POTC Therapy Thread: Sparrabethers Anonymous for KMC Members

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savvysparrowluv
An idea I got from Tee_Pirategirl. We all (most likely) need some serious therapy. This is meant to be a fun POTC Group Therapy spoof for us to play with wink

E.g. (Written by Tee)

We need to open a sorta Sparrabethers anonymous club or somethinglike THAT'LL help)

Tee: Hi I'm tee!
Everyone: Hi Tee!
Tee: I'm addicted to Sparrabeth.
Psychiatrist lady: Now now Tee! Here we use drugs by their REAL name...that's the first step to recovery.
Tee: Fine! I'm addicted to the Elizabeth Swann and Captain Jack Sparrow pairing happy?
psychiatrist lady: not really. Now let us beging by doing an excercise...I think the main reason you all like this drug is that you find this Jack Sparrow character-
Everyone: CAPTAIN! CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow.
PL: Fine! You find this captain Jack character attractive-
Tigers: How can we not? Jack/Johnny is the most beautiful, handsome-
PL: Let's get the focus off this guy and think about something else. Like that other guy...Will was it?
T.Maria: The whelp? He has the emotional range of a teaspoon.
PL: I see some anger there. Why do you think that is?
joanjoan: I'm bored! We should go stalk Johnny now. This is stupid.
Everyone: AYE!!
PL: Wait wait! I think we should try to like the WE pairing now, it'll help you forget the JE pairing. If you just watch some clips of WE you'll change your mind-AHHHHHH! *everyone throws tomatoes at her*
Diva: We got enough WE in AWE thanks very much!
Tee: Right! Let's go see if we can find T&T and beat the crap out of them.
savvysparrowluv: OOOH! This means I can use that Jack sword replica I bought from Disney store.
Jaeh: Can we go steal Johnny's underwear after we beat the writer's up?
Everyone: HELL YAAAAAA!

Please, come and play! Write your own skit! big grin big grin

The truth will set us free wink

Tramps Lady
ooh, i like this...

Tramps: Hi! im tramps.
Everyone: Hi tramps.
Tramps: Im addicted to getting anything that johnny has touched from johnny himself
everyone looks at her
Tramps: What!? its called collecting!
Psychiatrist: cant you collect something normal...like........shells?
Tramps: shells!? you exp.....Hey! Mina! come back here with my johnny saliva pillow!
Mina: Over my dead body!
Tramps: Okay! *pulls out dagger*
Psychiatrist: Okay, calm down....what has the world come to!?
Tramps: Obeying johnny!
Everyone: Amen to that!
Psychiatrist: What about beckett!?
Everyone stares....10 seconds later a huge storm of laughter
Jaeh: You gotta be kidding me!
Everyone throws balony at the psychiatrist
Tramps: Why the hell did are we here? we're perfectly normal!
Diva: yeah, just obsessed people!
Tramps: Mina, i want my johnny fallen into cake back!
Diva: yeah...um...i kinda ate it....
Tramps: You what!!!!!!!!????

willofthewisp
Great idea! About time we all supported each other.

Willo: Hi, I'm Willo and I'm a sparrabether
All: Hi, Willo
Willo: I know I say I'm okay with willabeth and I am, but all it takes is a well written fic or a gorgeous youtube video, or just looking into Jack Sparrow's eyes and I go for this couple all over again.
Psychiatrist: Do you ever imagine yourself in the Elizabeth role?
Willo: Nope, no, usually, I just want to watch them do it.
(Everyone coughs at the bluntness of the statement)
Psychiatrist: I see.
Willo: Wish I could.
Psychiatrist: No, that's not what I mean. Um, do you fantasize about any other couples?
Willo: In the POTC world? Sometimes norribeth, but once again, all it takes is the Curiosity scene and I'm right back rooting for my couple.
Psychiatrist: Willo, I want you to look at this picture of naked James Woods for a while. That should quench any lust you feel.
(Willo makes a valiant attempt)
Willo: Ok, I've decided that you have problems. Who wants to watch DMC?

Tramps Lady
lmao. that was hilariousbig grin

savvysparrowluv
Rofl!! Great job, girls!

savvysparrowluv
Alright, my turn.

Savvy: Hi, I'm Savvysparrowluv. But everyone calls me Savvy.
Everyone: Hi Savvy.
Psychiatrist Lady: Hello Savvy, dear.
Savvy: And I'm a Sparrabether...
PL: *mumbles* Here we go...
Savvy:...as well as obsessed with anything POTC or Johnny Depp.
PL: Now, Savvy. You know the rules. We don't like to use the term "obsessed". We prefer the term "Mental Health Consumer". Okay?
Everybody: Whatever...
Tramps: I object to that statement.
Everybody: *stares*
Tramps: What? I can have an opinion, right Savvy?
Savvy: Testify my pirate sister!
PL: Now, Savvy, what do you think is the root of your obsession? Because I have a feeling that you also find this nasty dirty rogue pirate guy rather attractive, thats why you want him to pair up with Elizabeth Swann.
Savvy: Nasty? *pulls out replica sword* Oh no you didn't...
Jaeh: *pulls out replica pistol* He's not nasty! He's the hottest ...
Tramps: Dreamiest...
Diva: Gorgeous...
Tigers: Sexiest...
Tex: Manly...
Savvy: AWEsome pirate to sail the seas, lady! *brandishes sword*
Everyone: Yeah!
Willo: We don't always have to want to be Elizabeth to want Sparrabeth, you know!
Savvy: Yeah, she *does heart fingers* Completes him.
Everyone: Awwwww....
PL: Well, I can understand that you all are no doubt hard core romantics, but do you think your posistion as a mental health consumer might be due to your own lack of a similar romance?
Everyone: LETS GET HER! *beats PL with replica POTC items*
Savvy: We won't stop until you cry "Uncle Captain Jack Sparrow" Mwahaha!!!

katelovespirate
hahahaha.... i love this thread. smile

savvysparrowluv
Kate, you should write one! You're so good at this type of thing! smile

lovethemtigers
okay....my introduction....

