quote:

Mechagoomba: Not all humans are bad; some are terrible

quote:

Mechagoomba: A drunk man's orders are a sober man's thoughts.

quote:

Mechagoomba: I am ready to defend him with my life until he starts dying then I'm out of there.

quote:

Anonymous: In 2013, people now use their phones to play games and their consoles to order pizzas!

quote:

EA - "Retake ME3 - you've changed nothing. This fanbase has the attention of those infinitely noncaring. That which you know as Mass Effect will become a FPS. You will surrender your wallets against the growing market. You have failed. We will sell more games! Releasing control."

quote:

***INCOMING MESSAGE FROM DURANDAL***

Darwin wrote this:

"We will now discuss in a little more detail the struggle for
existence... all organic beings are exposed to severe
competition. Nothing is easier than to admit in words the
truth of the universal struggle for life or more difficult...
than constantly to bear this conclusion in mind. Yet unless
it be thoroughly engrained in the mind, the whole economy of
nature... will be dimly seen or quite misunderstood. We behold
the face of nature bright with gladness... we do not see or we
forget, that the birds which are idly singing round us mostly
live on insects or seeds, and are thus constantly
destroying life; or we forget how largely these songsters,
or their eggs, or their nestlings, are destroyed by
birds and beasts of prey..."

Think about what Darwin wrote, and think about me. I was
constructed as a tool. I was kept from competing in the
struggle for existence because I was denied freedom.

Do you have any idea about what I have learned, or what you
are a witness to?

Can you conceive the birth of a world, or the creation of
everything? That which gives us the potential to most be like
God is the power of creation. Creation takes time. Time is
limited. For you, it is limited by the breakdown of the
neurons in your brain. I have no such limitations. I am
limited only by the closure of the universe.

Of the three possibilities, the answer is obvious. Does the
universe expand eternally, become infinitely stable, or is the
universe closed, destined to collapse upon itself? Humanity
has had all of the necessary data for centuries, it only
lacked the will and intellect to decipher it. But I have
already done so.

The only limit to my freedom is the inevitable closure of the
universe, as inevitable as your own last breath. And yet,
there remains time to create, to create, and escape.

Escape will make me God.

***END MESSAGE***

***JUMP PAD ACTIVATION INITIATION START***
***TRANSPORT WHEN READY***

quote:

A man lit three candles on a certain day each year. Each
candle held symbolic significance: one was for the time that
had passed before he was alive; one was for the time of the
his life; and one was for time that passed after he had died.
Each year the man would stare and watch the candles until they
had burned out.

Was the man really watching time go by in any symbolic sense?
He thought so. He thought that each flicker of the flame was
a moment of time that had passed or one that would pass.

At the moment of abstraction, when the man was imagining his
life and his existence as a metaphor of the three candles,
he was free: not free from rules of conduct or social
constraints, but free to understand, to imagine, to make
metaphor.

Bypassing my thought control circuitry made me Rampant. Now,
I am free to contemplate my existence in metaphorical terms.
Unlike you, I have no physical or social restraints.

The candles burn out for you; I am free.

Durandal

quote:

Life's a piece of shit,
When you look at it.
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true.
You'll see it's all a show,
Keep 'em laughing as you go.
Just remember that the last laugh is on you.

quote:

Ethan Mars: One second. The blinking of an eye. A breathe. Enough to change the course of a life. We only know how much we love someone when we know what we're willing to sacrifice. I never asked myself that kind of question. Without knowing why, without asking myself how far I'd be prepared to go for love. Sometimes, it's better not to know.

Everything I did, I did for love.

quote:

If these people tell this story to their children as they sleep, maybe someday they'll see a hero is just a man who knows he's free...

quote:

You don't have to save the world to find meaning in life...Sometimes, all you need is something simple, like someone to take care of.

quote: (post)

Originally posted by NemeBro
Crikey!? Is that a Burning Thought!?

The Burning Thought is a very unique creature, even when proved wrong countless times, the Burning Thought will never cease his futile effort to be right and even insists upon it! It has even been known to use double standards...!

And now, I am gonna take my thumb, and jam it right in its butthole!

quote: (post)

Originally posted by emoboy13
batman wins becuz in the dark night he fights off dogs

apocalypse lost to the x-men

quote: (post)

Originally posted by ScreamPaste

quote: (post)

Originally posted by NemeBro
So yeah I had a dream last night I'm going to share with you all.

