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Hey guys!I've decided to write my own version of the seventh book.It will not make any sence to you unless you've read JK's 6th book , The Half-Blood Prince.

So here I go!

Chapter One :A Pleasent Suprise

Harry sat on his bed at No. 4 Privet Drive , an empty feeling inside of him as the events of what happened a few days ago , left a horrible feeling in the pit of his stomachDumbledore was gone! , he thought gone! How could such a thing happen?what did he do to make this happen? He thought of Ginny , and how he had broken up with her.It was now two days into the summer and nothing interesting had happened.He had stayed locked up in his room all the while , his aunt passing him his food through the catflap in his door.He was sure to eat his meals to keep his strenght up for the journey he was about to take.The ministry had given all underage wizards and witches to use magic outside school,providing that any of the schools would ever open again.He had decided that he would leave a week into the holidays to visit Godrics Hollow.He wondered whether Ron and Hermione would really come.He had half-hoped they would and half-hoped that they wouldn't show up.Supposed one of them died ! he thought
Suddenly,He heard two cracks outside the house and hurried to the window pulling his wand out.He saw Ron , Hermione and Ginny standing there.apparntly Ron had apparated with out losing an eyebrow on his own while Hermione ,who was excelent at it , had Apprated with both herself and Ginny.They dived behind the bushes as they saw uncle Vernon burst through the door.Apparently,unable to find the sorce of the noise he went back into the house , muttering angrily.They saw Harry and smiled slightly up at him.It was apparent that they had all been affected buy Dumbledore's death.Ginny looked the worse , and Harry remembered , with a sinking heart , that he had broken up with her , in fear of her safety.One by one they climbed up a vine by Harry's window and Harry helped them all through.
" So you came then ,"said Harry
"of course we came Harry,"said Ginny softly.
"look , Ginny,I'm really sorry , but I had to........there was no chance of you surviveing if Voldermort Knew about us.But our special moments will forever remain in my heart,"said Harry gently looking down at her beautiful face.
Hermione looked pleased at the words Harry produced for Ginny while Ron looked slightly strange to be witnessing what was going on with his best mate and his little sister.

I know,a weird place to stop but i'm a bit tired now
so.........

How was it?

it's awsome.if u need help PM me.

no thanks,I think i'll write this one myself

"You know,Harry,maybe we should visit Gringots(sp?)"take out as much as we can and put a shrinking charm on it and bewitch it to be light,"said Hermione after a slight pause.They sat down to make plans .
"Did you guys bring anything?"asked Harry.they nodded and each took out a small trunk and a mini broomstick from thier pockets.they tapped them with their wands and their grew back to proper size.Ron had his own broom but Ginny and Hermione apparently borrowed Fred and George's broom.
"we should each carry a bottle of a glass for water.and shrink it.we could visit Madam Malkins to get extra robes.it won't be to hard to get food.We'll stop in Diagon Alley and pick up whatever we need."said Hermione.the next few days passed , with Harry and the others using magic to summon up food so that there will be enough.when the day they were leaving arrived , Ron , Hermione and Ginny got out of there blankets and Harry awoke in his bed , nervous and excited.They looked at eachother with determined looks in there faces and got out of bed . They all changed into fresh clothes , for Hermione had learned a spell which could wash and dry clothes immediately,and tought it to them.They each double checked their trunks and shrunk it , along with their brook sticks.Harry took out his invisibility cloak ans put it into his pocket and they prepared to leave for Diagon alley , and then Godric's Hollow.

Again,a weird place to stop.ho was it?

Well, it's a little "direct" in the beginnings, I'll give you that.

whats that supposed to mean?