LTT: Hi, my name is lovethemtigers, but just call me Tigers for short.
Pysch: And what brings you to this group, my dear?
LTT: I am a hardcore Sparrabether. It's been 5 months since the release of AWE and I still can't leave this alone. I mean, all I really wanted was to see Jack and Elizabeth make out.....and show more hot passion like they did in the Kiss of Death scene.
Pysch: Why do you think you want this so bad?
LTT: Well, to be honest, I hate to admit it...but I'm a huge Johnny fan...a "fangirl" so to speak (everyone in unison say "uhhhhh!"wink and just to see Johnny in a romantic role drives me crazy.
Pysch: And what are your feelings about William Turner.
LTT: Did you really have to bring his name up. WE ARE TALKING ABOUT SPARRABETH. I hate hearing the Whelp's name...in my fantasy Pirate world, he doesn't exist.
Pysch: Do you ever fantasize that you are Elizabeth?
LTT: Well, as a matter of fact I do and I imagine what it would be like to be with Captain Jack Sparrow......mostly at night when I'm in bed!
Pysch: I see....well, it's obvious you do have a problem. These meetings may help you to find release...that is if you truly want to be free from this obsession....
LTT: Well, then, that's the one million dollar question isn't? Do I really want to be rid of this obsession? Sometimes I'm convinced the answer is no...but hey the first step to recovery is admitting that you have a problem...and there is no doubt I have a problem. I eat, drink, breath and dream of Sparrabeth. every day, every night. I just can't seem to stop thinking about them...and how great AWE could have been if only.....

I really don't feel any better.......All I want is Sparrabeth and it's never going to happen! WhaaaaWhaaaa Whaaa

JCapt Jaeh_K.S
*raises hand* my turn!

Jaeh: Hey, I'm Jaeh. And I'm here for my bloody therapy session. *pretends to cooperate*
Psych: So... Jaeh.. why do you think your friends brought you here? *indicates the friends who dragged her over*
Jaeh: They say that... GAH! I DON'T NEED THERAPY!
Psych: THat's the first reaction to all this dear... Denial.
Jaeh: *sighs* alright. I'm obsessed with Jack Sparrow and POTC in General. Especially Johnny Depp! I'm okay with the other ships, but Sparrabeth is like.. THE BEST! It has chemistry and the two are perfect for each other and everything else!
Psych: I see. We DO have a problem. Have you ever, tried focusing your addiction on something else? Like, Will Turner?
Jaeh: What's wrong with you? Why do you keep pushing Will on us?! The whelp is.. so.. whelp-y. Okay, I just realized how bad that sounded, but it's true!
Psych: How about Orlando Bloom?
Jaeh: Well, he's okay, but he'll never EVER get close to Johnny's status of.. hotness.. *sighs dreamily*
Psych: Have you ever tried focusing on Willabeth?
JAeh: I SAID STOP THE WHELP MADNESS! *clubs the psych with a replica pistol.. everyone joins in*

lol, I just made myself sound like a war freak. O.O

savvysparrowluv
ROFL!!! *huggles Jaeh*

Nah, not a war freak - just a normal sparrabether wink

Tramps Lady
i seem to get stared at quite alot in these:P....okay...twice..but stillbig grin

savvysparrowluv
Lol stick out tongue

Tramps Lady
and yes savvy, i did object to that statement:P

savvysparrowluv
stick out tongue I know what you mean, I'm glad I got you right though wink. Who wants to be called a "mental health consumer" , lol?

Tramps Lady
*looks at jaeh*:P

Tramps Lady
i was just thinking, i had the perfect one for mina...shall i?lol

savvysparrowluv
ooh, do it! do it! big grin

Sifzensinril
Sif: Hello, I'm Sifzensinril
Psych: welcome, Sif-what?
Sif: call me Sif, alright
PL: so what brings you here, Sif?
Sif: I'm huge fan of Sparrabeth... and I'm proud of it. I see Sparrabeth signs in many places?
PL: How can you see them if Sparrabeth isn't real couple?
Sif: I se.. Sparrabeth isn't real couple??? It's madness! Do you love Sparrabeth?
PL: No
All: *louder than PL* AYE
Sif: See, it's real
PL: Just mental health consumers like you. Have you ever thought about Willabeth ship, better that that Sparrabeth one?
Sif: I have made two wallpapers for my Willabeth friends, but I don't like Will himself and if I didn't like Will himself, because he has really stupid actions like make promises that can never fulfil, but his kissing actions are much more worse, he never kiss when he should, and his death was terrible, he had said he would die for her, it was only one promise he fulfiled, but he died for his slowness, so how can he protect her, have you ever thought about it, I could have never like Willabeth, because after all Lizzie doesn't deserve an eunuch.
All: Savvy.
PL: can you repeat it once more again and slowly?
Sif: I just thought it's me who needs your help, but if you don't understand simple words, how can you help?

