Mike: In 1994 while on weekend manoeuvres in France, I commandeered a Chieftain tank without the permission of my immediate superiors. I then attempted to invade Paris. However, en route I stopped off at Disneyland, or Eurodisney as it was then called, and was subsequently apprehended on Space Mountain.
TA Officer: Do you have any explanation as to why you might have done this?
Mike: Well sir, at the time, I was suffering from serious emotional problems that had clearly affected my judgement. I had immersed myself in a fantasy world of my own creation and as a result I became very insular and uncommunicative.
TA Officer: Why do you think that was?
Mike: [Shrugs] I dunno.
Bilbo Bagshot: I was like you once. Blonde hair. Scraggly little beard. Childlike ears. Full of beans, and spunk. I let my principles get in the way of things. I once punched a bloke out once for saying Hawk the Slayer was rubbish.
Tim: Good for you.
Bilbo Bagshot: Yeah, thanks. But that's not the point, Tim. The point is I was defending the fantasy genre with terminal intensity, when what I should have said was "Dad, you're right - but let's give Krull a try, and we'll discuss it later."
Mike: [To Colin the dog, while polishing his glasses] Better sit back, relax and get comfy, because you, my friend, are going nowhere. [Looks down to see that Colin is gone.] Oh, bollocks!
Duane Benzie: I haven't seen you since...
Tim: Yeah, well. No hard feelings, eh?
Duane Benzie: You shot me in the bollocks, Tim.
Tim: Yeah, well, like I say. No hard feelings.
KMC Community Forums
Oct 16th, 2008 05:31 PM
