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Mujaffa
Lift a Mullah
Registered: Jan 2002
Location: In Norway .. God damitt
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The TRUE ending to "The Empire Strikes Back"
furious lightsaber duel is underway. DARTH VADER is backing LUKE SKYWALKER towards the end of the gantry. A quick move by Vader, chops off Luke's hand! It goes spinning off into the ventilation shaft. Luke backs away. He looks around, but realizes there's nowhere to go but straight down.
Darth Vader: Obi Wan never told you what happened to your father.
Luke: He told me enough! He told me you killed him!
Darth Vader: No... I am your father!
Luke: No, it's not true! It's impossible.
Darth Vader: Search your feelings... you know it to be true...
Luke: NO!
Darth Vader: Yes, it is true.. and you know what else? You know that brass droid of yours?
Luke: Threepio?
Darth Vader: Yes... Threepio... I built him... when I was 7 years old...
Luke: No...
Darth Vader: Seven years old? And what have you done? Look at yourself, no hand, no job, and couldn't even levitate your own ship out of the swamp...
Luke: I destroyed your precious Death Star!
Darth Vader: When you were 20! When I was 10, I single-handedly destroyed a Trade Federation Droid Control ship!
Luke: Well, it's not my fault...
Darth Vader: Oh, here we go... "Poor me... my father never gave me what I wanted for my birthday... boo hoo, my daddy's the Dark Lord of the Sith... waahhh wahhh!"
Luke: Shut up...
Darth Vader: You're a slacker! By the time I was you're age, I had exterminated the Jedi knights!
Luke: I used to race my T-16 through Beggar's Canyon!
Darth Vader: Oh, for the love of the Emperor... 10 years old, winner of the Boonta Eve Open... Only human to ever fly a Pod Racer... right here baby!
Luke looks down the shaft. Takes a step towards it.
Darth Vader: I was wrong... You're not my kid... I don't know whose you are, but you sure ain't mine...
Luke takes a step off the platform, hesitates, then plunges down the shaft.
Darth Vader looks after him.
Darth Vader: Get a haircut!
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Nov 30th, 2002 09:24 PM |
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FallenAngel
Junior Member
Registered: Nov 2002
Location: Argentina
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ROLF
REALLY NICE
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Dec 3rd, 2002 03:14 PM |
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finti
Senior Member
Registered: Dec 2000
Location:
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moving it to the EU section
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Dec 3rd, 2002 03:18 PM |
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Ushgarak
Paladin
Registered: Sep 2000
Location: Chelmsford, Essex, UKCo-Admin
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Yeah, that was on TFN a good long time ago... along with a very long series that took the piss out of the EU, rather chronically.
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"We've got maybe seconds before Darth Rosenberg grinds everybody into Jawa burgers and not one of you buds has the midi-chlorians to stop her!"
"You've never had any TINY bit of sex, have you?"
BtVS
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Dec 3rd, 2002 09:17 PM |
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master harmax
Senior Member
Registered: Jan 2002
Location: Bombay, India
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Bravo Mujaffa ! Truly !
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Dec 4th, 2002 03:01 AM |
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Julie
The Student
Registered: Aug 2001
Location: New Jersey
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lovely.....wonderful.....and its Boonta Eve Classic...I think
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May the force be with you
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Dec 4th, 2002 03:52 AM |
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Mujaffa
Lift a Mullah
Registered: Jan 2002
Location: In Norway .. God damitt
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thank you ..thank you
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Dec 5th, 2002 10:27 AM |
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REXXXX
Networking
Registered: Nov 2001
Location: San DiegoModerator
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I've seen variants of it, but it's still hilarious.
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Dec 8th, 2002 01:41 AM |
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Julie
The Student
Registered: Aug 2001
Location: New Jersey
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Variants of what?
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May the force be with you
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Dec 8th, 2002 02:04 AM |
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Corran
Lucifer
Registered: May 2002
Location: Look out of your Window
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I don't think it's all that funny.
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Dec 9th, 2002 07:48 AM |
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Jonny Raider
Junior Member
Registered: Mar 2005
Location: United Kingdom
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nah me neither, apart from the part about the trade federation thingy at 10 yr old, and the 'brass droid'
brass droid! lmao
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www.starwarsforum.tk
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Mar 23rd, 2005 03:28 PM |
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Sesse
Jedi Ghost
Registered: Feb 2004
Location: Finland
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Apparently...
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Mar 23rd, 2005 05:08 PM |
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Lord Banshee
Senior Member
Registered: Mar 2005
Location: Netherlands
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Lol ur right its three years old
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Mar 23rd, 2005 05:26 PM |
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Jonny Raider
Junior Member
Registered: Mar 2005
Location: United Kingdom
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wow, sorry i didn't notice, i was looking through the whoe topics in NAME ORDER to look specifically for anything about tusken radiers or sand people (same thing)...but came across this...i must of been three sheets in the wind at the time, sorry
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www.starwarsforum.tk
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Mar 23rd, 2005 09:59 PM |
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Janus Marius
Plo Koon Rulez!
Registered: Feb 2005
Location: Hiding from zombies
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Well, isn't this a bit odd. I posted this two weeks ago in Versus thread, and look who gets all the credit for it. For shame.
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Mar 24th, 2005 03:32 AM |
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