Fresh Start

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Lara
Well I guess I killed my other thread lol.
Time to start over.....


Such a gift!
A precious gift, born out of such grief.
How can something so perfect and pure,
Come from something so saturated in deceit?

Never mind the past,
may it never taint you.
Here I am and will always be.
When ever, what ever your need.

May they never get the chance,
May they never see the opportunity,
To harm and abuse you,
As they did me.

This I pledge, my sweet sweet cherub,
For you there is no request too extreme.
For now I see the future,
I am redeemed.

MrCampion
Astounding workmanship of words and depth, Lara!

Lara
Watching you as you sleep,
Feeling your skin against mine,
I am absolved,
I am revived.

What I gave so willingly the first time round,
Now I see, was foolish.
It was acknowledged and abused.
I was manipulated and used.

Now here with you I feel so much more!
Your deserving of what I have to give.
You give so much yourself,
And of that I'm unworthy.

In the darkness, tucked in your embrase,
I know I'm here in the right place.
And if I get lost I know you'll find me,
There is no one else I'd want to be with.

MrCampion
A truly gifted poet.

Lara
Back to the earth,
Down I slump.
An abused and battered mess,
Bruised and bitter, sobbing again.
The sinking feeling my mistress.

I feel the darkness surrounding me,
Closing me in.
It calls me out, withdrawing me,
Reminding me, I've always been less.
And with this affirmation I know she walks again.

Lonely, black and frozen.
Blue in mind and heart.
So fulfilled with the company of dispare,
sickend to the pitt.
Stomach churns and nightmares stir,
The nonsense in her head.

In with the tide that just keeps coming,
Just letting it roll over head.
No urge to fight, to swim for air.
Closed eyes calling upon death.

Lara
Starring down the barrel,
Cut off from the other side.
Hiding in the shadows,
Away from your lies.

Fury's clutches, strong and firm,
Thoughts reeling, blood rushing.
Through pushing you'll learn,
As its you I start crushing.

Torrid lies and filthy looks,
Screaming, I'm not heard.
Frustration leaking tears,
My vision blurred.

Again and again I heard your sighs,
Sinking me lower each time.
Ignoring your taunts,
Trying to take what is mine.

~Forever*Alone~
you spelled embrace wrong. i dont care.

its good, i like your style, it feels different.
im sorry i cant concentrate right now, i felt i owed you, but i am not being very helpful. perhaps in the near future i could come back.

Lara
havent written in a while but I'm working on it big grin

Lara
Ah! well I knew I'd get there at some point laughing out loud
this is quite a bad piece but its a start big grin

thanks to:PoB

We stand alone,
Only responsible for ourselves.
We stand alone,
Empty and hollow shells.

We rely on others,
For truth and validation.
We rely on others,
For love and consolidation.

We vent,
To release what we cannot contain.
Hate, hurt, rage and pain.
We vent.

Self-destructive, we are,
An island, each standing alone.
Forcing for the painless isolation and numbness.
Man cannot live by bread alone.

vivando-loca
i really like the first four. i love how you have words that normally would't been thrown together in a rhyming scheme, but they somehow work...

'tis quite brilliant.

the last one's okay, but definetly not your best (of what i've read).

Lara
aw thankyou, yeah I kow it kinda sucks but I havent written for so long, I need to ease myself back into it slowly if you know what I mean laughing out loud

I have another thread here too, its old but I've posted loads there. I stopped posting there as it has a rep for being very morbid so if you're in the mood for that sort of thing feel free to browse big grin
http://www.killermovies.com/forums/f83/t330335.html

thanks again :d

vivando-loca
god i know that feeling. ^.^

you're welcome, and sure i'll check out your other stuff. if it's as good as the first four, i should be very entertained, to say the least.

plus morbid doesn't really bother me that much, lolz. smile

Lara
I'm working on a few at the moment but I'm not sure what the outcome will be and I'm O-so not impressed with myself at the moment so I apologise, for me even these are bad!!! messed

Lara
across my little red note book, and I found a wealth of stuff I'd written in it and forgotten about so I'll post some of those instead big grin


At 17 the world made you it's victim,
Chewed you up and spat you out.
Not once did you fight back, no!
You just drank it all in.

You drank until you were saturated,
The vemon, poisoned you deep.
The vessel, so potent,
Left you concentrated.

Some where deep within,
You found the antidote,
Dose after dose,
Time the great healer.

20 now, but still healing,
Trying to forget.

