KillerMovies - Movies That Matter!

REGISTER HERE TO JOIN IN! - It's easy and it's free!
Home » Misc » Artwork Forum » Poetry Corner » My poetry

My poetry
Started by: calvinNhobbes

Forum Jump:
Post New Thread    Post A Reply
Pages (4): « 1 2 [3] 4 »   Last Thread   Next Thread
Author
Thread
calvinNhobbes
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location: United States

OK one last poem before I split. Here is some work that I just needed to wrote to spit out words and just...........write!! It's not the best but it was a fun exercise at least which reminds me, I still have to work on a poem for Ou Be low's thread on the Jabberwocky. Its been two weeks and I still haven't finished that exercise yet. Anyway if anyone wants a good mental exercise go check it out and then try it out.


Untitled

Superfluous words pepper my scripture
As I portray a surrealist picture
With eye bolts crossing the skies
And Thunderlids flapping at the breeze
I wonder if I can maintain this with
A semblance of ease
But more words to discover
As perchance extraneous I uncover
One more before the night is through
Benign and obtuse follow behind too.
Suffice it to say my English is
Modicum in a pedestrian way.


__________________
And so it goes.

Old Post Jun 26th, 2005 02:24 AM
calvinNhobbes is currently offline Click here to Send calvinNhobbes a Private Message Find more posts by calvinNhobbes Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
Coldfire
<3 <3 <3

Gender: Female
Location: Vancouver, Canada

Oooooo nice. I'm still pondering that first one lol stick out tongue


__________________

Old Post Jun 26th, 2005 03:48 AM
Coldfire is currently offline Click here to Send Coldfire a Private Message Find more posts by Coldfire Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
calvinNhobbes
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location: United States

well it has been quite awhile since I have returned to this site. I see that Obie lou is back from his banishment with his surreal wit and ego in tow. Plus I also see that there was another contest. Damn, I missed the deadline by over a month. Anyway I am still glad to see that the entries keep on streaming along. I guess I will post a new one here but I am not asking for a crtique because I am just warming up to returning and I will not have the creativeness flowing as easily in this frigid depressing weather we are having in Jersey. So on I go.


I am begining to learn again
I will fail once more
I am starting over
My failure is my success
As long as I do my best

I can see again
I have tunnel vision
I don't see your face.
My focus refined like laser
I will soon forget her.
I see no more from my past

I walk forward from the then
I will not step on broken glass
Those mirrors hold no reflection
I continue straight for my own protection

I make no sense
I can not convey
I may not inspire you
May not today.

But read this once more
try again
the problem is no longer
on my end.


__________________
And so it goes.

Old Post Nov 26th, 2005 06:41 AM
calvinNhobbes is currently offline Click here to Send calvinNhobbes a Private Message Find more posts by calvinNhobbes Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
Coldfire
<3 <3 <3

Gender: Female
Location: Vancouver, Canada

quote: (post)
Originally posted by calvinNhobbes
well it has been quite awhile since I have returned to this site. I see that Obie lou is back from his banishment with his surreal wit and ego in tow. Plus I also see that there was another contest. Damn, I missed the deadline by over a month. Anyway I am still glad to see that the entries keep on streaming along. I guess I will post a new one here but I am not asking for a crtique because I am just warming up to returning and I will not have the creativeness flowing as easily in this frigid depressing weather we are having in Jersey. So on I go.


I am begining to learn again
I will fail once more
I am starting over
My failure is my success
As long as I do my best

I can see again
I have tunnel vision
I don't see your face.
My focus refined like laser
I will soon forget her.
I see no more from my past

I walk forward from the then
I will not step on broken glass
Those mirrors hold no reflection
I continue straight for my own protection

I make no sense
I can not convey
I may not inspire you
May not today.

But read this once more
try again
the problem is no longer
on my end.

OMG HIIIII!!!! eek! I wondered where you went!! How ya been???

I like your poem btw happy


__________________

Old Post Nov 26th, 2005 07:44 AM
Coldfire is currently offline Click here to Send Coldfire a Private Message Find more posts by Coldfire Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
calvinNhobbes
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location: United States

thanks for you enthusiasm Coldfire. I am glad to see you are still here as well, always giving encouragement.

