So I'm Gonna Be a Dad (**Panic Mode**)

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Patient_Leech
Yeah, so I found out about 8 or 10 weeks ago that my wife is pregnant with our first child. We're excited... got our first ultrasound tomorrow afternoon actually. She's about 11 weeks now.

WHAT DO i DO??? sick laughing

But seriously, any advice for a first-time dad?

Jmanghan
Congratulations dude!!

Unoriginal
Don't sweat the small stuff.

riv6672
Advice?
Pick a cool name, dont spare the rod, teach him/her the little things (dancing, basic car care, self defense, cooking. Things like that.), and enjoy the adoration before the teen years hit.

Patient_Leech
Originally posted by Jmanghan
Congratulations dude!!
Thanks!

Originally posted by riv6672
Advice?
Pick a cool name, dont spare the rod, teach him/her the little things (dancing, basic car care, self defense, cooking. Things like that.), and enjoy the adoration before the teen years hit.
Thanks, sounds about right. This summer I saw my cousin going through the teenage years with her kids and it looks horrible. sad

riv6672
Oh it IS.
At least i had all boys, i'm pretty sure girls are a million times worse!

Patient_Leech
Yeah, I'm crossing my fingers for a boy.. or twins, so we don't have to go through this again. One and done!

riv6672
Twins would be AWEsome!!! eek!

AKA, you'll have a great time; parenthood is pretty damn cool.

Patient_Leech
Originally posted by riv6672
Twins would be AWEsome!!! eek!

AKA, you'll have a great time; parenthood is pretty damn cool.

thumb up smile

Surtur
Originally posted by riv6672
AKA, you'll have a great time; parenthood is pretty damn cool.

If you were Pinnochio I'm guessing your nose would be around 80 miles long at this moment.


Err I mean, congratulations! There is the small chance your child could grow up to be a child star and then you can spend all their money before they turn 18. There are laws to prevent this, but a clever man could circumvent them.

riv6672
^^^If you were an adult i'd care about your opinion.

Again, all the best, PL; not looking to Surtur up your thread, so i'll leave you to it for a bit.

Esau Cairn
Originally posted by Patient_Leech

But seriously, any advice for a first-time dad?


Congrats!

Don't bother with parenting books, they're a load of crock.

Get used to no sleeping.

Don't joke or freak out about lactating breasts unless you enjoy sleeping on the couch!

The rest will come easy...you'll be surprised just how quickly your fatherly instincts kick in.

Patient_Leech
Originally posted by Esau Cairn
Congrats!

Don't bother with parenting books, they're a load of crock.
Thanks. Yeah, my wife got me a book when she told me the news. It's not so much about parenting, but information about the pregnancy process and what to expect when and doctor visits, etc.. Basically the writer just tries to be amusing the whole time, in most cases unsuccessfully. It's mostly useless.

Originally posted by Esau Cairn
Don't joke or freak out about lactating breasts unless you enjoy sleeping on the couch!

laughing

Robtard
Congrats, Leech

You probably don't want twins, you'll be getting very little sleep with one child over the next 12-18 months, you don't want to make that less.

It's a bit overwhelming at first, being responsible for another person that is completely reliant on. I didn't read any parenting books and I never cared for a child prior to my first being born, but all it fell into place rather well, almost natural.

I changed the first diaper on both my children so my wife could take a long needed sleep after delivery, be prepared for that first one if you do it, it's not like the rest that follow (ie regular baby doodoo), it's a tar-like substance that seems more akin to something that would come out of the ninth layer of hell instead of a baby's bottom.

Patient_Leech
Originally posted by Robtard
I changed the first diaper on both my children so my wife could take a long needed sleep after delivery, be prepared for that first one if you do it, it's not like the rest that follow (ie regular baby doodoo), it's a tar-like substance that seems more akin to something that would come out of the ninth layer of hell instead of a baby's bottom.

Oh, jesus. Thanks for the heads up. sick

Cherrywild
Find your groove and stick with it. I don't know two parents with the exact same style.

Learn to let "Helpful" advice roll off your shoulders. You're going to be hearing tons of it.

Nurture your marriage. You will, more than ever, need to identify as partners other than 'mom and dad'.

