Sexy Crime Fighting Duo
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Canadian Moose
In a world of crime and injustice, 2 sexy figures stand alone...ready to do battle with the forces of evil. 2 Men, whom every woman wants and every man wants to be...(and well, certain men also want to be with, but that's a WHOLE other story) 2 brave, gorgeous heroes, fighting for the weak, protecting the poor, and setting fashion trends worldwide. 2 men....Samurai Guy and Canadian Moose ....ready to protect the world against their arch enemies....ugly people....and Garden Gnomes.
They are, The Super Sexy Scottie Squad and they are here for YOU.
Samurai Guy
*Magnum Pose*
Samurai Guy!
Canadian Moose
*Blue Steele*
Canadian Moose!
Silver Stardust
Damn those garden gnomes...
silver_tears
*screams really loud and giggles* droolio
Canadian Moose
Garden Gnomes? Where? *narrows eyes, clenches jaw, in super sexy concentrating' face*
Canadian Moose
Ladies...Ladies...really...
Ooooh...a quarter...*bends over to pick it up*
Samurai Guy
I'll stop them! *Magnum*
*Gnomes stare in amazement, and explode as they cannot handle the beauty*
Tired Thins
Can I be the nerdy guy who hangs out in the back of a van with tinted windows, inventing weapons and gadgets for you guys?
Canadian Moose
Of course....your name can be like McGuyver, but we'll call you Rita for some odd reason.
Canadian Moose
Good Job Samurai Guy! Cell phone tap! *taps cell phone with Samurai Guy*
Samurai Guy
Here is a list of our Mighty Powers!
1) Well Spoken
2) Knowledgeable about everything
3) Really, really, really.... rediculously good looking. *Magnum*
4) Winning smiles
5) Can manage to change another persons hairstyle simply buy licking the tips of our fingers and kung-fooing it.
6) Chisled ab's
7) Stunning features
8) Able to withstand a fire in case of a freak gasoline fight.
9)Incredibly well dressed.
10) Great hair.
11) Superb confindence due to our being really, really, goodlooking.
Silver Tongue
Oh god....
silver_tears
*takes pics* photo
Canadian Moose
Yes...we hear that all the time...but really...we're just two ordinary men, who happen to be RIDICULOUSLY Sexy.
Silver Tongue
surrreee.....keep thinking that sweet cheeks, maybe it'll come true
Samurai Guy
You question my sexiness? HOW DARE YOU!
Canadian Moose
My sexiness is not in question here...*Blue Steele*
Samurai Guy
It's okay. You know what will make us feel better?
ORANGE MOCHA FRAPPACHINO!
Canadian Moose
You're so right.
To the Sexymobile!
Samurai Guy
*hops in the sexymobile!*
*tosses on Wake Me Up, Before you Go Go!*
*magnum*
Tired Thins
I, Rita, have invented a new weopon for you guys. It's a laser gun that you shoot at ugly people. Once it hits them, not only do they turn good looking, but they also begin meowing like a newborn kitten!
Okie, I'm Rita. Byeeeeeee for now!
*drives off in van with tinted windows*
Telperaca
LOL!!
You two...
Samurai Guy
Now it is a Super Sexy Crime Fighting Trio
Telperaca
Can I be the evil gin-i-yus?
Canadian Moose
*Ultra chic cell phones rings*
Yes? *deep frown* We'll be right there!
Quick Samurai, gun it! There's a woman on the South side wearing white.....and it's after LABOUR DAY!
Samurai Guy
Lets roll!
*throws down his Ultra Stylish shades and guns it.*
Canadian Moose
Thanks Rita. You're the best.
This will defintely help, SG...ugly people have feelings too.
Silver Stardust
Can I be the sexy female sidekick?
I'm good at kicking ass...and I love coffee
Canadian Moose
*Rides along sexilly, singing*
My best friend told me what you did last night! Left me sleeping, in my bed, I was dreaming but I should have been with you insteeeaaaaad
Canadian Moose
Hmmm....can you handle being around THIS all the time?
