I've just recently started to create some of my own lyrics and I just wanted some opinions on one of them in particular, here it is.
What you niggaz want coz I got it rite here,
ya niggaz strut, then a hit ya rite there,
Not really impressed by wat ya'll niggaz wear,
ya'll talk shit but I really don't care,
I'm the type of nigga that'l die for the cause,
fuk wat u heard ima die for my dawgs,
Ain't scared o shit coz I rise and a fall,
fuker drag on coz his fists in the flames,
drag on mutha fuka don't forget the name,
coz we all takin over ain't shit the same,
if you scared ma nigga u better quit the game.
and aint no other cats got love for me,
aint no black cats go'ne bust for me,
aint no cats go'ne shed love for me,
but ma thug is go'ne be a thug wit me.
I'm new to this so its nothing great, be honest and tell me if u think its any good.
Ok apparently its not to good, mainly because of my constant use of nigga or watever. So how about this one.
If im gonna rap, ima rap all night,
if im lookin for sumthin its probably a fight,
If im gonna fuk bitches then theyd better be tight.
If i gota play, ima play till a win,
since i gotta be here to win, to begin,
stay with the raps coz the raps is the real,
wanna fuk then we fuk, already know the deal,
fuk wat u look like just show me the real,
till i keep a spot we can go to chill.
whoa whoa whoa man, you need to adjust those lyrics COMPLETELY, they need to have meaning in them, put some lyricisim in there man. use punchlines too, those are perfect in rap sogs.
I'm no lyricist but before you even begin to think about trying to write lyrics with meaning you need to adjuct your rhyme shemes and syllables.. you're approaching it like it's a dr seus book.
Then you write you should be writing about something. Your rhymes aren't really about anything--pick a person,place, thing or event to rap about and just having a subject will make your rhymes so much better--what youre doing is what all rappers do ---be better than them--but keep it up, that shit aint easy -
That sucked!!! I hate when people make raps up online. Go to BET freestyle friday and lets see if people will give you respect for it. They probably wont.
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The more you question it, the less you will understand.
damn... to tell you the truth, your lyrics could use some work
your lyrics have to have a meaning to you and know one else
A rap is nothing but your own poem. Try free stylin about any thing or just wrighting poems and c what u get
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So guys are the most confusing thing ever on earth
KMC Community Forums
Hip Hop heads
Dec 2nd, 2005 02:20 PM
you need alot of adjusting.
