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Alternative Nursery Rhymes
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Phoenix
Luna Lovegood

Gender: Female
Location: in a double decker bus...

Alternative Nursery Rhymes

BE WARNED - These are RUDE!!!


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Old Post Aug 18th, 2003 05:58 PM
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Phoenix
Luna Lovegood

Gender: Female
Location: in a double decker bus...

Alternative Nursery Rhymes


Mary had a little skirt with splits right up the sides
and every time that Mary walked the boys could see her Thighs

Mary had another skirt twas split right up the front ...

but she didn't wear that one very often


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Last edited by Phoenix on Aug 18th, 2003 at 06:02 PM

Old Post Aug 18th, 2003 05:58 PM
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Phoenix
Luna Lovegood

Gender: Female
Location: in a double decker bus...

Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet, her clothes all tattered and
torn.
It wasn't the spider that crept beside her,
But Little Boy Blue and his horn.


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Old Post Aug 18th, 2003 05:58 PM
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Phoenix
Luna Lovegood

Gender: Female
Location: in a double decker bus...

Simple Simon met a Pieman, going to the fair.
Said Simple Simon to the Pieman,
What have you got there?
Said the Pieman unto Simon,
Pies, you d*ckhead.


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Old Post Aug 18th, 2003 05:59 PM
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Phoenix
Luna Lovegood

Gender: Female
Location: in a double decker bus...

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the kings horses and all the kings men,
said "F*ck him, He's only an egg.


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Old Post Aug 18th, 2003 05:59 PM
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Phoenix
Luna Lovegood

Gender: Female
Location: in a double decker bus...

Mary had a little lamb
It ran into a pylon.
10,000 volts went up it's ass
and turned it's wool to nylon


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Last edited by Phoenix on Aug 18th, 2003 at 06:03 PM

Old Post Aug 18th, 2003 06:00 PM
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Phoenix
Luna Lovegood

Gender: Female
Location: in a double decker bus...

Georgie Porgy pudding and pie.
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
When the boys came out to play,
He kissed them too, cause he was gay.


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Old Post Aug 18th, 2003 06:00 PM
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Phoenix
Luna Lovegood

Gender: Female
Location: in a double decker bus...

Jack and Jill went up the hill
To have some hankypanky.
Silly Jill forgot her pill,
And now there's little Frankie


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Old Post Aug 18th, 2003 06:01 PM
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Phoenix
Luna Lovegood

Gender: Female
Location: in a double decker bus...

Old Mother Hubbard Went to the cupboard
to fetch her poor dog a bone.
When she bent over Rover took over,
And gave her a bone of his own.


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Old Post Aug 18th, 2003 06:01 PM
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Phoenix
Luna Lovegood

Gender: Female
Location: in a double decker bus...

Little Boy Blew.
Hey. He needed the money.


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Old Post Aug 18th, 2003 06:01 PM
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Phoenix
Luna Lovegood

Gender: Female
Location: in a double decker bus...

Anyone else got any?


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Old Post Aug 18th, 2003 06:01 PM
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Phoenix
Luna Lovegood

Gender: Female
Location: in a double decker bus...

anyone? i thought they were funny...


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Old Post Aug 18th, 2003 06:58 PM
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Lightningrod
gay o' time

Gender: Male
Location: Arizona

Mary had a little lamb,
You heard the tale before,
But did you know,
She passed her plate and had a little more.

It really isn't that funny I know...but this is the only one that I could think of.


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Old Post Aug 18th, 2003 07:14 PM
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diegocala
Replicant

Gender: Male
Location: Tempe, AZ United States

Mary had a little lamb
Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her,
between two hunks of bread.


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--Siggie Created by Master Godshinto

Whatever happened to my Rock N Roll?
Come in, she said, I'll give you shelter from the storm

Old Post Aug 18th, 2003 08:56 PM
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ChinaNiki
Dancing Queen

Gender: Female
Location: The Pyramid

Jack and Jill went up the hill
Each with a buck and a quarter
Jill came down with $2.50


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Made by the talented Godshinto

Old Post Aug 18th, 2003 08:59 PM
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cermiestar
kitten

Gender: Female
Location: London

mary had a little lamb,
she tied it two a pylon,
a thousand volts went up it's bum and turned it into nylon!

mary had a little lamb,
she ate it with mince sauce,
and everywhere that mary went the lamb went too, of course.

big grinbig grinbig grinbig grin

Old Post Aug 18th, 2003 09:08 PM
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Ushgarak
Paladin

Gender: Male
Location: Chelmsford, Essex, UK

Co-Admin

Phoe! And I thought you were such a NICE girl!


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"We've got maybe seconds before Darth Rosenberg grinds everybody into Jawa burgers and not one of you buds has the midi-chlorians to stop her!"

"You've never had any TINY bit of sex, have you?"

BtVS

Old Post Aug 18th, 2003 10:43 PM
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unibrow
The Bored One

Gender: Unspecified
Location: Country of Eh's n Aboot's

jack and jill went up the hill to fetch some marijuana
jack got high unzipped his fly and said "do ya wanna?"
jill said yes and dropped her dress and then they had some fun
silly jill forgot the pill and then they had a son! confused


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Mr.Garrison: okay children lets start the day with some new math problems what is 5x2?
Cmon children dont be shy just give it ur best shot.
Yes Clide?
Clide: 12?
Mr.G: okay now lets try to get an answer from someone whos not a complete retard
anyone? cmon dont be shy!
Kyle: i think i know the answer mr. garrison
Cartman: meh meh meh meh meh meh meh meh
Kyle: shut up fat boy
Cartman: hey! dont call me fat u f***ing jew!
Mr.Garrison: eric did u just say the "f" word?
Cartman: jew?
Kyle: no hes talking about f*** u cant say f*** in school u f***ing fatass
Mr.G: kyle!
Cartman: why the f*** not?!
Mr.G: eric!
Stan:dude u just said f*** again!
Mr.G: stanley!
Kenny:f***
Mr.G: kenny!
Cartman: whats the big deal? it doesnt hurt anybody! f*** f***ity f*** f*** f***
Mr.G: HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO GO SEE THE SCHOOL COUNSELOR?!
Cartman: how would u like to suck my balls?!
Mr.G: WHAT DID YOU SAY?!
Cartman: oh im sorry im sorry actually what i said was *picks up megaphone*
HOW WOULD U LIKE TO SUCK MY BALLS MR GARRISON?!
Stan: holy shit dude!

Old Post Aug 19th, 2003 01:50 AM
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BOPRecruit 16
Hunter By Nature

Gender: Female
Location: City of Angels

this isn't a nursery rhyme, it's a play on a christmas song that i think my dad taught me:

"batman in the kitchen, robin in the hall, and joker in the bathroom...peeing on the wall!"

can't remember how the rest goes. ~lmao~


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Old Post Aug 19th, 2003 04:23 AM
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Phoenix
Luna Lovegood

Gender: Female
Location: in a double decker bus...

quote:
Originally posted by Ushgarak
Phoe! And I thought you were such a NICE girl!


I WAS.... but then i went to pirates of the carribean and wanted to be a pirate too!!!


I'm starting small... I plan to comandeer a ship by this time next week!


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Old Post Aug 19th, 2003 01:22 PM
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