's cood

I like it! keep it coming.... lol

^ i agree...
hey... never mind....
no still, (stupid question coming) are u gonna finish the part 6 u wrote ?

dont hit me

Originally posted by crazykim
^ i agree...
hey... never mind....
no still, (stupid question coming) are u gonna finish the part 6 u wrote ?

dont hit me

sorry , no

don't 4get about Bill's wedding.

i know , i didn't forget

auhhhhhhhh,
its ok, im happy with this one

My advice:
"Slow it down just a notch, slightly more detail. And perfect grammar, spelling, and use of paragraphs don't hurt either."

Originally posted by DarkCanadian
My advice:
"Slow it down just a notch, slightly more detail. And perfect grammar, spelling, and use of paragraphs don't hurt either."

what do you mean , slow it down?The spelling isn't that bad , is it?

Meh, spelling is pretty good, be sure to capitalize at the beginning of new sentences, but what I think Dark is trying to say is add more detail so the story doesn't move along at such a fast pace. I'll tell you what I do when I write, maybe it will improve your writing, which is very, very good anyway. It's mostly whatever parts of J.K.'s style I could pick up.

Describe to the fullest extent...
- What Harry is feeling as a reaction to someone or something, or just plain what Harry is feeling
- Other's reactions to Harry or something, for example, Hermione looked stunned when she saw Harry use an Unforgivable curse on Ron.
-After someone says something, add a little bit after that, like this. "Yea, I know," said Harry, grinning because of Ron's stunned look.
- Not important, but I noticed that J.K. uses the word 'rather' a LOT in her books. Ron looed rather nervous. Harry felt rather full after the Christmas feast. Dumbledore's face looked rather wrinkled. Stuff like that. It'll sound like J.K. in no time!

So, I hope I didn't offer too much advice, but I thought if I told you some stuff now, you would use it later on in your story. Other than that, your story looks amazing. Keep it up, it's fantastic.

so was the book good??????????? i love your sig Joelsef

Originally posted by joelsef
Meh, spelling is pretty good, be sure to capitalize at the beginning of new sentences, but what I think Dark is trying to say is add more detail so the story doesn't move along at such a fast pace. I'll tell you what I do when I write, maybe it will improve your writing, which is very, very good anyway. It's mostly whatever parts of J.K.'s style I could pick up.

Describe to the fullest extent...
- What Harry is feeling as a reaction to someone or something, or just plain what Harry is feeling
- Other's reactions to Harry or something, for example, Hermione looked stunned when she saw Harry use an Unforgivable curse on Ron.
-After someone says something, add a little bit after that, like this. "Yea, I know," said Harry, grinning because of Ron's stunned look.
- Not important, but I noticed that J.K. uses the word 'rather' a LOT in her books. Ron looed rather nervous. Harry felt rather full after the Christmas feast. Dumbledore's face looked rather wrinkled. Stuff like that. It'll sound like J.K. in no time!

So, I hope I didn't offer too much advice, but I thought if I told you some stuff now, you would use it later on in your story. Other than that, your story looks amazing. Keep it up, it's fantastic.

thanks for the advise , it'll help alot. and no , you didn't offer to much advise.

haha thanks yurs is great too

glad you will find it useful Hermione202. write more soon!

ok.I'll write tonight or tomorrow.

I've already planned what will happen in my story.Ex. who will die.

i'll give you guys one clue of what will happen in my story:

alot of people on the good side will die in my version

oh ok well i love it so far! its great post more soon!

i have read your story and it is great i love it keep on going.

u gunna post 2day?

please not some1 from the trio
when r u gonna post more?
2day?

Thanks .
sorry i'm taking so long but i want to plan what i write beforehand. Alot of it i might make up on the spot but i want to plan some of it.i'll post more soon .i'm going to take my time with this story. Originally posted by crazykim
please not some1 from the trio
when r u gonna post more?
2day?

hhhmmm...........can't say yes , can't say no . it'll just spoil the story

its amazing .
plz rite more

clap very good

when are u posting more?

damn! I just posted alot and i lost it! anyways , i'll try and post it back soon

k

You don't write them up in a word doc and then paste them here, do you?

no , i don't .