Patient_Leech
Here, we just announced on Social Media (although most of our friends and family already knew). You'll get to meet me, my cat, my wife, and the inside of my wife's uterus, haha...

Wz43FdmMvBw&feature=youtu.be

(I like to fancy myself a wannabe independent filmmaker, heh)

Dave_97
Being a dad stinks. Be a mom

Flyattractor
When naming your child always play the Rhyming Game. It can save the child some grief over the years.

And remember. If you have a boy. You only have to worry about one little penis. If you have a girl. You have to worry about ALL the little penises.

riv6672
Originally posted by Robtard
Congrats, Leech

You probably don't want twins, you'll be getting very little sleep with one child over the next 12-18 months, you don't want to make that less.

It's a bit overwhelming at first, being responsible for another person that is completely reliant on. I didn't read any parenting books and I never cared for a child prior to my first being born, but all it fell into place rather well, almost natural.

I changed the first diaper on both my children so my wife could take a long needed sleep after delivery, be prepared for that first one if you do it, it's not like the rest that follow (ie regular baby doodoo), it's a tar-like substance that seems more akin to something that would come out of the ninth layer of hell instead of a baby's bottom.
I only got to do that with my youngest i was deployed the other 2 times. Darn it. shifty

Patient_Leech
Originally posted by Flyattractor
And remember. If you have a boy. You only have to worry about one little penis. If you have a girl. You have to worry about ALL the little penises.

That's the main reason I want a boy! laughing out loud

But in all seriousness, I really don't care too much which gender. As long as the baby is healthy... and has our charming good-looks, of course. cool

riv6672
They say kids initially look like their fathers as an evolutionary defense, to keep the fathers from killing said kids out the gate...! eek!

Patient_Leech
So we got the ultrasound yesterday to find out the gender. They put the secret in an envelope for us and we're going to have a party this weekend to find out...

I tried to tell from the ultrasound a little bit, and it was probably my imagination, but I think I saw a little teeny wiener in there. But we really couldn't tell.

We really have no idea. Saturday should be fun. smile

Surtur
Woah bro why you gotta do that, what if he see's this someday and sees you calling his wiener tiny.

Patient_Leech
They all start OUT tiny! laughing out loud

Darth Truculent
Congrats my friend. Life is going to change big time for the best. As soon as that child is born into this world, all priorities are changed. Protect his or her innocence and guide them in this life. Unfortunately for me, I didn't find out I have (hence the word have) a 2 year old daughter until an old FWB who just told me. As soon as I saw her with my dark blue eyes, light red hair and a strong German jaw line everything changed. I just wished I was in her life.

Anyway here is a present from me to you:
Kate Voegele performing "Hallejah"
https://youtu.be/sDJgxE-0PZI

Patient_Leech
Originally posted by Darth Truculent
Congrats my friend. Life is going to change big time for the best. As soon as that child is born into this world, all priorities are changed. Protect his or her innocence and guide them in this life.

Thanks a bunch, man. Good luck with your daughter, too. smile

TethAdamTheRock
Originally posted by Patient_Leech
Yeah, so I found out about 8 or 10 weeks ago that my wife is pregnant with our first child. We're excited... got our first ultrasound tomorrow afternoon actually. She's about 11 weeks now.

WHAT DO i DO??? sick laughing

But seriously, any advice for a first-time dad? Make peace with your wife before he is born.

Organize responsibility (who does what and who does what)

Trust me or its all hell from there.

Maybe go to a church?

riv6672
Originally posted by Patient_Leech
So we got the ultrasound yesterday to find out the gender. They put the secret in an envelope for us and we're going to have a party this weekend to find out...

I tried to tell from the ultrasound a little bit, and it was probably my imagination, but I think I saw a little teeny wiener in there. But we really couldn't tell.

We really have no idea. Saturday should be fun. smile
Thats neat. Hope you have fun!

My last kid i found out via VHS tape made by the hospital and sent to me in Iraq. I was pleasantly surprised, 3 out of 3 boys. thumb up

Patient_Leech
Originally posted by TethAdamTheRock
Make peace with your wife before he is born.

