Steel Review
by Doug Skiles (rskiles AT mail DOT win DOT org)August 21st, 1997
STEEL
Starring: Shaquille O'Neal (John Henry Irons/Steel), Annabeth Gish (Lt. Sparks), Richard Roundtree (Uncle Joe), Judd Nelson (Lt. Nathaniel Burke)
Directed by: Kenneth Johnson
Written by: Kenneth Johnson
Rated PG-13 by the MPAA for violence and strong language
Reviewed by: Doug Skiles
Los Angeles street thugs are being supplied with a whole new kind of weaprony. These are weapons that can injure and incapacitate a target, but do not kill. Lt. Nathaniel Burke is supplying these weapons to the gangs so that the world can see the power he has available to them, for the right price. But these weapons were created by John Henry Irons, and Johnny's not happy when he comes home to LA to find his weapons being used for evil. Feeling responsible for this, he calls on his old friends Lt. Sparks and Uncle Joe to help become someone who is able to stand up to the gangs. Man. Metal. Hero. STEEL.
Let's face it, STEEL is one goofy flick. Any movie starring Shaq is already asking for trouble. Add to that the retro-'70s SHAFT-esque soundtrack, and the fact that Shaft himself (Richard Roundtree) is actually in the movie, and you've got one seriously wacked-out production. But that's part of what makes STEEL kind of amusing. I smiled every time I heard them play that funky music, white boy. I grinned when Judd Nelson strutted right up to our hero actually tried to be intimidating towards O'Neal (who, of course, is at least two feet taller than him). I even laughed when a street gang member, decked out in leather, gold chains, and weaponry, uttered "word?" to the prospect of a turkey hot dog. I doubt that this was actual intentional humor... but it was so downright silly that I liked it. What can I say?
That's not to say that this is good cinema in any sense. STEEL is pretty basically average, or slightly below that. Some aspects are irritating, like Johnny's Grandma, and the running gag about how Shaq can't make free throws (basically true). Shaq's no thespian (I'd love to see this guy try Shakespeare... "Othello," anyone?), but he does a better job here than George Clooney did in this summer's BATMAN & ROBIN at least (then again, *I* could do a better acting job than Clooney did in that movie). And the action sequences, though likable, are also unspectacular.
Still, there's something pleasant about the feel of all this. The disco music playing while our nice-guy superhero takes down the bad guys is something to see. When Steel first stops a mugging and returns the stolen wallet to its rightful owners, the lucky couple is on the news that night, saying, in amazing "He was so... polite!" Kinda makes you wish we were a little more like Steel, doesn't it? After all, who among us *wouldn't* like being seven feet tall?
Rating: C+
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