Gender: Female Location: every which way but loose
Well good god people.
Here's an idea, smile!!
I get that something's missing feeling, but I enjoy the challenge of having something to look forward to. If I had everything, if there was nothing missing, I'd get so goddamned bored! I know myself well enough to be able to say that if everything in my life was perfect and rosy, I'd hate it. Period.
Gender: Male Location: Huntington Beach, California
Quiters! Get off the computer and do something fun.
Smile!
Don't be that person who walks around frowning. You probably don't laugh enough either. Stop conforming to your friends and be yourself. Also don't forget to drink lots of milk for strong bones!!!
Gender: Male Location: Welfare Kingdom of California
That's a very good point!
The only thing that can keep a person keep down is their own self! If you get the blues try to get over them! Life must go on. If you feel emptyness try to find something to fill it in. There is a huge world out there.......go and explore it.
Guys... Just smiling doesn't make depression go away... You can't pretend you're not depressed when you are, it just makes the problem worse. I'm all for going out and doing something with yourself, but at the same time, saying "smile and laugh more" doesn't solve anything.
Gender: Male Location: Huntington Beach, California
totally does.
Depression comes and goes.....you only make it worst by thinking that smiling and laughing doesn't make it go away. You people all think of the negatives, and you worry about Murphy's Law too much. Nothing is ever as bad as it seems.
you're all the same "emptiness" people who have steak knife marks on your wrist as some sort of cry for help as a youth. Get a life....
Gender: Female Location: every which way but loose
Uh, I have those marks on my wrists. They're fading, along with any traces of depression I once had. The depression will be back, I have no doubt of that. But just as they say "an apple a day" etc, it's pretty much the same concept with depression. A smile a day is one more than you would have had, had you not bothered. It's a small step towards happiness, but at least it's not a step back..........
Obviously, forcing a contrived smile won't help anything if you're truly depressed, that's just common sense. However, real laughter will help I think. So when you're feeling down, watch comedy central.
Gender: Female Location: every which way but loose
Agreed. No amount of sticky tape is gonna hold them droops up if you're truly depressed. But the fact that you're trying gives a small amount of satisfaction. A little glimmer of pride in the fact that you're alive and facing another day, regardless of whether your lips are up or down, is sometimes all it takes to start fighting depression. When I was at my lowest point, I never wanted to die. I already felt worse than dead, alive and feeling like I was missing my soul, my insides. So I forced myself to smile with at least one person, to laugh with someone, every day. Of course I missed days, but every time I managed to do this, I felt a sense of achievement. It was something I had done, and it reminded me who was in control. Me. And look who's here now, talking about it. Me.
Laughter is the best medicine for sure. I dont think im depressed so to speak, its more ... a curiousity really, trying to figure things out. Its only occasional as well, thankfully.
Gender: Female Location: every which way but loose
FFS Link, climb out of the cutlery drawer!!
Are you with me? Good. Now I can outline the way it really was. Should never have been, but was.......
About three days ago I found a very old face powder tub of mine that I had when I was about 15. It's got a screwtop lid, and another level beneath which the puff sits on. Just imagine my horror when I lifted the puff and laying oh so neatly beneath it were four razor blades. Blades that I had manually ripped from my razors and hidden in my powder tub.
I felt physically sick. At the fact that I went through so many motions, so much careful planning, all so I could carve myself up in order to make my world a better place. Not only had I done this, I had forgotten about it. My mind automatically erased my hiding the blades when I got myself out of the depression. I think it's true that your mind and memory can take on a life of it's own with regard to trauma.
Can I be brutally honest? Link, you'll probably think I'm nuts, but considering you never quite thought I was sane, I'm not too fussed. And BF, if you have nothing to say other than "lame", "sad" or "get over it", I'd rather you said nothing at all. Just a friendly request.
One of the most vivid memories I have of cutting myself is like watching a home video. Almost as if I am watching myself through someone else's eyes. I can recall all too well slicing my left arm 146 times and counting the gashes. To this day, I can't explain what made me sit and count them. The closest I can come to a reason is that perhaps I was, in some sick, deluded way, proud of my 'handiwork'. This is what makes other people assume it's attention seeking. But I can say truthfully that I told no-one about my antics for over a year, so I know that personally it was not for anyone else's benefit that I etched two inch long welts into my skin.