---
I tried

JCapt Jaeh_K.S
Originally posted by Tramps Lady
*looks at jaeh*:P

*covers face with a pillow* don't look at me! stick out tongue

Originally posted by Tramps Lady
i was just thinking, i had the perfect one for mina...shall i?lol

totally!

*sigh* I miss mina.

Originally posted by savvysparrowluv
stick out tongue I know what you mean, I'm glad I got you right though wink. Who wants to be called a "mental health consumer" , lol?

mental health consumer... *shivers*

Originally posted by savvysparrowluv
ROFL!!! *huggles Jaeh*

Nah, not a war freak - just a normal sparrabether wink

lol thanks... my muse woke up.. lol, when i was about to sleep!

lol.. we all the clubbed the shrink!

Originally posted by Sifzensinril

I tried

It's funny sif!!! ESPECIALLY THE LAST PART.. rofl!

Tramps Lady
okay, one for mina:P


------------------------------------------
Mina: Hey! Im mina!
Everyone: Hi, Mi-
Mina: And I like selling Johnny stuff of eBay!
PL: Okay, miss perky-pants-
Mina: Perky-pants!? Im perky, and all you could come up with was... Perky-pants!?
Everyone bursts out laughs
Mina: Shut yer gobs!
PL: We obviously have a little problem here...
Diva: LITTLE!? i think you mean Mina-sized problem!
Jaeh: Cant we all just give the girl a break?
Tramps: No! she stole my cake, and my pillow!
PL: Okay, oka---what?
Tramps: You...dont really wanna know
Pocky: Heheheheh, perky pants:P
Mina: Can someone just talk to me!?
PL: Okay, Mina, was it? Now, how much do you sell these things for?
Mina: First off, dont you dare forget my name in the future, and it'll usually be about $38,000
everybody stares
Mina: did i mention...i like to hump anything johnny/jack related?
everyones still staring
Mina: What? c'mon, you cant tell me you havnt imagined it in your lifetime?
Sif: Yeah, we have...just......nah..never mind
Savvy: I just cant believe you said that!
Sif: The sad thing is, that she does do that
Jaeh: i wonder what would happen, if we took her to the premiere of POTC 3...
everybody backs away from jaeh and shudders
Mina: Can we!? Can we!?
Tramps: Im sorry to say this...but...we already went...and johnny spat on the velvet rope...and now its in my bedroom
Willo: What has this world come to!?
T.Maria: No idea....*strokes beard*...WTF!?
Mina starts to walk out to get the rope
Tramps: Not so fast, savvy.
Tramps is holding a great big pistol
Mina: Maybe I should run now...
Jaeh: Yeah, i think so:P
PL: Why didnt i choose the teagueabeth course?
Willo: Oh, no! Thats the worst *shudders*...wai-
T.Maria: Wait, theres an ACTUAL course for that ship?
Mina: When was this ship made up...I want in!:P

Tramps Lady
^^^probs not a good one..in my eyes atleast:P

PirateDiva
LMAO!!! laughing My Turn!

Diva: Hello my name is PirateDiva, but Diva for short.
Everyone: Hello Diva!
PL: Well Diva What brings you here
Diva: I'm In Love With SPARRABETH! I Love Them and it pains me that they are not together. I gave my heart fully to Sparrabeth and when the writers so brutelly denied us a Jack and Liz ending I felt my heart break. My heart went out to Jack and Lizzie when they kiss in Dead Mans Chest, well actually since he rescued her from the Bay in Port Royal and when AWE was released and i saw the massacre of the ending and no Sparrabeth my heart broke into a million pieces and i have never been able to rebuild my heart since then.....is it possible to die from a broken heart?
Everyone: Awwww!
Tigers: We know how u feel.....those writers those dam fools will never know what they've done to us.
savvysparrowluv: yes we are right here with u
PL:In Love with them you say?
Diva: (nodds)
PL: Those are strong words there, how can u possibly be in love with Fictional Characters?
Everyone: HOW CAN YOU NOT!!!?
Diva: Their passion is something beyond this world! Something we can all relate too! That forbidden love! That one person u know ur not suppose to love but u do anyway!! So u see Jack and Lizzie are not fictional...they are real! They live in out hearts! They are the story of our lives! The passion we want to feel! To breathe!
PL: (picks up her clip board and fans herself) Oh my! Sounds intriquing!
Everyone: (stares at PL in shock)
Willo: What do u mean "sounds intriquing"? Do u mean to tell us you've never seen...Sparrabeth moments?
PL: (suddenly looks nervous) N-No!
gasps are heard all around
Diva: What? Alright that does it! (pulls out laptop and begins showing PL Sparrabeth Videos, Fan Fics, Clips from the movies, siggys, pictures etc...and they all watch in awe) I DARE you to Tell Me thats NOT LOVE!!
PL: (fans herself some more, with tears in her eyes) I never realized how beautiful they are together! I-I need to see more!
Everyone smiles at her!
PL: Hello Everyone I'm your former Psychiatrist Lady! PL for short and I have a problem I'm mental health consumer of SPARRABETH!!
Everyone: (Cheers) Huzzah Huzzah Huzzah!!
Tigers: Another Victory!
Savvy: another Sparrabether!
Diva: Guess this isnt therapy, it's a fanclub! Oo Oo!! can i be President!!! big grin

PirateDiva
I do need therapy and I need it fast!! last weekend I went to San Franscico and was away from the computer for 2 days and i almost had a meltdown because I couldnt get my Sparrabeth of Johnny fix! and on Friday i'm leaving for 5 days to vacation in Mexico and im sure there will be no computer so I'll for sure be pulling my hair out!! HELP!!!