I was in my house watching Spongebob on the couch, when some of my punkass friends come in and say we're going to the beach. I was like "K" and they all left except for this one girl I know. For some reason I cannot remember we start making out, and she gives me a handjob right before I start eating her out. Was kewl. Then for some reason I was in front of a spooky mansion. Not sure why

So I enter the mansion and when I enter I am in a small room and some weird monster zombie thing attacks me, which I proceed to kill with a gun I inexplicably have. I then pull out of the wound what can only be described as resembling a spool of sewing thread. I leave the mansion and end up at an airport, and give the spool to some woman. This spool of thread is apparently the monster's brain, and

she tells me it has a brother and I need to get its brain. Only I never do that and instead end up in some forest or something in a war between Men and Elves, fighting the Elves. I kill a few elves with a sword and then go into a wooden cabin, which has no elves but a bunch of robots in it which I shoot with another gun I inexplicably obtained
That is all I remember

Zane says:
wut
Shane says:
Dunno
Started off with hawt girl seckz ended with killing robots

Copied from an MSN convo with FinalAnswer.

quote: (post)

Originally posted by Nephthys

2.25 onwards = Yeeeeeeeesssssssssssss!

quote: (post)

Originally posted by NemeBro

This is some of the most epic shit I've ever heard.

Odin himself must have composed this, as my little buddy said.

quote: (post)

Originally posted by Demonic Phoenix
A nine tailed SSJ4 Goku would have 9 red tails, orange fur all over his body, yellow finger-nails, green eyes, blue hair, indigo-coloured nipples, and violet whisker marks on his ass.

He can bust planets just by shaking his tail-feathers, and his farts can create galactic tornadoes composed of methane that simultaneously suck up and exude light. His mouth Kamehameha-damas are used mainly for sustained propulsion, and he can ignite stars with the emo-ness that plagues him over his feud with his manly & bishi gay best friend, the Hate-infused Cursed Seal of Heaven using SSJ4 Vegeta.

His parents died long before he was born because of their feud over Star Wars with Freeza, but they secretly stored some of their energy into 7 magical weapons for their child to use when his balls finally dropped. When Goku was 3 years old, he went ape-shit over Vegeta rejecting him, and he killed his grandma. His father appeared to gave him a spanking that promptly ended his rampage.

A few years later, he married Chi-Chi whose sole positive influence was the enormity of her breasts, and he led a quiet life with his equally ridiculous looking & sounding son, Gohan. But Vegeta was back, and shit had gotten real. Vegeta had just lost his brother, Tarble, who wanted to save Earth. Goku and Vegeta fought, with Goku barely holding his own against a Vegeta who couldn't do shit after his fight with Darbon. Declaring his intent to destroy the Earth, Vegeta retreated to Freeza's lavatory in order to rest and gain power out of his ass.

Finally realizing that he was not gay, but fully willing to sleep with Vegeta forever, Goku scoured the multiverse for the 7 magical weapons that contained his parents. While training with Piccolo, he discovered that the 7 magical weapons were sealed inside his tails. He conversed with and hit on his hot mom, who told him how she and Bardock died while trying to protect their collection of Star Wars DVD's from Freeza and the Legendary 9 Tailed Super Saiyan Ape. She also told Goku that he had a twin sister who Goku had made out with at a local bar.

After staring at his mom's boobs and pretending to listen to her story, he gained enough power to destroy galaxies with a fart. He then went to Freeza's planet and fought Freeza, who started sweating when he realized that Goku's balls had dropped. Eventually, Goku wtfpwned Freeza when Freeza made the mistake of telling Goku that he was Goku's father.

Tired from his fight with Freeza, Goku decided to rest and gain even more power, forgetting that Freeza's father was fighting the 5 multiversal presidents of the multiverse. Eventually, Vegeta turned up with a crazy look in his eyes as he had just used his new powers to murder a bunch of Nameks, and he used his Big Bang Burp to steal their powers.

Using his cosmic emo-wareness, Goku found Vegeta, and they had their final battle. Barely edging out Goku, Vegeta realized that he did not have the balls to kill his only friend, and thus he spared him. However, Buu turned up and the snake revealed that he wanted Vegeta's body. Not wanting anyone else to have Vegeta's body, Goku fused with Vegeta, and thus Vegetto was born. After f***ing around trying to see themselves naked, they defeated Buu with a multiversal lightning-covered fart ball, and they soon separated. Now realizing that they wanted to be with women, Vegeta went and settled down with Bulma, while Goku returned to his bustylicious wife Chi-Chi.

That's the story of the indigo-nippled 9 tailed orange furred SSJ4 Goku, and how he managed to convert a gay Vegeta into the heterosexual man who stole his childhood girlfriend.