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Clyde Vs Jack Bauer
Started by: Sadako of Girth

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Sadako of Girth
Extreme Mode

Gender: Male
Location: McClane's Right one

Clyde Vs Jack Bauer

Whilst Jack Bauer visits Philo Beddoe on car business, Clyde takes the day off of caddy scrapping duties at Philo's repair and scrap yard and goes on a hunt for Oreos.

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He smells them in Bauer's grocery bag that sits in the car Philo is repairing for him and wants them, but as he goes towards them, closing range, Jack sees him and engages Clyde in unarmed combat.

They fight to the death.

Who wins...?


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"Van Zan is the Pinocchio of feces." - Lestov16

Last edited by Sadako of Girth on Feb 5th, 2013 at 10:53 PM

Old Post Feb 5th, 2013 10:44 PM
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Lestov16
CTU Field Agent

Gender: Male
Location: 4th Street Underpass, Manhattan

Haven't seen the film, but enraged orangutans are pretty scary. Even if Jack managed to break it's neck, his face would definitely be mauled. Then again, haven't seen the film. Can someone get some youtube clips of Clyde's fight scenes?

Just based off the facts: enraged orangutan vs human in unarmed combat, I'd say orangutan 6.5 out of 10 (won't say 7 because Jack is a pretty good neck snapper)


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"Tell him that you've got credible intelligence about a threat to his life"-
Jack Bauer

Old Post Feb 5th, 2013 10:51 PM
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Sadako of Girth
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"Van Zan is the Pinocchio of feces." - Lestov16

Old Post Feb 5th, 2013 10:56 PM
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Lestov16
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Blatant spite thread


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"Tell him that you've got credible intelligence about a threat to his life"-
Jack Bauer

Old Post Feb 5th, 2013 11:00 PM
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Sadako of Girth
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Nope. You yourself rate Bauer as able to snap Clyde's neck, Mr.spitey butthurt.


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"Van Zan is the Pinocchio of feces." - Lestov16

Old Post Feb 5th, 2013 11:05 PM
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Lestov16
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Nope. You yourself rate Bauer as able to snap Clyde's neck, Mr.spitey butthurt.


I blatantly said I hadn't seen the film. Bauer clearly dies here. Anyone short of Marv dies here. Lol at your thinly-veiled spite thread.


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"Tell him that you've got credible intelligence about a threat to his life"-
Jack Bauer

Old Post Feb 5th, 2013 11:15 PM
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Sadako of Girth
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Well he clearly dies in all those McBauer threads before too, so whats changed?

quote: (post)
Originally posted by Lestov16

Just based off the facts: enraged orangutan vs human in unarmed combat, I'd say orangutan 6.5 out of 10 (won't say 7 because Jack is a pretty good neck snapper)



Dude you Eli'd up a genuinely attempted spite thread cause McClane beat the possession box, after making your McClane vs Bauer thread after McClane Vs Bauer thread out of your feelings of rectal violation, when Tony's biatch kept losing again and again.

You shall not speaketh of spite threads to me.
smokin'


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"Van Zan is the Pinocchio of feces." - Lestov16

Old Post Feb 5th, 2013 11:19 PM
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Lestov16
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Well he clearly dies in all those McBauer threads before too, so whats changed?




Dude you Eli'd up a genuinely attempted spite thread cause McClane beat the possession box, after making your McClane vs Bauer thread after McClane Vs Bauer thread out of your feelings of rectal violation, when Tony's biatch kept losing again and again.

You shall not speaketh of spite threads to me.
smokin'


laughing McClane hasn't won any of the threads you listed. GTFO with your obvious McBullshit.

This is a blatant spite thread. I have never once said that Jack has the strength to rip apart cars with is bare hands. Again, LOL at your failed spite thread, bucko laughing


__________________


"Tell him that you've got credible intelligence about a threat to his life"-
Jack Bauer

Old Post Feb 5th, 2013 11:27 PM
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Sadako of Girth
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Except he won them all and very conclusively.

If it is, (and it isnt) your numerous spite threads all pre-dated it.

Its not a failed spite thread. Thats in your mind. Its a successful non spite thread. Big difference.