*Blue Steele!*
Silver Stardust
Oh, no prob.
shellie
omg...it hurts...please make it stop....laughing....this...hard....omg....
hysterical2
Samurai Guy
New Squad name....
THE SEX-MEN!
Samurai Guy
What about....this!
*MAGNUM*
Silver Stardust
Pose all you guys want, it won't bother me
Canadian Moose
hmmm...must be an eclipse.
Canadian Moose
Wow....*applauds and weeps*
Canadian Moose
but the sign on the office says...The Super Sexy Scottie Squad...
Oh well...
Samurai Guy
I'll handle that!
*gets white out*
Silver Stardust
*taps foot impatiently*
Well? Can I join, or what?
Linkalicious
First they give us Alpha Flight....
Now we have the Canadian Ambiguously Gay Duo....
Great work Canada!
Samurai Guy
You're just jealous that you are not really, really, really, rediculously Good Looking.
*Magnum*
Canadian Moose
*confers with SG*
What about the skirt? Should we let her in?
Canadian Moose
*BLUE STEELE*
*Twirl*
*BLUE STEELE! BLUE STEELE*
Samurai Guy
I dont see why not. But the K-Mart outfit must go.
*Claps, opening a secret wardobe*
Pick.
Linkalicious
you guys are great!!!
shellie
having ...uncontrolable fits of.....laughter here...
Canadian Moose
Agreed.
And something HAS to be done with that makeup and hair.
*stamps foot - bringing forth a secret beauty salon*
Pretty neat that we have all this in the Sexymobile isn't it? Or did we get out?
Silver Stardust
K-mart outfit?
Just don't do anything to my haircolor. I like being a redhead, thank you very much
Canadian Moose
*Cell Phone rings again*
*Sexyring........Sexyring......*
Moose here...
Good GOD!
*contorted features that still look sexy*
SG, Garden gnomes...at the Sexy Boutique! They're harassing the staff...!
Silver Stardust
Garden gnomes?! They must be stopped!
(and I must go take a test
stupid math class...)
Canadian Moose
No, NOT math! Save it, it will do nothing for your sexiness....which has really gone up a notch!
Samurai Guy
To the Sexymobile!
*magnum*
Samurai Guy
Indeed!
Now she needs a pose too.
Canadian Moose
.o0{where the hell WERE we}
To the Sexymobile.
*Blue Steele!*
Samurai Guy
At the Sex-Men Station.
Canadian Moose
SG...it's not a STATION! That is so....gauche....
*slaps him for his unsexiness*
Samurai Girl
oh god what is my hubby up to now
Samurai Guy
It just fix the motif so well.
Canadian Moose
I don't know what came over me. I'm sorry. *looks at himself in the mirror*
*BLUE STEELE*
It's all better now.
Samurai Girl
ooook.takes scott's coffee away from him............Moose your leading my husband astray
Canadian Moose
There is nothing ASTRAY about him dear. He's one of the SEX MEN.
*BLUE STEELE*
Samurai Guy
*Magnum*
The Sex-Men!
Samurai Girl
Scott you know i love you but i have made you an appointment to see a shrink
Canadian Moose
*snorts laughter behind his hand*
whip
Samurai Guy
I'll be back when I can.
Gotta run for a bit.
Telperaca
Do I smell that bad?
Canadian Moose
*BLUE STEELE!*
Canadian Moose
Hey Partner....looking good.
*finger gun shot at SG*
Samurai Guy
Not as good as you!
*Wink and Gun*
dave123
haha, in some thread it was me and ST. one of us had fire powers, we could set people on fire... the other had water powers. so we could have hours of fun setting people on fire, putting them out, repeat
Mr Wiggles
haha, fo sho *makes whip sound* i only read the first page, so i dont know much, but DAMN THOSE GARDEN GNOMES AND UGLY LADIES!!!!!!!
i support you 2, especially you mrs samurai guy... so, KILL THE FUGLY LADIES!... i mean, the garden gnomes
Canadian Moose
LMFAO!!! Mrs. Samurai Guy...*shaking head*
Canadian Moose
It's a draw.
