KMC Forums - View Profile

Originally posted by Yamcha
I'm pretty certain I'm the worst hero Hyrule has ever had.

Here's my story.

I attempted The Tower of Hera and got to the 4th floor, battered and broken I ran around the 1st through 4th floors, looking all over when everything seemed to just lead into one giant circle..I figured I had to be close to the top and clicked to the next floor on the map..To my surprise it contained 13 floors...I wasn't even half way in...my spirits plummeted..

As I rode the platform around on the 4th floor probably my 7th time...the edge started to look so...nice...just a few steps closer I figured...by this time I was sloppy, the birds even were getting their licks in as they darted across slashing my face while I wildly swung the heavy hammer to and fro like a mad man doing his last bloody dance, no longer deserving to swing the Captain's Sword cause I was no longer a hero but a broken man...

Finally their tiny bodies crumpled under the weight of the weapon...all out of milk, leaning over the edge... I finally rang the bell, the dungeon had conquered me...but what's this...I ring...and ring....an even ring some more...and no one shows....I then force myself with my last bit of energy to make my way out, smashing the laughing tiles multiple times at the entry way for their laughs are as if the dungeon itself is mocking me...I ring the bell, the witch arrives then spouts some nonsense how she has a life too, but I don't pay her any mind, I catch wind that she's okay with it though cause she sees I'm beat up. I fly back to town, weathered, weary and broken I slowly make my way to the milk bar...I cleave the sign in half as I arrive, my failure fresh on my mind..I walk in and approach the bar, the bartender rambles about the castle, I dont care..I quickly fork over 20 rupees and guzzle the milk down...it heals the hearts but does little to ease the mind..I grab another and pound it down, I ask for one more as I slowly make my way to the Bard, he says he'll play some music with my milk so I toss him a couple rupees..anything to get away for even a second..I start to drink my other milk when suddenly I'm pulled back to reality..They're playing the fairy song... they were mocking me due to my failure..they watched me drag my bloody an busted heap of a green tunic self on the verge of being a corpse through those doors...I pull out my sword and point it towards them...they don't know the first damn thing about being a hero..

Not.one.damn.thing...

I slowly backpedal, sword extended pointing at them as they play..Then finally release...blade swinging and cleaving through the air inches from the young flute boys face...

I drink another glass of milk and buy one for the road..I overhear the soldiers say they left the castle to fight another day...I understand...they're not cowards...merely men with rational fears of what they don't understand..

By this point I could basically hear the Old Snake MGS4 theme playing, I imagined Link, stubble all across his worn face..."Hyrule has changed.." He'd mutter under his breath...

I then left the bar and beat the shit out of cucco and threw it down a well...Feeling rejuvenated I was ready to start this hero thing once more.