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Hiya Guys, Just a Small Little Rant
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katelovespirate
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spectacularly argued and summed up, Willo. bravo. That just about covers all of it, and why we are angry. Mayhaps we should risk controversy on Wordplayer and post this there, with a requested explanation (which of course we will never get) for why it ended how it did.

Old Post Dec 5th, 2007 08:11 PM
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willofthewisp
Savvy did my sig

Gender: Female
Location: at the second star to the right

I mean, they didn't even give us willabeth, not really. At least throw us that.

(Ted and Terry sorting through their fan mail)

Terry: Have you found that special package from Gore yet?

Ted: No! How nice. He always knows when our stash is running low. (they share a knowing look)

Terry: Hey, Ted, look at this. What's KMC?

Ted: That's where the crazy fans hang out. We went to some PirateDiva's school and stirred the waters.

Terry: ha ha, stirred the waters. And they're pirate movies.

Ted: I'm the funny one, Terry. Don't pretend. But look what I've found.
(passes note to Terry)

Terry: (skimming and making comments as he goes) What? What the hell's willabeth? Kiss....50 foot women....everyone dies.......no closure with the J/E relationship....that must stand for Juliet and Edward, her cousin written out of the play.

Ted: Are you sure it doesn't stand for Jack and Elizabeth? Our own characters?

Terry: Oh. I was just testing you. (shifty eyes, continues to skim) No one satisfied with third installment, too many plot holes and too little explanations. I guess they're mad?

Ted: They only tolerate AWE from the sounds of it. It's become the Attack of the Clones for our series.

Terry: No! Not that!

Ted: I'm afraid so. I thought it was so good. We gave the audience just a little bit and let them figure out the rest. I mean, it doesn't take a brain surgeon to figure out that the green flash and the smiles on Elizabeth and Junior's faces indicate Will is back for good.

Terry: Well, then this isn't a good time to break it to you that Gore sent us the dvd. They've posted that Will is cursed for eternity.

Ted: Is he?

Terry: I don't know. I was hoping you would.

Ted: What does that mean for Jack?

Terry: We never closed Jack's story hoping POTC4: Jack Strangles Mickey Mouse in a Fit of Drunken Rage would close out his story.

Ted: I don't like that title.

Terry: Me either. But Gore says it's what Michael Eisner wants.

Ted: Hmm, this sounds serious. (calls Gore on his razor phone)

Gore: Gore here, famous director who looks good in shorts.

Ted: Gore?

Gore: Ted? Hey! I sent you guys more pot.

Ted: This is neither the time nor the place, Gore. What the hell is wrong with your company?

Gore: Beg pardon?

Terry: (is put on) You know, "Elizabeth's story has yet to be told" and more subtle hints that even though you've screwed our couple for life, you still don't want to just flat out say she stays a pirate and pillages for a living.

Gore: We wanted to keep things vague. You guys mentioned a sequel even though Orlando and Keira weren't interested.

Ted: Exactly! They aren't interested! The next installment is Jack's story!

Gore: Jack? Oh that guy. Second banana to the monkey. ha ha, monkey. Wait, didn't one of you want to pair him off with Elizabeth?

Ted: We toyed with the idea, yes, and decided on...I hate to use this....willabeth. But you took our Odyssey-esque ending and made it awful! What gives?

Gore: Hold on. Let's not fight. You guys nowhere in your bombastic attempt at a series finale said that after 10 years Will was free. We just assumed and answered the questions as such.

Terry: Nowhere in the movie? Are you kidding? It's everywhere! Davy Jones and Tia have a whole scene about it.

Gore: Oh, I thought you left that scene in as a character piece, not to actually explain anything. No one trusts villains anyway.

Ted: (crawling into fetal position) No way out, no way out...

Terry: Calm down over there. (back to Gore) Look, can't you retract the statement or something?

