A Different Kind Of Hero
AUTHOR’S NOTES: This IS a Harry Potter fanfic, although you don’t see a canon character for a few pages. The introductory chapter was largely (VERY largely) inspired by the prologue of Undead and Unemployed by Mary Janice Davidson, an awesome book I recommend to all vampire lovers.
CHAPTER ONE: Prologue
The wreck was baffling. The car in question had crashed into a telephone booth at a very slow speed beside an old alley. A large object hit it from above, collapsing the top of the car. Moments later, the car sustained a heavy blow on the side that forced the compact to roll. The source of these damages could not be located, though the driver claims she crashed into the booth while yawning.
The driver, a sixty-two-year-old Caucasian nurse by the name of Mary Sue McDonald, was found waiting beside the demolished vehicle with minor injuries. McDonald denied the offer of hospital care and consented to be taken to the precinct for an interview. The interview was conducted by detective Conner Wilcox.
The driver was proven to be free of drugs and other mind-impairing substances prior to the interview.
“Okay, the tape recorder’s going.” Wilcox tapped the black case and set it on the table, surveying the woman sitting at the other end of the table. Her hair was blond with a bit of gray and bound in a tight bun. She wore revolting purple pants under a crisp pink shirt with purple flowers, her nurse outfit that she had been wearing during the time of the wreck. There were several bloodstains on her legs, but the woman still went on strong. Her lips were pulled tight as she glared silently at Wilcox behind bifocal glasses. “Before we get started, would you like a drink? Tea or coffee?”
Mrs. McDonald narrowed her owlish eyes at the young yet balding man in front of her, who was dressed in a clean gray suit. “No thank you, Detective, I gave up caffeine years ago.”
“But you’ve had such a rough evening,” Wilcox pressed. His voice was rather grunt-like, matching his large and stubble-ridden chin. “Are you sure you don’t want something to calm your nerves? We do have decaf.” Mary Sue McDonald scowled deeply and wrinkled a twitchy nose at him.
“When I say no, I mean ‘no’ and you’d best listen the first time!” Wilcox’s eyes darkened for a moment, but the stubborn woman was only given a tense smile in response.
“Alright, no drinks then.” The man’s beady eyes took a swift glance at tape recorder. “Now, if you’d kindly retell the events of this evening?”
The woman gave a barking laugh, leaning towards the detective with a mad glint in her eyes. “Well, I did hear they’re having one hell of a storm off in India,” she whispered conspiratorially. “And I had a mighty interesting night at work. There was this fellow in emergency care who’d swallowed a dozen metal nail files; what he was thinking, I’ll never know.”
Wilcox’s beefy fingers clenched into fists. He knew he’d been challenged, but he dared not bother the woman who’d come on her own volition. “Mrs. McDonald, I meant the events that led you into this room.” This only delighted the woman more; she clapped twice and leaned back in her cheap metal chair with a great wicked grin.
“That’s more like it; specifics!” she chuckled. “I won’t answer to a man who can’t even ask the right question.”
“Mrs. McDonald,” Wilcox hissed. “The events. Please.”
“Don’t rush me!” the woman snapped.
I always work really late evenings, you see, since I’m a nurse. This was a particularly late night. That man, the one who’d gone and swallowed a dozen nail files? He kept us busy until about eleven. I normally go to bed at ten, you see; so, when I got ready to get set to go home, I was dead on my feet with exhaustion. There was a rather long light near 7th street where I nearly fell asleep at the wheel… It was about two blocks later that I crashed into the phone booth.
“What made you crash into the phone booth?” Wilcox interrupted, stroking his thick, whiskery chin with his large hands.
“I’m getting there, you impudent old prune! Do you think rushing me is going to do you any good?” Mrs. McDonald admonished, swelling menacingly within her flowery purple nurse uniform, gray eyes flashing. “Whoever thought you were fit to do these interrogations- sorry, interviews- must have been having delusions about your adequacy!” A muscle jumped in Wilcox’s stubble-ridden cheek. The woman smirked and leaned back in her seat, diminishing again to a regular old lady.
“Questionings,” Wilcox rumbled. Mrs. McDonald’s face fell slightly.
“Excuse me?”
“Questionings,” Wilcox repeated. “Not interviews. Not interrogations. Questionings.” Mrs. McDonald bit her tongue and glared at the man. His lips twitched into a smile; he’d taken control of the conversation. “Please continue.”