JCapt Jaeh_K.S
ROFL! yay you turned another!!! YAY US!

Tramps Lady
cant breathe...i read out loud too fast:P

To Freedom
Psychiatrist: So, why do you need therapy?
Freedom: Er....
Psychiatrist: It's okay, I know it's hard for you...
Freedom: Er...
Psychiatrist: Take your time.
Freedom: Er...
Psychiatrist: Let's go through your history then.
Freedom: Er...er...(keeps fiddling with fingers and looks around as if someone is tapping her on her shoulder)

That's why I need therapy.

Tramps Lady
Er....lmao?...er....yeah:P

Sifzensinril
Tramps, I love your Mina :P

JCapt Jaeh_K.S
Originally posted by To Freedom
Psychiatrist: So, why do you need therapy?
Freedom: Er....
Psychiatrist: It's okay, I know it's hard for you...
Freedom: Er...
Psychiatrist: Take your time.
Freedom: Er...
Psychiatrist: Let's go through your history then.
Freedom: Er...er...(keeps fiddling with fingers and looks around as if someone is tapping her on her shoulder)

That's why I need therapy.


I don't wonder lol. stick out tongue

Tramps Lady
thanks sif...thought id put the humping in...then i thought of the ebayness:P

Sifzensinril
I miss Mina

JCapt Jaeh_K.S
Me too. sad

Tramps Lady
Yeah, i have her on MSN, but shes always busy....ill take alook now....

JCapt Jaeh_K.S
alright...

Tramps Lady
she was in shower...i just forgot to postbig grin

and...now...shes...offlinesad

PirateDiva
I just spoke to MINA via TXT!!!! Love That GiRl!! She is in Skool at the moment!! smile

tee_pirategirl
OH I miss her so much. Can you convince her to check on us from time to time? Cause I miss her Orbitz moments.

Anyways even though my post is already on the first page I thought I'd post a few more episodes just to keep things going and keep the thread alive.


Episode one
Tee *with puffy eyes and blowing nose in a napkin*: So anyways I thought I was better cause I went a whole 14 hours without getting my Sparrabeth fix and I felt okay and I even went an ENTIRE hour without thinking of Sparrabeth...and then I left the Psych hospital *sniffs* and guess what I saw?
PL: Plz tell us Tee!
Tee: *cries* There was a pretty pond in front of the hospital with a Swan in it and at that exact moment a Sparrow flew over the pond and I swear *sniffs* I saw the Swan look at the Sparrow with longing in its eyes.
Everyone: AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!
PL: Ummmm....What did you do then?
Tee: I broke down and started chasing the Sparrow. I was determined to make it realize it should stay with the Swan but the stupid *sniff* bird *sniff* was *sniff* *the rest blurted out in tears* bay blooo blast and bree!! *cries*
*Everyone hugs Tee*
Tigers: In case you didn't catch that last bit it was "way too fast and free."
PL: Oh!


Episode two

PL: I've decided you should spend some time with a fan from a different ship in order to realize how absurd your so called 'obsession' is.
*locks Tee in with a Han/Leia fan*
*Two hours later*
Han/Leia Fan(HLF):...and so all Jack ever wanted to do was to give her a taste of freedom.
Tee: Exactly!! Wow. You catch on real quick...it took me more than a year to get where you are now. You got some potential. My friends would love to meet you.
HLF: You're too kind. Shall we sneak out, buy some rum and watch the Sparrabeth parts of DMC?
Tee *wipes proud tears from eyes*: They grow up so fast!

tee_pirategirl
Episode three

Tee *crying yet again*: The other day I broke down in the middle of Barnes and Noble cause I re-read the angsty Sparrabeth piece in the AWE novel.
Everyone: AWWWWWWWW!!
Diva *sniffles*: I know what you mean. I almost slapped the lady at the fast food place cause she said they were out of 'freedom' fries...not 'french' fries...'freedom' fries! They were out of FREEDOM fries. *bowls* It's fine! I'm okay.
PL *in her calm collected voice*: Have you thought about drawing a line between fiction and reality perhaps-
Tigers: Have you thought about turning this place into a Sparrabeth fan club? I think that would work.
PL: Oh god have mercy on my soul!

Tramps Lady
lmao!

Sifzensinril
lol

JCapt Jaeh_K.S
Originally posted by tee_pirategirl
OH I miss her so much. Can you convince her to check on us from time to time? Cause I miss her Orbitz moments.


ditto.. yes




that was.. *sniffs* beautiful!




You guys don't know how Han and Leia fans obsess too, you know... but.. at least our(includes me.. but Sparrabeth still breaks my heart...) pairing came true.. *pats back* *wipes tear from own eyes* *sighs* SParrabeth...



poor PL lady.. stick out tongue



I'm making one when I get home from my 2 day vacation.. see y'all around!

