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mechmoggy
Northern Monkey
Gender: Male Location: Changing nappies |
The Drunk-O-Meter
Pictrure the scene....
It's a weekend and you wake up with a monster hangover. "Ouch my melon, exactly how drunk was I last night?"
Well here's the answer you all want to help with that morning after feeling, the Moggy Co. patented Drunk-O-Meter.
Simply get out the trousers/jeans/combats you were wearing on the offending night, whether they are on the floor or hanging from the light shade, and count the change in your pockets and use the following scale. (Works for any currency).
£1-5 in change = Mildy tipsy
£6-10 in change = Drunk
£11-15 in change = Mingin pissed up
£16-20 in change = Oh my god, I've never seen you so drunk!
£21-?? in change = Leave town you have embaressed yourself and others way beyond repair.
I swear I use the system every week, it works because the more drunk you get the less inclined you feel to count out change for each round of drinks whilst keeping one eye closed so that your hand and the money keep still.
Enjoy.
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Nov 8th, 2001 01:35 PM |
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finti
Senior Member
Gender: Unspecified Location: |
hmm use the coins to tip, but usually i leave the visa in the bar
only barometer I have is to see how large the bill was. and it is sometimes scary huge
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Nov 8th, 2001 02:08 PM |
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mechmoggy
Northern Monkey
Gender: Male Location: Changing nappies |
I only failed to use my system once, a few weeks ago, but that was because I woke up with body glitter all over my chest, teeth marks in my leg and my toe-nails on my left foot were painted pink. I had no need for the scale to tell me how drunk I was that night. Damn prankster mates.
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Nov 9th, 2001 10:22 AM |
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finti
Senior Member
Gender: Unspecified Location: |
Going out with the pub staff tonight, it is free bar Yahooo
and I havent been out for a month Can I get more drunk?
I hope someone brings a video cam. I might have to watch what happened tomorrow.
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Nov 9th, 2001 12:02 PM |
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Tex
Yumsz
Gender: Unspecified Location: Tampa, FL, USA |
Drunks have very low sperm counts
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Nov 9th, 2001 08:24 PM |
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sand person no. 10
where are the other nine
Gender: Unspecified Location: West Midlands UK |
1, 2, 3, 4 dammit!!!!!
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why would birds want to have sex with bees ??? surely the birds would get stung and the bees would get eaten?
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Nov 10th, 2001 03:26 AM |
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Tex
Yumsz
Gender: Unspecified Location: Tampa, FL, USA |
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Nov 10th, 2001 05:45 AM |
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ToMacco
Mr. Orange
Gender: Male Location: A bar in Minnesota |
Brew's on ME! *ToMacco hands out beer, happily*
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4 8 15 16 23 42
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Nov 10th, 2001 06:47 AM |
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Dim
Creativity
Gender: Unspecified Location: Southern California |
You need to think one up for girls, mech..I don't think this one works quite as well...
As it is..I only have the vomit-meter..
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Nov 10th, 2001 01:51 PM |
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mechmoggy
Northern Monkey
Gender: Male Location: Changing nappies |
The vomit-meter! I like the sound of that, would you like me to get a patent pending on that?
Think of the possibilities, we can release a whole range of drunk-o-meters for all ages and sexes.
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Nov 12th, 2001 10:21 AM |
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DJ Velocity
The one and only
Gender: Unspecified Location: Hartlepool, England |
The best thing to do is to get a tin of butane lighter gas, push the valve into your teeth and inhale the vapors. Its quite cold but try to perservere...
Hold it for 5 seconds and let it out whilst saying R-O-B-O-C-O-P.
It feels like your skull is made out of tin and has been filled with cottonwool.
Oh btw, I am only joking, don't do this solvent abuse does kill!!!
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Nov 12th, 2001 10:59 AM |
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Dim
Creativity
Gender: Unspecified Location: Southern California |
mech..I do think you should grab that patent up....we could use it for bother pregnancy and drunkeness..
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Nov 12th, 2001 02:49 PM |
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finti
Senior Member
Gender: Unspecified Location: |
and the wuv word !!!!!!
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Nov 12th, 2001 02:53 PM |
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ToMacco
Mr. Orange
Gender: Male Location: A bar in Minnesota |
DJ V, good thing you said you were only kidding, I was about to try it!
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4 8 15 16 23 42
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Nov 12th, 2001 03:53 PM |
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DJ Velocity
The one and only
Gender: Unspecified Location: Hartlepool, England |
Does that sort of thing go on in the US. I've always wanted to know that?
I myself haven't done it and I wouldn't. My friend on the other hand has tried everything when he was young, gas, nail varnish, Tip-Ex, glue. It is quite common in the UK for kids to get "dizzy" like this.
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Nov 13th, 2001 08:38 AM |
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mechmoggy
Northern Monkey
Gender: Male Location: Changing nappies |
I spent the first two years of secondary school sniffing tip-ex thinners of my coat sleeve.
Aaah, happy days. And it never effected me did it?
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Nov 13th, 2001 10:33 AM |
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finti
Senior Member
Gender: Unspecified Location: |
not as long as you dont hear the helicopter hoovering all the time. MECH dive to the ground
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Nov 13th, 2001 12:31 PM |
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mechmoggy
Northern Monkey
Gender: Male Location: Changing nappies |
*Mech instictively dives to ground grazing his chin and getting little bits of gravel in his hands*
Damn you Finti!!!!!!!
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Nov 13th, 2001 01:12 PM |
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sand person no. 10
where are the other nine
Gender: Unspecified Location: West Midlands UK |
how much do people drink when they go out. i end up spending about 60 quid on booze at the moment. i then have a sixty pound hangover the next day. good stuff i think not.
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why would birds want to have sex with bees ??? surely the birds would get stung and the bees would get eaten?
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Nov 13th, 2001 11:43 PM |
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