Originally posted by OnenessFor the last time I'm not ur cousin but thanks!
Now all I'm capable of is puffing my chest.In karate there was an advantage and disadvantage to my rage when it came back a little bit. I couldn't spar using proper technique cause all I wanted to do was hit as hard as I could again and again and again and again. No control over myself. No restraint, no hesitation. The main instructor was balled up in blocks, like covering everything up, he never got a chance to hit me. He was older, stronger, and the most experienced sparrer there. NO ONE else would spar me.
Remember when we boxed and you were hitting my head like a soccer ball? My karate gloves didn't protect me like your boxing gloves?? lolol
But I didn't stop until I popped you in the face just one time, that one time. I can dish some shit.
Now imagine that kind of emotion controlled, refined, with technique. It took wrestling for me to learn some control over my emotions. Because I just wasn't on the same physical level as some of my opponents.
Though in my mind, I could have been a state champion. If I hadn't gotten so stressed, sick of the sport, fear will destroy you in a match. For someone who has a propensity to react irrationally, full control never came. If I'd had full control of my emotions, I'd have been pretty ****ing good at any combat sport.
I was the only non-neurotypical who made it to varsity that I know of around this area or anywhere. I have more emotional control than most people with my disorder, that's for sure.