Lara
Drawn back you,
after finally breaking free,
after doing all I could to forget,
to remove you from memory's view.

Now your back, drawing me down,
Haunting my dreamless sleep,
Raping me still,
Body and mind.


Sauded affliction,
you infect me still,
unbind me, remedy me,
You'll never permit it!
You'll never quit,
Until I'm as diseased as you!
PARASITE!

Crippling me, undying pain,
All the more soul destroying to see,
The sick smile on your face,
The twisted ways you enjoy me.

PARASITE!

you'll never let me go,
Your manipulation never faulters,
Can you see where your poison spreads?

PARASITE!!

Sauded affliction,
Infecting me still,
Your manipulation never faulters,
The twised ways you enjoy me.

PARASITE! PARASITE! PARASITE!

The sick smile on your face,
My undying pain,
Your twisted enjoyment,
You'll never let me go.

PARASITE!!!!

Jedireaper
A little strange but cool, good work, I like the first on of the two newbies! x

Lara

Jedireaper
Wow!

Jedireaper
For Lara, and our Dying World

In your poem's I see truth,
As if the very foundations of life,
Could be so easily described.

In you words I find your emotions,
The way you feel when you put to words,
The wrongness of ur world.

I understand this world we live in,
I can see it, hear it, smell it, fear it, hide from it,
Nothing but dark corners of dark street.

Suffering and misery,
Our world is lost,
Gone; its dark bloody trail but a wishfully fogotten memory.

How in our short time on this Earth we have brought the planet to destruction,
What with drugs, pollution, lies, dispear, deciet, jealously,
All things must come to an end.

So if I say good night,
It will mean my parting from this world,
I leave behind this message.

Inspiried by your poems, Lara.

laughing out loud

Lara
Wow, thankyou Reaper big grin


Take these thoughts,
Break them down.
Still the equation,
Equals a frown.
Nothing more,
Nothing less.
What is this before you?
A wretched mess!
Take me away,
Bring me peace.
A holiday of sorts,
Some temporary release.
Give me some silence,
Deafen my ears.
Bind my eyes,
Wind back the years.
Back to the begining.
Where it all began,
When you should have explained to me,
This life and its horrid plan.

Jedireaper
cool

We Cry

The tears we weap
Are a testimate to our world.
Just like me when I cry myself to sleep
And I just need to be held.

I call out for a friend,
But only those who call out themselves reply,
Is this really how it all ends,
With our world a place of ignorance, decption, and lies?

We have devestated our existance beyond saving,
I don't know why ae bother anymore
Because human destiny is no-longer paving
The way forward into this world without law.

Like every night,
The police sirens that whale in the streets,
Has someone died a bloody fight?
It's something I wish never to meet.

As we cry ourselves to dream
Our escapes from grim reality,
Everything is not as it seems
As you my be the next fatality.

We cry.

-Kevin Traynor

Depressing I know, I'm really depressed at the moment! giljotiini

Lara
your not the only one I had some bad news at the weekend.

Jedireaper
Whats up? Oh and your bday... its tomorrow I think? Well that was your present from me... Happy birthday! Also I have posted two more parts to my Nexus story...

big grin big grin big grin laughing big grin big grin big grin

Lara
not some thing I wish to disguss in an open forum.

aw thankyou sweetie, yeah its tomo, kinda tainted now tho.

Jedireaper
PM me! ;?

Lara
damn! I just cant write at the moment. sad

Lara

Deja~vu
Oh now I found your poetry site! This last one was deep....kinda like life.......and yep, it is said we should write about true or real things to make them impressive an feeling.

Great Job!

Deja~vu
Blankets.

We are always with you.
We know you.

We are your comfort, feel us.
We are with all the souls torn.

Apart............like a cup emptied in the desert............it is left for the filling..........

As you lie down, our breath fills your room.
Our breath takes you too your destinies.........

Just see them...
Just see them...
Just see them...


Just feel it and know it is it your destiny.

Lara
hug

Lara
Another old one:


Welcome to my secret garden,
Come lie with me.
We'll dream together,
Under the silvery white moon.

Come with me, we'll laugh,
I'll sing in the moon-lit lake.
COme with me Take my hand,
Together we'll explore.

Sit with me,
I'll listen to your secrets.
Watching the spark in your eyes,
Come, show me your depth.

Here in my secret garden,
Alone, together, safe.
Here you'll always find me,
In my secret hiding place.

Deja~vu
^^ good too..nice...feeling and real.


