Star Wars Humour...Pics...Jokes....Comments

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Darth Sauron
You might be a redneck jedi if.....

1. You ever heard the phrase, "May the force be with y'all."

2. Your Jedi robe is camouflage.

3. You have ever used your Light Saber to open a bottle of Bud Light.

4. At least one wing of your X-Wing is primer colored.

5. You can easily describe the taste of an Ewok.

6. You have ever had a land-speeder up on blocks in your yard.

7. The worst part of spending time on Dagobah is the dadgum skeeters.

8. Wookies are offended by your B.O.

9. You have ever used the force to get yourself another Bud Light so you didn't miss a NASCAR interview with any of the Allisons.

10. You have ever used the force in conjunction with fishing/bowling.

11. Your father has ever said to you, "Shoot, son, come on over to the dark side ... it'll be a hoot."

12. You have ever had your R2 unit use its self-defense electro-shock thingy to get the barbecue grill to light.

13. You have a confederate flag painted on the hood of your land-speeder.

14. You ever fantasized about Princess Leah wearing Daisy Duke shorts.

15. You have the doors of your X-Wing welded shut and you have to get in through the window.

16. Although you had to kill him, you kinda thought that Jabba the Hutt had a pretty good handle on how to treat his women.

17. You have a cousin who bears a strong resemblance to Chewbacca.

18. You suggested that they outfit the Millennium Falcon with a redwood deck.

19. You were the only person drinking Jack Daniels during the cantina scene.

20. If you hear: "Luke, I am your father ... and your uncle."

21. If you're wife has to ask you to get the Hyperdrive motivator out of the Bathtub.

22. If when addressing the Jedi Council you use "Bubba" for more than half of them.

Darth_Duffy
not the place for this type of thing mate

yerssot
pfff, this has been posted a million times already

where is the time we had a star wars humor forum...

Darth Sauron
It got closed down.....

Well, i apologise
Close it...

Ghetto Goblin
oooor not.

Ken Benobi
laughing laughing I like it Sauron....

El Toro
iumm, jet fighters (even in SW) don't have doors. you enter through the cockpit confused

but some are funny, like da taste of n Ewok laughing

Ghetto Goblin
go here...

http://chooseyourvoice.com/shell.php?page=VOICE&action=DISPLAY_VOICE&vid=138

Ghetto Goblin
you are a ghetto jedi if...

You ever used you light saber to clean chitterlings
The first time you felt the Force it was after you smoked a joint
You don't respect a Jedi if his macking abilities are weaker than his fighting skills
You love killing Stormtroopers because they remind you of the K.K.K.
You had reservations about killing Darth Vader because you think "he might be a brother underneath all that"
You think that the Tusken Raiders are "'bout it 'bout it"
Your Granddaddy told you what it was like to be a Jedi during Segregation
You make fun of the Jedis that can't dance
You defeated the Emperor by beating him up after you had gotten him drunk off of Gin & Juice
You'd rather "bust a cap" in someone with your laser gun instead of using your Jedi training
You ever fried or barbecued a Ton-ton, dipped in barbecue sauce or hot sauce, and served it with corn bread, greens and potato salad on the side, then washed it down with some red Kool-Aid or some Iced Tea mixed with lemonade
You give Mace Windu (Samuel Jackson's character) a high five or other black handshake when you see him
Before training a boy to be a Jedi you first show him how to be a playa
Before freeing the black woman that Jabba the Hut held hostage with a chain around her neck, you asked her for her phone number and told her that she was "phatter than a muhfuh"
Whenever you go to Endor, you have the Ewoks play some music while you freestyle or bust a rhyme
You asked Lando Calrisian (Billy Dee Williams' character) where he got his hair done
You wanted to rescue Princess Leah because you thought she was "phat"
Your mother ever told you "Boy, don't you be trying that mind trick on ME!"
You turned the Ewoks on to P-Funk
You told the Emperor that he was a "beeeiiiaaatch"
Your were more afraid of The Belt than you were of The Force when you were a child
You think that Han Solo was a "cool white boy"
You and Yoda ever passed a forty bottle back and forth
You ever beat anyone over the head with the blunt end of your light saber
You use the Jedi Mind Trick to save you when you get caught cheating on your girlfriend or boyfriend
You ever told a wookie he needs to get his hair done
You think that Lando Calrisian has good hair
You ever showed Obi Wan Kenobi how to do the Electric Slide
You where a cufi with you green, black and red Jedi robe
The Jedi Mind Trick doesn't work on your Grandmother
You ever convinced a wookie to grow dreadlocks or an afro
You think Princess Leah would look better with braids and a sun tan
You refer to Queen Amidala as Anakin's "Baby Mama"
You got kicked out of a Jedi council meeting because you were "joaning" or making wise cracks on one of the geeky Jedis
You great other Jedis with "May the force be wit' chu, playa"
You think a Jedi is weak if he has to use the mind trick to get laid
You've ever thrown down your light saber during a fight and went toe to toe with your opponent
You practice your light saber techniques "to the beat" of hip hop or other dance music
Your X-Wing fighter has the latest in stereo equipment
Your X-Wing fighter has a cooler in it that contains Red Bull, Christian Brothers, Alize, or a bottle of Vodka or Gin
When training young Annakin to fight the first thing you show him is how to use the light saber to "whip some ass"
You use the force to keep your cholestorol down because you eat a lot of soul food
You didn't want to go to the ice planet Hoth because you can't stand the cold
You ever used a light saber to curl your hair
You think that Jabba the Hut is "da man" because of all of his money and women from different parts of the galaxy
You refer to Jar-Jar Binks as "my n*gg**"
You ever used the force to choke a crackhead
Darth Vader told you "Nah Luke, I ain't your father!"

from creative brother . com

Ghetto Goblin
same place...


