Deadpool would be so awsome in a movie, but they prob make him boring like they did spider-mans sense of humor "here's your change" sheesh, for saying sam raimi has like 1000 comics of spidey he could at least learn his sense of humor a bit more.
Spider-Man-" oh puh-lease if I was a mutant could I.... Okay I don't have a good comeback."
Spider-Man- "Er...Devon You and your friends may want to relocate far away from here...While I must let you know that violence is the last bastion of the unintelligent It looks like im not going to be able to talk my way out of this."
Juggernaught- "Your calling me stupid now?"
Spidey- "Youd just not gonna be happy unless we fight are you?"
Juggs "looks that way don't it?"
Spidey- "Good afternoon officers"
cop- "your the big bad man?"
spidey- "what?er no, you must be talking about the guy behind me, but I wouldnt..."
Cop-"Move it wallcrawler Before i run you in for obstruction of justice."
Spidey "Okay...but whatever you do don't call him stupid!"
Cop- "don't call who stupid"
Juggs- "Who are you calling stupid!?"
Cop- "Oh jeeze"
Spidey- "Not to worry buddy boy escape isnt part of my game plan...speaking of games I have a real hot one I'd like to share with you! My only trouble is I don't know what to call it Ninja Jam..or wall wacker! What do you think fellas? I'm open to feedback. I know its no Turok the dinosaur hunter but one makes do with whats at hand."
Spidey- "Hang on sweety you'll be the envy of all your friends when you told em you went webslinging"
Girl- "My bike! whyd you leave it behind? what kind of hero are you? I-I'll bet captain america would have found a way to save me and my bike"
Spidey- "Are you seriouse? I'm in the middle of a fight!"
Girl- "thats not my problem you owe me a new one! My daddys a lawyer I'll sue if you don't come across"
Doc Ock- "I would be amused by your current predicment If i were not appaled by your utter stupidity, the child is unappreciative and a hinderance, the intelligent course is to discard her."
Girl- "ARRRAGH your gonna be mean and throw me away you belong in jail like my daddy says"
Spidey- "relax kid i'll get you to safety"
Girl- "And buy me a new bike?"
Spidey- "Don't push your Luck!"
silence
Spidey- "Did he just explode?!...I can't wrap my brain around this Xan I just assume your crew is going to handlethings from here and call it a night? the X-men are used to dealing with stuff like this...right?"
Wolvy- "Somewhat...I gotta admitt though Cyclops would never let me hear the end of it if i just throw this in his lap I think I'm just gonna call S.H.I.E.L.D"
Spidey- "You got their number?"
Wolverine "Yeah I got Nick on speed dial"
Spidey "Realy? You've got a direct line right to Fur? I've always got to go through his secretary. I didnt even think Captain America had his direct line....Um...Can I have that number?
Wolverine " No"
Spidey " actuly wolverine could you handle this from here? My wife is probaly worried sick"
Wolverine " your Married?"
Spidey "You find that hard to belive? You've seen me without the mask. I'm Totaly hot"
Wolverine "Oh yeah...I forgot."
Spidey(See's X-23) "Oh man...WOLVERINE GOOD LORD! What did they do to you?!"
X-23 " RAAAAGHHH"
Spidey "was it something I said?...Ok I take it back you don't remind me of wolverine at all...You can tell I'm lieing can't you"
X-23 "Leave me alone I'm not talking to you your crazy"
Spidey " ok thats cool wolverine hated me at first you'll come around"
X-23 "He still does every1 hates you"
Spidey " Everyone?Not everyone?...Realy?"
Cap "I don't hate you...but you can be kind of annoying from time to time...It's not that big of a dea. We've gotten used to tunning you out for the most part"
Spidey" No love for a fellow Avendure cap? thats cold"
Spidey " Oh good someone has done their civic duty and called in the police...Now lets get out of here before they do their civic duty and try to arrest us"
Moonknight "They do that with you too?"
Spidey "Your kidding? Thats my shtick. You'd think I was a mutant or something so many people hate me"
Frenchie " Pardon moi sir--but it appears there is a bank robbery"
Moonknight " brind us in Frenchie and let us out we'll put a stop to this
Spidey "No--thats fine--just assume I'll help, I'v got nothing eles to do realy, i realy want to help out did that sound rude? I didn't mean for it to be rude"
(they get shot down)
Spidey "you guys ok?"
Moonknight " yeah..Frenchie get out of here Its not safe, Spider-man are you ok?"
Spidey "Yeah sorry about your spaceship"
Moonkinght " Its okay I've got 2 more Frenichie will probaly be back with another one to pick us up by the time we're done with whoever shot us done"
Spidey "Oh man the take out My wife is gonna kill me"
Moonknight " Your Married?"
Spidey "Why does that suprise every1?"
Spidey " From bowling pins to super elephants...why are'nt we winning?...Stupid ring"
Daredevil " What in the world just happend? I thought you were fighting the Ringmaster!"