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"Van Zan is the Pinocchio of feces." - Lestov16

Old Post Feb 5th, 2013 11:41 PM
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Lestov16
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None of the threads on this board count because Bauer's feats lie in his television appearances (although his feats in his TV movie themself rival anything McClane's done in terms of CQB). You putridly trolled the board AVF and provoked me into a rage which got the thread closed, tactics which you accused RJ of doing several times. Matter of fact, you are acting exactly like RJ when he's on his trolling rants.....

laughing You are RJ at his worst. You claimed McClane can pwn supernatural entities, RJ claimed that Blade could beat Hit Girl. You guys are two sides of the same trolling fanboy coin. :lol;

Enjoy your failed spite thread, kiddo. Get back to me (and the rest of reality) when you're done polishing McClane's other bald head


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"Tell him that you've got credible intelligence about a threat to his life"-
Jack Bauer

Old Post Feb 5th, 2013 11:58 PM
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Robtard
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"Provoked me into a rage" LoL


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Old Post Feb 6th, 2013 01:03 AM
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Lestov16
CTU Field Agent

Gender: Male
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by Robtard
"Provoked me into a rage" LoL



Yeah. You should be familiar with it, since you accused RJ of doing it in the Bobby Lee Swagger vs Agent 47 thread. GTFO with your hypocrisy, trollboy


__________________


"Tell him that you've got credible intelligence about a threat to his life"-
Jack Bauer

Old Post Feb 6th, 2013 01:32 AM
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BruceSkywalker
The BatLord of the Jedi

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dare i say.. clyde ftw,,,lol


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THE TRIAL NEVER ENDS...thanks steve

Old Post Feb 6th, 2013 05:59 AM
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Sadako of Girth
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Wow.
If you were provoked into rage over a fictitious character thread disagreement, then it may be time to chill out and do other things.
Kinda sad how you're still in the 'childishly blames everyone else (even grown ups) for his own shortcomings' phase, though.

Wow x2..Someone really likes their RJ, doesn't they...? Is this the source of your butthurt? He pulling your anal strings?
RJ means nothing to me, so if you're thinking that evoking his name is gonna affect/provoke me somehow, th..... oh....! look! A squirrel....!!!!!
smile
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"Van Zan is the Pinocchio of feces." - Lestov16

Old Post Feb 6th, 2013 09:26 AM
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Sadako of Girth
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quote: (post)
Originally posted by BruceSkywalker
dare i say.. clyde ftw,,,lol


Spoken like an unbiased, unbutthurt bastion of truth.






See, Lesty....? THATS how its done.


__________________



"Van Zan is the Pinocchio of feces." - Lestov16

Old Post Feb 6th, 2013 09:29 AM
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Lestov16
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Gender: Male
Location: 4th Street Underpass, Manhattan

quote: (post)
Originally posted by Lestov16


Enjoy your failed spite thread, kiddo. Get back to me (and the rest of reality) when you're done polishing McClane's other bald head


__________________


"Tell him that you've got credible intelligence about a threat to his life"-
Jack Bauer

Old Post Feb 6th, 2013 11:31 AM
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Sadako of Girth
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Location: McClane's Right one

Well, Rageboy... firstly, I've had hangovers older than you, so the calling me 'kiddo' is yet more projection by you. Get back me after your illogical and ferverant nomming off of Bauer in lala land.

Secondly, you lose and cry lots: Fact. Its okay though. Everyone needs a skill and yours is in being excellently wrong all the time, and your wildly inaccurate suppositions leave more correctness for the ones who make the smart choice.


__________________



"Van Zan is the Pinocchio of feces." - Lestov16

Last edited by Sadako of Girth on Feb 6th, 2013 at 11:58 AM

Old Post Feb 6th, 2013 11:53 AM
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Lestov16
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Location: 4th Street Underpass, Manhattan

How do I lose an obvious spite thread? laughing More delusions from a retarded biased fanboy


__________________


"Tell him that you've got credible intelligence about a threat to his life"-
Jack Bauer

Old Post Feb 6th, 2013 01:12 PM
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Sadako of Girth
Extreme Mode

Gender: Male
Location: McClane's Right one

Well you create them over and over and again (like the tonnes of illegal ones you man in MVF as Bauer had zero jurisdiction there) and fail to win them over and over again. (Like you did in said MVF AND the AVF attempt you made) Its really not rocket science, BWOBH...


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"Van Zan is the Pinocchio of feces." - Lestov16

Last edited by Sadako of Girth on Feb 6th, 2013 at 01:28 PM

Old Post Feb 6th, 2013 01:26 PM
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Lestov16
CTU Field Agent

Gender: Male
Location: 4th Street Underpass, Manhattan

quote: (post)
Originally posted by Sadako of Girth
Well, Rageboy... firstly, I've had hangovers older than you, so the calling me 'kiddo' is yet more projection by you. Get back me after your illogical and ferverant nomming off of Bauer in lala land.
.


laughing See I'm getting in your head there, sport. Go drink your sippy cup.


__________________


"Tell him that you've got credible intelligence about a threat to his life"-
Jack Bauer

Old Post Feb 6th, 2013 01:29 PM
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