Ahh, okay then. That's usually what I do with my stories, the word doc copy-paste thing. Allows me work on it.

Thanks!
Ok , a little more now .

Ginny and Ron were to summon up The Knight Bus while Harry and Hermione hide umder the invisibily cloak. Around lunch time , they left Privet Drive and Ginnystuck out her hand so the the Knight bus would come.Sure enough , a few seconds later , she jumped back in alarm as it sped towards them.A new conductor , Reeves Buddha stepped out .Ron stalled as he pretended to have lost his money , and Harry and Hermione sneaked in . Fortunately , they found four seats together."The Leaky Cauldron , London . And we'll pay extra to go there immediately."said Ginny told Reeves.
"All right Then ," Reeves agreed . Harry and Hermione held on to there seats , ao as not to be thrown off when the buss stopped and be seen.Harry only just managed to hold on but Hermione was about to be thrown forward when Harry Grabbed on to her.She blushed and they got up to leave.
They got up with Ginny and Ron , left The Knight Bus.They entered the leaky couldron and went straight to Diagon Alley.WHen they were sure no one was watching Harry and Hermione took off the invisibily cloak.Harry was glad to see that one thing hadn't changed because of Vlodermort ; Diagon Alley was packed with people . They headed towards Gringots(sp?) to fill up their money bags.


How was it? I am sorry for taking so long to write but like i said , i am trying plan some of it before i post , thought most of it i waill make up on the spot as i am typing. Hope you guys liked it.I will post as soon as i can , I promise Anyways , comments please!

it is going a little fast , but its great

more tomorrow

k

I know its going fast , but i will try to improve .

Originally posted by Hermione202
more tomorrow , i am a disappointment aren't I ? Oh , and in the last post i made , i gave you guys a HUGE clue . I'm surprised if no one noticed it .(If you did see it , I am asking you to please not tell anyone .

More now!

They came out a few minutes later , having taken out a much money as they could carry , and bewiched it to be lighter . Next they went to Madame Malkins and bought themselves some new robes . After they had gotten all they needed , they prepeared to go to Godrics Hollow .

Some more later .

how was it ?

I think the story is great. I still haven't figured out the clue. I'm not good at spotting things...even if they are obvious.

i think i figured out the clue, and if it is what i think it is, thnk u so much its exactly how i wanted it....


and its great
hope u can post soon

Originally posted by crazykim
i think i figured out the clue, and if it is what i think it is, thnk u so much its exactly how i wanted it....


and its great
hope u can post soon

wrong clue..........nothing to do with relationships........

It is great.Keep on posting

i saw harry potter once...ddnt rlly lyke it...but ne way...hermoine is startin to look good...

What ?

huh. relatoinships? what no, thats not the clue, huh?, whatever...

Sorry guys . i haven't posted for a long time . Every time i sit down to write this story , i get writers block . I know what i want to write , but i can't seem to put it into words . I'll post when i stop getting writers block .

By the way , i came up with two titles . Tell me which one you find sounds better :
1) Harry Potter and The Tower of Torture ( I personally prefer this one .)
or 2) Harry Potter and the Tower of Terror

tell me which one you prefer

Originally posted by Darth Cytoza
i saw harry potter once...ddnt rlly lyke it...but ne way...hermoine is startin to look good...

Noobs.... (Hypocrite, I know)

Tower of Torture sounds about right

i have a feeling i know what the clue is....but i might just be reading too much into it...w/e...it's going good

A little more now and a cover for my book : made by MerMorgan

http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b88/goodgirl202/TowerOfTorture.jpg

