"OHMAGAD, it's sucks to be me!"

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Bouboumaster
Where would you want to be the least?

1- Tied on a chair, with the Jocker approching, with a knife, smiling?

2- Tied on a chair, with the Punisher approching, with a knife, accusing you to be a pedophilia?

3- In front of Hulk in his "World War Mode"

4- In a game of chicken with Juggernaut

5- In a torture chamber of Doom, who think that you know the secret to bring down Richards

6- In front of Darkseid, who think that you are the key for the ALE

7- In you living room, with Superman prime paying you a visit

8- In a middle of a hug between Human Torch and Nova, herald of Galactus, newly resurrected

Mindset
Hulk doesn't kill people angel

Sirius77
6

HueyFreeman
1

MightyEInherjar
7, because I f*cking HATE emos in my house.

Inhuman
9. Tied up in the bottom(under toilet) of a portable potty. And The blob is approaching from an all you can eat buffet fest.

10. Caught by batman in his batcave by surprise wearing nothing but a small speedo. shifty

11. Caught by Thanos banging death in his bed.

12. Tied to a chair with a looped video playing of you pissing on the american flag wearing a hitler costume & decapitating bucky terroist style. With Captain America apraoching.

spetznaz
Originally posted by Bouboumaster
Where would you want to be the least?

1- Tied on a chair, with the Jocker approching, with a knife, smiling?

2- Tied on a chair, with the Punisher approching, with a knife, accusing you to be a pedophilia?

3- In front of Hulk in his "World War Mode"

4- In a game of chicken with Juggernaut

5- In a torture chamber of Doom, who think that you know the secret to bring down Richards

6- In front of Darkseid, who think that you are the key for the ALE

7- In you living room, with Superman prime paying you a visit

8- In a middle of a hug between Human Torch and Nova, herald of Galactus, newly resurrected

In all of the above the fact is you are going to die, and in several of them rather gruesome deaths. The question though is ....which will give you the most physical pain for the longest time (a), and (b) what will make you the most f'ed up!



That automatically takes out the Hulk and the Juggernaut (their level of strength means that even if they rip you in two, you will expire so fast it will be the same as being mangled in a particularly bad accident - you'll only feel it for a few seconds at most).

Same thing for Superman Prime (if he kills you it will be quick, if he rips your arm off the shock to your system will make you numbed for quite a while, and by that time you will have bled to death ....and if he sears the wound with heat vision to make it not bleed, the pain levels are still endurable - believe it or not. Bush amputations have taken place throughout human history, and in some places still do)

A hug between two flaming beings = quick death. Painful, but it will be brief.

Whcih leaves Darkseid, Doom, Punisher and Joker.

The Punisher is brutal, but efficient. As a pedophile he will simply slice off your (you know what), stuff them in your mouth, and then kill you. By the way, having those chopped off is not as painful as it may appear (having them crushed is far more painful), and just the other day I read of a person who had his entire genitilia chopped off by a mob. He survived. Also think of the eunuchs of old who had their 'stuff' taken out.

That leaves the Joker, Doom and Darkseid.

Now, Doom and Darkseid will make you feel pain you have never experienced or even thought possible. Doom with his evil mind and science (and maybe a spot of magic to make your pain receivers work over 100%), and Darkseid with his telepathy and omega beams (unless you just watch cartoons, the omega effect can do far more than just blast things ....it ranges from teleportation to making swiss cheese). Both characters will make you feel things that you did not deem possible.

Although the worst for me would be the Joker. Why? Well, he will NOT make you feel as much pain as Doom or Darkseid would, but the FACT is seeing the Joker walking towards you with a knife, and you are tied up, means that you are indeed F@CKED UP!

The sight alone should make any sane person (who knows who the Joker is) simply ....well ....know they are f'd up.

Mr. Slippyfist
Hulk listens to reason. smile

Martian_mind
Um...how is playing chicken with Juggernaut that dangeroius?

just give up at the first step...

TricksterPriest
The only thing that would top the Joker IMO, is if DS actually used the ALE on you. As seen in Seven Soldiers, it's a nightmare.

psycho gundam
Originally posted by Inhuman
9. Tied up in the bottom(under toilet) of a portable potty. And The blob is approaching from an all you can eat buffet fest.

