I think I have it pretty damn bad, I have the normal stuff, but also the really awful stuff, like when you think something and then you get upset about it.
Basically, it can get so bad that it can cause you to think about stuff you'd never do.
There was a time I thought I was a pedo, but it turned out to be my OCD.
It can cause you to believe a host of things, can convince yourself that you're unhappy when you have nothing to be unhappy about, can convince you that you don't love your loved ones.
It causes you to obsess over stuff that people would just shrug at.
Like, something small for one thing would be you obsessing for months.
Your mind convinces you that you are all these things when you're really just fine.
It can make you very depressed and convinced that you're this horrible human being who has unnatural thoughts, but they aren't your thoughts and you don't enjoy them, which makes you... not that specific thing you thought you were.
It gets better, and once you realize what OCD really is, you can figure out ways to combat it.
It can even get so bad that you're convinced you're attracted to family members when you aren't, and cause you to constantly obsess over small mistakes you've made in your past.
Just don't give up on yourself, and don't believe that what you think sometimes, is what you are, because its not, its your OCD and it's all in your head.
You are a very special person, and yeah it sucks that we have this thing that we gotta live with, that convinces you that you're some pedophilic, incestual creature with murderous intent, but its just your thoughts, and thats what OCD is, it causes you to OBSESS over them, it doesn't make you a criminal, it doesn't make you a freak, it makes you a human with a disorder known as Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and thats all it'll ever be.
Don't ever convince yourself that you're a freak, I had to be told by countless people that it was my OCD before I was finally convinced that it was. (And by "countless people", I mean an OCD website, wikipedia, and my girlfriend)
It also causes you to get upset about hypothetical scenarios even when those scenarios are very unlikely, like if I walked out into my living room and everyone is dead, again, OCD, and then it'll cause you to relapse and think about very specific situations in which you hurt someone, or made their life harder.
None of this makes you a bad person.
Once you convince yourself that you aren't these things, and that you're just going through something that someone with bad OCD has, everything will be much easier.
I hope this helps anyone who struggles.
__________________ Thanks Scribble! | Love my Dani.
Your Lord knows very well what is in your heart. Your soul suffices this day as a reckoner against you. I need no witnesses. You do not listen to your soul, but listen instead to your anger and your rage.
No but forreal, thats one of the things OCD does, you can't really understand unless you have it.
basically, it convinces you that you are this thing through your thoughts.
Like... its hard to explain.
It makes you think up hypothetical situations like raping, attacking, or even killing someone, when you have no desire to do any of those things and never would.
But your brain convinces you that you have an intent and interest in such things due to the fact you have those unwanted thoughts.
If you have unwanted thoughts that travel into your brain, almost every day, its probably OCD.
Basically what it does is, like, let's say you're hanging out with a little cousin.
Because you like spending time with them, you think in your head "What if I start having feelings for them?" That develops into "omg what if I'm sexually attracted to them."
When clearly, you're overreacting, you don't think those things at all.
I've read forum sites where countless people with OCD go through these things every day due to their severe OCD.
I've even seen people who thought they were attracted to animals because of situations where a dog would put their paw on their crotch or something.
Same with other awful things.
It causes you to be too scared to go to your doctor, or a therapist, because you think, again, that they'll think you are those things, or be disgusted with you, and they won't, because they're qualified to help you.
__________________ Thanks Scribble! | Love my Dani.
Honestly I had a completely different understanding to OCD before this. I never really knew so much about it or understood it. It possibly affects people in different ways. The only extent I knew it to was people who were OCD about cleaning and thatís mainly from shows that Iíve seen. They would be convinced they could die if they didnít thoroughly take away every germ.
I think I understand the concept of it now. As youíve mentioned here too. Being so convinced about an idea. That could be about completely anything. People do believe itís bad and they beat themselves up about it because they think a specific way. This doesnít change who you are as a person.
I know you personally and I know how incredible, loving and kind you are. This wonít make you bad or actually physically believe these things itís just mainly in your mind. You run wild with one idea when you know in reality itís not you.
Thank You, Scribble c: | Love my Jeffy :3
Gender: Male Location: The Darkest Corner of your Mind
Yeah, I have my fair share of unpleasant random thoughts that will for like 2 seconds cause me do uncontrolled shit if I'm not under control (e.g snap my pencil in half if I'm in the middle of writing from tensing up for a second.)
I wouldn't attribute it to OCD though. (I do consider myself to be somewhat OCPD though)
If anything my unpleasant thoughts are from minor PTSD episodes (from stupid shit that really shouldn't affect most people)
__________________ "When something is important enough, you do it even if the odds are not in your favor." - Elon Musk
Iíve had OCD for as long as I can remember.
The day I found out itís an actual documented condition other people have was one of the happiest days of my life. Before that I vaguely considered myself insane.
Most people associate it with hand washing, but itís actually the horrifying intruding thoughts that is the problem. And rituals that accompany them.
Can relate to everything Jmanghan said.
Azula: My mommy didn't love me so I'm going to burn down your village.