Sifzensinril
I have seen Mina here on KMC, but now she's gone no

tee_pirategirl
Originally posted by JCapt Jaeh_K.S
ditto.. yes





You guys don't know how Han and Leia fans obsess too, you know... but.. at least our(includes me.. but Sparrabeth still breaks my heart...) pairing came true.. *pats back* *wipes tear from own eyes* *sighs* SParrabeth...



Oh trust me my best friend is a hardcore Han/Leia fan. As much as I'm Sparrabeth...At least one good pairing came true. If only Will and Elizabeth were siblings...EEEEEEEEEWWWWWW!!!

willofthewisp
This thread is too funny! clapping

(Willo goes into see the POTC shrink, Gore)

Gore: Your support group referred you to me, Willo.

Willo: They got to do what's right by them.

Gore: So what brings you to therapy?

Willo: One word, love: curiosity.

Gore: Okay, that's a common trait among sparrabethers. What was the first indication in your homelife that you were becoming obsessed?

Willo: We named the monkey Jack.

Gore: Uh huh...well...you seem hostile. Is anything wrong? Am I pissing you off?

Willo: Consider into your calculations that you robbed me of my wedding night.

Gore: Wait...are you just quoting lines from the movies?

Willo: (claps hands in a slow, sarcastic way) Drinks all around!

sailorleo
**leo walks in an wants to join the sparrabeth club**

I heard y'all had punch and pie?

savvysparrowluv
ROFL Willo!!! Love it, great quotes *does Jack bow*

Of course we've got *cough* rum-soaked* punch and chocolate skull pie big grin

Tramps Lady
lmao willo:P

JCapt Jaeh_K.S
Lol Willo!


... we also serve Norri dipped in chocolate leo... it's the PL's suggestion, to keep our minds off Johnny...

so far, no one's touched Norri... well, so far... stick out tongue


Originally posted by tee_pirategirl
Oh trust me my best friend is a hardcore Han/Leia fan. As much as I'm Sparrabeth...At least one good pairing came true. If only Will and Elizabeth were siblings...EEEEEEEEEWWWWWW!!!

scary when Luke and Leia kissed, and I already knew they were siblings then! shock

true, YUCK. I that flashed in there mind at some point, but they remembered they destroyed that connection in CotBP...

tee_pirategirl
LOL! Willo you slay me. This thread MUST go on. I'll do one ...But you guys have to keep going. This is beyond funny!

Episode Four
KMC girls -and PL lady- are sitting around a table sipping tea in a Beckett-manner. All the girls are dressed in traditional dresses.
Tee: Pass the sugar cubes please?
Jaeh: There you go!
Tigers: May I have the rum?
Willo: With breakfast?
Tigers: I watched DMC this morning.
Sighs of understanding go around the table.
Pl: Now ladies! What do you think triggered your addiction?
KMC girls consider the question but ignore PL.
Sifzensinril: That's actually a pretty good question.
Jaeh: I think it was the kiss.
Willo: Definitely the curiosity scene.
Tigers: Persuasion?
Tee: Curiosity?
PL: Ever considered that you might have made up this whole thing in your head?
Tee(whispers): I think there's something wrong with her.
Willo nods solemnly as she takes a sip of her tea: Poor thing! They say being a shrink gets to you after a while.
Jaeh also sips tea: Maybe she makes things up in her mind and therefor assumes others would do the same.
All the girls nod.
PL is getting nervous: I don't make things up in my mind!
Tee: Oh yeah?! Isn't it a bit odd that modern day girls are dressed in these garbs?
Jaeh pulls out a dead bat: And where would I get a dead bat? You're making it up in your head!
Tigers: So in answer to your question: no! We aren't making it up in our mind. Thousands of teens voted for this pairing in the choice awards. YOU are the one making things up.
Tramps: You also made up the fact that we need help.
savvysparrow: YOU need help.
PL is very worried now:I...I...I do?
Tee: Certainly! We should take you to the ward.
PL: You'd do that for me?
Tigers: Of course!
T.Maria: How could we abandon a sister in need?
KMC girls take hold of PL's elbows and walk her out of the room with encouraging words. When PL is finally in one of those pretty white rooms they wave to her through the window. They turn around and walk away and everyone bursts out laughing. They take their dresses off to reveal normal clothes.
Tee: Good one!
Willo: Rather creative I must say.
Jaeh: Johnny's dead bat that I bought from Chiki on ebay proved to be more than useful.
Sailorleo: Best was Tigers pretended depression from watching DMC in the morning.
Tigers: Dude! My heartbreak from the beautiful romance was real.
Tee: Wanna go watch DMC again anyways?
Tigers: Well DUH!!!

PirateDiva
Tee ur episodes are Hilarious!!! LMAO LMAO LMAO!!! laughing

and Willo i was literally ROTFLMAO!!! laughing OMG OMG!!! Im enjoying this thread very much!! Keep it alive!!! big grin

savvysparrowluv
LOL - love it Tee, so glad you updated - this thread totally needs to stay alive - its our only hope of recovery....or at least laughing at ourselves stick out tongue

Gah, i can't think of one right now - I'll try one soon!

