Of course not (you "forgot" the child I mentioned, who often has quite the energy for standing).
A few years back I was on a bus, sitting across from a live-action version of the Simpson Comic Book Guy: he was two-seats huge, had long hair, and was reading comics. He dropped one, and I started to get up to get it for him, figuring it would be easier for me to do so (I was half his size and athletic; does this make me "weightist"?). He looked at me, smiled and said, "That's okay, thanks," and he proceeded to pick the comic off the floor himself. As he straightened up, he looked at me again, smiled and nodded. He appreciated the gesture of kindness.
The world needs more kindness, no? What it certainly doesn't need more of is...
If they ain't J-Lo or Kim K calibre, they're getting their own doors.
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Shinier than a speeding bullet.
So why do you give your seat to otherwise perfectly healthy women, but not otherwise perfectly healthy men?
If you do give your seat to perfectly healthy men, then you basically give your seat up to everybody, in which case you're not being chivalrous and your anecdote isn't really relevant to this topic.
__________________
"The Daemon lied with every breath. It could not help itself but to deceive and dismay, to riddle and ruin. The more we conversed, the closer I drew to one singularly ineluctable fact: I would gain no wisdom here."
Last edited by Tzeentch on Aug 7th, 2014 at 09:57 PM
While I'm sure the air smells so much sweeter on your high horse is there any reason why you give up your seat to healthy women?
No, not tremendously fat or old or crippled or anything (and the reason I didn't mention the child is because you gave a reason for giving up your seat that wasn't about them being physically disadvantaged), just a normal, perfectly healthy woman.
Young, healthy women are least likely to get my seat. On them, I like to enforce the equality...except when I feel like being a gentleman. And they always accept.
I'd offer you my seat.
Healthy men are my physical peers. But I'd offer you my seat too.
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Shinier than a speeding bullet.
Last edited by Mindship on Aug 8th, 2014 at 01:50 AM
I'm flattered, though if you'd basically offer your seat to anyone, with old people and the disabled getting priority, that's not really chivalrous so much as it's being a nice person in general.
__________________
"The Daemon lied with every breath. It could not help itself but to deceive and dismay, to riddle and ruin. The more we conversed, the closer I drew to one singularly ineluctable fact: I would gain no wisdom here."
Gender: Unspecified Location: With Cinderella and the 9 Dwarves
Chivalry, at least in the way I think it is generally used, is sexist. And, I disagree with Bentley, I think all sexism is bad (however, I think that may stem from different definitions of sexism, more so than a real disagreement).
Now a general politeness not based on any sexist assumptions of gender, and treating everyone with respect and kindness, is a good thing. And, imo, we should strive towards living our lives in accordance with that (to a reasonable degree, of course).
That's only Chivalry in the context of this thread if you're doing it because she's a woman.
If you're doing it because she's obviously struggling with the weight, then it's just helping a physically weak person out. Someone who considers themselves a "nice guy" wouldn't just help out a woman if she's struggling to lift the suitcase, they'd do the same for a 100 pound beltway pansy of a man as well. Similarly, if the woman is strong enough to hoist the load/is a lesbian, I don't see why you'd offer to help them with something they can obviously do themselves and with no issue.
Just curious... why being a lesbian makes woman capable to carry heavy things?
I can take care of myself, but It's always welcomed when someone is willing to help. and that being some handsome guy is an extra value
but seriously, recently it's more common to see another girl helping and guys pretending to have back pain
I don't necessarily see being nice as a separate issue. My first thought when I saw this thread was, "So now what? I can't do something nice for a woman without being labelled? More political correctness gone amuck?" Hell wit dat. Back to basics for me with golden rule in hand.
As Bardock mentioned, a definition of chivalry might've been helpful. For example: "chivalry - I'm a man, you're a woman. By virtue of that fact alone, I am superior to you, physically, morally, etc. Therefore, it is my duty to be nice to you, to protect you, and so on." That's sexist, and can have negative consequences elsewhere (eg, "I need servicing, woman!").
OTOH, if chivalry means helping someone who may have a tougher time with a task/situation, or simply following the golden rule (eg, holding a door for a man/woman, giving a woman my seat, helping the pansy man lift a heavy suitcase), then, no, I don't see this as "-ist" in any fashion.
For what it's worth, I have my share of "**** them" moments. And while in the throes of an anger fantasy -- and especially if I act-out ("Hold your own goddamn door") -- I feel deserving and empowered. But afterwards, once the fog of war has lifted from my brain, I feel bad, because that's not the type of person I want to be. I don't like when my anger and egotism get the better of me.
The world needs more kindness, and fortunately, life provides endless opportunities to "get it right" the next time.
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Shinier than a speeding bullet.
Last edited by Mindship on Aug 8th, 2014 at 11:49 AM
Well, considering that a definition of chivalry was provided...
Yeah, "being nice to everybody in general" is an entirely separate concept and topic.
__________________
"The Daemon lied with every breath. It could not help itself but to deceive and dismay, to riddle and ruin. The more we conversed, the closer I drew to one singularly ineluctable fact: I would gain no wisdom here."
Last edited by Tzeentch on Aug 8th, 2014 at 09:04 PM