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Funniest Joke In A Film
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Aku
Drunk

Gender: Male
Location: Drunk

Tongue Funniest Joke In A Film

Quoted from road trip........

Girl: You mean never? not even once.

Kyle: O yeah i have had sex before, just never with another person.

Please post the funniest quote from a film, it can be from good films (road trip, airheads) crap films (van helsing, american pie) or from non comedies (matrix, x-men).

You decide.......Please add a humping banana at the end of each reply like so......... Happy Dance


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Old Post May 17th, 2004 07:49 PM
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Myth
Give me your babies!!!

Gender: Male
Location: Oregon

The Funny Mans joke from Boondock Saints. "I'll have a coke then."


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Old Post May 17th, 2004 11:16 PM
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amity75
Senior Member

Gender: Male
Location: Scotland nil.

Not really a joke but it made me hoot - "I think I just shot Marvin in the face" Vincent Vega - Pulp Fiction.


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Old Post May 17th, 2004 11:31 PM
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Myth
Give me your babies!!!

Gender: Male
Location: Oregon

Thats a funny quote, but not a 'joke'.


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Old Post May 17th, 2004 11:53 PM
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roundisfunny
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Gender: Unspecified
Location: United States

In "Ransom", the kind-hearted kidnapper asks the kid "Why can't you starve in the desert? Because of all the sand-wiches!"

The victim at the beginning of "Jerry and Tom" tells a few groaners:

A grasshopper walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Hey, we have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper says, "You have a drink named Kevin?"

Also: a guy walks into a doctor's office with a duck on his head. The doctor says "Can I help you?" and the duck says "Yeah...can you get this guy off my ass?"

He started another joke which he didn't get to finish, but I suspect it was the one that ends "And at these prices, you won't get many more!"

Speaking of unfinished jokes, I've wondered for 20 years what the punchline could be to the one Judd Nelson was telling to himself while crawling through the rafters in "The Breakfast Club". I guess it'll have to be one of life's little mysteries.

That joke from "Boondock Saints" was also told by Harry Belafonte in Robert Altman's "Kansas City", but the punchline is "I'll have a martini."

Also, Myth, I'm surprised you didn't mention Mia Wallace's Fox Force Five joke from PF.


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Last edited by roundisfunny on May 18th, 2004 at 12:38 AM

Old Post May 18th, 2004 12:35 AM
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Myth
Give me your babies!!!

Gender: Male
Location: Oregon

Thats because its not as funny. Sure I like that little tid-bit, but not as much. Also, the Desperado joke where the guy pisses all over.


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Old Post May 18th, 2004 02:13 AM
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forumcrew
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Location: United States

the movie super troopers... enough said


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Old Post May 18th, 2004 02:42 AM
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Myth
Give me your babies!!!

Gender: Male
Location: Oregon

I don't think that is enough said. What is the joke? This isn't funniest movie, its funniest 'joke.'


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Old Post May 18th, 2004 07:20 AM
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trv16
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me tristan who are you guys


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TRIGUN

Old Post May 18th, 2004 07:25 AM
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trv16
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and gals


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TRIGUN

Old Post May 18th, 2004 07:26 AM
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Aku
Drunk

Gender: Male
Location: Drunk

Funniest quote, joke, film if ya like. And it doesnt have to be from comedies it can be from cheesy films (mummy, van helsing).

Heres one for ya from the good old english classic 'lock stock and two smoking barrels'.

Ed):- We hit them as soon as they come back. We'll be prepared waiting.....and er.........they're armed.

Soap):- What was that? Armed? what do you mean armed? armed with what?

Ed):- Er Colourfull language, bad breath, feather duster, what do you think there gonna be armed with? guns you t*t!!!

Soap):- You never said anything about guns. A minute ago, this was the safest job in the world, now its turning into a bad day in bosnia.

Happy Dance


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Old Post May 18th, 2004 09:05 AM
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botankus
Bass-ackwards

Gender: Male
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quote:
Originally posted by Myth
I don't think that is enough said. What is the joke? This isn't funniest movie, its funniest 'joke.'