Tramps Lady
lmao. i cant be stuffed thinkin of one now, its morning and im tired....wheres the rum: wink

JCapt Jaeh_K.S
Jaeh: *after curiosity scene* Guys, do you think we should let her out?
All: Why?
Jaeh: I think she makes things up in her mind to cope with the fact that she denies the existence of sparrabeth, and yet many people accepts the fact it existed. She's just scared and anxious about the real and true possibility that she had been wrong, and everyone knew she was, so she decided to turn it over and use it to her advantage and tried to get people into the same delusional state that says sparrabeth isn't for real.... I think that's her real problem.

*no response, crickets started to... sound(or something) in the background*

savvysparrow: *breaks the ice* since when did you get so analytical Jaeh?
tee: I think the shrink's rubbing off on her!

Jaeh: on contraire, her influence is... scary. Imagine life without sparrabeth! *shivers*

Tramps: I don't think I can.
Everyone nods in agreement...



-----


well.. I tried! hard! REALLY!

PirateDiva
LMAO!!! I could almost hear the crickets!!! lol

Tramps Lady
omg, same!!!:P and yes...i dont think i canbig grin

Sifzensinril
lol, tee, jaeh, it was so funny, I love it

savvysparrowluv
lol, great Jaeh - I got to break the ice? Woohoo! Happy Dance

KMC Girls and PL are sitting in a rocking chair circle with a stereo in the center.
PL: Okay, ladies! I went home and did some thinking, called my mother, and I've come to the conclusion that you are still the ones with wonky heads.
Jaeh: *teehee* She said Wonky...*giggles* Like Willy Wonka....Johnny...*sigh*
The girls all sigh together...
PL: Okay, moving on, today we are going to try musical therapy. Music is calming to the soul, the mind and senses. I'm going to play a little bit and I want you to tell me what it reminds you of. That will help me gain insight into your psyche...
T.Maria: Uh, who says we want you in our psyche?
PL: Well, it is helpful in your development....
Tigers: Look, lady. We're wasting time when we could be stalking Johnny. Just play the censored2 music!
PL looks scared, but plays music and sits back. A nice classical minuet plays.
Savvysparrowluv: This makes me think of a warm day aboard the Pearl, Jack and Elizabeth holding eachother in their arms as they watch the sun kiss the horizon as it rises into the sky....
Kate: It reminds me of them dancing in the starlight after their wedding...or wedding night
Girls have another round of sighs
PL: Lets try another one, shall we? How about a nice pop song...can't find much poetry in that....
PirateDiva: Um, haven't you ever heard of...gosh, I don't know....Lyrics?
PL ignores the aggitated Sparrabeths and puts on a pop song. Liz Phair "Why Can't I"
Tramps: OMG, this song is *so* obviously meant for Sparrabeth. *hums with song*
Tee: You're right, its totally a sparrabethy song. *sigh*
PL is getting very frustrated. Puts in a new CD. Lets try oldies...then we'll try something else if that doesn't work. I have faith in you, all of you. You can make it past this obession girls.
Savvy: You have faith in us, just like Lizzie did in Jack.
Sif: I'll never let go of Sparrabeth!
Tigers: NEVER!!!
PL: Take a deep breath... lets tune into the oldies station, that way its more random which song will play, okay? *tunes into radio*

"Love is a Battlefield" begins to play.

Willo: Ooh, I saw a sparrabeth video to this song!
Savvy: Me too, its such a perfect song for them.
Diva: JOHNNY!!!!!
*all look at PDiva*
Diva: *ahem* sorry, it bursts out at random moments.
*Girls nod in understanding*
PL: Thats it! You girls are all delusional! I'm taking some of my vacation time and going out of town for the day.
T.Maria: Girls, are we going to put up with this crap?
All the girls stand
T.Maria: I didn't think so.
Tigers: Lets kick it oldschool, girls.
All the girls attach their rockingchairs and create a big wood pile in the middle which they set fire to.
Savvy: Come on, Jaeh! Lets get it started!
Savvy & Jaeh: Yo ho, yo ho a pirates life for me!
*Girls begin dancing around fire and singing song*
Sif: Lets take some of the fire and burn AWE scripts!
All: Huzzah!
Willo: Then grab Terry and Ted and put 'em over the fire like they did to Jack!
All: Huzzah!
Tee: Lets get HER! *points to cowering PL*
All: Huzzah!

Sifzensinril
Huzzah, it was wonderful!!!

savvysparrowluv
Aw, thanks Sif big grin That was actually...quite liberating to write stick out tongue

Tramps Lady
that was soooooo coolbig grin

JCapt Jaeh_K.S
poor PL.. stick out tongue

burn them! burn them!

huzzah! AWEsomez post! happy

lovethemtigers
LOL...I havent read this thread in quite some time...I love how in Diva's therapy session we convinced the Pysh Lady to join our sparrabeth madness...and in Willo's session we had Gore as our therapist....

I'm not into writing this but you gals are doing wonderful...someone should make an episode where we - the sparrabeth fangirls are led by our PL and we invade the home of Gore in our madness and kidnap him and demand our Sparrabeth ending.....Willo?

