*Hercules walks up to Deadpool wishing to enter the Tavern*
Herc: Great Hercules doth wish to fill his belly with mead and ale this day. Please allow me to enter good sir.
DP: Um...herc ol buddy I've been told by management that after last
time I'm not allowed to let you in...................
*Pan to just inside the doorway and we see Herc hands on his Hip looking at the bar*
Herc: Is a great smell this Tavern filled of Alcohol and bodily odors a plenty.
*Herc walks away from towards the counter. We see Deadpool in the background tied up and strung from the roof by his own intestine*
*Herc takes a seat at the bar next to Superman*
Herc: The son of Zeus demands to be liberated from his sanity. Give me much to consume great stretchy bartender.
*Reed Gives Herc the Usual ton of pure Alcohol. Herc begins to drink his belly's worth and bragging about his unmatchable strength*
Superman interrupts: So your really strong are you. What else can you do?
Herc: Nothing but trust me with strength like mine nothing else is needed my spandex wearing friend
Superman: so exactly how strong are you?
Herc: You ask me of strength doth Hercules possess. My friend I have matched Thor in arm wrestling . So strong was our force the very planet shook beneath us.
Superman: I could do that what else have you done.
Herc: What else has has Mighty Hercules done you ask. Well on these broad shoulders did rest the weight of the entire planet Earth. Great it was but not nothing compared to the Prince of Powers unwavering strength.
*Batman who has been sitting on the other side of Hercules, who oddly enough no one noticed, chimes in*
Bats: I find it hard to believe that you held the entire planet on your back.
Herc: You dare call the mightiest of Olympians a liar. Pray tell why you doth declare Hercule's claims false
Bats: Its just that if you do not possess the power of flight I don't see how you could brace a free floating object with nothing to stand all.
Herc(Smiles and points at Batman): Ah very astute you are my shadowy little rodent friend. And right you are but great Hercules has your answer and shall reveal to you a part of the story normally not told. You see Great Hercules knew he needed something on which to brace his mighty feet. So I didth think of a way to do such a thing. then I with legs that can crush Minotaurs jump to Mars in search of intelligent life. There Hercules did find what he did search for. Green Men who could help great Hercules combat his problem. It was then with arms Zeus has blessed me with that Hercules strongest of all the immortals began to rend the very heads off their bodies.
Batman: wait you started to KILL THEM?
Herc: Yes my oddly dressed friend. Hercules did try as hard as he might but sadly for every ripped away a new one would spring worth from their barren shoulders as if a weed was there. For centuries the ripping of heads did continue as I hoped that the renewing of heads wasn't permanent. Ah but crafty Hercules did notice something unique. As Hercules had to relieve himself I urinated on one of them. The Green Creature beneath me did began to seizure when visited upon the Blessed Golden Liquid from my Godly Bowls. It then died to Hercules great pleasure. Although the much of Hercules powerful urine would be needed to kill advanced race. So it was then I drank all the water from Planet Mars and thrusting upward with Great Hercule's most formidable weapon did I release a Golden Foul Smelling rain upon the surface of the world. It was then I most beloved of Zeus hurled their bodies to the moon. Bracing Hercule's mighty legs upon their rotting corpses which stressed to Earth's Surface I braced the planet upon the greatest of all should.....
Bats interrupts: YOU KILLED THEM ALLLLLLLLL!!!!!!
Herc: Nay my good friend I came to enjoy the company of one such creature. Unlike his fellow brethren this creature did not hit on Hercules trying to seduce me into Bed. I named him Jonn the Martian Manhunter and thus protected him by securing him into Hercules most sacred hole to shield him from the Death of his people.
*Batman looks over to Martian Manhunter who sitting at a table drinking from a mug*
MM: What he says is true Batman. This simple minded brute did destroy our water supply and kill all my people.
Batman: Where did he put you and why did he save you.
MM: He saved me because he said I reminded him of his dog. And he saved me by stuffing me into his @$$ cavity.
Flash randomly interrupts: Is that why your so Anal.
*Flash Runs off*
Batman: So why didn't you just fry his mind?
Jonn: Because every time we did we kept getting a blank like nothing was there.
Herc: Tis true my shadowy friend Mighty Hercules doth not concern himself with matters of the mind. I only care for Matters of the muscle. Now drink up my boy loving friend. Now is the time to drink and feast.
cool pic.... Santa looks really bad ass... he looks like he could kick Thor's ass...