The one valid reason I still use to this day, to kind of justify to myself the reason behind it, is that it was, for me, pain transferral. If I had an aching heart, stinging pain in my arms made it abate. If I had a pounding head, watching myself bleed made it soften. I don't for one second expect you guys to understand, but I would appreciate a little empathy. Not just for me, but for everyone who has been through it, is going through it, or even knows someone close who does it.
I apologise now if my recollections have been a little too well described, but it was only for those who profess not to comprehend what goes through the distorted mind of a self harmer. I hope you can relate a little better now that I have let you into mine.
Link, for the record, I've never cut myself. I'm not one of those whiney little teenagers who pretends to be depressed for attention, I don't wear black and write the same cliched poetry that's been done a million times before by a million other faux-depressed teenagers... Obviously you've never been truly depressed. I have, and believe it or not, "put a smile on" doesn't do a damn thing.
What does help is to get your ass out of the house, go out with your friends, shoot some hoops, go see a concert, do whatever you like doing. Maybe I'm misinterpreting your reply, but this:
"Smile!
Don't be that person who walks around frowning."
...sure sounds like you think it'll just go away if you pretend it's not there.
I knew a girl in middle school who was like that, she always acted happy around her friends and other people, nobody who knew her casually would've suspected for a second that she was depressed... She was 13 or 14 at that time, which was when her parents decided to go through her locker at school and found a bottle of vodka or something in there. Same with my cousin, I saw her at parties and stuff, she acted fine, it was hard to believe that this was the same person who had tried to hang herself twice. So what you do around other people, or even how you feel around other people, is no indication of whether or not you're depressed.
Syren> Damn, sorry to hear about that Hard to know what to say to something like that, all I can say is, don't let the fact that you cut yourself before get you down again... That's in the past, and you can't control what you did in the past, only how you deal with it now.
Putting on a face pleases others who dont want to deal with you, but it does nothing for you, you still feel the same way, even worse because you can't get over why you're unhappy.
When I get sad or whatever my friends know better than to force me to smile, for me the feeling goes away quickly, and my friends understand because this happens very rarely, and they go through the same thing.
And for the record, I have never harmed myself, and would never consider it, I find other ways to deal with it I suppose.
Gender: Female Location: every which way but loose
Well good for you Irene, and I mean that genuinely.
Unfortunately, there are people out there who harm themselves, and many of them do not do it for attention, or simply cannot help themselves. It's the attention seekers and wannabe manic depressives who give the truly messed up people a bad name. And to me, that's really sad
DR: Thanks mate, no worries. It's hard to find something to say to that sort of thing, I didn't expect any replies, I just wanted to clear a few things up, get stuff off my chest. But cheers
Gender: Male Location: Huntington Beach, California
Ummm...note the part where I said "get off the computer and do something fun"
Depression is all in your head, so yes you can simply "make it go away."
Your mind is what makes depression exsist, and your mind is what can make depression go away. You'll say "it's not that easy" but when it all boils down....that's exactly what it is.
You are only making your depression worst by saying things like "it can't just go away" Quit letting your damn emotions get the better of you.
"Putting on a face" and "acting happy" is complete and utter crap. I go through it almost daily with a girl I really care about and it's just because she's afraid to tell me how she really feels. She makes things worst by keeping them inside. If you have problems, talk to your friends and family about it, that's what friends are for. If you don't trust any of your friends, then maybe you should really consider finding new ones that you can trust.
Having a genuinely good time, and faking it for the sake of others are two entirely different things. Do what DR said, go shoot some hoops, go exert some energy, do the things you love most in life. If you still think you're depressed, that's only because you keep telling yourself you're depressed.
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Last edited by Linkalicious on Jul 8th, 2004 at 01:47 PM
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Jul 7th, 2004 11:22 PM
Hard to know what to say to something like that, all I can say is, don't let the fact that you cut yourself before get you down again... That's in the past, and you can't control what you did in the past, only how you deal with it now.