HILLARIOUS ADDITIONS
from Qawi:

You got a R2 Droid in the back of your '72 Caprice or Cutlass
You ever told Chewbacca to get cornrows or braids
You asked Chewbacca where he got his "weave" from
Your homie has a Millennium Falcon with tinted windows and crome landing gear
You ever used a LightSaber to jack someones LandSpeeder
You think the Dark Side of the Force is some Affirmative Action Program or on the KFC Menu
Your Protocol Droid (C3PO) is needed to translate Ebonics to English
Your peeps' have been instructed to ALWAYS tell Boba Fett (Bounty Hunter) you ain't home
You brought your LightSaber to P-Funk Party, heard the song "Flashlight", and literally "Tore the Roof Off the Sucka"
You lived in Public Housing on the Planet Tatooine
Your Protocol Droid (C3PO) can call you "My N*gga" in over 5,000languages
Lando Calrissian (Billy Dee Williams) offered you a Colt '45 (Malt Liquor) during your last Cloud City visit
You ever played Spades, Bid Whist, or Dominoes at the Creature Cantina
In 1983, when Return of the Jedi premiered, your wookie friends hadJheri Curls.
You remember when Darth Maul rapped with WuTang.
Your Jedi Robe has a FUBU or KANI logo.
Your Jedi Robe is BRIGHT ORANGE and has a FUBU or KANI Logo
You had a Light Saber Switchblade in High School
You ever traded Food Stamps for Federation Credits
Your Jedi rations consisted of Bantha fingers and Mambo Sauce
More from Cecil (Creative Brother)
You ever told Darth Morl that he "ain't sh*t"
You wear a dew-rag, scarf, or Malcolm X cap with your Jedi Robe
Your Grandmother remembers when it was "black folks" sitting in the back of a X-Wing fighter instead of "one of dem droids"
You ever used the force to pick a switch so that your aunt could spank you
You think that the term "Dark Side of The Force" is part of some racist conspiracy against the Black Man
From [email protected]:
you used The Force to look better than Shaft.
your X-wing fighter has fuzzy dice hanging from the rear viewmirror.
you use The Force to keep all of the other pimps out of your operating area.
you used your light saber to turn your afro into a fade.
you used the Jedi mind trick to win a round of the dozens.
you used The Force to help a brother get away from The Man on aN episode of COPS.

Ghetto Goblin
go here too...

http://chooseyourvoice.com/shell.php?page=VOICE&action=DISPLAY_VOICE&vid=127

Darth Ravenous
Here is one of my fav's
simple but funny

Unholly_Cheese
big grin

Ghetto Goblin
saddam is f'in fat. holy butts. he's pregnant. chop him up and make a stew.

Saddam

Calories......2746

Fat.........93g.........165%
saturated fat.....92.5g...........163.5%
sodium.........568g................276%
carbohydrates.......0g...........0%
dietary fiber........--56g(negative)........-200%(also negative)
other junk.........Ng...........N%

Darth Sauron
laughing laughing laughing out loud laughing out loud laughing laughing

Darth Sauron
One i just made stick out tongue

Jedi Priestess
Ive seen that one done another way.....did you steal that idea Sauron? laughing

Darth Sauron
No, i saw the -shut up *****- one....

And lets faceit, things are so much funnier when vaders involved...

So i went to google images, looked up 'darth vader' saw that one

Thought up the slogan to go with it

and boom stick out tongue

cavola
the shut up ***** is a good one !

did you know that prowse had a habit of over pointing in the movie

Darth Sauron
I didnt know that eek!

But pointing works for him yes

Darth Ravenous
haha heres another one not star wars but just great

Darth Ravenous
keeepin it gangsta

Ken Benobi
laughing laughing laughing out loud

Ken Benobi
Here's a quick one I made this morning....

(Was this the Real breaking point for Anakin?)

Ghetto Goblin
riiiight.

Ken Benobi
don't worry I'll have a better one, that was just a quickie big grin

Darth Sauron
http://www.georgettesworld.com/main/neeson3.jpg

"Maul, come on out and fight me, you big Sith Sissy!"

http://www.georgettesworld.com/main/mauljedi.jpg

"Darn it! Just tell me which one of you called me a
'Sith Sissy'!"

http://www.georgettesworld.com/main/mauljedi2.jpg

-- "It was me, I called you a sissy, you murdering scum!"

-- "Liar! I don't believe it! Why look at you...
you're even wearing TWO ponytails!!"

http://www.georgettesworld.com/main/mauljedi3.jpg

"Oh Yeah? PONYTAIL THIS...!!!"

http://www.georgettesworld.com/main/mauljedi4.jpg

"Ooooh did I hurt the little Jedi's feelings? Well what
are ya gonna do about it, ponytail-boy?! What?!?! Ya gonna
catch me off guard, slice me in half and send me to my
death below? I think not, Obi-WIMP Kenobi!!"





laughing Found that online, thought i should share it stick out tongue

smoker4
These are 'nt the urinals you're looking for

http://boogadave.free.fr/HUMOUR/stormtroopers.JPG

smoker4
Budweiserhttp://homepage.ntlworld.com/dave88/images/humour/sw.gif

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