Originally posted by Jedireaper
cool

We Cry

The tears we weap
Are a testimate to our world.
Just like me when I cry myself to sleep
And I just need to be held.

I call out for a friend,
But only those who call out themselves reply,
Is this really how it all ends,
With our world a place of ignorance, decption, and lies?

We have devestated our existance beyond saving,
I don't know why ae bother anymore
Because human destiny is no-longer paving
The way forward into this world without law.

Like every night,
The police sirens that whale in the streets,
Has someone died a bloody fight?
It's something I wish never to meet.

As we cry ourselves to dream
Our escapes from grim reality,
Everything is not as it seems
As you my be the next fatality.

We cry.

-Kevin Traynor

Depressing I know, I'm really depressed at the moment! giljotiini I think this is excellent! Nice view of the world and consciousness....great stuff.

Lara

Lara

Lara
this is a little prayer my cousin says when shes out in the care I thought it was quite cute:

Mother, Goddess,
Lift your face,
And find for me,
A parking space

XvampbenjiiX666
amazing...great poetry. never read anything like it before

Lara
Thanks Benji big grin

I like yours too, I just dont understand why some people cant look past faith, religion etc. They just make themselves look like arse's. I got no proplem with you, your faith is your business. smile

XvampbenjiiX666
thanks...thats 3 on here and the rest...never mind

Lara
dont worry I've spoken with ush and WD seems to be aware of the problem too judging from your insult thread in the OTF, which got closed. I dont understand why the other mods havent picked up on it yet. messed

XvampbenjiiX666
its ok...im just glad i have some frineds around here

XvampbenjiiX666
...i hate being tired..i cant spell. i meant to say friends...oh and if something happnes here because of me im sorry

Because I can
Jeez Lara, wanna be any better?
big grin

Lara
laughing out loud thankyou.

XvampbenjiiX666
i lvoe these poems...now i know a great poet...sweetness

Lara
laughing out loud such a silly inside joke but really tickled me. thankyou guys.

I'm not that great.

XvampbenjiiX666
yes you are...

Lara
If I was that good I would have been published by now istead I have to do it myself on the tinternet laughing out loud but thankyou its always nice to know I've moved some one with my work.

XvampbenjiiX666
hehehe...your very welcome

Lara
I found some old stuff which I hadnt collated with the rest of my poetry when I was going through all my old college art work. I'll post it at some point I'm sure, sorry nothing new at the moment.

XvampbenjiiX666
cant wait to read them

Jedireaper
Yaaay! Good poetry, waay better than mine...

Lara
When I can find them messed I;ve lost them again *miffed*

Jedireaper
Huh?

Lara
I have bad habit of lossing things, finding them yonks laters and then lossing them again shortly after finding them. I think the fairies have a conspiracy against me! eek!

XvampbenjiiX666
thats not good

Lara
laughing out loud they are in my room some where I just need to find them

Jedireaper
he fairies? Or the things you lost?

Lara
laughing out loud both I guess.

Jedireaper
lol

Lara

carnage52
wow you kick my ass at poetry.and quick question if that is you in that picture will you marry me? rolling on floor laughing

Lara
big grin thanks, I'm glad you like it.

what pic? my avatar? confused

carnage52
Originally posted by Lara
big grin thanks, I'm glad you like it.

what pic? my avatar? confused awww yeaaaa smokin'

Lara
no thats not me but I do look quite similar and I do have black hair and green eyes with the pale skin laughing out loud

the skin and eyes are natural gifts the hair, well I'm naturally a blonde so it comes from a bottle. laughing out loud

carnage52
Originally posted by Lara
no thats not me but I do look quite similar and I do have black hair and green eyes with the pale skin laughing out loud

the skin and eyes are natural gifts the hair, well I'm naturally a blonde so it comes from a bottle. laughing out loud awww yeaaa

Lara
laughing out loud keep dreaming boy-o I'm nearly 23.

carnage52
Originally posted by Lara
laughing out loud keep dreaming boy-o I'm nearly 23. sad

Lara
laughing out loud whats the sad look for, hun?

carnage52
Originally posted by Lara
laughing out loud whats the sad look for, hun? that i am to young. sad

Lara
aw. cant help that sweetie *hugs*

XvampbenjiiX666
Originally posted by Lara
aw. cant help that sweetie *hugs* LARA!!!!!!!!!!!! ...marry me XD hows it going beautiful?

Lara
DAMN!!! Benji, where the hell have you been? I missed you.

