The Love That Shattered A Man...

Summary: Love, hatred, and death all spin a web of pain into Severus Snape's life and only one person can save him

Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by J. K. Rowling. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended. It's just fan fiction!

Author's Pre-Note: Thanks to all of you who have read and reviewed this story since December 1999. It always surprises me to find out how many people remember it and how many people like it. In fact, a lovely lady named Carol Graymalking liked it so much, she translated it into Portuguese!

< >That said about how this story is, it was obviously written before Goblet of Fire and doesn't completely connect to what we learned about Severus Snape in that book.

The story starts when…

< >Severus Snape sat at a table the Hogwarts library, his hand wrapped tightly around a quill, gritting his teeth in anger. He stared down at the parchment in front of him, not being able to see it because of the red, boiling bubbles in front of his eyes. He could hear his classmates, James Potter, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew, all laughing about him, still in fresh memory of what had happened in Transfiguration earlier that day. They didn't know he was behind a bookshelf, listening to their every word, though he highly doubted that would have mattered.

< >Severus was good in all subjects, especially in Potions and Defense Against the Dark Arts. The only exception was Transfiguration, where he was struggling a bit, and that fact was the soul purpose for the entire class laughing earlier that morning. What Severus had done would be, he knew, laughed about and reflected upon for many years to come. He had inadvertantly turned himself into a rabbit. He wasn't Animagi, though, as he figured certain people were. His wand had backfired at the exact moment he had been about to attempt to turn the object in front of him into a rabbit itself.

< >Truth of it all, Severus hadn't completely turned himself into a rabbit; he'd grown whiskers; large pink and white ears; and a large, stark white cottontail. He'd also gotten a terrible case of fleas, which had made him scratch himself constantly as the professor had helped him to the infirmary, laughter trailing behind them.

< >When he had finally emerged from the infirmary, the whole school knew. Even some of the professors had to hide their amused smiles as he hurried past them to the library, where he still was at that very moment.

< >Severus squeezed his eyes shut for a moment, then opened them, the red disappearing from his eyes, but the feeling still there, as one might well imagine. He looked across the room and saw a seventh year Gryffindor who Severus hated along with the rest of the filthy lot, staring past Severus, his angry eyes on the bookshelf behind him, also listening.

< >The seventh year got up after a moment, collected his things, and left, swinging his robes angrily behind him, not even caring to look behind him when he knocked a few books from a bookshelf onto the floor. His name was Thomas Erwin, Head Boy of the year, but he was another story all together.

< >Severus was about to leave the library himself when he heard, "Can you believe that? I mean, how stupid can you get? I'm surprised myself that McGonagall didn't burst out laughing herself! She about turned purple! And when the whole castle had heard, it nearly shook in laughter!"

< >James Potter.

< >That was all Severus needed that day. A self-assured arrogant sodder like James Potter mocking prefect, award winning, soon-to-be-Head-Boy Severus Snape. Severus angrily jumped up from his seat and stormed to where the four Gryffindors sat. They stared at him in surprise, obviously not knowing Severus had been listening to their entire conversation.

< >"If you even think that I did that - " Sirius stifled a laugh, failing to keep a somber expression, " - on bloody purpose, you maggots, you’ve got another thing, you - "

< >"You what?" James asked steadily, rising.

< >Severus smiled at him sinisterly, causing James to blink. The boy looked conflicted, mixed between his own enjoyment and an actual threat. "Laugh all you want, all of you. Maybe you'll eat something at dinner one night and your skin will crawl, Potter. Literally."

< >"Is that a threat, Snape?" Sirius asked in a slow, calm voice, standing up next to James, the others following suit.

< >Severus glared at Sirius. "It's a reality, Black."

< >Lupin laughed, albeit somewhat nervously. "How will you even reach the kitchens?" he asked, a grin growing on his face as his confidence returned.

< >"I know one of you has his ways," Severus replied slowly, making all four of them immediately uncomfortable (all smiles fell to the wayside in silent realization), "and I have mine." With that, he turned on his heel, stalked back to the library table. He swiftly gathered up his things and left the library.

< >Severus knew that he would have no way into the kitchens without anyone seeing, but he doubted the fools that called themselves wizards would realize that. For a while, anyway. Only cooks, House Elves, and those with a bit of help actually managed to wrangle their way into the kitchens.

< >He was walking toward the Slytherin Common Room in the dungeons, when his heart stopped and he nearly dropped his books. Papers fluttered every which way and Severus immediately lowered his eyes away from the sight causing him such turmoil. He scrambled to pick up his papers which had fallen from his grasp.

< >"Can - "

< >Severus fell to his knees as he reached for his History of Magic homework, concerning the voice above him.

< >" - can I help you?" asked a voice. That voice was music to Severus' ears; he wanted to fall into that song, let it carry him far beyond his dreams . . .

< >Severus looked up and felt his face flush in embarrassment. "I - uh - no," he said flatly, glancing down at his scattered papers. Avoiding eye contact with this person was not easy, but he always forced himself to do so. "I - I can manage." His voice faltered as he stuffed his potions paper hastily into a book. "Thanks anyway."

< >Samantha Halloway smiled at him kindly, making his heart race when she looked at him. "Of course you can manage, Severus. You always do." She walked away and Severus stared after her, watching carefully as her long brown hair flew around her in the drafty corridor, and wishing she’d look back at him.

< >He remembered her eyes as he remembered himself. Encrusted like a precious jewel, Samantha was inlaid with dark sapphire eyes. They sometimes looked even like the stars on a clear night. Adorned with her starlight eyes were soft red lips, a perfect nose, all surrounded by lush brown hair. He loved those eyes, he loved that hair, he loved that face, he loved . . . her.