Organize responsibility (who does what and who does what)

Trust me or its all hell from there.

Maybe go to a church?

Oh, well, I really don't know what to expect or how to plan. My wife and I are both fairly chill.... we don't yell at each other or even argue much. I think we'll probably be able to manage playing it by ear. So we'll see.

Oh, and church. No, I don't really do church. I have a pretty severe aversion to it. I went to Christian high school. sick

And any child of mine is not going to be indoctrinated by me to believe in Santa Clause-For-Adults or the easter bunny or any of that bullshit. It's not good for the mind.

riv6672
heh heh

Darth Truculent
Thanks Patient . . . we both have entered a brave new world.

riv6672
Of pain.

jaden101
http://az616578.vo.msecnd.net/files/2016/03/04/635926634546086585-1877209801_shutterstock_107685965-615px.jpg

Flyattractor
Originally posted by jaden101
http://az616578.vo.msecnd.net/files/2016/03/04/635926634546086585-1877209801_shutterstock_107685965-615px.jpg

Jaden's mom forked up and used a plastic hanger by mistake...

jaden101
Fly's obsession with me showing itself again. Not surprising.

Flyattractor
At least its a SOFT obsession.

jaden101
You can get pills to help with that.

riv6672
Wow, you're a real piece of shit.

I say that as a casual observer.

Flyattractor
Originally posted by jaden101
You can get pills to help with that.

Nah I will just wait for the rigmortis to set in.

jaden101
Originally posted by riv6672
Wow, you're a real piece of shit.

I say that as a casual observer.

👍 Aye nae bor pal.

Patient_Leech
We revealed the gender last night to our friends... and to ourselves! big grin

VsX4KG1pw0A&feature=youtu.be

Darth Truculent
Still on the learning curve here Patient. Slowly getting used to watching cartoons and Disney nonstop. Her mom is very generous when I want to visit her. Still getting to know her, but no longer shy around me. Gonna take her up to the snow later this week. I'm from California and it has snowed a shiteload for the past 2 weeks because of the storms.

*By the way, I will never write or say her name.

walshy
Originally posted by Patient_Leech
We revealed the gender last night to our friends... and to ourselves! big grin

VsX4KG1pw0A&feature=youtu.be that was cute Originally posted by Darth Truculent
Still on the learning curve here Patient. Slowly getting used to watching cartoons and Disney nonstop. Her mom is very generous when I want to visit her. Still getting to know her, but no longer shy around me. Gonna take her up to the snow later this week. I'm from California and it has snowed a shiteload for the past 2 weeks because of the storms.

*By the way, I will never write or say her name. why not? is her name something really rubbish like bananahammock?

riv6672
Originally posted by jaden101
👍 Aye nae bor pal.
I dont speak piece of shit internet trash.

Enjoy your coat hanger.

Patient_Leech
Originally posted by walshy
that was cute

Thanks. It was actually really fun. More people should do it... good excuse for a party!

Originally posted by walshy
why not? is her name something really rubbish like bananahammock?

Haha... speaking of names, our girl names matched up quite well, but I think we are going to have a hard time picking a boy name. My favorite is Maximilian or Maxim (and of course 'Max' for short). I think my wife likes Max, but not Maximilian or Maxim. I don't know why. To me Max is a lot cooler if it's short for something. But anyway, I want something less common and cool sounding.

jaden101
Originally posted by riv6672

Enjoy your coat hanger.

Its not me you should be saying that to.

Flyattractor
Jaden can be such a Cute Little Auschwitz Nazi...

Darth Truculent
To answer your question walshy, we both (her mother) and I want a certain degree of privacy until the right time. So I'm respecting our decision. Very few know her name - save close family members and extremely close friends. It's difficult because I want to openly walk out and say "hey, I would like you to meet my daughter _______" - it really really sucks. I hate the fact that some people are against bi-racial kids. Bastards.

jaden101
Originally posted by Flyattractor
Jaden can be such a Cute Little Auschwitz Nazi...

There's you and your fantasies about me again. Best you internalise those thoughts.

Patient_Leech
So I only have a couple more days before the little one comes out...

Flyattractor
And enjoy your last few night of full sleep.

