Alright folks I throw in the towel but just let me say this to you girls. If you have sex too young you WILL regret it when you are 25. You will feel cheap or like a s l u t. 99% of teen guys do not care about you the way you'd like. They only seek to get some and will tell you anything to get you in bed. If you do only want sex from them then I feel very sorry for you and like I said you WILL regreat it when you are in your 20s.
You are all seeming to be under the delusion thatyou can fix or prevents STDs. You are wrong
You seem to think the morning after pill is a solution is being promiscous well try it and let me know how that make you feel inside.
"You are ready when you are mature enough"? "Well I am 12 so I and I think I am mature enough" or "oh I am a 16 year old girl and he is 20. SCORE!" Are you kidding me??? You think that as a teen you are mature enough? Just by you saying that is proof immaturity. Any older person will tell you that they all thought they were mature enough (most fell to peer pressure) only to realise later that they were not. If you are in your 20s and are think that junk of having sex as a teen then shame on you.
I know it sounds like I am giving you heck but MAN if only you could see in the future you'd never do it until later.
Don't bother replying to me becasue I wont read this thread again. Just makes me too sad
I agree with him 100%..........and I'm happy to tell you I get laid on a regular basis, in many varying positions.
His postion is quite simple. Everybody thinks they are mature enough at the time.......whether they be 8, 11 or 16. Hell, anybody who does anything believes they are mature enough at the time. Not one person on this earth logically states, "I'm not mature enough to make this decision......but I will do so anyway". It's sad but most people are not mature enough to be having sex the first time they do so......I was 16 and I still wasn't mature enough. If I had gotten a girl pregnant or contracted an incurable STD.......I would have been S.O.L.
By the way you say it though, you didn't get the girl pregnant or got an STD, so what's so bad about it? The two bad things that could have happened to you didn't. You were mature enough to be intelligent about it and nothing happened. That's what is meant by 'mature enough'. When you're mature enough not to be stupid and go at it without a condom, or making sure the girl is on birth control, etc. That's the best time to do it.
I lost it at 15 and don't regret it at all. I didn't get the girl pregnant and I didn't get an STD. It was great. I dont regret it and won't be regretting it in the future. I'll regret it when something bad happens, but Im smart enough to take the right precautions.
I disagree. Mature enough means you are reasonably responsible enough to handle the responsibility of the result......which in either case I wouldn't have been. True, all went well for me.......that's not due to maturity, that's just dumb luck. Bad things don't always happen to other people.............that's why we've got hundreds of thousands of teenage parents dropping out of high school, never getting an education and raising families in poverty every year.
That's a reasonable definition of 'mature enough', but I just don't agree. I agree that you should be responsible enough to be able to handle an unwanted result, but also be responsible enough to do what you can to prevent that same unwanted result while enjoying yourself in the process.
Even disregarding what I've learned through my mother's 20-odd years working for the Department of Health, I saw the level of immiturity that I am talking about just through working in public health at a hospital. Being intelligent enough to take preventative measures will greatly reduce the number of teenage parents that you mentioned, and it also applies to adults. Teenagers aren't the only ones who have unwanted pregancies or contract STDs.
true. But the older the person is, the more likely they are to have a career and a means of income to support their unwanted child or have good medical coverage to seek medical care at first sign of an incurable disease or have it revealed in a regular check up. They are fincancially responsible enough to deal with the situation if nothing else........which puts them many rungs up the ladder from a 15 year old kid.
to me, mature enough means to not be blinded into a false sense of security and love due to sex with an older guy/gal whose trying to take advantage of you and being strong enough to HANDLE the physical and mental challenges and impacts{specially since people in soceity these days have been programmed from birth to detest the sexual organs etc and the transition from it being a sin to it actually being ok has many serious affects}and lastly to have sex out of your own choice and not peer pressure etc. 16 is an almost ideal age cause if you DONT by then than its actually bad for ur health and can **** up your mentality very easily.
Then we're just talking about two different kinds of maturity. I'm arguing that they have to at least mentally mature, and you're saying they have to be physically and financially mature (lets face it, money comes with age. I don't know of too many 15 year olds making 30-40 grand a year)
where do you get your information? I know many people who did not have sex until they were 18, 20 and some even until they were married. All seem to be happy, well-adjusted people to me.....living the good ol' family life.
For one, someone who is 12 would not be ready nor mature enough, they would only THINK they are. There's a difference between THINKING you are ready and mature enough and KNOWING when you are ready and mature enough. Someone who is 16, yeah, they might actually be really ready and mature enough. At that age, they are in the stages of life where sex becomes an issue. They start teaching sex ed when you are in grade 6, which would be when you are 12 (or at least they did back when I was in school) so you get an idea of what sex is and what diseases can come along with it if you are irresponsible.
ANYONE who believes in peer pressure is a loser. Harsh? Yeah, but that is my opinion. No one has the right to make you do anything and if you are stupid enough not to say no, you deserve to get what is coming to you. saying "I was pressured into it" is just an excuse. EVERYONE has the power to say NO. No one has to do anything they don't want to.
I think it is shallow for people to say that if you are in your mid to late teens and you have sex, it's wrong or you will regret it. That is not true at all. I've seen some teens that are a hell of a lot more mature than older people. Like I said, the maturity level all depends on the person. I am 22 and I am way more mature than a ton of people. It's pretty sad really when people who should be setting an example for the younger ones are actually the ones looking like jerks. I was 20 when I lost my virginity to the person I am still with. Do you think I wasn't asked or bothered to do someone in school? Hell yes. But I am smarter than that and I said no because I didn't want to do something stupid. I think before I act and I use my own judgment. If people are too irresponsible to do that, they deserve to live with whatever happens. BE SMART. That's what people need to do.
you do readily admit, I would imagine, that there is a huge difference in your life between the ages of 14 and 20.....maturity, intellectually and financially?
but you posted earlier.....
which by all means a 14 year old girl could say. She may be wrong.....but "knowing" can only be attained after the fact and by then it's too late. As I stated earlier, nobody conciously thinks to themself, "I am not mature enough to make this decision but I'm going to anyway"........... the difference between thinking and knowing is that between forsight and hindsight.
A person knows personally when they are ready. They know they can take on the responsibility. By the age of 16, you've had enough sex ed that you know a thing or two about sex. If you are curious about sex at 14, go outside and play with your friends. 14 and 16 may not seem like far apart but you are much smarter at 16 than 14. At 16 (where I live) you can drive. That takes responsibility. At 16 you are able to get a job. Again, that takes responsibility. You start to learn what responsibilty feels like. It's different for someone who knows nothing about being responsible. Being responsible shows you are growing up. 16 is a coming of age where you are closer to being an adult. You start living like an adult with a car and a job while going to school.
If a person is smart, they will sit back and think of what could happen if things don't go as planned. As a 16 year old, MOST know that they don't want to have a kid. They are young, they want to hang out and have fun, not take care of a kid. At 20, you've been through school and already had years of responsibilty, probably have a full time job and probably don't live at home. You can sit back and say "well, if something does happen, I can handle it". That doesn't go for every 20 year old, but I hope you get my drift.
My main point is, if a person can think before taking action, that shows maturity and readiness. If a young girl is about to have sex and stops to think "wait, I don't want to do it, what if I get pregnant?" and decides against it, it's a responsible decision. If a young girl is about to have sex and makes sure he uses protection and has birth control, I see no reason why they can't so it. They are ready enough that they know what procedures to do before taking action. Both scenerios show the person is ready or not ready. The problem is, people fail to take the time to think.
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Apr 23rd, 2006 07:01 AM