< >Severus shook off these feelings, his face returning to a normal color - he hoped - and gathered up the rest of his papers quickly, then practically running to the Slytherin Common Room.

< >The common room was full of people who gazed sourly in Severus' direction as he strode through the wall. What had occured in Transfiguration was funny when it happened, but now the Slytherins had been told by their Head of House that the incident brought shame to all Slytherins. So, of course, Slytherins young and old alike believed it, and their infamous loathing broke easily through the clouds.

< >"Nice going," a lusty fifth year sneered as Severus strode by.

< >The common room hushed, thinking that Severus, however being smart and resolved most of the time, would surely do something. Severus stopped and looked at the younger boy, staring deep into his eyes, not saying a word. The boy shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

< >Severus finally took his eyes away from him and hurried to his dormitory. He dropped his things on his chest and stretched out on his bed, drawing the curtains, so no one would be able to see him.

< >He slowly pulled out a small piece of crumpled parchment and smoothed it out with his hand. Severus read it over to himself.

Dear Samantha,

< >We've known each other for years, before Hogwarts, as I know you know very well. This letter's purpose is to show how much I love you.

< >I know it sounds absurd. How could Severus Snape ever love another human being other than himself? Well, this is to show I can. I've loved you since we were young, though I never realized it until just recently. I can barely stand to look at you without wanting to blurt out everything I feel. It's madness how much I love you. It nearly drives me insane just to think about you.

< >If you would, would you just please tell me it isn't true for you, since I know you would never be able to love me - no one can. I keep trying to tell myself that you cannot - but I must hear it from your lips, your sweet lips, that you don't love me. I could take it then. Please tell me.

< > < > < > < >Sincerely yours,
< > < > < > < > < >Severus Snape

< >Severus read the letter over in disgust. How juvenile, how ridiculous. God, had he actually written that? Yes, you did, said a nasty voice in his head. What will dear Samantha think? She'll laugh, you know, and tell everyone. The whole school will be laughing at you - again!

< >"Shut up, Samantha wouldn't do that," he muttered to himself, but he couldn't help wondering if what the voice was telling him was actually true. But she probably knew anyway, or at least she suspected. The way he was acting . . . why wouldn't it be obvious? Severus was disgusted with himself and a sneer grew on his lips. He took his wand, crumpled up the paper and tapped the letter, mumbling some few choice words.

< >The letter burst into flames with a small explosion and deteriorated in the air in seconds. Severus caught the last few ashes and stared at them in the palm of his hand. He leaned forward and blew them away. They burst into tiny particles and disappeared from his sight, never to be seen again.

To be continue..

what is this??? is this a real book??? it would be sooo cool if it was, but i've never heard of it...

re😛rincess_rinoa1 Gryffindor's Head Girl

WOW. If tassie sees this she want be so happy, u know she is our head girl!

Is this a fanficstion?? perhaps this needs to go there.

hm........

This needs to go to the Fanfic section!

Hey princess Rinoa1, where can I find the link to this story, the rest of it actually......Can you help me out?

Continuation...

< >The next day, the whole school was still sniggering about Severus's incident. He ignored the taunting laughter and soon it was forgotten momentarily, but he knew in his heart that the incident would be talked about for years to come.

< >Professor McGonagall was edgy around Severus, hardly letting him touch anything, as if he was a ticking time bomb. Severus nearly screamed, "My wand backfired! Get over it, all of you!" . . . but he didn't, of course. That would show disrespect and he usually never showed disrespect to a professor.

< >Severus was in the library again later that day, studying his astronomy charts. He was startled out of his chair when Samantha sat down at the table, across from him, a smile on her face.

< >"S-samantha?" he stuttered. Severus looked down again so she wouldn't see his red face.

< >"Hello, Severus," Samantha said, putting her books on the table in front of his own. "Mind if I sit with you? Since the finals are coming up . . ." She let her words go as she sighed.

< >Severus managed to finally look at her. "Yes, they are," he agreed, his voice faltering once again in front of her. He gulped and looked back at his work.

< >"Are you?"

< >"Am I what?" Severus asked slowly, not looking up.

< >"Going to tell me?"

< >Severus jumped and stared at her, startled.

< >"Going to tell me," Samantha continued slowly, "that I'm going to have to study more, like you always do around these times? Even though I am one of the top students, like you?" She smiled at him and he nearly melted.

< >Severus looked back down again, relieved. "You know you will have to, I cannot get you out of it." He allowed a small smile. "I figure that I must study more for Transfiguration."

< >Samantha laughed. "I heard from a group of Hufflepuffs that your nose was twitching for hours!" She smiled at him, obviously not believing that was true - and it wasn't; it had only twitched while he was trying not to smell the awful medicine given to him, and that had been only for about a minute or two, as he protested.

< >Severus's eyes darkened in anger, though. "My wand backfired," he said quietly after a moment. He gripped his quill tightly in his hand, staring down at his paper, not able to look up.

< >Samantha looked down at her work, not replying. She looked abashed, almost ashamed she'd even brought any of it up.

< >They worked in silence for a while until Samantha got up and left the library, bestowing upon him a simple yet ever sweet good-bye. Severus gazed after her lovingly, watching her every move until he could not see her anymore. He closed his eyes and imagined himself in her arms, just looking into her eyes, forgetting the world around them, just the two of them and no one else . . .

< >Suddenly, someone knocked into the table, shattering Severus's thoughts.

< >"I am so sorry, Severus," the girl said sincerely, bending down to pick up one of his books that had fallen in the collision. She set it back on the table.