NewLanceWindu
Originally posted by Patient_Leech
So I only have a couple more days before the little one comes out... Originally posted by Flyattractor
And enjoy your last few night of full sleep.

Seriously, it takes years before you get a full nights sleep on the regular again.

My youngest is nearing 2 and she still wakes up around two in the morning every day.

Flyattractor
Originally posted by NewLanceWindu
Seriously, it takes years before you get a full nights sleep on the regular again.

My youngest is nearing 2 and she still wakes up around two in the morning every day.

Yeah, that is why my parents put a lock on their bedroom door.

NewLanceWindu
She doesn't even get out of bed, just starts crying at the top of her lungs until one of us does something to calm her down.

Flyattractor
Ear Plugs man....All I am saying.

NewLanceWindu
Then she would wake up older brother who would come to our door.

Flyattractor
Hence putting in that door lock I was talking about.

Patient_Leech
Originally posted by NewLanceWindu
She doesn't even get out of bed, just starts crying at the top of her lungs until one of us does something to calm her down.

Nightmares?

NewLanceWindu
Originally posted by Patient_Leech
Nightmares?

Probably. It happens to all kids at one point or another.

Patient_Leech
Originally posted by NewLanceWindu
Probably. It happens to all kids at one point or another.

Aww.. poor thing. sad

Flyattractor
Its called Parent Training. She is letting you know who is on whose leash!

Patient_Leech
Heading to the hospital shortly for the c-section. cool

NewLanceWindu
Good luck.

Patient_Leech
Son born today at 12:51 pm here in Southeastern United States to me (an American) and my wife (Brazilian).

Weight: 6 lb 14 oz (same weight that I was! What a coincidence!)

He's beautiful and healthy so far. smile

(I can't successfully post a picture right now from my phone, but will at some point)

Patient_Leech
Trying to post some pictures of the little guy...

Patient_Leech
Just too much cuteness...

Patient_Leech
Baby burrito... delicious...

Patient_Leech
Meet Theo. He's the most beautiful little mammal I've ever seen...

NewLanceWindu
What a cutie.

Patient_Leech
Thanks. Yeah, we're pretty enamored... inlove

socool8520
Originally posted by Patient_Leech
Yeah, so I found out about 8 or 10 weeks ago that my wife is pregnant with our first child. We're excited... got our first ultrasound tomorrow afternoon actually. She's about 11 weeks now.

WHAT DO i DO??? sick laughing

But seriously, any advice for a first-time dad?

Congrats man. Have 4 myself. Only advice is to have patience. You're going to need it. lol

Patient_Leech
Originally posted by socool8520
Congrats man. Have 4 myself. Only advice is to have patience. You're going to need it. lol

Thanks. Yeah, I'm seeing that.. last night I was changing his diaper and he did his usual pee all over the place and then as soon as I switched out the dirty diaper with the clean one (I hadn't even closed the diaper yet) he pooped all over it. I just had to pause a while and laugh.. laughing out loud

Still waiting for his circumcision to heal so have to put petroleum jelly on the tip and still cleaning his belly button with alcohol until the umbilical cord falls off. So diaper changing is overly complicated right now.. laughing out loud

Working on a little video of the birth, so I'll post it when it's done...

Robtard
Congrats, PL. Welcome to fatherhood.

Patient_Leech
Thanks, Rob.

Here is the little video I put together for the occasion. My welcoming him to the world...

fhbTOvKB5CA

John Murdoch
Originally posted by Robtard
Congrats, Leech

You probably don't want twins, you'll be getting very little sleep with one child over the next 12-18 months, you don't want to make that less.

It's a bit overwhelming at first, being responsible for another person that is completely reliant on. I didn't read any parenting books and I never cared for a child prior to my first being born, but all it fell into place rather well, almost natural.

I changed the first diaper on both my children so my wife could take a long needed sleep after delivery, be prepared for that first one if you do it, it's not like the rest that follow (ie regular baby doodoo), it's a tar-like substance that seems more akin to something that would come out of the ninth layer of hell instead of a baby's bottom.

Agreed to all this, especially be aware of the black tar 1st-time poop, and a big congrats to you and Mrs. Leech, Leech.

