Men in Black II Review
by Rose 'Bams' Cooper (bams AT 3blackchicks DOT com)July 9th, 2002
'3BlackChicks Review...'
MEN IN BLACK II (2002)
Rated PG-13; running time 88 minutes
Studio: Columbia Pictures
Genre: Comedic Science Fantasy
Seen at: Goodrich Quality 16 (Ann Arbor, Michigan)
Official site: http://www.spe.sony.com/movies/meninblack/
IMDB site: http://us.imdb.com/Details?0120912
Written by: Robert Gordon, Barry Fanaro
(based on the comic book by Lowell Cunningham)
Directed by: Barry Sonnenfeld
Cast: Tommy Lee Jones, Will Smith, Rosario Dawson, Lara Flynn Boyle, Johnny Knoxville, Rip Torn, Tony Shalhoub, Patrick Warburton, Michael Jackson, Biz Markie
Review Copyright Rose Cooper, 2002
Review URL: http://www.3blackchicks.com/2002reviews/bamsmib2.html
I know this'll come as a shock to my regular readers, but I have a problem with accepting just any old crap that comes down the pike, especially as movies go. Hey, I can't help it: I have a hard time just letting movies run rampant with my Disbelief's Suspension. On the other hand, there are some things that just defy logic, purposefully; some things are just supposed to be laughed at, and let go before they have a chance to rest firmly on your medulla oblongata.
Case in point: the MEN IN BLACK series. I've never seen the first movie all the way through, but I get the general gist o' the thing. And despite what I'd heard here and there about how bad the second movie was supposed to be, I decided to give it a chance anyway.
Should'a just rented the first one, dag.
THE STORY (WARNING: **spoilers contained below**)
MEN IN BLACK II picks up the MIB story four years hence. Agent Jay (Will Smith) is now The Man In Black, but he's feeling the loss of his partner Agent Kay (Tommy Lee Jones) acutely, since Kay was neuralized and is now working as - what else? - a postal worker. Jay is feelin' no love from the public, either: of necessity, the Men are under-appreciated, considering they are ultimately the ones who maintain the peace in our little corner of the galaxy.
So lonely is Jay that he goes against agency rules and fails to neuralize the lovely Laura (Rosario Dawson) after she witnessed a sho'nuff strange occurrence during a routine crime. It seems that there's this evil alien named Serleena (Lara Flynn Boyle) going around telling Victoria's Secret (so as to hide the fact that she's one ugly Medusa lookin' thing). Serleena is convinced that there's this Light that she has to have, and that Agent Kay is the key to finding it. After Serleena Wrecks Thangs at MIB Central, Jay has to bring Kay back into service so they can kick some alien butt. Only problem is, Kay doesn't remember anything about the MIB. Ooh, will wackiness ensue?
THE UPSHOT
Generously speaking, MEN IN BLACK II wasn't bad, per se. Coming from the perspective of one who hadn't seen the first one, I wouldn't recommend part II as a primer into the Wacky MIB Universe...but it had its moments. Most of those moments came from Agent Frank The Pug, the cutest ugly dog this side of the Boston Terrier. I heard myself guffawing a few times at Frank and some of the various other creatures - though not as much as I had hoped to.
My big Issue with MIB II was with the storyline. In short, it was dumb (even if intentionally so), and I quickly tired of caring anything about it or the characters involved. I kept hoping Jamie Lee Curtis would take over Serleena's body from Lara Flynn Boyle, because Boyle wasn't doing much with it; likewise, I wonder who the wonderful Rip Torn pissed off, to have had such little face time on film. I cringed at Tony Shalhoub's Jeebs (and not just because he was butt ugly), and only the Biz Markie and Michael Jackson cameos, and Patrick Warburton's amusing Agent Tee, showed any real promise.
The actors and characters were clearly a second-thought to all the magic that went into post-production. Try as they might, Will Smith and the humorously peevish Tommy Lee Jones, couldn't make me forget that for the most part, MIB II was more about the gee whiz of movie FX, than about anything they had to bring to the table. Too bad; I was hoping that at least some the "gee whiz" would come from the humans.
I found this movie pretty forgettable; aside from Frank's great sight gags [so *that's* who let them out!], nothing really stayed with me after I left the theater. But at least now that I've seen MIB II, I'm satisfied: I don't need to see part III. After all, a mind is a terrible thing to waste. Even during the lazy hazy crazy days of summer.
BAMMER'S BOTTOM LINE
I'll continue my "Big Summer Blockbusters aren't really trying to make you think" generous streak and stop expecting much from movies during Popcorn Season. MEN IN BLACK II mostly hits its aim as Mindless Entertainment, though even at that, I was underwhelmed. Now, if they had just Kept It Real and made Michael Jackson an alien...
MEN IN BLACK II rating: flashing yellowlight
Rose "Bams" Cooper
Webchick and Editor,
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Copyright Rose Cooper, 2002
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