< >"Thank you," Severus said vacantly, staring hard at her.

< >"I should be going now," the girl said after a moment of silence. "Good-bye, Severus."

< >"Good-bye, Lily," Severus replied quickly, looking down at his work once more.

< >As Lily Evans walked away, Severus lifted his head, and watched her leave the library. James is lucky to have her, he thought to himself rather enviously. They love each other - it's obvious, no matter what they say. They know it. I know it. Everyone knows it.

< >Severus closed his eyes, miserably melancholy and full of pity for himself. He finally opened his eyes and went to dinner, but he wouldn't speak to anyone, just kept watching Samantha at the Ravenclaw table, wishing he was eating with her.

< >His friend, Dorian Pawel, nudged him after a while. "Severus, stop acting like a zombie! Eat! It's one of our last nights before finals! Enjoy it while it lasts! And stop brooding about the rabbit thing!"

< >"Yeah!" chorused a lot of first and second years, nervous about their own finals.

< >Severus, despite looking sour, ate a small dinner to satisfy Dorian. He wasn't hungry, though. He was in love - and love is more powerful than anything, even evil - or, that is, he thought, most evil.

< >He was up early that next morning, before dawn, and no one was ever up that early. He showered and dressed, then left the common room, walking out onto the school grounds.

< >Severus noticed the Whomping Willow out of the corner of his eye, memories clashing into his head like the warring knights of Medieval times. He cursed to himself and continued to the lake and sat beneath a tree, watching the sun rise through the clouds, turning the sky pink and orange in the lush light of the early dawn.

< >Suddenly, he woke up - he didn't even know he had fallen asleep until that exact second. Someone was shaking him and he pushed their hand away. "Mmm," he mumbled sleepily, rubbing his eyes.

< >"Wake up, sleepy head," said a kind voice.

< >Severus jumped, startled, and stared. Rubeus Hagrid, the gameskeeper, stood in front of him, holding a kettle in one hand, and a pastry in the other. He was smiling down at Severus.

< >"Yeh missed yer breakfast, Severus," Hagrid said, handing Severus the pastry. "C'mon to me hut, I'll get yeh some coffee."

< >Severus pulled himself to his feet and followed the gameskeeper to his hut, which was quite small - it should have been to small for the large man Hagrid was - but almost everyone had to admit, the hut was quite comfortable.

< >"Thank you, Hagrid," Severus said as he was handed a cup of stifling hot coffee.

< >Fang, Hagrid's dog, sat at Severus's feet, his head between his paws, eyes closed.

< >"What were yeh doin' out there?" Hagrid asked as he sat down, shaking the hut.

< >"Sleeping," Severus said simply.

< >Hagrid laughed. "Well, tha' was quite o'vious. All las' night, eh?"

< >"No. I came out at dawn."

< >Hagrid eyed him sharply.

< >Severus shook his head. "No, I didn't come out to spy on anyone. Not this time, anyway." He smiled slightly as he sipped the hot liquid that few drank at Hogwarts. "I daresay! No!"

< >Hagrid laughed again. "'Member, if I catch yeh again - "

< >"It's Azkaban for me, for sure, isn't is?" Severus demanded with a growing smile.

< >Hagrid nodded, serious. "Sure, kids can go to Azkaban. For sure. So, what were yeh really doin' out there, Severus?" he asked.

< >"Thinking, I guess." Severus set down his cup. "Thinking."

< >"'Bout what?"

< >"You pry a lot, don't you?" Severus asked a bit sharply.

< >Hagrid laughed softly. "Son, when yer in my house, I ask questions. It's call’ conversation, Severus."

< >Severus sighed and leaned back. "Maybe I just haven't been around enough people to have conversational skills," he replied softly. "Or maybe it's just me . . ."

< >Hagrid shook his head dismissively. "Let me tell yeh something - every year, I get a bunch of sixth and seventh years comin' down here, askin' advice." Severus looked up and Hagrid pointed at him knowingly. "Now, I been 'ere at 'ogwarts a while, yeh hear? I 'ave an idea 'bout what's goin' on with yeh." Hagrid smiled mischievously.

< >"Yeah?" Severus asked, sneering, suddenly uncomfortable. "What?"

< >"Yer in love."

< >Severus stared at Hagrid, disbelieving. He hadn't truly believed what Hagrid had been saying. "How - ?"

< >Hagrid slapped the table, laughing. "Severus, what di' I jus' tell yeh?"

< >Severus was speechless and Hagrid laughed again, then smiled kindly at him. "Don't think it's sum kind o' disease, Severus - 'veryone falls in love sometime in their lives! It's normal!" He slapped the table again and laughed.

< >"What about you?" Severus asked curiously.

< >"Whatta 'bout me?" Hagrid replied loftily, looking to the ceiling as if there was something interesting up there.

< >"Have you ever fallen in love?" Severus could see that the giant was trying to avoid answering the question and he did.

< >Hagrid shifted uncomfortably. "Yeh'd better go, Severus, the professors will be wonderin' where yeh are."

< >Severus blinked, surprised, but left graciously, thanking Hagrid.

To be continue...

I just want to clarify that... i am not the one who wrote this fanfic.. I really like it and so, I post it so that everyone can scan this story.. hope u like it too... Thank you..

< >As he strode across the grounds toward the school, someone yelled his name. He turned toward the voice and his mood - which wasn't that bright in the first place - was brought down excessively.

< >"James," Severus said coldly in greeting as James stopped in front of him.

< >"Severus," James replied with the same coldness.

< >"What do you want?"

< >"What were you doing in Hagrid's hut?" James demanded instantly.

< >Severus glared at him. "I don't see how it's any of your business."