10. Caught by batman in his batcave by surprise wearing nothing but a small speedo. shifty

11. Caught by Thanos banging death in his bed.

12. Tied to a chair with a looped video playing of you pissing on the american flag wearing a hitler costume & decapitating bucky terroist style. With Captain America apraoching. lol 12 will get you the most savage beating of a lifetime. if you read those old cap comics, omg the shit he did to people who dared to wage war

Endless Mike
8, because it will be the quickest and least painful

Southern_Rebel
I'd take scenario 1, with the Joker.

Assuming that only my arms are tied behind the chair....I could kick the knife out of Joker's hand....kick him in the knee-cap...and as soon as he bends over in pain...I would wrap my legs around his neck..and break it. Then I'll have some time to get my arms loose...and leave the room.

Inhuman
Originally posted by Southern_Rebel
I'd take scenario 1, with the Joker.

Assuming that only my arms are tied behind the chair....I could kick the knife out of Joker's hand....kick him in the knee-cap...and as soon as he bends over in pain...I would wrap my legs around his neck..and break it. Then I'll have some time to get my arms loose...and leave the room.

qtired

Southern_Rebel
Originally posted by Inhuman
qtired


laughing


Well, the Joker is the only ass I could really whoop out of all these characters listed...assuming they were all real of course.

So, yeah..I'd pick the Joker scenario.

Mr. Slippyfist
Lulz.

Joker would rape your face, and your mother.

Southern_Rebel
Originally posted by Mr. Slippyfist
Lulz.

Joker would rape your face, and your mother.


laughing


Not in this life time, son

spetznaz
The Joker is at times depicted as being quite good at fighting.

Also, the Joker is said to be quite brilliant (ranging from exceptionally smart albeit in a malevolent manner, all the way to being Batman-lite). Thus, it is highly improbable that he would be taken by a simple kick to the knife/leg crank combo.

Southern_Rebel
Originally posted by spetznaz
The Joker is at times depicted as being quite good at fighting.

Also, the Joker is said to be quite brilliant (ranging from exceptionally smart albeit in a malevolent manner, all the way to being Batman-lite). Thus, it is highly improbable that he would be taken by a simple kick to the knife/leg crank combo.

Maybe so...but, he's not above getting an ass whooping. He is only human after all...not some uber being. My chances against him are much better than with any other being involved in this thread scenario.

Mr. Slippyfist
Punisher is only human as well... as is Batman, as is Karate Kid...

All of which would punch your jaw straight through your ass hole.

Southern_Rebel
Originally posted by Mr. Slippyfist
Punisher is only human as well... as is Batman, as is Karate Kid...

All of which would punch your jaw straight through your ass hole.


They are all more highly trained in the fighting arts..than Joker. Joker is just a street thug..with just street level fighting styles. Punisher, Batman, KK...are all trained to kill...even with just their bare hands....Joker isn't.

Martian_mind
Lulz.

Southern_Rebel
Alright...if any of you had the choice to go one on one with either Punisher or Joker...which one would it be?

If anyone says Joker..then that is bullshit.

Martian_mind
Originally posted by Southern_Rebel
Alright...if any of you had the choice to go one on one with either Punisher or Joker...which one would it be?

If anyone says Joker..then that is bullshit.

Punisher wouldn't kill me.

Or you know,rip out my tongue bare-handed and eat it,as he's done before.

Inhuman
Originally posted by Mr. Slippyfist
Punisher is only human as well... as is Batman, as is Karate Kid...
All of which would punch your jaw straight through your ass hole.

laughing out loud


Originally posted by Southern_Rebel
My chances against him are much better than with any other being involved in this thread scenario.

What are your feats? mmm

Southern_Rebel
Originally posted by Inhuman
laughing out loud




What are your feats? mmm

For one..I can take care of my own problems without hiring thugs to go around trying to beat up Batman for me.