Here is another one. Not about me but more about what is going on in the world today.

Man cuts off his nose to spite his face.
It would be a proper headline for this time and place.

Too crowded and spoiled are we
We act like Zacharia caught looking from the tree.

A child cries, its not mine,
Good for I haven't the time.
To worry or fret
I haven't gotten my dues yet.

How can I
Why would I
I want my ten minutes
before I die.

I buy the gimmicks and gadgets
I dress and make sure everything matches.

I am stylish and cute
with with wit making points that are moot.

Look at me, look at me.
I can jump through hoops too.

Don't I mean anything to you?
Perhaps not, for too late I see
Shit, damn I created a mini me.

Don't quite know where I was going with that one but thats what came out. I am aggravated with my own behavior and selfishness at times. I am more angered by other's as well. I often wonder if I feed the commercialism that spits out opium while a war on drugs kills so many innocents. So much pain painted over by fashion magazines a hollywood. So many layers of insencerity that we can't see the boils festering below. we can't see that society is complacent, leaving an imbalance that can not substain itself for too long. Something is going to give.


__________________
And so it goes.

Old Post Nov 27th, 2005 07:29 AM
calvinNhobbes is currently offline Click here to Send calvinNhobbes a Private Message Find more posts by calvinNhobbes Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
xtheusedxbillyx
small simple safe price

Gender: Unspecified
Location: Australia

yeah they are pretty good....well yeah they are good....better then mine stick out tongue


__________________

Old Post Nov 28th, 2005 06:36 AM
xtheusedxbillyx is currently offline Click here to Send xtheusedxbillyx a Private Message Find more posts by xtheusedxbillyx Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
calvinNhobbes
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location: United States

awake from winter's slumber

Hibernation late in its end has left me searching for my early morning friend.

well I am back after some time. I was quite stumped as to what to write for some time. It is so cool to leave for awhile and come back. Its like finding notebooks from highschool that you would jot down quick little poems in and find years later. Well I am going to look around for inspiration and fill in some of the things on my mind. Whats new? everyone. I know this is a forum for poetry so Perhaps a few topics to throw out for fodder. The continueing war in Iraq . The danger of losing Net Neutrality check out info at www.savetheinternet.com . How many stories do we need to hear about celebrities and their lives. Why do we care enough to make it a viable for businesses in media consumption?


__________________
And so it goes.

Old Post Jun 17th, 2006 07:08 PM
calvinNhobbes is currently offline Click here to Send calvinNhobbes a Private Message Find more posts by calvinNhobbes Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
Coldfire
<3 <3 <3

Gender: Female
Location: Vancouver, Canada

quote: (post)
Originally posted by calvinNhobbes
Hibernation late in its end has left me searching for my early morning friend.

well I am back after some time. I was quite stumped as to what to write for some time. It is so cool to leave for awhile and come back. Its like finding notebooks from highschool that you would jot down quick little poems in and find years later. Well I am going to look around for inspiration and fill in some of the things on my mind. Whats new? everyone. I know this is a forum for poetry so Perhaps a few topics to throw out for fodder. The continueing war in Iraq . The danger of losing Net Neutrality check out info at www.savetheinternet.com . How many stories do we need to hear about celebrities and their lives. Why do we care enough to make it a viable for businesses in media consumption?

eek! Glad to see you back again big grin


__________________

Old Post Jun 18th, 2006 03:29 AM
Coldfire is currently offline Click here to Send Coldfire a Private Message Find more posts by Coldfire Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
calvinNhobbes
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location: United States

Back again. I haven't been here for awhile. Although I do still come to read others from time to time. We have many prolific poets in this corner of the web. Like Prince, Coldfire, YA krunk. Its good to see that we are also acquiring new poets as well. I'm hoping that someone is going to do another contest soon. I really enjoy reading the entries and noticing the different style.

Yesterday It snowed and snowed and snowed. A real winter for a change. I am glad to see this.