< >"It is my business, Severus; Hagrid's my friend."

< >"Really, James, if you must know, Hagrid brought me breakfast. I missed it and he invited me in," Severus said, exasperated. He sighed. "Are you satisfied? Or are you devastated that your friend invited me in?" Severus pushed past James and hurried into the castle, leaving James behind to stare at his back.

< >He was hurrying down an empty corridor more than ten minutes later when he heard soft crying and he stopped. "Hello?" Severus called, squinting his eyes in the darkness, trying to get them to adjust.

< >There was a pause in the crying and sniffling. "Severus?" someone called.

< >"Samantha?" Severus asked, his voice failing him. He looked around a turn and there was lovely Samantha - sitting against the wall, face buried in her hands. She raised her head to look at him, her eyes red from crying.

< >"Oh, Severus!" she wailed, burying her face in her hands again.

< >"Samantha?" Severus asked again, stunned.

< >She didn't answer; just kept sobbing.

< >Severus debated with himself - though he knew it was stupid - about what he should do. Finally, he decided to speak. "Samantha, what's wrong? What happened?" he asked shrilly, startling himself at the sound of his worried voice.

< >"No, no, no," Samantha said softly through her hands, oblivious to him, talking to herself. "It's impossible. Why did it have to happen to me?" She looked up at Severus, trembling.

< >"What?" Severus demanded, suddenly frustrated.

< >"Why did my parents have to die?" Samantha nearly shrieked. "Haven't you heard? Or are you just taunting me because your parents are still alive?" Her hands were in tight fists and her knuckles were white.

< >Severus stared at her, stunned. "W - w - what?" he said in a high voice, not about to correct the fact that his father was dead.

< >Samantha turned her head away and shook her head indigantly.

< >"Oh, mother of . . ." Severus kneeled beside her and stared at the cheek facing him. "Samantha . . . oh, God . . . I didn't know . . . I was outside all morning. I am such an idiot!"

< >Samantha looked back at him and closed her eyes. "No, no you're not."

< >"Yes, I am!" Severus said miserably. "I should be comforting you - not the other way around!" He grabbed his wiry hair angrily. Stupid, stupid, stupid, he whispered harshly to himself. Idiot! Her parents are dead and she is comforting you!

< >Samantha's closed eyes leaked with tears and she leaned against his chest, surprising him, but he didn't protest. He felt his heart beating against hers as she sobbed quietly.

< >Slowly, Severus put his arms around Samantha's shaking body and she gripped his arm with her hands, unable to let go. Her eyes were squeezed tight, trying desperately not to let any tears spill, but her strength gave out on her, and her face was suddenly flooded with tears again.

< >"Severus," she whispered softly after a few minutes of silence.

< >"Yes, Samantha?" Severus asked tenderly, looking down at her sweet face.

< >"Stay with me?"

< >"Always and forever, Samantha," Severus whispered into her ear. He leaned down after a moment and kissed her forehead, stroking her soft hair, wishing he could see her beautiful eyes, no matter how horribly tear-stricken they were, just to see her eyes looking into his . . .

< >They stayed in their positions for nearly three hours. Severus's knees ached horribly, but he didn't complain or shift around, even though his dear Samantha had fallen asleep in his arms.

< >After the three approximate hours - there was no clock in the corridor, but Severus was just estimating - Professor McGonagall came around the corner, looking sour.

< >"Mr. Sna - " Her voice faltered instantly when she saw Samantha in Severus's arms. "Oh, dear . . ." She slowly turned back to Severus. "Is she all right?" the professor asked slowly, looking down at Samantha again.

< >"Of course," Severus sneered, surprising himself. "Her parents have just died, but she is just fine." He shook his head in disgust, disregarding his mantra of never speaking back to a teacher. "What happened?" he demanded after a moment. "What happened to David and Florence?"

< >"You - you knew them?" McGonagall faltered.

< >"Yes," Severus said, struggling hard not to sneer again. "I've known Samantha - and her parents . . . nearly all my life . . ." He looked back down at Samantha, still in his arms.

< >McGonagall gulped. "You wanted to know what happened - " Severus snapped his head up - "and I will tell you, since you are seemingly telling me that you two," she gestured to Samantha, "are nearly like family."

< >Severus looked down again, embarrassed. Does Samantha agree? he wondered.

< >"It - I suppose you've heard of Lord Voldemort?" McGonagall continued when Severus nodded dimly. "He is growing, fast, and he's . . ." She gulped. "He's killing every one who goes against him."

< >"Did - ?"

< >"No, they were . . . they were just in the wrong place at the wrong time, sadly," McGonagall replied, somewhat stiffly. "He went on a rampage two days ago - not even half of the bodies have been found . . ."

< >"Will he rise even farther?"

< >"Yes, I believe so, Mr. Snape."

< >"He will kill more?"

< >"Yes, again, it is believed."

< >"Leave us, then, professor." Severus looked up, a menacing glint in his eyes. "I will take her to her common room when she awakes. Go, please, just go." He looked down, not wanting to look McGonagall in the eye again.

< >The professor stayed silent for a moment, then slowly walked away down the corridor without a verbal answer, but Severus knew she had consented. He listened until he could no longer hear her footsteps and turned back to Samantha.

< >"Samantha," he whispered softly, nudging her gently.

< >She groaned softly, protesting her awakening.

< >"Samantha," he said more urgently.

< >"Hmm?" Samantha asked, her eyes fluttering open to look at him.
She stared. "How long - ?"

< >"I think about three hours," Severus replied quietly.