Gore: No! Now everyone's on the same page. Pissed, but on the same page. The dvd is selling faster than Scarlett and Giselle on a day when the navy and the pirates come to port, so you shouldn't be complaining. Johnny's happy, Keira's happy, Orli's happy.

Ted: Tell that to Jack, Jonathan, Tom, uh, Chow...who am I leaving out?

Terry: Technically, Bill.

Ted: Bill

Terry: the kraken puppeteers.

Ted: The kraken puppeteers. You killed them all! And yet you spared Stellan. Stellan? The starfish bastard who left his son? You're lucky Keith isn't on your ass.

Gore: Okay, here is what we'll do. We leave the dvd as is and whenever someone asks you about it, just beat around the bush and shove pictures of Jack Sparrow into their horny faces. Sound good?

Terry: Yeah.

Ted: Yeah.

Gore: Good. Now open my stash I sent you so I can come over and have a circle moment. I invited Johnny.



End


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Old Post Dec 5th, 2007 09:09 PM
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savvysparrowluv
Queen of the Night

Gender: Female
Location: Under the stars

ROFL!!! Love it, love it, love it! Happy Dance

I can almost see something like that happening too, lol stick out tongue

Old Post Dec 5th, 2007 10:00 PM
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SelinaAndBruce
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Gender: Female
Location: United States

Am I like the only Jack Sparrow fan in the world who doesn't want him with that dolt Elizabeth? I'm not a Willabeth fan, perse but I want them together because I don't want Jack anywhere near dull ass Elizabeth


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Bruce: You've got, sort of a dark side, don't you?

Selina: No darker than yours, Bruce

Old Post Dec 5th, 2007 10:39 PM
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katelovespirate
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hmmm... on this forum, probably. we all rather like Elizabeth, I think, though like everyone, she can be a bit of a dolt sometimes. It's not her fault she's the only female in the caribbean.

Willo, what can i say??? I want to hear about the circle!!! hahahaahhaahah that was great. smile I can SOOOOO picture that happening.

Old Post Dec 5th, 2007 11:34 PM
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IheartPocky
Not a sausage..

Gender: Female
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lol funnybig grin


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Old Post Dec 5th, 2007 11:36 PM
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willofthewisp
Savvy did my sig

Gender: Female
Location: at the second star to the right

Elizabeth is awesome, and we're primarily a sparrabeth forum, but we welcome all.

Ah, the circle.

(Gore and Johnny have arrived. Johnny is being classy and has brought a wine basket. It cuts to a That 70s Show stoner circle)

Johnny: So, let me get this straight, the fans don't like AWE? We had a blast!

Gore: Dude, when you talk, it sounds like Sweeny Todd singing.

Johnny: I mean, Tom is a freakin' riot and Kevin with a teddy bear? That's Oscar worthy stuff. Damn Hollywood and its high standard!

Terry: I'm a trained writer! It's not like I sit in a room and stare at my hand all day.

Ted: That was a fun day we did that, though.

Terry: (stares at his hand and speaks slowly and deliberately) Will...should stab the heart and be captain of the Flying Dutchman.

Johnny: We already filmed that...we should remake AWE! Ridley Scott...or is it Tony Scott...one of them remade Bladerunner and everyone loves the remake.

Gore: Remakes goes against everything Disney stands for.

Ted: Disney. Sounds like a gourmet spaghetti sauce. Anyone want some meatballs?

Terry: If we remake AWE, we have to rehire Keira, rehire Orli...

Johnny: Let's call him Lando.

Terry: Too much Star Wars comparisons. Much? Many? Hmm. But we have to rehire everyone, go back to Singapore, talk to Jonathan again.

Gore: Yeah.....Jonathan's pretty pissed at everyone right now. He egged my house.

Johnny: How's he know where you live?

Gore: Wait...that wasn't my house that was egged...what the hell am I talking about?

Terry: (now staring at his hand) And Elizabeth should have a child and we'll call it Will Junior because Theodore is the name of a Chipmunk.

