Warning Labels

Due to increasing products liability litigation, American liquor
manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following
warning labels be placed immediately on all varieties of alcohol
containers:
_____
WARNING
The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell
happened to your bra and panties.
_____
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when
you are not.
_________
WARNING
The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.
_________
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and
over again that you love them.
_____
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.
__________
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are
really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.
__________
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically
converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.
_____
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug
burns on the forehead, knees and lower back.
________
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are
tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.
_____
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing
WITH you.
_____
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.
_____
WARNING:
The crumsumpten of alcahol may Mack you tink you can tipe real gode

that reminds me, heres an actjual sign in a parking lot that had a slight typo and this is what it said:"please do not stand or shit down in the middle of the lot" its supposed to be "sit down"

heres one on a hair dryer "do not use while in water" 😂

On christmas Lighs: For Indoor Or outdorr use ONLY

As opposed to???

no you know when you rent a video game from blockbuster, if you look on the back theres a warning saying "theres a chance youll get a seizure, and that you should take a 10-15 minute break every hour, they tell you do this because playing video games for a couple hours can make your muscles, skin and joints hurt they say you should take a break even if you dont feel you need it, and if your hands or wrists hurt they actually tell you to stop playing, and theres about 2 more paragraphs of this crap its great, next time you rent a game look

its not a warning but its one of the best labels, on 2 liter bottles of soda theres always a label saying NO REFILL, which means someone had to try to go back to the store to get a refill

Here is another warning that you can find on a hairdryer:

Do not use while sleeping

yeah ive tried that one a couple of times but i cant seem to pull it off

Here's some more~

On Boot's Children Cough medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication" (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year olds with head-colds off those forklifts)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: may cause drowsiness." (and I'm taking this because??????)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (Now somebody out there, help me on this, I'm a bit confused)

On Sunsbury's Peanuts: "Warning contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)

Here is a few more~

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (Idon't blame the company, I blame the parents on this one)

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap" (and that would be how?????)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chains with your hands or genitals" (......was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

about that chainsaw one, let me tell you that doesnt work. thats why i have to squat when i pee now

Well let me tell you, I could have lived my whole life being perfectly fine without hearing that 😉 lol j/k

its my job to warn and inform 🙂

Somebody else needs to post so cool stuff in here

on a can of axe deoderant it says "do not spray in eyes"

"Do not drive with sunshield in place." -- On a cardboard sunshield that keeps the sun off the dashboard.

blah blah blah blah blah blah

what? 😕

nothing I'm just bored is all

wells thats no reason to speak gibberish is it?

ghslfjfklshjsfklhjkldfh 😄