< >Samantha sat up, dazed, and looked back at him, seeing he was still on his knees. "Oh, Severus," she breathed in amazement, staring at him. "I bet you can't even walk, let alone stand up."

< >Severus shook his head, though he knew she was probably right. He pulled his legs out from under him, his knees aching. He grimaced as he straightened his legs out in front of him.

< >Samantha stood up shakily, putting a hand on the wall to steady herself. Her knees shook violently, but she stayed on her feet; barely, though.

< >Severus took the last of his strength and pulled himself to his feet, his whole body aching - muscles cramped in places he didn't know could ache. "Let's get you to your common room," he said softly, taking Samantha's elbow.

< >He lead her all the way to the Ravenclaw common room entrance. He turned to her and asked, concerned, "Are you sure you can make it? All the way to your dormitory, I mean?"

< >Samantha opened her mouth to speak, but her shaking knees gave way, and tears formed in her eyes again, a sign of impeccable grief. She looked up at him from the ground, her blue eyes shimmering in the torch light. "Why? Oh, why, Severus?" she sobbed. "They weren't even saying or doing anything to him - they never did! Oh, why?"

< >Severus crouched in front of her and took her hands in his, looking her in the eye. "I don't know, Samantha, I really don't know. I am very sorry, for your loss, you know that, don't you?"

< >Samantha gulped and nodded. "Yes, yes, of course I do. You always told me they were like family to you." She pulled out a handkerchief and wiped her running nose, dabbing blindly at her flowing tears.

...........

Cont.....

< >Severus turned toward the Ravenclaw entrance and rapped harshly; someone was bound to hear it, he knew. And, sure enough, a Ravenclaw pushed through the entryway, and stared at him.

< >Severus helped Samantha to her feet. "Let me pass," he ordered in a low, menacing tone. His eyes flickered with malice at the boy, making a meaningful impression on the boy that he wanted in.

< >The first year kept staring. "B - but . . . but you're a Slytherin!" he nearly cried.

< >Suddenly, loud, angry shouts rang out behind the boy and he was shoved away from the entry. A seventh year prefect took his place, glaring hard at Severus, looking at him as if he was the scum of the earth.

< >"Let me pass," Severus repeated in the same tone he had used with the boy.

< >The seventh year laughed scornfully. "Hardly, you imbecile! Why would I let you, a Slytherin, into my common room?" he demanded, his voice abruptly but not unjustly cold as he glared at Severus sanctimoniously.

>"First of all, this is not your common room, this is the Ravenclaw common room, if you've forgotten. Second of all, this is the girl who I have known much longer than you ever will. And finally, last, but not least, let me pass!" Severus hissed, glancing at Samantha who was too upset too speak at the moment.

< >"Give her to me," the seventh year said cautiously.

< >"Hardly, yourself! I brought her here on Professor McGonagall's orders and I will not leave until I know she is safely in her dormitory!" Severus said angrily; his lying about the professor's alleged orders was only obvious to himself and Samantha. That is, if Samantha was even listening anymore - or even able to listen, for that matter, over the noise of her sobbing.

< >"You, nor any other boy is allowed in a girl's dormitory!" The Ravenclaw was appalled.

< >"And I don't give a rat's ass!" Severus said fiercely. "Let me pass or I will go straight to Professor Dumbledore himself! And there will be hell to pay then." His last words were just above a whisper, but just as meaningful as everything else.

< >The Ravenclaw boy's confidence faltered when he heard and took in the threat. He coughed and turned to his fellow Ravenclaws. "Please move away for your fellow Ravenclaw . . . and friend," he said in a loud voice, turning back to Severus.

< >Severus couldn't hold Samantha very well anymore and, without warning to any of them - even Severus himself, he nearly dropped her. "Help me," he said sharply to the prefect as he carefully pulled Samantha into his arms so he could carry her. His muscles felt like they were literally screaming and he wanted to scream, as well, but he ignored the pain as best he could, busying himself with Samantha.

< >Reluctantly, the boy helped Severus in, looking quite repulsed and disgusted at even the thought - and action - of touching a Slytherin. Severus almost told him this wasn't a time for politics - or the hatred everyone had toward Slytherin, but held himself back for Samantha's sake.

< >The prefect took his hands away as soon as Severus had made it
through the entrance and pointed silently toward a corridor that must have led to Samantha's dormitory.

< >All the common room inhabitants' faces showed a mixture of astonishment and hatred. Their eyes glowed angrily at the thought of a Slytherin stepping into their common room.

< >Severus walked, ignoring them and alone, still holding Samantha in his arms, of course. She seemed oblivious to everything and everyone; or asleep, he guessed, again. Exhaustion had overcome her.

< >He nudged open the dormitory door with his foot and pushed through. He found Samantha's ruby encrusted chest immediately - it was one of a kind - and laid her in the bed that it lay at the foot of. He then pulled the covers over her, dragging them up to her chin protectively.

< >Samantha's eyes slowly opened, feeling this warmth. She looked around, startled, then turned her head toward Severus. Her eyes widened in surprise. "Why - how - when - ?" she asked, blinking.

< >"Shh," Severus whispered, bringing a finger to his lips. "I brought
you in here just now. The how part was difficult, but I finally made it through. I will say, though, that your fellow Ravenclaws will be happy to see me go." He chuckled softly.

< >Samantha smiled weakly. She reached out and touched his hand, intertwining their fingers. "You did that - just for me?"

< >Severus nodded slowly, averting his eyes from hers. He wanted to express his love for her, but he couldn't. He looked back at her finally and gripped her hand gently but firmly. "I . . . I don't know what to say to you," he whispered hoarsely.

