Gender: Male Location: Welfare Kingdom of California
I agree Cyclops sometimes life is unfair! Many times it does come crashing down too hard on a person. But you see when you're doing something to help others is good. When you try to make others happy is one of the many beauties of life. Because you are not doing it for yourself, you are doing it for others.
Is not about failing is about doing something for someone. That is how friendship becomes solidified when you help others. Trying to help a love one or stranger is what makes life worth living. Is kinda like saying "I live to help others live".
You have no idea how much I have been trying to make the best of things, but I am at the bottom of the barrel as it were. The end of my rope (not actually... I am not suicidal)
Apathy is the single most important sign of suicidal thoughts. This thread that you made is evidence that you're not suicidal, since you obviously care
Well... I just wanted to know that I am not alone in my thoughts of how you go through life trying to make all of those around you as happy as they can be, and then when you need help the most, you are being selfish
Gender: Male Location: Welfare Kingdom of California
Sometimes you have to do small sacrificies to help others. I know sometimes a friends ask me for money. If he is in a real Jam I'll help him in any way I can. Sometimes I get short by lending money to a friend. Do I expect him to pay me back? Yeah! But I never refuse help to anyone. Hang tough! Whatever comes your way face it! Don't turn your back on problems! Suck it up and be tough!
I couldn't agree with you more Cyke. It's as though there could be something around the corner that would make everything better, so you run to it. And it just crushes you like a bug. Just pushing you down a little more then before. It seems like it's been happening to me for the past couple months. But I bottle it up. And i dont let my friends know that i'm sad or mad. But thats just how i work, i dotn want people to worry about me. I just want to make my friends that are mad or what ever happy and take their pain off of them and i would rath have it put on me then them. And I have been having the worst week, and it seems like it gets worst and worst. And last wednesday was so bad that i just laughed at myself. It was.... well it sucked ass. Trust me, you are far from being the only one.
As of late, I have had a guy at work riding my ass (not literally.) about a whole bunch of shit, relationship (or lack thereof) problems, my best friends think I am a freeloading dickhole, and the list goes on and on.
Gender: Female Location: ~ you wouldn't wanna be here~
I am with you cyclops, i mean, i have always tried to please everyone around me, and it don't work, i always screw up and someone gets mad at me for something or another,and i can't even keep my b/f happy, so i loose him,and i mean, my barrel is dry and i don't want to be in the barrell anymore, i hate life,and it obviously hates me right back
__________________
my soul cries for deliverance
will i be denied
Christ
tourniquet
my suicide
Gender: Female Location: The dark depths of my withering sou
As of right now I think I'm pretty ok with life, but a couple of weeks ago I was so burnt out from all this shit going on in my life and just didn't feel like doing ANYTHING at all.
I know exactly how you feel. But you have to realize that life is a cycle of ups and downs, and sometimes you'll feel good about yourself, sometimes you won't. There's this kid who goes to my school who I used to try to be nice to way back when we were wee little tykes in grade school, and he never did like me for some reason... Still doesn't. Just know that other people have the same problem as you do.
Gender: Female Location: lazing around and drinking lemonade
Yeah... sometimes life sucks. In fact, most of the time life sucks. That's why people cut their wrists. Well, that, and they're masochistic or something... but my point is that it DOES suck, and you're not alone... it just feels that way when you're in pain. And yes, I do speak from experience. I would be a wrist-slashing goth myself if it wasn't for the fact that you can't wallflower in a world of bright colors by wearing black. And I don't like pain. I mean, pain hurts, dammit....
But, anyway... I live for myself anymore. I've stopped doing things for people unless I just feel like it, and I don't do nice things voluntarily. I don't really want everyone to die horrible, bloody deaths - *I'M* not cleaning that up - but I would prefer it if people would leave me to my own devices and just leave me the hell alone. (They don't, of course... which is where pain comes from.)
All I can really say is: live for the moments. A nice, warm summer day; a good song to listen to; little things that make you feel good-- live for those. Live *in* the moments, and, for a little while, at least, pain will be nothing but a nightmare.
I have been where you are. I was depressed for a decade. I was so depressed last year, my final year of college, that I almost didn't graduate. However, things do get better. It takes a while, sometimes years, before it seems like it, but it will get better. Figure out what it is you really want to do with your life and then work towards that goal. Life may suck on the way there, but once you reach it, you will feel great. All I ever wanted to do was live in another country. It took twelve years to get here, but I finally made it. I am the happiest I have ever been now that I'm living in China. I plan on staying here a long time. It really is more fun than the States.
And if your friends are being a$$es towards you maybe you should try to find some new friends that will treat you better. Most of my Stateside friends sucked, but I've made a lot a new friends here who are relly nice and good to me.
Life doesn't suck
It's just the way you percieve things that make it suck... I'm a very optimistic person, and I strongly believe people are VERY ungreatful. You only understand how lucky you are when your life gets even worse... Just admire the things that you have, i.e. people that love you, health, economics... dunno what else
Be happy!
__________________
shallow me, then spit me out
for hating you I blame myself
seeing you it kills me now
no, I don't cry on the outside anymore...
KMC Community Forums
Mar 31st, 2004 12:43 AM