Spidey "I don't know--He's all cosmic now. Got some new ring just-uh-die knowing hes not as lame as before"
Moonkinght "that brings me no comfort whatsoever"
(Spider-man returns home very late and MJ has gone to bed waiting for the takeout)
Spidey "Aw crap"
(Sneaks past MJ)
MJ " It better have been thanos again. thats all I can say if it was'nt Thanos Don't even bother telling me who it was...I swear if you tell me it was the vulture i will punch you in the face"
Nova "WHAT IS THAT!?"
Spidey "Thats Doc Strange's astral projection--You'v never met Doc strange? Half the time we team up its with his creepy ghost , hes a cool guy you'll like him"
Doc Strange " I'm standing right here...sort of, We don't have time for this something disastrouse has taken place and we must take drastic action, you 2 will meet me back at my abode momentarliy"
Nova "Any Idea what this is about?"
Spidey " No but bet you 10 bucks its cosmic"
Nova " are you ok?"
Spidey "I don't know do I have a tail? Please tell me I don't hve a tail"
Nova " No tail"
Spidey "Good good DON'T TOUCH ANYTHING!"
Nova "Why are you telling me youre the one knocking stuff over...You could have sent us back in time or into hell or something...You think he can hear us?"
Spidey "I hope not, If he saw what i did he woulf kick my ass"
Spider-ben "good thing the police has code blue to catch all those super villains on the loose, especialy the ones who have made good there escape...What are all the sirens for Lt. Stone some1 double parked"
Lt.Stone " Verrrry funny"
Cops "CODE BLUE EVERYONE FREEZE! By the authority of the new york city police
Spider-Ben "Man! you guys are slower than the postal service"
Cops "Everybody freeaze Code Blue NYPD and we have a warrant for the arrest of Mac Gargan"
Spider-Ben "Guys did you have to come so early?...we barley had to time to sell the bookrights, make the tvshow, the movie, bury the poor guy hold a memorial make the actuion figure do the cartoon cancel the cartoon...Now you boys be careful we don't want the corpse...oh I mean the perpertrtor getting away"
Cop "Har har go eat some bugs"
Spidey " I think every1 got out okay, but I can go back and check. Who was that guy"
MJ " A director. he was mean to me"
Spidey "Look a puppy in troyuble"
Mj "Go get him!"
Loki " What are the green bits?"
Spidey "No1 knows "
Loki "How can you eat things you do not evn know what they are"
Spidey "Hey its the American way"
Spidey "I want you to leave your tennants alone, Everytime you do we play thump"
Lanlord "Thump?"
Spidey "I web you to the ceiling, the webbing lasts a few hous then it dissolves, When it dissolves gravity says hello and...thump"
Spidey "Hi my names Spidey I'm here to deliver a singing strip-o-gram, so come out and play this thong is killing me, but what kind of thinger would i be without a killer thong, I athk you?"
Lamont "Y'know I almost feel sorry for her"
Spidey "She slapped me"
Lamont "Then shes definatly my kind of woman"
Spidey "was this my coffe or was that my coffee"
(Both look)
Lamont "Forget it I aint taking the chance"
Spidey " ME either"
Lamont "For all I know if I drink from the same cup as you I might end up a costume myself"
Spidey "The annoying lame man I like it"
Lamont "Shove it"
Lamont " One costume is plenty in my life thanks"
Spidey " 2 Dates and already we're going steady your such a sweety"
Lamont "One more remark and I'm playing YMCA on the boom-box.LOUD.In German"
Spidey "I'm all yours"
Spidey "You know it never occured to me untill now I could probaly sell this stuff on ebay..."Buy spider-mans butt-print in a plaster wall"...Also available in concrete bricks, Steel, Lead, Iron"
(Spider signal lights up an alley"
Lamont "So...I'm supposed to be impressed?"
Spidey "You like it? I could loan it to you if you want"
Lamont " Yeah? That'd be great thanks. We could put it on the roof and use it whenever we want you to come over, so we can kick the crap outta you"
Spidey "Yeah right you and what thunder god"
Lamont "Theres more than one?"
Spidey "Sigh dosen't any1 read the paper anymore?"
Lamont "Just the bugle"
Spidey "razemfrazem"
Spidey "Nothing i just burped...A bunch of kids have gone missing nobody eles seems to care but you"
lamont " yeah why?"
Spidey " because of the way the moonlight dances in your eyes you big studly guy. and the sister of 1 of your regulars said you were a stand-up guy. You gonna make a liar out of her?
Lamont " get in the freakin' car before some1 spots you a whips out a can of raid"
Spidey "thanks.And I meant the part about the moonlight--"
You don't know much about Venom then. They don't really make him any stronger than he already is. They haven't warped his character either, unless you want him to be a psycho obsessed with killing Spider-man, which got pretty old. None of them have ignored continuity either.
Maybe it was just that 1 story I read then where Toxin was first introduced, last time I checked Venom wasn't on par with carnage in strength and wasnt obbssesd with killing innocent people.
KMC Community Forums
Feb 19th, 2006 10:50 AM
Because