< >Samantha closed her eyes and her arm fell limp, falling slowly - because of Severus's grasping hand - next to her side. "You have done so much for me, Severus . . . How could I ever repay you?"

< >"Sleep," Severus replied quietly, slowly pulling his hand away, so he could stroke her hair. "If you just sleep, that will be all I need from you, dear Samantha." He stood up, kissed her hand, and before he left whispered, "Sleep, my love. Sleep."

< >Severus then hurried out of the dormitory and down the corridor, fearing an answer from Samantha, no matter what it might be.

< >The Ravenclaws were all still in the common room, so quiet that a feather could have fallen and it would have sounded like an explosion when it touched the floor. They all glared at his back as he crawled quickly out of their precious common room.

< >Severus, finally out, hurried to his own common room. He was greeted by applause and excited whispers that erupted as soon as he walked in.

< >Dorian ran up to him and turned to everyone. "My best friend - made it into the Ravenclaw common room! A first in Hogwarts history! And into a girls' dormitory, no less!"

< >Severus whirled around, seized short Dorian by the robes, and threw him against the nearest wall, glaring hard into his eyes.

< >The common room hushed immediately, startled.

< >"You are a fool, Dorian," Severus hissed quietly, but the whole common room heard it because of their silence, listening attentively. "You are an damned, idiotic fool, Dorian! My real best friend is Samantha Halloway, a girl I have known for years ! And her parents were just killed, Dorian. By Lord Voldemort! One of the most evil or soon to be most evil wizards that has ever graced the face of this earth! And all you can say is I ‘made into the Ravenclaw common room!’ Who gives a flying - " Dorian yelped in pain as Severus dug his sharp nails into Dorian’s neck.

< >"Severus!" he cried.

< >"Samantha was crying in my arms for hours this morning!" Severus continued severely, not letting Dorian go just yet. "I was not there for her when she needed me, though, Dorian, in the beginning! All of you were, though! But you did not come to her comfort, did you?" he accused angrily. "And who cares that she is a Ravenclaw? How many of you will wish that a Gryffindor or that a Hufflepuff were there for you when your parents die?" Severus yelled at the common room, dropping Dorian who crumpled in a heap on the floor.

< >Severus looked down at him and spit on him. "You disgust me. I helped her all the way to her common room on legs that had not moved position in three hours, carried through her common room, past all of the Ravenclaws, and into her room, to lay her on her bed - for her protection!

< >"Samantha is the only friend I truly know and I will not - do your hear me? - I will not hand her off to some prefect, even if he was a Ravenclaw and I am not - because I could not and cannot! I knew her parents - the only ones she had in this world who are now dead! Lying in pieces on a street! Dead! Does that ring a bell? Death?" he demanded of the room. "How many of you will be crying and sobbing in your beds in grief of your parents, or your sister, or your brother, or your aunts and
uncles and cousins in a few years, because Voldemort killed them?"

< >The silent common room stared at Severus in terrible realization and shock at his defiance. The Slytherins looked around at themselves, pondering whose family would be the next to go, but were at immediate attention when Severus spoke again.

< >"And mark my words, all of you, when the time comes for your own death, all of you will regret this. All of it. All of you." With that, Severus swept to his dormitory, slamming the door behind him.

Check out what will happen next....

Cont...

< >He did not come out for lunch, nor did he even think of leaving for dinner. Severus had drawn the curtains around his bed once again and spent his time staring into space. He knew he should have been studying, but he really didn't care.

< >Severus heard Dorian and the other sixth year boys come in after dinner, suddenly lowering their loud voices, when they saw Severus was in the room, or, at least, figured he still was.

< >When morning came, Severus was first up. He hurried down to the Great Hall after he had dressed, ate quickly before many students arrived, then headed to the library, wanting to find a quiet, reserved place for studying.

< >He had been working for nearly an hour, when someone passing by stopped next to him. Severus looked up, his eyes immediately darkening. "What do you want?" he sneered, looking back down at his papers.

< >James Potter shifted from one foot to the other uncomfortably. "I - I just wanted to say . . ." Severus looked up, ready to come back with a sarcastic remark. "I just wanted to say what you did - it was really decent of you," James finished defiantly.

< >Severus stared at him, then, realizing what James was about to say, turned back to his work. "I suppose the whole school knows if you know," he replied in a hard tone.

< >James sat down in front of Severus, making him look up. "What do you mean?" he demanded, narrowing his eyes at Severus.

< >"What do you think I mean?" Severus sneered.

< >"I just came here - " James started to say, his voice rising.

< >"To say that what I did was really decent. Yeah, I know. I'm not exactly deaf, am I?" Severus demanded angrily through gritted teeth. "I heard you perfectly, James Potter."

< >James's eyes stayed narrowed. "If you must know - your whole house was telling everyone at lunch and at dinner, for those who missed the tale. Are you telling me what they said wasn't true - "

< >"Am I supposed to know what they said is true or not when I was not even there?" Severus hissed, slamming his quill down. "I wasn't there - was I? I'm sure at least half of them said I'm crazy - that's why I was in bed all day. Ha! I stayed there because I did not want to talk to any idiots yesterday or today! But today has already been ruined and it's barely even started!"

< >"They said that you carried that girl - Samantha Halloway - all the way to the common room, yelled at one of the prefects, and walked straight in. You then carried her to her room and you were there for a while, comforting her," James said, ignoring Severus's last, cruel comments.

< >"I helped her to her common room door, then carried her to her room when she started crying again, even though my legs had been bent in the same direction for three hours," Severus said, "though that is clearly besides the point. And how in hell did my house know about - ?"

< >James waved his hand impatiently. "The Ravenclaws, of course. They included their own stories. Stories," he emphasized.

