IMO it more or less boils down to an old fashioned way of asking the dad if he approves or not. The guy asking knows the dad does not actually "own" the woman. Some people actually care about the relationship with their other relatives and potential new in-laws. Certainly not me of course lol, but some.
I also would suppose it depends on how involved the father is in her life. For some people what you have is you just tend to see each other on holidays and that is it. Other families are much more involved with each other.
__________________ Chicken Boo, what's the matter with you? You don't act like the other chickens do. You wear a disguise to look like human guys, but you're not a man you're a Chicken Boo.
Essentially what I'm saying is, it's silly as hell to call it sexist because the dads no longer truly see themselves as owning their daughters. Making something out of nothing, but I do feel better now if certain people complain about what gets posted in the "Triggered" thread.
__________________ Chicken Boo, what's the matter with you? You don't act like the other chickens do. You wear a disguise to look like human guys, but you're not a man you're a Chicken Boo.
Last edited by Surtur on Sep 4th, 2017 at 12:44 PM
You didn't answer my question. Were the women I know who were proud to have this done...just brainwashed by the patriarchy?
I dunno, but I find your choice of wording quite interesting. To me to "forsake" someone or something carries negative connotations with it.
__________________ Chicken Boo, what's the matter with you? You don't act like the other chickens do. You wear a disguise to look like human guys, but you're not a man you're a Chicken Boo.
I did answer your question, you just do not like the answer. Are women who are proud to be in arranged marriages brainwashed? What about women who are proud to be in plural marriages?
Could it be that people often do not question traditions that are culturally normative? And people whose traditions you would consider unambiguously sexist would reflexively defend those traditions from criticism?
I wanted a yes or no, not excuses. I wasn't talking about arranged marriages or plural marriages lol. I gave you a specific situation and asked if they are brainwashed.
Are they? Yes or no.
__________________ Chicken Boo, what's the matter with you? You don't act like the other chickens do. You wear a disguise to look like human guys, but you're not a man you're a Chicken Boo.
Times change.. The intent now is not what it was then.
Nowadays, people aren't literally asking for permission. They're asking for approval, as the parents come part and parcel with the union and you want to start on the right foot.
Of course, kids can do whatever they want once they're of age..
__________________ What CDTM believes;
Never let anyone else define you. Don't be a jerk just to be a jerk, but if you are expressing your true inner feelings and beliefs, or at least trying to express that inner child, and everyone gets pissed off about it, never NEVER apologize for it. Let them think what they want, let them define you in their narrow little minds while they suppress every last piece of them just to keep a friend that never liked them for themselves in the first place.
Exactly, this is why I can't figure out how it sexist. It used to be sexist. It still has the potential to be, but no it is not automatically sexist.
I truly believes he feels the women who want it or are proud to have done it were brainwashed. I also get the vibe he thinks the act of a woman taking on the guys last name is also harmful or disrespectful to her own family. Which also seems to me like an old timey-ish type of attitude.
__________________ Chicken Boo, what's the matter with you? You don't act like the other chickens do. You wear a disguise to look like human guys, but you're not a man you're a Chicken Boo.
Do you even understand the concept of a FAMILY? I suppose not.
Women have rights but this doesn't imply that they aren't social beings. Many seek advice from their parents regarding these matters.
A father invests himself in the brought-up of his girl. He feels that he needs to take care of her. This is his fatherly instinct - biology factor. He is a source of guidance for his girl. He might have a say in her life-reshaping moments.
Sexist my foot.
Last edited by S_W_LeGenD on Sep 5th, 2017 at 01:41 PM
For a big city Liberal writer from a broken home with both parents cheating on each other openly, I can see how they'd label family norms "oppressive".
__________________ What CDTM believes;
Never let anyone else define you. Don't be a jerk just to be a jerk, but if you are expressing your true inner feelings and beliefs, or at least trying to express that inner child, and everyone gets pissed off about it, never NEVER apologize for it. Let them think what they want, let them define you in their narrow little minds while they suppress every last piece of them just to keep a friend that never liked them for themselves in the first place.
What you want is wholly irrelevant to me. I know you do not like my answer, because it requires you to think, and apply your same reasoning to a relevantly similar scenario, and arrive at your own conclusions. You should try it.
But the situation isn't like an arranged marriage. But okay, you have successfully dodged the question
Before you respond: Nope, that's not up for debate. If you can't give me a yes or no about the specific situation I'm asking you about, that I have asked multiple times, it's a dodge. It's irrelevant if you feel differently.
__________________ Chicken Boo, what's the matter with you? You don't act like the other chickens do. You wear a disguise to look like human guys, but you're not a man you're a Chicken Boo.
I do not care what families do. Some posters did not seem to understand that these traditions could be considered sexist, and I explained why. No more, no less.
Yet, single people somehow manage just fine in the world without someone to care for them. Having a partner to care for you is a great kindness, but it is not a need.
Again, I do not care what families do. Some posters did not seem to understand the historical basis of this tradition, and I explained it. No need to get your magic undies in a twist.
If you intend to retort with a No True Scotsman fallacy, it is better not to broadcast it.
I am fairly certain there is nothing in the biblical commandment of one to leave his or her father and mother in order to be joined to his or her spouse that allows for parents to be a party to that relationship. Hence, "leave your father and mother, and be joined to your spouse."
Mormons may do things differently, but marriage is traditionally between a husband and wife; not a husband and wife, and her father, and her mother, et al. Hence, why the approval of the parents of the bride is a great kindness, but it is not required: because the parents of the bride do not have to be married to you, she does; so ultimately, it is her decision alone, not theirs.
Hey Adam have said before you dont like women hence why you are gay. So your subject matter expertise on this topic is piss poor to straight out factually wrong and bias. Feel free to move on to another one of your pet projects where you get exposed again as a massive fraud.
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