*big wink and a hair straightening*
Samurai Guy
Oh, yeah! *adjusts clothing*
Mrs. Samurai Guy?
Canadian Moose
But when you're beautiful you don't NEED to use fire or water...
*BLUE STEELE*
See? shifty
Canadian Moose
*giggling hysterically*
S'ok buddy, I know who wears the pants in your relationship....
her....
Samurai Guy
It's true, but lets not make it a public event.
*Magnum*
Canadian Moose
you're right. Sorry.
*apologetic Blue Steele*
Samurai Guy
It's okay. And to show I forgive you, let's go out for....
ORANGE MOCHA FRAPPACHINO'S!
Canadian Moose
Cool.
*hip bump*
Allright my main man, I have to vacate the premises. I'll be back tomorrow and sexier than ever.
Ciao.
Samurai Guy
I'll hold down the fort.
silver_tears
* screams some more about general sexiness* droolio
Samurai Guy
Hey! Keep your pants on.
*signs an autograph*
There you go.
Tired Thins
I, Rita, have invented a new cologne for you guys! Basically, you put it on and as soon as a woman smells it, she takes her clothes off and humps your leg! I think you will find it useful in your crime fighting endeavors. Okie, I'm Rita! Byeeeee!
*drives off in white van, tinted, yeah*
Samurai Guy
Wow! Its like the Axe Effect, only to the millionth degree!
silver_tears
*passes out from being given an autograph*
Samurai Guy
Oh, damn. I killed her.
*Magnum*
Silver Tongue
Dorks
Samurai Guy
*Gaps!*
*magnum*
silver_tears
I'm gonna go stalk tom welling now droolio
Canadian Moose
Nice. Good job Rita.
I knew there was more to you than good looks.
*Applies cologne and sets off to find a woman*
Samurai Guy
Wait, Canadian Moose!
There are people in the downtown area, and they are wearing
SOCKS & SANDALS!
Canadian Moose
good GOD! *turns quickly towards stairs*
*Blue Steele*
We've got to get down there.
To the Sexyelevator.
CANADIAN MOOSE!
Samurai Guy
*Magnum*
I'll take the sexy-pole!
Canadian Moose
*stops*
That sounds soooooo bad.
*resumes sexy run to the elevator*
Samurai Guy
*Does really sexy jump onto the pole*
I know it sounded bad... that was half the point. Quick, these socks 'n' sandals fiends must be destroyed.
Canadian Moose
*door opens on the main floor. SG slides down the pole. The duo pick out the offending sock-sandal wearer like a criminal in a police line*
There! *points at the offendee* You go around to the side, and I'll come up front. Slowly though, these guys are often oblivious, and startle easily. Put on your game face partner.
*Blue Steele*
Samurai Guy
*Magnum*
Game face on, partner.
*Sneeks around to the side, hidden behind a motorcycle*
Canadian Moose
*nods*
Sir? SIR! *large man wearing tan sandals, white socks pulled up to the knees, green shorts and a hawaian shirt looks his way*
You are in direct violation of the Ugly people/Bad dresser standard, section 19B. Please move directly to the nearest bathroom where we will re-adorn you with sexy clothes.
*Man licks his lips, looks at the duo nervously, and lunges at SG*
Samurai Guy
*Magnum*
*Man stops mid-lunge, frozen*
There will be none of that, good sir. Should I float him there, CM?
Samurai Girl
Lol scott! Its Mr samurai girl....after all you took my name
Canadian Moose
Good shot SG!
Yeah...float him there. I'll get the wardrobe. *pulls off a tiny wrist transponder and pushes a button. A closet appears from the wall, with thousands of designer outfits*
Sir, this is not going to hurt at all...
*notices that due to the man's enormous girth and weight, SG is struggling with levitating the man. CM runs up beside SG and looks at the man*
I'll give you a hand SG.