I'm used to fighting, actually...from the military to head security at various bars and clubs. I'm not above getting my own ass whipped...cause it has happened, but I can dish it out too. I just don't see Joker doing it one on one. He's more formidable with his mad schemes...nerve gas, etc...not H2H...he's not known for that.

Inhuman
Originally posted by Southern_Rebel
For one..I can take care of my own problems without hiring thugs to go around trying to beat up Batman for me.

I'm used to fighting, actually...from the military to head security at various bars and clubs. I'm not above getting my own ass whipped...cause it has happened, but I can dish it out too. I just don't see Joker doing it one on one. He's more formidable with his mad schemes...nerve gas, etc...not H2H...he's not known for that.

Joker 10/10 ermmgay

Southern_Rebel
Originally posted by Inhuman
Joker 10/10 ermmgay


Not on his best day.

Anyway, this is stupid..since he's not real...and there's no way to prove it.

janus77
scenario 11 with Death ... could anyone come up with a more literal definition of "Deathbed"?


definitely would think the Joker situation is the worst.
Doom would at least listen to reason and perhaps be open to some sort of scheme or other. Ds would just look like a gorilla in spandex and that would lessen the blow of whatever punishment he inflicts. Punisher is probably sexually repressed, might get some kicks out of messing with his mind as he attempts to mangle me.

Hulk wouldn't even acknowledge me as a threat and so wouldn't waste the time of day on me, Juggernaut's too stupid I could easily turn him into my henchmen. Superboy... brutal and stupid, again one whose mind you can twist to your own advantage ...

Joker is lethal.

llagrok
If I'm lucky, Darkseid would just scan my mind and determine that I don't know anything. If not, then that's the scenario I would least want to experience.

Originally posted by Southern_Rebel
I'd take scenario 1, with the Joker.

Assuming that only my arms are tied behind the chair....I could kick the knife out of Joker's hand....kick him in the knee-cap...and as soon as he bends over in pain...I would wrap my legs around his neck..and break it. Then I'll have some time to get my arms loose...and leave the room.

You'll take scenario 1?

"What scenario would you want to be in the least"

Southern_Rebel
Originally posted by llagrok
If I'm lucky, Darkseid would just scan my mind and determine that I don't know anything. If not, then that's the scenario I would least want to experience.



You'll take scenario 1?

"What scenario would you want to be in the least"


Well, Darkseid would just end up sending me to Desaad...who would conduct cruel experiments on me..more than likely....so, that would be the last scenario that I choose to experience.

llagrok
Originally posted by Southern_Rebel
Well, Darkseid would just end up sending me to Desaad...who would conduct cruel experiments on me..more than likely....so, that would be the last scenario that I choose to experience.

Darkseid would butt**** you for days mad

Southern_Rebel
Originally posted by llagrok
Darkseid would butt**** you for days mad


laughing



Damn, If I was Nvr...I might just get excited thinkin' about that scenario.

llagrok
Originally posted by Southern_Rebel
laughing



Damn, If I was Nvr...I might just get excited thinkin' about that scenario.

Yeah.....if....

shifty

Tron
Originally posted by Southern_Rebel
I'd take scenario 1, with the Joker.

Assuming that only my arms are tied behind the chair....I could kick the knife out of Joker's hand....kick him in the knee-cap...and as soon as he bends over in pain...I would wrap my legs around his neck..and break it. Then I'll have some time to get my arms loose...and leave the room.

I hope you understand that the chances of that happening are very slim, right? You're first mistake, and you're dealing with a very pissed off homicidal maniac, who may now have a fate worse than what he originally had planned for you.

Now, since we know the Joker is NOT an idiot, we'll assume that it isn't just your arms tied behind the chair, cause that would make the most sense.

Inhuman
Originally posted by Southern_Rebel
Damn, If I was Nvr...I might just get excited thinkin' about that scenario.

So he would chose scenario 10 - I suppose. jr_hmm01

Southern_Rebel
Originally posted by Tron
I hope you understand that the chances of that happening are very slim, right? You're first mistake, and you're dealing with a very pissed off homicidal maniac, who may now have a fate worse than what he originally had planned for you.