Snow covered earth
leaves muted air
drift off to sleep
without a care

Argh ah. I don't know what to write right now. Just wanted to type something I guess. Hope everyone is doing well. I'll be checking back sooner than I did last time.


__________________
And so it goes.

Old Post Feb 12th, 2010 04:02 AM
calvinNhobbes is currently offline Click here to Send calvinNhobbes a Private Message Find more posts by calvinNhobbes Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
Cammii
You'll be the death of me

Gender: Female
Location:

Nice (=


__________________



You'll be the death of me.

Old Post Feb 12th, 2010 05:53 PM
Cammii is currently offline Click here to Send Cammii a Private Message Find more posts by Cammii Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
calvinNhobbes
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location: United States

Thanks Cammi. Here is another one. Not quite fully realized but I liked the concept and think it just needs a little tweaking. Let me know what you think.


Open possibilities lead the way out of
Confined limitations.
Misled ideas find themselves lost behind
innuendos and freudian slips.
Lost in such a populace place they lose
their power and never grow correctly
Although the mindscape crumbles
its spectacle laid beauty before my eyes
There is purity that I sift out of the remains


Stuck in the past like crazy glue

Love is what you weren't looking for
Lust is what you wanted.


__________________
And so it goes.

Old Post Mar 6th, 2010 08:06 PM
calvinNhobbes is currently offline Click here to Send calvinNhobbes a Private Message Find more posts by calvinNhobbes Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
Cammii
You'll be the death of me

Gender: Female
Location:

I enjoy these (:


__________________



You'll be the death of me.

Old Post Mar 6th, 2010 08:27 PM
Cammii is currently offline Click here to Send Cammii a Private Message Find more posts by Cammii Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
calvinNhobbes
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location: United States

thank you.


__________________
And so it goes.

Old Post Mar 6th, 2010 08:55 PM
calvinNhobbes is currently offline Click here to Send calvinNhobbes a Private Message Find more posts by calvinNhobbes Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
calvinNhobbes
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location: United States

New poem

Needs a title so for now it remains untitled.

I wrote this one late at night. Its kind of a different style for me but seems to be close to the previous one I did.




Transcontinental thoughts fly through my mind
With layovers in innovation and imagination

Refueling with dreams and surreal anagrams
Plucked by hand on a distant memory shore

To give credence to vagueness but
Power to reality

Completing their full circle
Jet lag takes its toll

And the edges of reality become frayed
With the splinters of nostalgia dipped
in sweet memories of dusk and fireflies

Golden suns crest like waves
In the ebbing ocean

Such enormity is my memory

It is the weight upon which I balance
While I wait for my reflection.


__________________
And so it goes.

Old Post May 4th, 2010 12:37 AM
calvinNhobbes is currently offline Click here to Send calvinNhobbes a Private Message Find more posts by calvinNhobbes Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
kava_kava
Member

Gender: Female
Location: United States

Re: New poem

its good but at the same time i think your pulling out your dictionary or thesaurus a little much. whatever word you draw in you want to develop it and for it to be crucial, not just high diction or intellectually sounding vocab. i like how your poem sounds, but you also have to give heed to your overall image and flow. what is your overall image here? how do you move from airport runway to splinters and fireflies, and the ocean.

i like your poem. i would work on the connection between airports and oceans

Old Post May 6th, 2010 04:35 AM
kava_kava is currently offline Click here to Send kava_kava a Private Message Find more posts by kava_kava Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
calvinNhobbes
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location: United States

Thank you for your suggestions Kava Kava. I didn't need to use any reference material to write this though. All words were there at the moment. Like I said I was just trying to fall asleep and these lines ran through my mind.
I wasn't really speaking of air travel even though I did use the word Jet lag, perhaps I should take that out. It was more about thought, mindscape with a layover in memories that hold the power of the oceans and whose imagery burns as bright as sun. It is upon this scene I wait to see my reflection because I reflect upon this scene. I couldn't put all of that into the lines because I was thinking the lines as they came.
The splinters and fireflies was an offshoot of a sliver of a memory to relate what I was talking about. Perhaps I need to be more clearer or add more lines.
I hope this adds to the rereading of the poem. Let me know what you think. And thanks again.


