Been hearing rumors about a Harry Potter rpg. Hope it's true.
__________________ Chicken Boo, what's the matter with you? You don't act like the other chickens do. You wear a disguise to look like human guys, but you're not a man you're a Chicken Boo.
Postmodernism at its core is skepticism about modernism, or the notion that everything can be reduced to materialism and can therefore, be physically observed, qualified, and quantified.
Only, puberty blockers aren't a small decision. it's a rather large and permanent decision
__________________ posted by Badabing
I don't know why some of you are going on about being right and winning. Rob and Impediment were in on this gag because I PMed them. Silent and Rao PMed me and figured I changed the post. I highly doubt anybody thought Quan made the post, but simply played along just for the lulz.
Stop playing chess against your own brain. You are just being pedantic. There are terms that describe what you are describing. That you do not find them particularly gratifying does not mean they are not useful. That is why language exists, so we can have a shared mode of transmitting and decoding abstract thought.
I see. I had a trans-man friend who experienced similar fear of "not passing." I think some trans people feel pressure to be unwavering bastions of masculinity/femininity so they can be accepted. I always wondered why he felt the need to appear hyper "dude-like" constantly. I didn't quite grasp my CIS privilege at that time: I'm comfortable showing feminine interests because I was born male, so I don't have to worry about having my maleness questioned, outside of jokes. I hope trans people become more comfortable displaying their full range of masculine/feminine expression, but society would have to change a bit before that.
Anyway, you're certainly entitled to your experiences and I wouldn't force a label onto anyone. I'm trying to better understand you though, so forgive me if I'm off on any of this.
If I understand correctly, you actually would prefer to live as a woman, but often feel pressured by the world around you to do otherwise, like with your job?
Last edited by StyleTime on Jun 11th, 2020 at 03:01 AM
I already went over this: much of the trans community would state that I am a transwoman in denial (an 'egg', using modern trans terminology). Hence 'technically', as that technicality could put me in that box, despite me disagreeing. I agree with you that I am not, but many would disagree with us. Others would agree, but that's because, again, the rhetoric in the TRA community changes frequently and thus a consensus on actual, 'true' definitions is hard to ascertain (which, again, is clearly symptomatic of postmodern thought).
Also note that I have my own specific definition of 'trans-gender', not transwoman; I believe my word usage makes this clear, but apologies if it wasn't clear enough for you. I invite you to reread our discussion from the start so as to help you understand.
The whole point of this gender identity stuff is that you're meant to find something that is gratifying to you, though, so why should I conform to something that I think is unhelpful? Your perspective on this is weird, and strangely hostile. I'm going to stop engaging with you now, no offense but I don't really see myself gaining any leeway with you; you'll refute anything I say.
Yeah, the whole thing of passing is complicated. For me, it's heavily more just that I'm a person who's never liked getting social attention in any form — I tend to dress and present as ordinary as possible, so to avoid such attention. My desire to fully pass is more born of that than anything: if I appeared more gender non-conforming, then people would look at me and possibly scrutinise me. It's the same reason I don't dye my hair. Hence, when I'm presenting female, I try to look as much like an 'ordinary' woman as possible, and avoid talking to people whenever I can (my 'femme voice' is not convincing).
Don't worry about it, usually most of this is internalised so it's interesting typing it out.
It's more that I'd just prefer to have been born a woman, than anything. As I said, I've come to terms with my masculine side and enjoy expressing that side of me too, through wearing 'typical' male clothing such as suit and tie combos, and I just think that fits my job role best. I don't feel that much pressure from the world, really. I'm incredibly lucky to live in a liberal area, have accepting parents and friends, etc., so that has naturally influenced the way I approach it — I think if one receives more active kickback, that might necessitate a decision to be more brazen and open about it, as a social and personal statement. As it is for me, I'm able approach it fairly lackadaisically.
Environment is obviously highly important when it comes to this issue — for some people, passing can be the matter of life or death, and some people don't have the luxury of being able to pass at all. I believe that as a trans person I am incredibly privileged, and that that privilege has influenced my approach deeply: another clear example of that is that I don't have to pick a name for my identity because I'm not being dehumanised.
Anyway, I'm kind of going on a bit here, I'll leave it there for now. I don't mind your questioning so please do ask anything you want clarified or expounded upon.
@Adam_PoE: If you really want to label me with a useful term that decodes this abstract line of thought, then I suppose you could just use 'gender non-conforming'; it's fairly broad but also an accurate descriptive term, and it sidesteps a lot of the more murky BS. Does that satiate you?
Labels are communication shortcuts. My only point is there are lots of labels that could accurately be applied to someone that they would not particularly find gratifying, but would still apply to them nonetheless. If there is a label that describes something, it describes something.
Yeah, we agree there.
We also agree here mostly, I just don't find any of the established labels to be effective for me or describe me specifically all that well. Most of them are tied up in ideology and have too many connotations. I'm just happy to be a male-bodied human being person, but you could probably apply 'gender non-conforming', or 'gender fluid' to me, as well as 'non-binary', etc., but idk man, I wouldn't call myself those things, nor would I be offended if you chose to refer to me as them.
Like I said, I'm pretty easy with it, call me whatever you like as long as it's not something intentionally derogatory. (please log in to view the image)
Pressure from the world around you doesn't have to mean fear of physical violence. I'd argue fear of not passing still stems from other's reactions to you, even if not outwardly hostile: you feel like they won't acknowledge you as a woman deep down, so you feel pressured to conform.
Where I get confused is that you've stated you'd prefer to have been born female, or at least present female fulltime. It sounds like you've resigned yourself to sometimes presenting male out of necessity(like performing your job without drawing attention), rather than any desire to be a man. Have you ever felt like you are a transwoman, but need to rationalize your identity away up over fears of not always passing?
I agree 100% with Adam here. People use the same reasoning to reject "atheist", despite literally being atheists. Bisexuals sometimes avoid the term entirely, sometimes due to how both homo/hetero crowds/partners react to it.
It doesn't make the terms any less applicable though.
Last edited by StyleTime on Jun 11th, 2020 at 07:29 PM
I’m passable when I am in femme attire, but someone will notice at some point or another that I have certain androgynous traits not typically aligned with being female, i.e my height (I’m 6’1), body structure, etc. I do not have a prominent Adam’s apple and my body type is naturally slender. Honestly though, I couldn’t give two shits about being passable. I’m just here to have a good time and look cute while doing it.
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