The Gentleman's Club

*wakes up for a second to quote....*

Subject: How to Shower

How to Shower Like a Woman

1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups
4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.
5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.
8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
10. Rinse conditioner off hair.
11. Shave armpits and legs.
12. Turn off shower.
13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.
14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.
16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

How To Shower Like a Man

1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ass.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Wash your face
6. Wash your armpits.
7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.
9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
11. Shampoo your hair.
12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
13. Pee.
14. Rinse off and get out of shower.
15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
16. Admire wiener size in mirror again.
17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
19. Throw wet towel on bed.

* takes a shower like a man *

😕 wasn't that posted before? I remeber TMH commenting on that...

he always scores 😄 good for u pel

Dang, just about had her.

haha never saw the shower thing b4

Originally posted by $¥®€Ñ
*wakes up for a second to quote....*

Subject: How to Shower

How to Shower Like a Woman

1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups
4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.
5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.
8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
10. Rinse conditioner off hair.
11. Shave armpits and legs.
12. Turn off shower.
13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.
14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.
16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

How To Shower Like a Man

1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ass.
4. Get in the shower.
5. Wash your face
6. Wash your armpits.
7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower.
9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
11. Shampoo your hair.
12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
13. Pee.
14. Rinse off and get out of shower.
15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
16. Admire wiener size in mirror again.
17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
19. Throw wet towel on bed.

*continues to stroke hair gently

Sent to me in an E-mail babe. I prefer company in the shower. close your eye's drift away and I'll see you on the other side. *kisses*

You guys are funny!!!!

Hahahahahaaaa!!!!!!

This is truly a heart-warming story about the bond formed between a little girl and some builders. This makes you want to believe in the goodness of people and that there is hope for the human race.

A young family moved into a house next door to an empty plot. One day a construction crew turned up to start building a house there. The young
family's 5-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity
going on next door and started talking with the workers.

She hung around and eventually the construction crew, all of them rough
diamond types, more or less adopted her as a kind of project mascot. They chatted with her, let her sit with them while they had coffee and lunch breaks, and gave her little jobs to do here and there to make her feel important. At the end of the first week they even presented her with a pay envelope containing $5.

The little girl took this home to her mother who said all the appropriate
words of admiration and suggested that they take the money she had received to the bank the next day to start a savings account. When they got to the bank the clerk was equally impressed with the story and asked the little girl how she had come by her very own wage packet at such a young age.

The little girl proudly replied, "I worked all last week with a crew
building a house."

"My goodness gracious," said the clerk, "and will you be working on the house again this week, too?"

The little girl replied, "I will if those useless cu*ts at B&Q ever bring us
the fu*king plasterboard!!"

Hahahahahahaaaaa!!!!!!1

Originally posted by $¥®€Ñ
Hahahahahaaaa!!!!!!

This is truly a heart-warming story about the bond formed between a little girl and some builders. This makes you want to believe in the goodness of people and that there is hope for the human race.

A young family moved into a house next door to an empty plot. One day a construction crew turned up to start building a house there. The young
family's 5-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity
going on next door and started talking with the workers.

She hung around and eventually the construction crew, all of them rough
diamond types, more or less adopted her as a kind of project mascot. They chatted with her, let her sit with them while they had coffee and lunch breaks, and gave her little jobs to do here and there to make her feel important. At the end of the first week they even presented her with a pay envelope containing $5.

The little girl took this home to her mother who said all the appropriate
words of admiration and suggested that they take the money she had received to the bank the next day to start a savings account. When they got to the bank the clerk was equally impressed with the story and asked the little girl how she had come by her very own wage packet at such a young age.

The little girl proudly replied, "I worked all last week with a crew
building a house."

"My goodness gracious," said the clerk, "and will you be working on the house again this week, too?"

The little girl replied, "I will if those useless cu*ts at B&Q ever bring us
the fu*king plasterboard!!"

Hahahahahahaaaaa!!!!!!1

😆

Bacon Ill take 3 more beers but after that Im done.

Originally posted by $¥®€Ñ
Hahahahahaaaa!!!!!!

This is truly a heart-warming story about the bond formed between a little girl and some builders. This makes you want to believe in the goodness of people and that there is hope for the human race.

A young family moved into a house next door to an empty plot. One day a construction crew turned up to start building a house there. The young
family's 5-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity
going on next door and started talking with the workers.

She hung around and eventually the construction crew, all of them rough
diamond types, more or less adopted her as a kind of project mascot. They chatted with her, let her sit with them while they had coffee and lunch breaks, and gave her little jobs to do here and there to make her feel important. At the end of the first week they even presented her with a pay envelope containing $5.

The little girl took this home to her mother who said all the appropriate
words of admiration and suggested that they take the money she had received to the bank the next day to start a savings account. When they got to the bank the clerk was equally impressed with the story and asked the little girl how she had come by her very own wage packet at such a young age.

The little girl proudly replied, "I worked all last week with a crew
building a house."

"My goodness gracious," said the clerk, "and will you be working on the house again this week, too?"

The little girl replied, "I will if those useless cu*ts at B&Q ever bring us
the fu*king plasterboard!!"

Hahahahahahaaaaa!!!!!!1

Cute 🙂

*slides beers to leather*

syren thats a gr8 story

* gives 3 dollar tip to bacon *

thanks again leather*pockets tips*

cute. cute. cute.

hey L.L. 411 wheres enya been lately?

I haven't seen her in a while. *whispers to Bacon* How are these people GENTLEMEN????

Me run. Kit has ben an ass. I HATE KIT!!!! DIE ASS!!!

beer please!