I stair at the floor
I look at light.
I see the pain coming over me.
I feel my heart brake.
My stomach in pain, the ink goes deep.
Gay pride it shines,it is true it seems.
But your the only guy that has ever took my heart.
Later that night achohal sinks into my veins.
Poising me, i can't believe. The room is spinning.
Faces blurrying, you walk in the room, i feel the tears.
I know we where both single, but you told me you loved me.
I thought we would be together, i thought you wanted me.
She seen us together, holding each others hand.
When i left she kissed you,how could that be.
Rumors have it you wanted her to, you held her close.
I can't breath i cant accept you broke me in half.
You wont listen to me.
You yell you scream, say you care about me.
But now i think your just playing with me.
these poems are what happened to me ,a couple days ago..they go in line in what happen
We been friend for year or so now.
You can feel my tears press agenst you chest.
You tell me to forget him, hes not worth the pain.
I can't beleive you would give me more achohal.
I had enough , i feel so sick so weak so dead on the inside.
I cant sleep here to night, my brothers passed out and high.
So i go into you room i layed my side.
Tears flooding you rock me at my side.
I feel the numbness come over me.
Its starting to get dark i pass out at your side.
Alone laying there passed out drunk.
You start to touch me in places you shouldnt.
You tart to come in side,im trying to wake up and cry.
After you finshed i was awake,scared and broken.
Are friend ship means nothing.So when you fall asleep i get up and run
My heart is pounding my lungs collapsing.
I run to my brothers aparment right next door.
I scream for help i collaspe at the door.
Wake up brother i just got raped.
Im going to have a panic attack im going to die on the floor.
You pick me up carry me in , you calm me down
And hold me so strong.
Your girlfriends talking rubing the tears away.
You make me in hail the ciggerate, so i can calm down for a second.
You lay me on the couch, say its five in the morning .
I need sleep im starting to get sick.
You made me fall asleep but i woke up on the couch right next to your bed.
You tell my friend what happened he started to flip.
And grabed me tightly.
You start to cry you ay your sorry i should of stayed with you last night,
He went for hi knife to cut up the mother ****er who did this to me.
I told you i needed you,the pain is killing me inside.
So you just hold me never let me leave your side.
Are fight is gone.
Your asking for me back.
Im scared to take you back.
But i want you so we are going to work things out.
Just pray you can find me.
Passed out on the overpass .
When you come across me don't walk the other way.
You did this to me, you broke me.
I walk around this town like i own the streets .
I took the road of broken dreams.
I can't look back , because all i would see is my past.
I got to move on ,and i got to keep living.
When you lay your head down do you dream of me.
Because i dream of you.
Mother and Father do miss me.
Because i miss you.
Two of those line in there are lyrics to a song, by brand new
I walk a thin line between broken and repair.
Steady as i go , before i brake down right here.
Watch the tapes of when i was younger.
Two front teeth missing, and me learning as i go.
Being forced to grow up wasn't fair to me.
I haven't even reached eighteen.
The static of the tape brushes over, the smiles and laughter
Grow more distanced then ever.
Don't ever let go ,because i will fall and never return home.
I sit here all alone, with a bottle of vodka to drown my thoughts.
And the other hand holds a cigarette to in hail my mistakes.
I got a face full of tears and heart that is braking.
I lay back and watch these tapes.And just drink everything away.
I walk a think line of broken and repair.
All i do is sit is watch the clock to collect my thoughts.
I was made to chase dreams.
But never reach.
With a cry and a scream
With a smile and joy
Life was given.
Pure of the soul
A baby was born.
The suffering and the hardtack.
To hand your child away.
Into the hands of another parent.
To watch them carry on with out you there.
Your blinded by the walls.
For the family to watch them grow.
As your life Carry's on with a empty hand.
You child is growing up, faster then you would think.
Starting school and making friends.
To be growing up to live the life as a teenager.
Not long till she finds some one to settle down with.
To start a family and forget her child hood past.
You gave your child up for better reasons.
To give her life you couldn't give her.
Your heart is broken but yet repaired.
Knowing shes sleeping in the arms of a family that cares.
Just like you do.
Giving her everything she needs to grow up and be happy.
She cares for you no matter what.
No matter how many time you see her.
Or hear her voice.
Its love either way.
She calls you dad, acts like your with her.
Tells you everything that is going on.
And you play a part in her life.
And she knows you love her.
And shes happy for your sacrifice.