Johnny: I was asked to be in Alvin and the Chipmunks, but I was working with Tim and Helena. I wonder if that will hurt me later...

Ted: Don't the fans like seeing Davy as a human? Or, or seeing Barbossa come back? Or when Jack finally got the Pearl back and fired his one shot that he'd been saving for 10 years?

Gore: More 10 year crap. That's what started this whole mess.

Terry: Ted, you're talking about the wrong movie. You're describing Shrek.

Gore: (singing) Somebody once told me/the world is gonna rule me...

Johnny: (starting to become an affectionate, loud stoner) Man, Lily was watching Shrek for the first time and she called Donkey a horse. If she had been in AWE, everyone would have loved it, man! Lily the pirate. Ha ha, she still wets herself.

Terry: Yep, big Keith Richards cameo...cut to little girl wetting herself. Fans would have gone crazy for it. "That's Johnny Depp's daughter. Aw, how cute." You're the problem with AWE, Johnny!

Ted: I take offense to that, sir! (takes off his glove and slaps him with it)

Terry: You, you, you swagger around in your Oscar-nominated performance and steal all the fans' hearts and you didn't adlib one damn kiss with Keira. Not one! That's all they wanted.

Ted: I can't kiss Keira because she's too young and I'm married! (tearing up) She also eats a lot of peanuts and I'm allergic! If her tongue still had peanut residue on it, and she kissed me with it, I'd swell up and pop.

Gore: Dude, maybe we shouldn't talk about Keira's tongue.

Johnny: She doesn't really use her tongue much. Oh, you said stop.

Gore: Dudes, I want to talk about Naomie's tongue. There was a hottie that didn't get to kiss anyone. Am I right? Am I right? Nah, none of you care.

Ted: Naomie...50 foot naked hotness. How could the fans not like that? She was naked?

Terry: Because no guy wants to be able to...uh, "commit" to her fully, if ya know what I mean.

Gore: No.

Johnny: No.

Ted: No.

Terry: Okay, picture this-- things are getting hot and heavy with your 50 foot woman and let's just say you'd have to put the condom over all of you.

Gore: And with that, I'm going to go sober up.


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Old Post Dec 6th, 2007 01:27 AM
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savvysparrowluv
Queen of the Night

Gender: Female
Location: Under the stars

*pounds fist on floor, tears up from laughing*

Oh, wow...that was hilarious! I'm totally saving that to a word document to read on rainy days stick out tongue

Great job! big grin big grin big grin

Old Post Dec 6th, 2007 01:53 AM
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katelovespirate
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oh...my...gosh.... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA wow.... that crossed SOOOO many lines and it was SOOOO great...

Old Post Dec 6th, 2007 02:05 AM
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SelinaAndBruce
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Gender: Female
Location: United States

quote: (post)
Originally posted by katelovespirate
hmmm... on this forum, probably. we all rather like Elizabeth, I think, though like everyone, she can be a bit of a dolt sometimes. It's not her fault she's the only female in the caribbean.

Willo, what can i say??? I want to hear about the circle!!! hahahaahhaahah that was great. smile I can SOOOOO picture that happening.

I don't mind Elizabeth for Will but she is just not woman enough for Jack


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Bruce: You've got, sort of a dark side, don't you?

Selina: No darker than yours, Bruce

Old Post Dec 6th, 2007 03:34 AM
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katelovespirate
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hmmm.... there's a perspective i dont think we've heard. of course, after AWE, my opinion of whether Elizabeth could be with Jack changed slightly, but it was never on account of Elizabeth being lacking in any qualities.

What's not to love? She's pretty, strong, impulsive, dramatic, and not afraid to dive into a rough world. She can play with the best of them, out-wit famous pirates (and out-drink them), swordfight really well, and she's not just another pretty face. Not to mention she's charming, clever, and deals with a lot of stress pretty well. She's a great disney heroine. What's the problem?