You're going to want to flip out due to the lack of sleep: don't flip out on your wife (from personal experience, ya big-time d-bag move I know), flip out on the weights, the lap pool, a tire with a sledgehammer, anything but people --- especially your wife.

I'll add another if someone has not already: take plenty of time off from work if you have the leave/can afford it. With my first, I took off a week and was a zombie. With my second, I took off three weeks. Helped my wife and daughter and myself adjust to number two and was much much better overall.

EDIT: Didn't check the whole thread.

Congratulations on the little fella, Leech! Being a father is one of the greatest gifts a man can receive. Thankful you, your wife, and baby boy are doing great!

John Murdoch
Originally posted by Patient_Leech
Meet Theo. He's the most beautiful little mammal I've ever seen...

What is Guy Pearce doing holding your son?! Haha, JK. He is cute little fella, man.

Also on the circumcision: my baby boy will be 4 months on June 18th. After that was healed, much easier with the diapers. Still pees everywhere, but much easier without the PJ and gauzes.

Patient_Leech
Originally posted by John Murdoch
Congratulations on the little fella, Leech! Being a father is one of the greatest gifts a man can receive. Thankful you, your wife, and baby boy are doing great!

Thanks a bunch! It's actually really awesome, so far. Of course we're only like 2 weeks in... haha, and we had a lot of help from my wife's parents, who leave tomorrow. I think we'll be alright, though. My parents live in town and my dad is a pediatrician, which is super nice.

Originally posted by John Murdoch
What is Guy Pearce doing holding your son?! Haha, JK. He is cute little fella, man.

Haha, I'll take that as a compliment. Guy Pearce is awesome.

Originally posted by John Murdoch
Also on the circumcision: my baby boy will be 4 months on June 18th. After that was healed, much easier with the diapers. Still pees everywhere, but much easier without the PJ and gauzes.

Oh yeah, we just got to discontinue to PJ and it's awesome. He healed up very quickly and it looks great. When my oldest nephew had his done 10 years or so ago it looked awful, it almost made me cry.. heh. My son's looks awesome already, completely normal. Just waiting for the umbilical cord to fall off.

A more recent picture...

John Murdoch
^Man, he a handsome little guy. Glad he's healed up, and yes Guy Pearce is a G.

My son had an umbilical hernia where the abdominal wall beneath the belly button doesn't close all the way after his cord fell off, but it just healed up over the past week. If it happens, no cause for alarm. Also, VERY helpful to have a pediatrician for a dad haha.

Patient_Leech
Originally posted by John Murdoch
My son had an umbilical hernia where the abdominal wall beneath the belly button doesn't close all the way after his cord fell off, but it just healed up over the past week. If it happens, no cause for alarm.

Glad that healed up. That doesn't sound fun.

The in-laws are leaving tomorrow morning, so we'll be on our own! Aaaahhh!!!

I'm taking the rest of the week off from work, though. Should be fun. big grin

Patient_Leech
Happy Father's Day everyone.

I had a good one. Hope all the other fathers around here did too. smile

Patient_Leech
We have been blessed with the most amazing little boy. He's 4 months old now. big grin

.

Patient_Leech
And a more recent picture... love

.

riv6672
So tiny...fear

SamZED
Congrats, man! Good for you.

Raisen
Dang. I was going to say don't sign the birth certificate and just ghost the whole situation. too late tho

Patient_Leech
Originally posted by SamZED
Congrats, man! Good for you.

Thanks. smile

He just keeps getting more and more adorable. He's doing of a lot of smiling and giggling now. Here's another picture from a month or so ago, me in the pool with him for the first time...

.

Nuke Nixon
Kids cost millions of dollars, I can't imagine wanting anything that costs that much.

socool8520
^ That's cuz you're not a baller bro. lol

Nuke Nixon
No, I'm happy and can sleep long time, watch whatever I want on telly, and go wherever whenever and can keep my expensive collectibles at knee height without fear. Boom!

riv6672
Originally posted by Patient_Leech
Thanks. smile

He just keeps getting more and more adorable. He's doing of a lot of smiling and giggling now. Here's another picture from a month or so ago, me in the pool with him for the first time...

.
First times are great.

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