Stormbreaker Review
by Tim Voon (winklebeck AT hotmail DOT com)October 14th, 2006
Stormbreaker 2006
A film review by Timothy Voon
Copyright 2006 Timothy Voon
1 out of 5 stars
Starring: Alex Pettyfer, Ewan McGregor, Mickey Rourke, Bill Nighy, Sophie Okonedo, Alicia Silverstone, Missi Pyle, Sarah Bolger, Ashley Walters, Damian Lewis
Directed by Geoffrey Sax
Produced by Steve Christian, Andreas Grosch, Marc Samuelson, Peter Samuelson
Written by Anthony Horowitz
This movie is sadly disappointing, considering it has such a promising cast. Primarily, the problem lies with the fact that it cannot decide whether it is a serious or a fun action movie, or whether it is catering more for a child or an adult audience. It kinda lingers somewhere in the lukewarm world of in between fun-serious, until the tension of the movie is lost to a bewildered and bored audience. This uncertainty leaves you unsure of whether to laugh or cry for the young hero Alex Pettyfer.
It isn't as fun as 'Agent Cody Banks' or as innovative as 'Spy Kids' and fails as a junior 'James Bond' by a long shot. When this teenage spy boy, becomes action hero, we get a puddle of missed punches and kicks that gives the audience a sad case of abdominal cramps brought on mostly by boredom!
A lot of the problem lies with the main star 'Alex Pettyfer' who plays the teen action hero. Unfortunately, the film revolves around him and he is unable to hold the centre stage with any conviction and fails to captivate the heart of the audience. He has model looks, pretty-boy face that is better suited to 'Vogue' magazine than action flick. In fact, much of the shots of him are of his hair swept back perfectly whether he is hanging over the edge of a building, or clinging to a helicopter or being tortured. Unfortunately, a lot of the great acting talent in the forms of Robbie Coltrane and Stephen Fry are lost in very minor roles, and are hardly worth mentioning. Alicia Silverstone is wasted as the ditty housekeeper come nanny, and joins the long line of pretty faces in this film.
The storyline is ludicrous and appalling!
Alex's uncle (Ewan McGregor) is an adult spy who gets murdered on a tour of duty whilst investigating Darrius Sale (Mickey Rourke) a self made billionaire. MI6 secret service needs a replacement and blackmails 14 year old Alex into working for them, or they will deport his nanny (Alicia Silverstone).
At this moment in time, I'm frickin tearing my hair out wandering why the British government secret service agency is blackmailing a child to work for them by using his nanny as collateral !!! This is cinema at its worse form, and for the sake of entertainment, we get blatant child abuse flaunted in front of us.
Alex gets sent to boot training camp where he beats the crap out of the army officers, before being sent to investigate the evil Darrius Sale who is trying to kill all the children in London schools through his supercomputer system 'Stormbreaker'. The reason that Darrius is doing this is because he was bullied as a child, and wants to get revenge on all the children of England.
Fickle, fickle, fickle!
Timothy Voon
Email - [email protected]
Web - http://us.imdb.com/ReviewsBy?Tim+Voon
Originally posted in the rec.arts.movies.reviews newsgroup. Copyright belongs to original author unless otherwise stated. We take no responsibilities nor do we endorse the contents of this review.