Honestly, my biggest problem with Elizabeth is her hair in DMC. wink And the fact that she kisses everyone in the third movie (which is, I think, T and T's attempt to downplay the Sparrabeth kiss--- NICE TRY.)

Old Post Dec 6th, 2007 04:19 AM
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SelinaAndBruce
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Gender: Female
Location: United States

Elizabeth is nothing more than an annoying wannabe tag along to me. I simply never took to her at all. She's not what I had i mind for a heroine but she's the classic Disney heroine woman of all trades sort who all the men can't resist. She just doesn't ring true to me and she's not fire enough for Jack IMO. I consider her rather dull overall. She has many sides and many assets but they don't fit together into an explosive person. Just a person who can do a lot of things.

I would want Jack with someone more fiery and fierce than Elizabeth. I'm newer to the Pirates but especially after viewing Dead Man's Chest I am simply not interested in Sparrabeth overall.

Jack Sparrow is a free spirited adventurer his women are best left to descriptions, names and fond recollections not to be tagging along with him. He is like James Bond in a sense that the women simply will never be able to keep up so there is no point in trying and really who has an interest in seeing it overall? Not me anyway.

Will and Elizabeth work together to me. They are a unit and a team who complement each other well. Though really I'd rather Will go full out pirate and sail the world with Jack. But if anyone must be stuck with the ball and chain who can sword fight and do a million other things best it's Will than the great Jack Sparrow.


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Bruce: You've got, sort of a dark side, don't you?

Selina: No darker than yours, Bruce

Last edited by SelinaAndBruce on Dec 6th, 2007 at 04:35 AM

Old Post Dec 6th, 2007 04:32 AM
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Sifzensinril
Meself

Gender: Female
Location: In middle of nowhere

Two of my friends are Willabethers like you, but main problem with them is they don't have same reasons to be Willabethers.

One is Willabether, because she simply loves Jack so much and she's unable to see him with Lizzie (because it would be like cheating to her) and second is Willabether, because she loves Will so much and she wouldn't like him end up without a girl. And some other Willabethers just simply follow the movie.

So that's main problem with Willabeth, it doesn't unite shippers too much, there is always lot of difference "WHY do they love it?"


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If every town was like Tortuga, it would be easy to find Captain Jack Sparrow

A sparrabeth fanlisting love

Old Post Dec 6th, 2007 06:10 AM
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SelinaAndBruce
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by Sifzensinril
Two of my friends are Willabethers like you, but main problem with them is they don't have same reasons to be Willabethers.

One is Willabether, because she simply loves Jack so much and she's unable to see him with Lizzie (because it would be like cheating to her) and second is Willabether, because she loves Will so much and she wouldn't like him end up without a girl. And some other Willabethers just simply follow the movie.

So that's main problem with Willabeth, it doesn't unite shippers too much, there is always lot of difference "WHY do they love it?"

I mean I'm not much of a Willabether in a dream world Jack and Will would dump the broad off at the next dock and tame the high seas together without her.

I'm a No Elizabether period, but if she's gotta stick around she has the most believable connection with Will in my opinion, not that I don't pity him for it. Also I am a Sparrow Fan First and to me he doesn't need a girl and if he does need one Elizabeth is surely not the one he needs IMO.

I don't begrudge Sparrabethers, I just don't get it as a Sparrow fan first laughing out loud


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Bruce: You've got, sort of a dark side, don't you?

Selina: No darker than yours, Bruce

Old Post Dec 6th, 2007 06:29 AM
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willofthewisp
Savvy did my sig

Gender: Female
Location: at the second star to the right

I never saw her as a tag-along. She seemed more like the pro-active type that didn't have to wait around for someone else to start the action. She thinks fast and at least in the first movie, a lot of exposition about pirates comes from her. She is the one who explains to us what parley is and then is the one that lists Jack's "accomplishments," giving us a background on his infamy and shows off her obsession with pirates. She seems take-charge to me and that's the direct opposite of tag-along. She's annoying sometimes, oh yeah, especially at the beginning of AWE where she refuses to just tell Will what's going on. But compared to the other women in the series like Anamaria, Liz is a free-thinker too, coming up with ideas and keeping faith when others are all set to give up. I like the increasing importance she had in the series, making it all the way to pirate king, which I'm sure she still has at the end of the series, so now she's a working mom just like I'll be.

