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diegocala
Replicant
Gender: Male Location: Tempe, AZ United States |
Warning Labels
Due to increasing products liability litigation, American liquor
manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following
warning labels be placed immediately on all varieties of alcohol
containers:
_____
WARNING
The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell
happened to your bra and panties.
_____
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when
you are not.
_________
WARNING
The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.
_________
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and
over again that you love them.
_____
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.
__________
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are
really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.
__________
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically
converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.
_____
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug
burns on the forehead, knees and lower back.
________
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are
tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.
_____
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing
WITH you.
_____
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.
_____
WARNING:
The crumsumpten of alcahol may Mack you tink you can tipe real gode
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--Siggie Created by Master Godshinto
Whatever happened to my Rock N Roll?
Come in, she said, I'll give you shelter from the storm
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Aug 24th, 2003 11:56 PM |
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ObieTrice 26
no nacho for you!
Gender: Male Location: In Da Hood |
that reminds me, heres an actjual sign in a parking lot that had a slight typo and this is what it said:"please do not stand or shit down in the middle of the lot" its supposed to be "sit down"
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"Sometimes you feel tired,feel weak,when you feel weak,you feel like you wanna just give up.But you gotta search it within you ,find that inner strength and just pull that s**t out of you and get that motivation to not give up and not be a quiter no matter how bad you wanna just fall flat on your face" -Eminem
"This rap game,this rap game,i aint selling my soul for this rap game,i aint digging no hole for this rap game and i'm telling you no,it aint happening"-50 Cent
"about to lose it all in a pool of alcohal,if my funeral's tomorrow,I wonder would they even call,When the music stops"-Kon Artis of D12
R.I.P Tupac
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Aug 24th, 2003 11:59 PM |
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silver_tears
Senior Member
Gender: Unspecified Location: |
heres one on a hair dryer "do not use while in water"
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Aug 25th, 2003 12:11 AM |
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Koala MeatPie
Tonk's Husband
Gender: Male Location: Cute And Fluffy In My Tummy |
On christmas Lighs: For Indoor Or outdorr use ONLY
As opposed to???
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Aug 25th, 2003 03:53 AM |
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jinXed by JaNx
Senior Member
Gender: Male Location: Pittsburgh |
no you know when you rent a video game from blockbuster, if you look on the back theres a warning saying "theres a chance youll get a seizure, and that you should take a 10-15 minute break every hour, they tell you do this because playing video games for a couple hours can make your muscles, skin and joints hurt they say you should take a break even if you dont feel you need it, and if your hands or wrists hurt they actually tell you to stop playing, and theres about 2 more paragraphs of this crap its great, next time you rent a game look
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"If you tell the truth, you never have to remember anything" -Twain
(sig by Scythe)
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Aug 25th, 2003 06:05 AM |
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jinXed by JaNx
Senior Member
Gender: Male Location: Pittsburgh |
its not a warning but its one of the best labels, on 2 liter bottles of soda theres always a label saying NO REFILL, which means someone had to try to go back to the store to get a refill
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"If you tell the truth, you never have to remember anything" -Twain
(sig by Scythe)
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Aug 25th, 2003 06:07 AM |
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LindsIsSexyK
ALL GROWN UP NOW =)
Gender: Female Location: WASHINGTON STATE |
Here is another warning that you can find on a hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping
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Aug 25th, 2003 06:12 AM |
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jinXed by JaNx
Senior Member
Gender: Male Location: Pittsburgh |
yeah ive tried that one a couple of times but i cant seem to pull it off
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"If you tell the truth, you never have to remember anything" -Twain
(sig by Scythe)
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Aug 25th, 2003 06:13 AM |
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LindsIsSexyK
ALL GROWN UP NOW =)
Gender: Female Location: WASHINGTON STATE |
Here's some more~
On Boot's Children Cough medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication" (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year olds with head-colds off those forklifts)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: may cause drowsiness." (and I'm taking this because??????)
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (Now somebody out there, help me on this, I'm a bit confused)
On Sunsbury's Peanuts: "Warning contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)
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Aug 25th, 2003 06:20 AM |
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LindsIsSexyK
ALL GROWN UP NOW =)
Gender: Female Location: WASHINGTON STATE |
Here is a few more~
On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (Idon't blame the company, I blame the parents on this one)
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap" (and that would be how?????)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chains with your hands or genitals" (......was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
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Aug 25th, 2003 06:27 AM |
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jinXed by JaNx
Senior Member
Gender: Male Location: Pittsburgh |
about that chainsaw one, let me tell you that doesnt work. thats why i have to squat when i pee now
__________________
"If you tell the truth, you never have to remember anything" -Twain
(sig by Scythe)
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Aug 25th, 2003 06:37 AM |
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LindsIsSexyK
ALL GROWN UP NOW =)
Gender: Female Location: WASHINGTON STATE |
Well let me tell you, I could have lived my whole life being perfectly fine without hearing that lol j/k
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Aug 25th, 2003 06:38 AM |
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jinXed by JaNx
Senior Member
Gender: Male Location: Pittsburgh |
its my job to warn and inform
__________________
"If you tell the truth, you never have to remember anything" -Twain
(sig by Scythe)
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Aug 25th, 2003 06:41 AM |
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LindsIsSexyK
ALL GROWN UP NOW =)
Gender: Female Location: WASHINGTON STATE |
Somebody else needs to post so cool stuff in here
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Aug 25th, 2003 06:43 AM |
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jinXed by JaNx
Senior Member
Gender: Male Location: Pittsburgh |
on a can of axe deoderant it says "do not spray in eyes"
"Do not drive with sunshield in place." -- On a cardboard sunshield that keeps the sun off the dashboard.
__________________
"If you tell the truth, you never have to remember anything" -Twain
(sig by Scythe)
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Aug 25th, 2003 06:55 AM |
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LindsIsSexyK
ALL GROWN UP NOW =)
Gender: Female Location: WASHINGTON STATE |
blah blah blah blah blah blah
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Aug 25th, 2003 06:58 AM |
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jinXed by JaNx
Senior Member
Gender: Male Location: Pittsburgh |
what?
__________________
"If you tell the truth, you never have to remember anything" -Twain
(sig by Scythe)
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Aug 25th, 2003 07:02 AM |
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LindsIsSexyK
ALL GROWN UP NOW =)
Gender: Female Location: WASHINGTON STATE |
nothing I'm just bored is all
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Aug 25th, 2003 07:03 AM |
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jinXed by JaNx
Senior Member
Gender: Male Location: Pittsburgh |
wells thats no reason to speak gibberish is it?
__________________
"If you tell the truth, you never have to remember anything" -Twain
(sig by Scythe)
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Aug 25th, 2003 07:11 AM |
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LindsIsSexyK
ALL GROWN UP NOW =)
Gender: Female Location: WASHINGTON STATE |
ghslfjfklshjsfklhjkldfh
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Aug 25th, 2003 07:21 AM |
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