PM me you monkey I wanna know whats been happening. *Hugs*

XvampbenjiiX666
Originally posted by Lara
DAMN!!! Benji, where the hell have you been? I missed you.

PM me you monkey I wanna know whats been happening. *Hugs* hey beautiful...i missed you too. your only a few years older..wanna give me a try? i'm mature..at times

Bardock42
Originally posted by XvampbenjiiX666
hey beautiful...i missed you too. your only a few years older..wanna give me a try? i'm mature..at times Aren't you in a relationship?

XvampbenjiiX666
Originally posted by Bardock42
Aren't you in a relationship? one: i was just kidding...i believe Lara has someone. if she doesn't, more power to me
two: not really
three: why?

Bardock42
Just wondering. What happened with Dangerous Beauty.

Lara
laughing out loud

Ya Krunk'd Floo
keel.

Lara
pardon moi!?

XvampbenjiiX666
i belive i found a way back to here

Bardock42
So...what happened with Dangerous Beauty?

Lara
I guess that question will just have to be cast in to the abyss.

I'm working on some stuff right know I'm hoping I will bring myself back up to my former shadowed greatness. I'll keep you posted.

Benji!!!!! Damn it Bi*ch!! Mail me!!! big grin

Lara
Thoughts 05/11/09

Winding wires of thought interlaced,
Jumbled and coiling,
Filling every crevice,
Every space.

Uncontrolled current of its own ebb and flow
Flooding through fast,
Or creeping up slow,
Never ever ceasing, .

Unpiloted, destination unknown,
Clouded and obscue,
Until lightning strikes in a corner of your mind,
And its apparently clear, you're no longer blind.

Circling round and round,
Frantic but yet well formed
Thoughts sparking, winding.
Defining who you are.


Just a little ditty for you I dont have any master pieces yet lol

XvampbenjiiX666
i sent you my email in a message so you email me XP by the way nice poem...hopefully this will be my last time on this site

XvampbenjiiX666
hey i have a new poem up...i might be using the site more like i used to

Lara
14/09/11 1.50am

Flesh stripped away, bones laid bare.
Bleaching in the scolding sun, diminished by the air.
I'm quite, calmly waiting, as the sparks begin to fall.
Everything you said to me! it means nothing now, nothing at all.

cast up into the air, now, the truth will fall like lead.
Everything that I once new has been cut down, now its dead.
Leaving in its wake a hollow voided space,
my memories no longer valid, my identity misplaced.

So much for being honest, for never having lied!
You've lied through your back teeth to me.
How can you be surprised? 25 years and not a single word!
Would it have hurt you that much?

If, in the eyes of a child mother is God, are my eyes deceiving me?
Mother, dearest mother! What have you done!?
I did nothing to deserve this, am I not the loyal one?
Loving, caring, Obedient? Honest, reliable, true?

What will become of us now I do not know.
however the buck stops here and its time for the truth.
my situation is still the same as it ever was, but different for you.
Redeem yourself if you can. open the vault.

Jedireaper
Welcome back!

Lara
lol thank you. *bows*

Jedireaper
We've both been away for some time.

Lara
Indeed we have.

Jedireaper
Welcome back again. :P

Lara
Likewise. kev

Lara
Burned and blistered
broken and torn
waring within myself
mourning snd forelorn

emptiness, the void
tears of guilty remorse
fighting the dire consequences
of my bitter discourse

raging and running
scars without and within
distortion fogs up my reflection
another bloody tissue in the bin

little girl lost
no where else to run
one look at myself
I come undone

Back to the beginning
with my sorry, broken arse
the cycle now finished
looped, set to rerun

Jedireaper
If only life was a Sky+ Box and you could pause and rewind- Deep words.

XvampbenjiiX666
Deep. Not sure if I should like it or not...ok I do.

Lara
Nothing like hitting your own self destruct button without realising.

Jedireaper
Especially when you hit the wrong button. I am really out of touch at the moment. Always here for ya Lara as I have been the past 4 years.

XvampbenjiiX666
Here for you as well.

The Blue Widow
Great poems here Lara! Lucky I found this site, but it looks rather dead...

Burned and Blistered?
Space is cold,
War with self,
Rampage untold.

Emptiness, The Void,
Did answer,
"LARA JUST GO BE A DANCER!"
"What me?! No way ill bare for tips, my sinuous form or shake my hips!"

:P cheer up!

Lara
erm...............:s

Jedireaper
An interesting return to form for Lara, her use of full stops is astounding!

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