__________________
And so it goes.

Last edited by calvinNhobbes on May 7th, 2010 at 12:33 AM

Old Post May 7th, 2010 12:23 AM
calvinNhobbes is currently offline Click here to Send calvinNhobbes a Private Message Find more posts by calvinNhobbes Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
Cammii
You'll be the death of me

Gender: Female
Location:

Just to voice my thought, not saying anything to harm anyone. But i think that poems are from how you feel , I mean there really shouldnt be a plot really to it. It should be able to flow into differnt areas. It should be able to exspand into differnt areas, the writer should remind them selfs that there is no set goal into writing poetry but just to go with it. It should reach out and touch the reader and them selfs at the same time, to share there storie not only with them selfs but with others. Get the reader to feel and think how you are. I've been writing poetry for years, I just finally am spell and grammer checking it all. But calvinNhobbes i really enjoy your poetry, I know what your trying to get us to see. (:.

Much love

-Camille Lynn-


__________________



You'll be the death of me.

Old Post May 8th, 2010 07:12 PM
Cammii is currently offline Click here to Send Cammii a Private Message Find more posts by Cammii Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
calvinNhobbes
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location: United States

Hi Cammii. Thank you for your thoughts. I know exactly what you are saying. Editing poetry seems to be counter intuitive to its inherent purpose. On the other hand if and edit conveys a stronger response or clearer understanding perhaps it is not such a bad process. I know that some poems I write are initially emotional and tied closely to the moment but upon rereading they may be missing something or lacking a key element that can make it touch more people than just myself. It is a good question to bring up on a separate thread. To edit or not to edit, that is the question.

I only speak for myself because I know that I have often needed a little help and others may not. I also realize, from experience, that an unexamined life is not worth living ( I know Socrates said it) but an over examined life can be hard to live. I try to balance that. I edit, sometimes and other times, depending on the story behind the poem I leave it as is. I would say that a larger percentage of my poems are rough and unedited than are not.
Anyway, this one will stay the way it is. I like it as is and the post I gave explaining myself should clear it up and add to the poem. I hope. Until next time. Peace


__________________
And so it goes.

Old Post May 9th, 2010 03:57 AM
calvinNhobbes is currently offline Click here to Send calvinNhobbes a Private Message Find more posts by calvinNhobbes Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
Cammii
You'll be the death of me

Gender: Female
Location:

Your welcome, Pretty much that is the main queston of it all " To edit, Or not to edit". But my point still stands where poetry should just be open, it really has no need to tie togather. I mean it can be random but it should at least touch the readers.


__________________



You'll be the death of me.

Old Post May 12th, 2010 04:17 PM
Cammii is currently offline Click here to Send Cammii a Private Message Find more posts by Cammii Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
kava_kava
Member

Gender: Female
Location: United States

i write alot of poetry that people can't understand but that's because i write it for me. If you want your poetry to touch other people you have to develop the images and lines. for example its okay to talk about splinters and fireflies, i love that line, but if you want me to enjoy it, just develop it more. if not, then its a poem that only touches you, which is great.

Old Post May 13th, 2010 06:36 PM
kava_kava is currently offline Click here to Send kava_kava a Private Message Find more posts by kava_kava Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote Quick Quote
All times are UTC. The time now is 02:07 AM.
Pages (4): « 1 2 [3] 4 »   Last Thread   Next Thread

Home » Misc » Artwork Forum » Poetry Corner » My poetry

Email this Page
Subscribe to this Thread
   Post New Thread  Post A Reply

Forum Jump:
Search by user:
 

Forum Rules:
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is OFF
vB code is ON
Smilies are ON
[IMG] code is ON

Text-only version
 

< - KillerMovies.com - Forum Archive - Forum Rules >


© Copyright 2000-2006, KillerMovies.com. All Rights Reserved.
Powered by: vBulletin, copyright ©2000-2006, Jelsoft Enterprises Limited.