Now, since we know the Joker is NOT an idiot, we'll assume that it isn't just your arms tied behind the chair, cause that would make the most sense.


laughing


Well, I would've already cut the ropes from my hands before Joker entered the room. I would pretend like my hands were still tied as he approached me, then when he got close..and when he least expected it(you know...as he goes off on some wild tangent, telling me what kind of crazy plan he has in store for me) I would gut him with the blade I used to free myself.

I have to survive, somehow.... evil face

Southern_Rebel
Originally posted by Inhuman
So he would chose scenario 10 - I suppose. jr_hmm01



Yeah....Nvr would...or that other freak...spear of destiny...or whatever the hell his name is...they both roll like that.

Mr. Slippyfist
When exactly did you turn into James Bond?

bobbi
I'd say Joker is the worst. Doom and Darkseid would figure out pretty quickly that I didn't know what they wanted. You can't reason with the Joker.

Mindset
Doom and Darkseid wouldn't care if you knew anything or not though.

Thorion
Definitely 1. Hulk, SMP, Nova etc. would all be over quickly. Joker, however....

psycho gundam
Originally posted by Southern_Rebel
Yeah....Nvr would...or that other freak...spear of destiny...or whatever the hell his name is...they both roll like that. this should be in the ownage thread

Acrosurge
IMO, Darkseid is the worst case scenario here. He can cause the most physical, mental, emotional, and downright cosmic anguish. He can heal you then do it all over again. That's what he has over the Joker, who would be a close second, but cannot do what Darkseid does.

TricksterPriest
Originally posted by Acrosurge
IMO, Darkseid is the worst case scenario here. He can cause the most physical, mental, emotional, and downright cosmic anguish. He can heal you then do it all over again. That's what he has over the Joker, who would be a close second, but cannot do what Darkseid does.

Agreed. DS has the ability to rez, something none of the others (maybe Doom if he had shitload of preptime, but I think that's beyond even his magic) have.

Thing is, DS is a pragmatist. If you really don't have what he wants, he'll just banish you. Or if he's annoyed, you get to be Desaad's new toy. evil face

Personally, the Joker scares me more than DS. Unless he's got the ALE.

Symmetric Chaos
Originally posted by Bouboumaster
Where would you want to be the least?

1- Tied on a chair, with the Jocker approching, with a knife, smiling?

2- Tied on a chair, with the Punisher approching, with a knife, accusing you to be a pedophilia?

3- In front of Hulk in his "World War Mode"

4- In a game of chicken with Juggernaut

5- In a torture chamber of Doom, who think that you know the secret to bring down Richards

6- In front of Darkseid, who think that you are the key for the ALE

7- In you living room, with Superman prime paying you a visit

8- In a middle of a hug between Human Torch and Nova, herald of Galactus, newly resurrected

1 or 5

I doubt the others would prolong the suffering so much or so horribly. Frank would try, I'm sure, but I don't think he could match up to what Joker or Doom might do.

Mindset
Originally posted by Symmetric Chaos
1 or 5

I doubt the others would prolong the suffering so much or so horribly. Frank would try, I'm sure, but I don't think he could match up to what Joker or Doom might do.

Have you read MAX Punisher?

Val
Originally posted by Thorion
Definitely 1. Hulk, SMP, Nova etc. would all be over quickly. Joker, however....
Ditto.

Val
Originally posted by Southern_Rebel
I'd take scenario 1, with the Joker.

Assuming that only my arms are tied behind the chair....I could kick the knife out of Joker's hand....kick him in the knee-cap...and as soon as he bends over in pain...I would wrap my legs around his neck..and break it. Then I'll have some time to get my arms loose...and leave the room.
Are you familiar with masterbruce?

MightyEInherjar
With Joker, you have to die thinking about what he's going to do to your family, your friends, etc when you're gone.

Bouboumaster
Originally posted by Symmetric Chaos
1 or 5

I doubt the others would prolong the suffering so much or so horribly. Frank would try, I'm sure, but I don't think he could match up to what Joker or Doom might do.

Do you know Jigsaw?

Symmetric Chaos
Originally posted by Bouboumaster
Do you know Jigsaw?

No. Why?