< >Severus opened his mouth, then shut it. "No, I'm not saying anymore. It's my personal business and for one thing, what will the Gryffindors think when they find out you spoke to me in an actual conversation?" he demanded. "They'll condemn you for life!" Severus laughed shortly and looked back at his work. "I'm busy," he said to James in a hard voice after a moment of silence, but no movement.

< >James hesitated for a moment, then got up, and turned to leave.

< >"James," Severus said suddenly, his voice low. He did not look up, but his mind was focused on the exiting boy.

< >James turned around slowly. "Severus," he replied, unnerved by the odd show of reserve in Severus.

< >"You're lucky, you know," Severus said quietly. "Damn lucky . . ."

< >"Lucky? For what?" James demanded.

< >Severus sighed in hesitation. "You have Lily," he replied softly.

< >"And you have Samantha, Severus," James said quietly, then walked away.
~

< >At lunch time later that day, even though it was Sunday, the Great Hall was crowded with people on study breaks.

< >Whispering had erupted once again when Severus had walked in, but he gave a glaring glance around the room, and it had returned to semi-normal talk, with staring, though, of course. Everyone was worried he was going to beat them up like he supposedly did to Dorian.

< >Suddenly, near the end of lunch, after a few people had sauntered out, not looking forward to getting back to their studies, two lonely owls swooped into the Great Hall. The whole room went silent because they knew what this probably meant - a death.

< >One headed to Dumbledore and the other - the other was headed toward Severus. The owl headed toward Dumbledore dropped it in his lap and Severus's letter was dropped right into his hands.

< >Severus tore open the letter and a long, gold chain with a small, roughly cut amethyst on it fell out onto the table with a clatter. He jumped up, making the chair he was sitting in crash onto the floor behind him.

< >Dumbledore jumped up from his own seat, but couldn't move any farther. Everyone was staring at Severus, who was himself staring open-mouthed at the necklace in pure horror.

< >"No," he whispered softly. "No, no, no!" He turned his head to stare at Dumbledore who nodded solemnly and looked truly sorry. "NO!" Severus shrieked, backing up and falling onto the floor, scrambling backwards desperately to get away from the necklace.

< >Though he desperately tried to back away, kicking his legs out hysterically, he could barely move out of his place. Out of the corner of his eye, Severus saw James leap to his feet, but he was not paying attention to anyone at that moment, just staring at the stone and chain in absolute terror.

< >The necklace was on the edge of the table and after a few silent moments, teetered off the table onto the floor, a few inches from Severus's feet. The clang of it hitting the floor echoed through the Great Hall.

< >Severus screamed.

~

Watch out for the ending....

.......

< >Someone had taken him back to his room - Dorian, with the help of James, probably, Severus figured when he woke up. Everyone had probably stared at him, even Sirius, Remus, Peter, and Lily.

< >Oh, why? Samantha asked why and now I am asking - why? Severus screamed to no one in his head. He put his hands on his ears, trying to block out the pain he felt inside him, but it wouldn't go away, and he flopped back on the bed, tears streaming down his cheeks.

< >My poor mother . . . how long did she live? How long did she know she was going to die? How long was her pain? How had she held herself when she knew she was dying? Severus had so many questions, with no answers at all, and it nearly killed him.

< >His father had died when he was six and now, at age sixteen, ten years later, his mother was dead too. He had no brothers or sisters, or did he have relatives that he knew of; he was all alone in the world, except for the fact he had Samantha.

< >Severus decided to go talk with Hagrid again, despite repeatedly telling himself it was foolish; Hagrid couldn’t help. Alas, he left the common room after everyone had gone to bed, slipping through the damp dungeons and drafty corridors, carefully avoiding Argus Filch and his cat.

< >He rapped on the door of the hut, whispering urgently, "Hagrid? Hagrid!"

< >"W - what?" Hagrid asked sleepily, coming to the door, and opening it. He stared at Severus in surprise. "Severus! What are yeh doin' 'ere?" Hagrid nearly cried, suddenly wide awake.

< >Severus looked down and didn't answer. He realized that his hands were shaking violently and clasped them together, trying to force them to stop.

< >"Eh, well, c'mon in," Hagrid said uncertainly, ushering him in.

< >"I heard about yer mum," Hagrid said delicately, handing Severus a cup of tea. "Er, I know yeh don't like it, but it's all I got." He looked extremely apologetic.

< >"No, no - it's fine. Thank you." Severus took a small sip of tea which felt like heaven in itself to his dry mouth. He looked slowly up at Hagrid, his eyes glistening. "So," he said slowly, "you heard about Mother?"

< >Hagrid shifted his weight uncomfortably. "Yeah," he replied finally, quietly, somberly, carefully . . .

< >Severus shook his head in grief. "I had just 'preached,' if you will, to my house about their selfishness and what they would be feeling if they're parents or family died by the hand of Voldemort - " Hagrid absolutely shuddered at the name, he saw, but kept going, " - and it happened to me." Severus stared down at his cup. A tear fell into it, rippling the dark liquid.

< >Hagrid slowly pulled an envelope out of his jacket and set it in front of Severus, who stared. "Now, I - I'm not the firs' one to admit, Severus," Hagrid began, making Severus look up at him, "that I don't like Slytherins and people like them - and I'm sure damn well not going to be the last one, either, you know that. But, I have to say to that yer sure as hell one of the most noble and courageous young men I've met in my entire lifetime. Yer a good man, Severus, yeh really are."

< >Severus left Hagrid's hut at dawn; he had slept on the floor, Fang curled up next to him. He hadn't wanted to go back to the castle that night - it was too risky, anyway, Hagrid had realized.