AudioHeart
L.O.L

PirateDiva
I need therapy because I'm Crying right now....i just saw a commercial for the AWE DVD....and when the announcer said "Bring home the final adventure of the Biggest Trilogy of the decade" i began to cry! That word Final seems so FINAL!!! sad

Any words of consolation please sad

JCapt Jaeh_K.S
*pats diva on the back*

there is still hope for POTC 4...
there are still fanfictions way better than AWE... (is that a good thing?)
there is still Johnny Depp....

tis alright... don't make me cry too.. erm

Tramps Lady
lol, before the 3rd movie came out in cinemas i'd cry at all the music videos coz i realised the end is coming...i feel ur upsettiness Pirate:P

savvysparrowluv
*bump*

I just remembered this thread, lol - anybody up for a new episode? with all the post-sparrabeth angst floating around right now, it might be helpful wink

texgodiva2s
Miz Imperial PiDiva, not til the fat lady sings, and I am personally not feeling in the least inclined to vocalize--it's just not over. Now, are the big bucks gonna spend more money on film, folks, food, and fun--debateble? but don't matter their doings--there is so much FINE fiction out there from PotCs who adore Capt'n Jack Sparrow and pair him with whomever--if you read one a day for the next 2 years you might maybe have gone through the good ones. Some of the fiction soooooo overrides the pitiful jumble of AWE--which was visually stunning, rich in costumes and ships--I can't believe these folks aren't professional writers. Your story was kick booty, Willo's, KateLoves, Savvy's, Pir8XRo's--I don't know maybe I have stepped way over the this world/that line, don't know, Jack's lodged in my frontal lobe and isn't a second thought, or someone I take up when I'm bored or waiting for the doc--he's just there and all the interesting stories of how he finally comes to Elisabeth's bed or she to his, if or how many children are the fruit of his loins (isn't that the most delightful archaic term), whatever adventures they share in the Caribbean or the world--man, it's what my friend calls a target-rich environment.

In one way, the movies are fine, becos it's a reference point for the world I choose to enjoy now--the fiction, now that's the big taste for me becos quite frankly they(whoever they are) just didn't do it all straight up and down to suit me--and I know that's true for you possibly and a few others. My Capt'n Jack doesn't grow old unless I choose to read that--Elisabeth remains as lucious a peach as she ever might be, Barbossa doesn't fail and I can cheerfully read the end of Beckett in such a litany of vile and evil ways, stuffing him up a chimney if I so desire. I'll twelve step with the best of y'all--but I've given over to my higher power and that's not the movies all said and done. They are lovely, they are provocative, they are easy, only they are just a slice of life--kinda like this forum and all the wonderful,funny, shooting the breeze goofiness or truths we have shared here, well, it can't be just this one post right in the middle of a discussion and that's all it will ever be. Gosh, can't believe I'm saying this, but Pirates is a living document, like the Constitution--it's gonna grow and change as need requires, just like y'all suspect Jack and Elisabeth's changes post AWE. When it ends, for me, when this supreme toy I have tween my ears ceases regulation function. Last breath--then it ends, for me not before. I'm still in love with The Black Stallion I read when I was 7 or 8. Sorry, I am just so in love--this is my happy addiction, don't need all or any of the drugs people take to get happy or balanced or not sad--got pirates--yeah dedicated to my addiction.

Tramps Lady
i mite do an episode later, its 11:20pm...so not right now:P

goodnight:P

Sifzensinril
g'night stick out tongue

tee_pirategirl
I'm waiting fr someone to do an episode. I'll do one after though I promise

Tramps Lady
ahh great, i wrote stuff then my laptop decided to go back a page, and lost what i wrote, lets hope this can b good then lol:P




=======================

Tramps is being shoved into a Mental Institution by Sifzensinril and Savvy

Savvy: Ugh! Tramps! stop squirming!
Sif: Yes....squirming...
Tramps: But i DONT need to be here!
Jaeh: correction... you dont WANT to be here!
Tramps: But i DONT NEED to be here!
PL: its okay sweety, *places hand on shoulder* everyone shows denial at first
Tramps: Dont you sweety me! and get that dirrrrrty willobether hand off me!
All: *gasp*
Tramps: What!? she is!

*the reception lady...who turns out to be texxy...comes to the desk they are waiting at

Tex: Hello, Miz...Tramps, is it? would you prefer going into your room silently, or kicking and screaming?
Mina: Oh, she'll go silently *pulls out fist* Won't you!?
Tramps: *quite calmly* No actually, i prefer to go kicking and screaming, thank you very much.

*guards come and drag her away and put her in a 'crazy' jacket (a.k.a a straight jacket)

Tramps: *rocking back and forth* im not crazy, im not crazy, im not crazy, im not crazy, im not crazy, im not crazy, i swear, im not crazy.

*PL comes in*

PL: Tramps, come with me please...
Tramps: dont you touch me again....*under breath*creepy lady...

*PL opens a door and Tramps walks in and sees all the KMCers in a gymnasium

Tramps: What the----are you all doing here!?
T.Maria: More importantly...why is there a gymnasium in a mental house?
Sailor: Look, tramps, we're all...uhm..worried...
Tramps: About..?

*everyone stares*

Tramps: what? about my obsession?
PL: didnt i tell you to use the term, 'Mental Health Consumer'
Tramps: Yes...but didnt i tell you that i object that statement?
Jaeh: See!!! she is crazy!!! crazy i tell you
Sif: And apparently you are too...
Jaeh: Why!?
Savvy: those guys just stuck a sticker on your back saying 'insane'
Jaeh: *looks in mirror* hey! They did too! i like it!
Tramps: Yeah! i want one! i want one!
'those' guys: okay! *run towards her*
Tramps: Your not taking me that easily! *runs away*

*Savvy, Sif, Mina and T all watch Tramps run*

Savvy: yep, definitely crazy...