Mindset
jigsaw is from the Saw movies

hugekent
They all seem really bad except for the Hulk one. What is chicken btw?

Bouboumaster
Originally posted by Symmetric Chaos
No. Why?

Because of this:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jigsaw_(Marvel_Comics)

Mindset
Originally posted by Bouboumaster
Because of this:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jigsaw_(Marvel_Comics)
OOOOOOOOOOOOO that jigsaw

Becci
Originally posted by Bouboumaster
Where would you want to be the least?

1- Tied on a chair, with the Jocker approching, with a knife, smiling?

2- Tied on a chair, with the Punisher approching, with a knife, accusing you to be a pedophilia?

3- In front of Hulk in his "World War Mode"

4- In a game of chicken with Juggernaut

5- In a torture chamber of Doom, who think that you know the secret to bring down Richards

6- In front of Darkseid, who think that you are the key for the ALE

7- In you living room, with Superman prime paying you a visit

8- In a middle of a hug between Human Torch and Nova, herald of Galactus, newly resurrected

4.... with me being the chicken.

Inhuman
Nobody likes 9-12 ? ermmfrown

Priest
Originally posted by Inhuman
Nobody likes 9-12 ? ermmfrown
You would welcome number tenpeaches

Inhuman
Originally posted by Priest
You would welcome number tenpeaches

Perhaps... shifty


Bruce would just give lend me some of his clothes and send me on my way right ? whistle

Blair Wind
Apparently Hulk has never killed an innocent person

King Kandy
Originally posted by Blair Wind
Apparently Hulk has never killed an innocent person
Yeah right. That's bullshit.

Mr. Slippyfist
Who did he kill?

Mindset
My papa sad

Priest
Originally posted by King Kandy
Yeah right. That's bullshit.
its true..

psycho gundam
thunderclaps flatten whole buildings. i dont care what time of day it is, someone is in said building(janitor etc)

Blair Wind
Originally posted by King Kandy
Yeah right. That's bullshit.

Have you read what Amadeus Cho said? What the Hulk did after that? ermm

TricksterPriest
I still call it BS. I'm damn sure that destruction of powerlines, roads, etc, caused at least one death. Fires, hospitals being out of power, emergencies, destruction of property, etc.

What Cho said is such a leap of logic and believability, that even for a comic book, you can't expect us to take that seriously. erm

llagrok
Indirectly, Hulk caused the death of many people.

What do you think massive environmental destruction does? It completely ruins people's economy, house and life savings all gone.

Priest
Originally posted by llagrok
Indirectly, Hulk caused the death of many people.

What do you think massive environmental destruction does? It completely ruins people's economy, house and life savings all gone. Im sure the 6th smartest man in the world took that into account stoned

Deathstroke
Originally posted by Blair Wind
Have you read what Amadeus Cho said? What the Hulk did after that? ermm
What'd he say?

llagrok
Originally posted by Priest
Im sure the 6th smartest man in the world took that into account stoned

Who? Ares?

Priest
Originally posted by llagrok
Who? Ares?
Cho confused

King Kandy
I don't care what Amadeus Cho said, that's obviously not true.

Kutulu
Originally posted by Inhuman
qtired

g_grin

bobbi
I'm not sure if Cho reviewed every fight the hulk has been in but to say hulks actions never led to a death is extreme. He demolishes cities. Unless every city he's been in had janitors, taxi drivers, laundromat owners that earned millions of dollars and could afford the loss of a job and a house, he's probably caused a few deaths and at least huge suffering. and as was said not every building he smashes is always completely empty. That would be almost impossible.

The only thing that makes sense is Hulk tries his best not to kill anyone. Like superman or batman or something. Collateral damage will always happen when your punches can demolish buildings.

Utrigita
Option One, if I can choose one more then it stands between four and five

Symmetric Chaos
Originally posted by Deathstroke
What'd he say?

He said Hulk has never killed an innocent person because Banner psyche holds him back and subtly directs his actions. For example Hulk would crush a tank but not hurt anyone inside. Hulk cited examples of people he's killed which Cho said were time he had no choice but to kill.

Pak effectively retconned the deaths that were assumed have occurred directly from Hulk's fights.

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