"Harry , do you know how we're getting to Godrics Hollow ? " asked Ron
"Well...."in truth , he wasn't sure how they were going to get there .
"I do, " said Hermione quietly . Everyone looked at her . "I remember reading something about it . There's a certain spell you have to say .You have to either be from Gryffindor , or on a certain list of people allowed in . Its very protected but the enchantments can be broken by very dark , very powerful magic . Not many can accomplish that kind of magic . It takes alot of determination and power. Few people are known to have done so , " Hermione finished , her voice barely above a whisper .
"Voldermort," said Harry and Ginny together .
"Exactly," agreed Hermione.
"So do you remember the spell to get us in?" asked Harry .
"I think so...." She bit her lip nervously . " Oh , I don't Know ! " she cried in frustration.
"Great Hermione ! you can remember homework , but not this ?" shouted ROn exasperatedly .
" Ron ! " exclained Ginny angrily . Hermione looked close to tears while Harry shifted akwardly in the backround .

Not much but.....a more later .

How did you like to cover ?

i just have one word for you and Morgan...BRILLIANT!!!

Originally posted by Saratn
i just have one word for you and Morgan...BRILLIANT!!!

Thanks Saratn !

Umm....i'm a bit confused......why do you have to be a Griffindor or whatever to get to Godrics Hollow? i just though it was a street with muggles living there too. But i might be wrong, but i'm not sure so....yeah. I'm done now.

Me like the story though! it's hot! bit more detail will make me happy!

What is the clue?!?!?! i got to know!
lol, please continue.

The clue is to important to tell you . Look up what a 'hollow' is , and you'll find your answer . Also , take a look at what JKR said about Godric's Hollow on her website , www.jkrowling.com . you'll find you answers there . Observe the name more carefully to . I'll become more clear a little later in the story .

it relly good. do moooooooooooooooooooooooooore

Hermione being her usual mysterious self...making people figure out things...either that i am too lazy to figure out the clue...so i will wait...

Originally posted by Saratn
Hermione being her usual mysterious self...making people figure out things...either that i am too lazy to figure out the clue...so i will wait...

The you'll have to wait a year or two . .

fine by me...i'm not going anywhere anytime soon...

lol .

this is really good... and who the heck said that he/she hates it?

i dunno......i saw that vote . well...its why i put up a poll. I'll write more when i go home . i'm at a intermet cafe . i'm on holidays right now .

cool, where?

Hey, I just read your story and It is really good. Keep it up. One thing though, as others have commented. You might be moving a little to fast, with all the open ends that Rowling left in her book. If you have ideas plannes out, I don't want to try to change, so just keep going.

come on write more. u havn't whritten in a while

I know . I have many ideas but its all jumbled up in my head Sorry .

thats understandable

hey, im new to this thread but i just read the story and it was really good, so keep it up

your story is really good. Continue writing. pleeeeeez!

yeah what she said

U have not written from a long time. When r u going to write?

Rather post

she has ideas now, she is just trying to figure out how to get them to work.

wen u posting more

Soon...I hope . I'm so sorry for not writing for such a long time . It has been months now and I hope to post more soon.

I LOVE IT

please go on!

I just read your story and its really good write more.

plssss write more.... i' expecting next week maybe?

Hermione has been busy, and i don't know when she's coming on...

wish she post soon

I really am liking this. Could use more detail, but apart from that its perfect.

postpostpostpostpostpostpostpost

please post soon.

post post post post post post post post post post post post

has she givin up cause i just read this story and its absoulutly great

is any1 else bothring to check this... has she given up??

Nope, I haven't given up. But i think I'll PM Rex to close this thread and start it over. I changed the plot line...

Originally posted by Hermione202
Nope, I haven't given up. But i think I'll PM Rex to close this thread and start it over. I changed the plot line...
Holy Sh!t, Heres a woman who hasn't been on Forever....

Always liked your Input on thing...

r u eva gonna continue, coz i dun really wanna read it until i noe dat u're writing regularly

Originally posted by Barker
Holy Sh!t, Heres a woman who hasn't been on Forever....

Always liked your Input on thing...

I'll PM Rex in a week or so, to close this thread so i could start it over. like i said in the last post, there's a major change in the plot line.

Closed by request.