“Alright,” McDonald grunted.
I crashed because I yawned, simple enough. I yawned at the wrong time. I took my hands off the wheel on accident. My car hasn’t had an alignment in years. It swerved straight into that damn booth.
McDonald fell silent.
“That must have been terrifying,” Wilcox said stiffly, more for the purpose of encouraging her to go on then to actually comfort her. McDonald glowered at the man without any pretence of liking.
“Of course it was. How could it not be? I got knocked face first into my steering wheel!” Wilcox sank into his chair, his face bearing the expression of a man slapped by his wife. “And that little car was cramped enough before it smashed in on itself. I had to cut the damn airbag open with a knife just to make it stop suffocating me. Yes, it was terrifying!”
She fell silent once more, smoothing her purple pants and allowing Wilcox enough calm to sit upright. A blond hair fell out of her bun and into her face, but she did nothing to remove it. Conner Wilcox leaned forward, watching the nurse’s face. “I was under the impression that the initial collision only damaged your car’s bonnet,” the detective pondered suspiciously. “What hit you from above and how did your vehicle end up on its side?”
McDonald’s eyes brightened and she mimed a clap of glee. An opening had been spotted. “If you would shut your yapper and let me decide on the best way to put it, you might actually hear those answers before Christmas!” she laughed wickedly. Wilcox ground his yellowed teeth and said nothing. A few seconds passed where the sound of the tape recorder seemed loud enough to overcome internal monologue. “There’s a good lad.” To Wilcox’s immense relief (as well as surprise), Mary Sue continued her tale.
I was mighty shocked when I crashed into that horribly placed phone booth. I was also mighty tired, and as soon as I got the airbag out of my face I wanted to say, “To hell with reporting this!” and go to sleep there and then. I did just that.
“You went to sleep inside your car while it was still grinding into the phone booth? Do you take any sleep medications?” Conner asked quickly.
“Do I look like a tweaker?” McDonald sniped. “I had a bad day, and I was tired, so I went to sleep! I didn’t flee the crime scene or anything!” Wilcox subsided, but Mary Sue McDonald was still glowering at his balding head through her bifocals.
To the detective’s immense annoyance, she stopped talking once more. Not wanting to push things, Wilcox stared at the spinning tape recorder, tapping his beefy fingers on the crisp gray desk. The woman still stared at him with annoyance. “Would you like something to drink?” the man eventually asked again, his voice level.
The woman’s thin lips twitched into a smile. “Why yes, I would like some lemon soda and whiskey,” she requested waspishly. Wilcox proceeded to bite his lip and snarl quietly, shoulder shaking slightly with masked restraint.
“Madame,” he bit out, “You came here to report some suspicious behavior and a car accident. Even considering your tale so far, I’ve began to… suspect that allowing you into this building was an accident. Do not waste my time. I want to go to bed tonight just as much as you do.” The blond sobered.
“I’ve just been having an internal struggle,” the woman stated. “I’m not certain I should tell you anything at all. I was threatened, you see, and if I keep my mouth shut I might never see the consequences.” Wilcox’s shoulders froze in place, though his face went slack and his fists unclenched.
“Threatened? By a telephone booth?” Wilcox asked incredulously. McDonald’s rosy cheeks puffed.
“No, you dunce! By the wizard-vampires!”
Neither moved in the long silence that followed.
“Wizard-vampires,” Conner numbly repeated, eying the woman as if she’d gone mad.
“Wizard-vampires,” Mary Sue reassured him. “I’m not on drugs, and I’m not nutters. They’re the ones doing the suspicious behavior, they’re the ones who threatened me, and they’re the reason my car is still upside down with a boulder-sized dent on the top.”
“Are you really…?” Conner laughed, trailing off, shaking his head, completely dumbfounded.
“Serious? Yes! And I would explain, if you’d stop interrupting!” Mrs. McDonald fumed. “I’ve already said enough to put me in the asylum, so I might as well finish the bloody story, if only just to make you stop asking!” Still shaking his head and staring at the woman, Conner Wilcox nodded and allowed her to continue.
I woke up at about four in the morning- a bit surprising, considering the traffic and how unlikely it is that nobody would pull over to see the wreck. Before you ask- don’t look at me like that! I knew it was four because I have a watch. I was still miffed and annoyed, but I figured I’d dilly-dallied enough. I was going to get out of the car and find a working phone, but then I saw… them.