quote: (post)

Originally posted by Moosey
Funny - but I don't see GERMAN-LAND on this list. Bastard.

http://www.presscave.com/top-best-c...e-in-the-world/


Nor do I see it on this MAP.

http://www.mapsofworld.com/world-to...f-life-map.html

Nor on any of the other lists - except one. And that was a 1939 Nazi index.

I do see a lot of CANADA on there.

Yay.

quote: (post)

Originally posted by Bardock42
Well, actually, Austria, the Netherlands and Denmark are all German so we are actually on the list three times...

quote:

The results may surprise you: we’re wealthier than the Americans, we live longer than the Swedes, we’re more industrious than the Germans, we have more lovers than the Italians, we eat better than the French and we have more TVs than the Japanese.

• If you’re not Canadian, you might know a Canadian or someone you highly suspect of being Canadian. Here are fifteen signs to know if you’re talking to one
  
  1. We Are Completely Comfortable With The Term “Homo Milk”.
  
  In Canada, this is an acceptable type of milk. I remember when someone asked my mom what type of milk she gave me as a child. I braced myself for a devastating mental image.
  
  He loves homo.
  
  Thanks, mom.
  
  Because that’s not confusing.
  
  homo-milk
  
  2. We Correct You When You Say “Soda”.
  
  We’ll say, “you mean pop?”. And then creepily stare at you until you call it ‘pop’.
  
  3. We Are Offended When You Ask Us If We Know A Friend Of Yours Who, Coincidentally, Also Lives In Canada.
  
  You’re from Canada? Do you know my friend Tom? He lives in Canada too.
  
  Ever since Canada was invented, we’ve been asked this question. The American soldiers did this during the War of 1812.
  
  Good war, dude. Good war. I think my buddy Jacques lives up in Canada. Vancouver or some shit. Tall guy, eyepiece? You probably know him.
  
  4. We Don’t Think “Legalizing Marijuana” Is A Debate.
  
  I’ve never met a Canadian with another view on it.
  
  Or I might have, but I was watching Garfield 2 while eating cookie dough.
  
  Odie’s a bad ass.
  
  5. We’ve All Rolled Up The Rim To Win.
  
  Ask any Canadian you know if they’ve ‘rolled up the rim’.
  
  They’ll say yes.
  
  It’s not naughty. It’s way lamer than that. It’s a contest that a coffee shop ..
  
  Actually **** it.
  
  It’s naughty.
  
  
  
  6. We’ve Been Jealous Of Someone Else’s Toboggan.
  
  A ‘toboggan’ is a nice wooden snow sled.
  
  When I grew up, I had to go sledding using the lid of a garbage can.
  
  So maybe this one’s just for me.
  
  cl-series
  
  7. We Think ‘Beaver Tail’ Is Delicious.
  
  A beaver tail is a pastry, covered in syrup, ice cream, cream, and some fruit that we pick off it because it’s all gross and healthy.
  
  8. Our Parents Have Tied Our Mittens Together With A String So We Don’t Lose Them.
  
  My mom would tie my “wool gloves” together and put them through my winter jacket so I didn’t lose them.
  
  This seemed like a good idea.
  
  But since they were pink and I was a freaking boy, mom I doubt they’d go unnoticed.
  
  9. We Were Raised, In Part, By Mr. Dressup.
  
  I’m twenty-nine, so this might not be true of older Canadians. Or like, super hot college chicks who think I’m all old and gross now because they don’t know who Mr Dressup is.
  
  Mr Dress Up sawed through the hearts of many Canadian kids.
  Mr Dressup sawed through the hearts of many Canadian kids.
  
  10. We Grow Playoff Beards. (Not The Women) (Hopefully)
  
  During hockey playoffs, players will not shave. So when they win the Stanley Cup, it looks like Hamas is playing for the New Jersey Devils.
  
  For some bizarre reason, some fans who support the team, decide to grow beards too.
  
  Don’t ask.
  
  I look like I’m in Hamas even in the off season.
  
  brothersniedermayer_beard
  
  11. We Are Angry That We Can’t Watch The Same Commercials As Americans During The Superbowl.
  
  Instead of the cool commercials everyone talks about, we get “Tom Ford’s Nissan Dealership, Now Open In Bolton”.
  
  Your name’s Tom Ford, douchebag.
  
  Pick the right car company.
  
  12. We Know Where To Get Good Poutine.
  
  Because it is the nectar of our people.
  
  —
  
  For the last three, I asked some friends of Tremendous News for help. Here they are.
  
  13. When We Hear “In The Five-hole” And “Spending Some Time In The Box”, We Don’t Think Dirty.
  
  It’s hockey. It’s pure. It’s our game.
  
  Alex Ruiz, Calgary Flames TV.
  
  14. We Give Directions Using Liquor Stores And Beer Stores As Geographical Benchmarks.
  
  Ok, you know the beer store at Jane and Dundas? Go east until you get to the liquor store then take a right.
  
  Jeff Marek, Hockey Night In Canada Radio.
  
  15. Canadians Never Think Anywhere Is Cold Outside Of Canada
  
  Whaaaa? This isn’t cold. Winter of ’94, my eyelids froze shut, and I still walked to school.
  
  
  
  
  

quote: (post)

Originally posted by Moosey
Hahahaha...whatever man. We're the most self deprecating nation in the world.

quote: (post)

Originally posted by Bardock42
"We Canadians are the best, we don't even need air freshener, we just fart in every room cause we love the smell"

quote: (post)

Originally posted by Bardock42
But really, I do like Canada, and Canadians...present company excluded, of course.

It's like a more pleasant United States.

quote: (post)

Originally posted by Moosey
Understandable. I'm a prick.

Agreed. And for the record, I find it hard to believe that we are more industrious than Germans, present company excluded.