============================

i enjoyed writing this

christnabarrett
....Sparrabeth turns into Beckingwill, maybe..
The whole world is actually ended.
And Willeth = s***.
And EthWiIII = even bigger s***.

savvysparrowluv
ROFL, Tramps!!!! THAT WAS AWESOME!!!!

Tramps Lady
lol, thanks. i was bored last night, and i needed something to pass the time:P

texgodiva2s
Miz Tramps, as Savvy sezs, so say I!! You rock. rock

willofthewisp
Sparrabeth group is waiting for today's counselor to come in.

Sif: This is time I could have spent gazing into Jack Sparrow's sparkling eyes! (looks at her watch) What is the hold up?

Tex: No need to get upset. I see cookies and punch in the corner.

Willo: (whines) But that is for AFTER we have our discussion time!

Tramps: (sneaks one) Meh, rules were made to be broken.

(Suddenly, Johnny Depp walks in)

Johnny: Hello, ladies. I'm Dr. Stan Johnson and I'll be your counselor today.

(Everyone gawks at him. He sits)

Johnny: I'd like to begin with some simple word associations. Anyone want to go first?

Tigers: You're, you're Johnny Depp!

Johnny: (condescending but paranoid laugh) No, no, you must have me confused with someone else. My name is Stan Johnson and I'm your counselor.

Kate: No, you're Johnny Depp. Look at the soulful eyes, the rebellious hair...

Johnny: Young lady, Johnny Depp, although a powerhouse, does not have a beard like I do.

Sailor: Could I just please stroke it once?

Johnny: I think that's highly inappropriate...oh the beard. Sure. (Sailor strokes it and coos)

Sailor: I stroked Johnny's beard!

Johnny: Now listen! This is just how sick and twisted you all are! My name is Stan Johnson. I was born in Queens. I went to Princeton University! I'm your freakin' counselor!

Pocky: (grabs his tie) I got his tie!

Savvy: Hey, wait a second (removes beard) It's a fake! It is Johnny.

(We all pounce on him)

Johnny: (regretfully) I just wanted to see what a sparrabether was!!!!!!

savvysparrowluv
GAH! eek! That was awesome Willo!

Heeheehee - I got to remove his beard *mwahahaha*

Tramps Lady
hehehehehehe loved t!!!

i got a free cookie!!!

PirateDiva
LMAO!!! laughing That was great Willo!! lol

VioletEyesPop08
Jack: Elizabeth, do you want some coffee.

Elizabeth: No, that's okay.

Sifzensinril
lol, willo laughing I think we all needed this one stick out tongue

tee_pirategirl
HAHA! ROTFL!!! GOD! That was the best ever. I haven't been satisfied of reading a POTC bit since we did the translations. Now those were gold. You make me smile willo...You should write a Humor piece one day and get it published.

You know u wanna keep writing!!
You've actually inspired me to write...

PL: As all else has failed...I'm going to be hypnotising all of you today.
KMC girls get excited and anxious at the same time.
Tigers: Do you think it's real?
Tee: I dunno.
Jaeh: It might be.
Willo: we gotta send our strongest member forward. Someone who can't be persuaded no matter what.
Everyone takes a step back leaving only Tigers standing/
Tigers: Why me?
Kate: Well you were the one who refused to see AWE a second time remember?? She can't possibly change your mind...go on!
Sifz: TAke one for the team girl.
Tigers: Fine!
She goes into the back room with PL. We hear voices like "look at the ball" and "relax and let it go".
Tigers comes out after a while.
Tee: So? Feel any different.
Tigers: I feel like a whole new person. Girls! Don't u realize how foolish we've been. Sparrabeth never existed...Elizabeth loved Will from the second she saw him. *laughs * We've been stupid for TWO YEARS!!!
Jaeh: AAAAA! Lord have mercy on us. They've got her. They've got her.
KMC girls cower in the corner holding up their garlic, rum and JE pictures.
Tigers: But don't you understand? It's just a movie...Doesn't matter. Not really! And even if it did... Will and Elizabeth got married for god's sake. End of story...Johnny Depp is cool and everything but whatever...I've met hotter men.
Kate: EEEEEEEE!! Stop her. Make her stop.
Everyone starts panicking.
Willo: We're next! They'll take us all. I'm gonna run for it.
Jaeh: What's the point! You'll be the last Sparrabther left.
Willo: Willofthewisp!! The last Sparrabether...has a lovely ring to it.
Kate: Now's not the time to be quoting Captain Jack Sparrow...it's time to be acting like him.
Sifz: Run!!
Tigers: *laughs* calm down you guys. I was joking. I feel exactly the same. I knocked PL out and tied her to her chair...
Everyone sighs in relief.
Tigers: Now who wants to play a nice ol' game of "Stalking Johnny"?
Everyone: MEEEEEE!!!

willofthewisp
LMAO! laughing laughing laughing Giving me a Jack line! I loved it! I'm so glad Tigers wasn't turned. It was starting to turn into the Stepford fans!

katelovespirate
hahaha oh gee--- these are great. smile

Tramps Lady
lmao, soooo saw that coming! t was fantastic!!!

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