*BLUE STEELE!*
Samurai Guy
Thanks! I needed a hand.
Canadian Moose
*sweat starts to pour off his face as he struggles*
Ummm...SG?
Samurai Guy
Oh, sorry. I thought you were taking over.
Canadian Moose
No no...I was merely helping you...and this guy is a little heavy...
Samurai Guy
Thats like saying the sun in kind of warm.
Canadian Moose
Speaking of which, we have tanning appointments at 3. Also, you're scheduled for a face wrap and peel, with Gretchen.
Samurai Guy
Dont you have a massage, manicure, and pedicure today with Yolanda?
Canadian Moose
Yes. This afternoon.
She's such a peach that Yolanda.
Ok...back to the task at hand...
*Moves man to the floor and snaps his fingers, changing him from frumpy to humpy*
Baylin
*Sneaks up on SG and CM, cocks legs and urinates special fugly bird magnet pheromone spray over them*
Samurai Guy
*snaps*
And new clothes and full hygene are ours!
Canadian Moose
*sniffs* Infidels. They think they can stop us...*laughs*
*gives SG the super sexy secret handshake*
Baylin
Damn those sexy soppy hero's!
silver_tears
*does some groupie things and throws a bra at the duo* droolio
Canadian Moose
*slithers over, puts an arm around her waist and stares in her eyes*
*BLUE STEELE*
you're looking beautiful today..
silver_tears
always diva
well not really, but when in the presence of the sexy duo, one must make an effort
Canadian Moose
No no, there is no effort needed on your part...you are turly one with us...
silver_tears
I feel flattered droolio
So question, how many people are part of this duo now?
Samurai Guy
A pox on their sub-par sexiness!
Canadian Moose
Well, there is only the DUO, SG and I, but we have our minions and bra flinging groupies.
Speaking of which, here is yours...is it COLD in here?
Canadian Moose
Damn straight my sexy brother...
Let's go be sexy.
Samurai Guy
But we are always sexy.
silver_tears
I didn't say it was my bra
It's just a bra
Canadian Moose
Touche!
*Blue Steele*
I'm working on a new look too...it's gonna blow you away.
Canadian Moose
Damn...
And I know it's just a bra...but without one....oh ferget it...I don't need harassment suits filed against me.
Samurai Girl
Oh god you really need help scoots
Baylin
There's so much 'camp' around here no one can see you guys for all the tents...
silver_tears
I outfoxed you Moosey
Canadian Moose
That has never happened before...
*falls into a deep depression*
Samurai Girl
I was thinking to myself if this thread cud bece any gayer! All we need is carson in here
Canadian Moose
Camp is good. It can be sexy. Why ya'll gotta hate?
Baylin
I dont hate! I'm just a dog doing dog things...
Samurai Guy
I have been practicing one... let me try it.
*LA TIGRE*
What do you think?
Canadian Moose
Whoa! *Is blown away* clap
The way you do that thing with the eyebrow...amazing.
Ok...here's mine.
*EXCALIBUR*
Samurai Guy
*pauses*
Sorry, my body had to recover from the momentary paralysis the sheer sexiness that look was. I mean.... jawdrop
Canadian Moose
It's a little rough around the lip area, but I'll get it down.
Clubbing tonight?
Samurai Guy
There is no place I would rather be.
Samurai Girl
right you two this hot chick is outta here for an hour
Canadian Moose
*Super sexy secret handshake*
Woops...the sexyphone is ringing
sexyring......sexyring....
Hello?
*hands it to SG*
It's for you.
Canadian Moose
Right-o. *salutes her sexiness, in non "I'm totally checking out your wife, dude" way.*
I'll take care of him.
Samurai Guy
Eyes off my Kool-Aid!
*takes phone*
We'll be right there.
It was your mommy. She is being attacked by.... ghetto children. They look hideous.
Canadian Moose
Dude...I'm totally sorry. I was just acknowledging it man....
Mommy? In trouble?
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