I wrote this for my father , Being adopted is fun yet hard.You have to familys and it puts alot on you .But knowing they love you is the best part.And knowing the reason why im adopted im very proud of my parents.
Count your blessings
Your still breathing baby.
You took it for granted , and you where left shattered.
They broke you and destroyed you.
Riped you piece by piece.
They smashed you and tasted your blood.
And they couldn't stop.
They cut you and stabbed you.
Your blood spilling like a alcoholic.
You can taste death , and you cant take it.
You want it to end , just to lay there dead.
They kick you one last time and run off.
Your losing your mind, and your rushed to the hospital.
You cant hold it back the pain is making you scream.
You should of took a different way .
You look around nerves.
I'm here but I'm disappointed.
What where you thinking ?
Now that your gone.
The pain is the only thing holding me.
The only thing i can do is lay here with tears.
There's no going back.
No last chance.
No fresh start.
No more 'love you'
No more late night calls.
No more open arms.
No more holding hands.
The kisses that made me weak at my knees.
No more breathing.
No more steady heart beat.
That plays my favorite song.
You didn't leave.
Life took you away.
The pictures that hung on my walls.
Lays smashed on the floor.
Your shirt is riped up , and the pillows smell like you.
Everything you mean to me means nothing.
Now that your gone.
There's no more tomorrow.
Lay down the fire arms.
Walk through the speeding bullets.
Lay down your fists.
And walk through the fight.
Fall into my arms,and return home.
These streets is where you will die.
If you carry on here.
Return home, i can't sleep.
You been gone for a while now.
Dope isnt what you should eat.
Come home your driving me crazy.
When i see you, your facing four walls.
I raised you better then this.
Where did i go wrong.
I can't stand this.
Lay down the fire arm.
Because your driving me crazy.
Your so close to death you can taste it.
Hun you dont need this.
I love you.
Stop this fighting.
They dont care
They will use you for your life.
This is driving me crazy.
With a touch
With a glance
To a kiss to the fake love.
To the pain to the heartbrake
The feelings the pleaser.
The heavy breath
The holding on
To the lies, With the wrong inteshons.
To a one night stand relshonship.
With questons un asked.
Summer nights are the biggest mistakes,
With every sip your saying yes.
But with a sober heart you say no.
But your drunken mind says yes to your heart tonight.
You cant take back the mistake.
Scars heal but never fade.
So breath easy girl.
This is just a mistake.
The reason why i keep writing is because of all of you, With all the support i have from you guys keep me going.Feel free to tell me what to work on , it will help a lot. And i respect your opinons.
My biggest support is from my soon to be husban. (:
And are kid is on his or her way soon , i hope .So ill be working more on my poetry i need some tips.
I need to get a couple more hundred poems to finsh my book.
And im looking for intresting topics.
So please feel free to talk about some
You call him your god.
You call him your savior.
But i refuse to look at it that way,
He might of died for us.
But i never asked him to
When i was girl i looked up to him.
But now i just look away.
You turned on me.
So i will do the same
You tooked my loved ones
Did i ever do the same?
I fail to see that i have.
So why do you do,
The pain and suffering the struggling and tears.
All i have done you never helped me,
I believed i prayed, i got on my knees
I never called you on anything, just one thing
To keep my loved ones alive, to end there suffering.
You didn't help me when i was laying in the street.
Broken , hurt, and raped you seem to ignore me.
You didn't protect me to the thugs and whores, calling after me.
To leave me bleeding and near death.
What did i ever do to deserve this.
I preached your word, spread it sea to sea
But you'll never be there
So your existence is fake.
If your so loving
If your so kind.
If your so forgiving
Then why bring the pain.
**** the word
**** the bible
Ill be on my own.
If i burn in hell let it be.
Because i never counted on you.
And ill turn my cheek.
I know allot of miss spelling to lazy to edit , will do later.
This is not to offend anyone that believes in god , first poem of god.
For only i knew
That the last time i seen you
Was when you walked out my door.
For only i knew the last words i said
Was i hate you and for you to leave
For only i knew
That the last time i got to hold you
Was a couple night before.
For only i knew the last time i felt you
Was when i smacked you.
For only i knew
That the last time i said i loved you.
Was when i watched you fall asleep.
Was the night before.
For only i knew.
That today was your last.
I would forgive you for everything.
Drop to my knees and weep.
For only i knew what your intentions were
I would tell you to stay.
If i knew you would fight that night.
I would take the bullets and the pain.
For only i knew that you die,
I would gave you my life instead.
For only i could.
Tell you goodbye one last time.