter 3 - Not ready
Oh, it's rated M, because there is a little bit detailed stuff in it..
Last edited by daeri on Jul 26th, 2005 at 10:53 PM
Jul 26th, 2005 10:49 PM
DarkDethbringer
Kakow how you like me now
Gender: Male Location: I cant come up with anything clever
DAYMN!dude alittle graphic there....
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Alas I have Returned
well for now at least,
I'm unsure if i will stay for too long
Jul 26th, 2005 11:51 PM
daeri
Senior Member
Gender: Female Location: Netherlands
I'm a girl.. and if you don't like it, just don't read
Jul 27th, 2005 09:26 AM
DarkDethbringer
Kakow how you like me now
Gender: Male Location: I cant come up with anything clever
I didn't say I didn't like it dude I just said it was a little well.....(and i call everyone dude)
__________________
Alas I have Returned
well for now at least,
I'm unsure if i will stay for too long
Jul 27th, 2005 11:15 AM
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