Maybe the movie is the joke. Although I would never say that about any movie whatsoever abbreviated as S. Troopers.


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Old Post May 18th, 2004 03:21 PM
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Aku
Drunk

Gender: Male
Location: Drunk

Starship troopers although i absolutley love it to death is a joke.


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Old Post May 18th, 2004 03:50 PM
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Discos
The Discmeister

Gender: Male
Location: Scotland

in Sgt. Bilko

Soldier: Permission to speal freely sargent
Bilko: What are we in Russia? yeah go ahead


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Old Post May 18th, 2004 04:44 PM
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Curl_Up&Dye
Pretty in Pink

Gender: Female
Location: Massachusetts, USA

dumb and dumber


also the insults from Full Metal Jacket made me crack up


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Old Post May 18th, 2004 05:43 PM
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botankus
Bass-ackwards

Gender: Male
Location: Eastern NC

quote:
Originally posted by Discos
in Sgt. Bilko

Soldier: Permission to speal freely sargent
Bilko: What are we in Russia? yeah go ahead


Also from Sgt. Bilko:

(During bogus room check)

Major (pulling out bra from closet): Is this yours?
Private: It is my understanding that you can no longer ask me these questions.

ALSO

Major: Who are these people?
Private: They're from my favorite television show, The African-American hour. It's funny, but it makes you think.


Funny scene, would have to have seen the movie to laugh.


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Old Post May 18th, 2004 06:32 PM
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Aku
Drunk

Gender: Male
Location: Drunk

Again from Lock Stock....

Bacon:- And you keep all the money.

Soap:- I'd rather put my money on a 3-Legged rockin' horse. The odds are 100 to 1 for a good reason bacon. IT WONT WIN.

Or Another--------------------------------------------------

Tom:- That is 900 nicker (pounds/ $1440) in any shop your lucky to find one in, and your arguing over £200? What kind of finance did you study? Its a deal, its a steal, sale of the F**king century. In fact....f**k it nick i think ill keep it.

Nick:- Alright, alright keep your allans on.

*Nick pulls out a huge amount of money out of his pockets*

Nick:- Here £100

Tom+Ed:- JESUS CHRIST

Ed:- You could choke a dozen donkies on that. What are you doing when ya not buying stereos nick? finance revolutions?

Nick:- £100 is still £100.

Tom:- Not when the price is £200 and certainly not when youve got Liberias deposite in ya wallet.

Bit long but hey.............

Happy Dance Happy Dance


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Old Post May 19th, 2004 12:14 PM
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botankus
Bass-ackwards

Gender: Male
Location: Eastern NC

I don't know why but every time I watch Office Space I always laugh out loud at this part:

"...turn off your answering machine, and you should be home free."
"That's a really good idea."
"F***in A, man." (said real nonchalantly, that's the best part of it)


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Old Post May 19th, 2004 01:32 PM
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roundisfunny
Senior Member

Gender: Unspecified
Location: United States

Nick had Liberia's deficit in his skyrocket (pocket), part of that rhyming Cockney slang, remember?

The DVD features a glossary full of such terms, some of which weren't even used in the movie.


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Old Post May 19th, 2004 11:49 PM
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Aku
Drunk

Gender: Male
Location: Drunk

Jokes can even be from computer games like GTA3 from chatterbox.

Laslow: Well im not a mastercating cow so i really dont enjoy chewing damp hay, prancing around in leggings, shouting HAI YA.

Reed: Ok this is your final warning laslow dont make me go into my dragon stance.

Laslow: ok caller on line one your on the air.

Caller: .................But then i grew weak and started knocking things down with the broom, what do i do reed?

Reed: Don't worry my child we are all weak..

Laslow: you certainly are....

Reed: SHUT UP YOU CARNIVORE WHY DONT YOU GO AND KNAW ON A BONE LIKE A GORILLA LASLOW, I dont like chicken wings, people of old lived and consisted of a diet of nuts berrys and fruity vegetables.

Laslow: Yes and they started throwing stones at their shadow and died of old age and fear at 24.


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Old Post May 21st, 2004 03:46 PM
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