But sometimes I agree with you that Jack would be better off with someone else. I mean, she's married now and he needs a single girl.


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Old Post Dec 6th, 2007 01:36 PM
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lovethemtigers
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Location: Drinking rum with Jack in a dingy

yeah...as much as I get aggravated with Elizabeth..I never saw her as a tag-along...and I thought she was matched with Jack...I mean she did out-smart the man a few times!

But......It really wasn't Elizabeth's fault that she ended up quite boring at certain points in AWE..that was Ted and Terry and Gore's fault.....

and I keep saying this..cuz it's what I believe...Elizabeth was married....married till death do them part.....for all points and purposes Will is dead....Liz is a widow......there I go dreaming again...

Come to think of it....she did look like a school morm standing on that cliff in the 10 years later scene.....poor lizzy..she went domestic on us....but that is what women do when they settle down and have babies...that's what happen to me!


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Old Post Dec 6th, 2007 02:39 PM
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SelinaAndBruce
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by lovethemtigers
yeah...as much as I get aggravated with Elizabeth..I never saw her as a tag-along...and I thought she was matched with Jack...I mean she did out-smart the man a few times!

But......It really wasn't Elizabeth's fault that she ended up quite boring at certain points in AWE..that was Ted and Terry and Gore's fault.....

and I keep saying this..cuz it's what I believe...Elizabeth was married....married till death do them part.....for all points and purposes Will is dead....Liz is a widow......there I go dreaming again...

Come to think of it....she did look like a school morm standing on that cliff in the 10 years later scene.....poor lizzy..she went domestic on us....but that is what women do when they settle down and have babies...that's what happen to me!

Well I considered her a tag along myself she was just a girl who had fantasies about pirate life and wanted to be down so bad to me. I just don't care for the character much at all. Will and Jack I love but Elizabeth is just a nuisance.


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Bruce: You've got, sort of a dark side, don't you?

Selina: No darker than yours, Bruce

Old Post Dec 6th, 2007 06:11 PM
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katelovespirate
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Jack and Will sailing off and being pirates together? I dont know how to say this... but i think they would kill each other.

frankly, i don't know how much more fiery and fierce you get than Elizabeth--- she is a total spitfire, and you can see that from about the first five minutes of film 1 straight through to the end of film 3. she is always swordfighting, implusively attacking people, letting her temper explode, all the time. i mean seriously--- there are many examples, but take film 2-- instead of waiting around in prison for will to rescue her, she ditches her father, blackmails beckett with a pistol, disguises herself as a man and commandeers a ship, dives into a barfight in tortuga, then once they get to isle cruses, she lets out a long and much needed rant against the men, then fights pintel and ragetti, then fights the fish people, then leads the charge against the kraken, then kills the main character with a kiss of death in order to save her own skin. if she got any more fiery, she would not be allowed in a disney movie. not saying you have to like her, but i dont think she's lacking in the personality department.

Old Post Dec 7th, 2007 12:21 AM
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willofthewisp
Savvy did my sig

Gender: Female
Location: at the second star to the right

May I ask why you like Will but don't like Elizabeth? Just curious.


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Old Post Dec 7th, 2007 12:55 AM
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texgodiva2s
IyamwhatIyam

Gender: Female
Location: please vote, it matters

Miz S&B, you are a dedicated no/Bether then, it's an amazing stance, with which you seem content. Another smart piratista with a decided twist in thinking. Who'dathunkit? I keep thinkin' we've gotten all the juice outta these grapes then along comes someone with a slightly different take. Thankee dearie--new is very interesting.


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Old Post Dec 7th, 2007 05:55 AM
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