< >He walked swiftly across the grounds, the opened letter clutched in his hand protectively. Severus still hadn't read the enclosed, though, and preferred to do it in private. He hurried into the castle, immediately confronted by Professor Dumbledore.

< >"Professor Dumbledore?" Severus asked dimly, surprised.

< >"Severus, why don't you come to my office? We can talk."

< >The professor reached out to take Severus's arm, but Severus whirled away. "With all due respect, sir, I'd rather not," he said, his eyes narrowing. He hated "talking" to Dumbledore - Dumbledore did all the talking while the student listened, nodded, and would agree, whether or not they did. Severus loathed that aspect.

< >Professor Dumbledore stared at him, surprised. . . . Yet, Severus saw by the look in the old man's eyes, he was really not, in a way. It was as if Professor Dumbledore had heard this kind of rejection at least once before. He nodded finally. "Well, you'd better be on your way then, Mr. Snape."

< >"Yes, sir," Severus replied, hurrying away.

< >Severus was walking toward the entrance to his common room, when he was ambushed by a blur of brown hair. Whoever it was threw their arms around his neck, sobbing.

< >"Samantha!" he yelped, nearly falling backwards, realizing who it was.

< >"Oh, Severus! I just heard!" Samantha wailed, still hugging him.

< >Severus hugged her back tightly, his own tears starting to fall. "They were together, weren't they?" he whispered hoarsely, knowing the answer as soon as he had asked the question.

< >Samantha cried on his shoulder. "Why us, Severus?" she demanded then . . . laughed sarcastically. "Of course you don't know - I don't know and I'm supposed to know everything! Oh, God, Severus, I wish I was with my parents!" She broke into tears again.

< >Severus hugged her more tightly, unsure of what to say. He put his head on her shoulder, tears falling onto her, but she didn't seem to mind or care. She stroked his hair gently, surprising him.

< >"A storm is coming, you know," Samantha whispered quietly into Severus’ ear, wiping her nose with her hand and sniffing. "I can feel it. And it's definitely coming. But, the question isn't whether it's coming or not, the question is, is it good . . . or is it evil?"

< >"We'll only know when it comes," Severus replied softly and hugged her again.
~

< >Sure enough, Samantha was right. The castle was being pelted by rain and hail and wind in less than an hour later after that, actually.

< >The corridors were freezing, fireplaces were lit with roaring fires, but those were only in the common rooms. The classrooms were freezing, especially Potions and the astronomy tower.

< >No one spoke of the deaths, it was becoming all too real to their innocent minds. Another student, in Gryffindor this time, had found out that his sister and father had died. They'd been the last bodies to be found in the wreckage - and the poor boy was devastated. He stayed in his bed, not wanting to talk to anyone.

< >Once all of his classes were over, Severus retreated to his common room where he studied until dinner. Then he dragged his miserable self down to the Great Hall at dinner and starting eating, suddenly ravenous. He was in a position where he could see the doors of the Great Hall if he looked straight in front of him. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a girl with long brown hair run by it, not even glancing inside, but he knew who it was.

< >Severus jumped to his feet and the room fell silent almost instantly. It was a good thing, too - perhaps in the most morbid sense of the words - because then no one would have heard the front doors slam shut . . . or the muffled, painful scream that followed it a few seconds later.

< >"Samantha!" Severus shouted, scrambling clear over the loaded table, sendind dishes and glasses shattering to the floor. In seconds he was running out the Great Hall doors. He slammed into the walls as he ran, deafening shouts of surprise and fear behind him.

< >He soon heard loud footsteps following him quickly, but he ignored them, and focused on nothing but that of what was in front of him. Severus threw open the front door and stopped dead at the sight not seventy feet in front of him. He couldn't move.

< >Samantha lay twisted on the ground below, soaked by the rain and bloodied by the evil deed. A silver, ruby encrusted dagger was sliding slowly from her delicate hand.

< >Severus suddenly felt power come back to his legs and he tore down to Samantha, slipping and sliding in the mud and dark. He fell onto his knees next to her, staring at her in shock and fear.

.......

< >Samantha was breathing harshly as the blood drained quickly from her veins. She was pale as a ghost, gazing up at the sky with a blank expression, ignoring the rainwater splashing into her still beautiful eyes. Her grip on the handle of the blade was lost and the dagger slid into a thin stream of rain water, gliding away slowly, as if wanting to leave an even more lasting impression on Severus than it already had.

< >She did this to herself, Severus knew with sudden alarm, gulping down a scream.

< >There were gasps of horror behind him as the rest of the school joined him in the rain.

< >"No, no, Samantha!" Severus suddenly yelled in anguish, slamming his fist down in the mud. He crawled around to her and brought her limp head into his lap. "No, Samantha! No! Don't leave me! Not here! Not now!" he cried, tears streaming down his cheeks.

< >Samantha looked into his eyes, but didn't say anything. She looked . . . happy.

< >"No, don't do that! Don't look at me like that! I love you, Samantha!" Severus shrieked, burying his face in his hands. "Don't you understand? Isn't it clear? Why? Oh, why do I have to lose so many people? It's not fair! My father, my mother, and - and now you - my only reason for not taking my own life!"

< >Samantha started crying - Severus didn't know if it was the pain or realization. "Oh, Severus," she said, her voice choking on the blood that was swirling and coming up through her throat. "Oh, Severus, I knew! I know, but . . . but my life was over the second Voldemort was conceived! Before I was even born! His destiny was to kill my parents and mine is to be with my parents and - "

< >"And my destiny was to be with you!" Severus yelled back at her, suddenly angry through his miserably pain. His shoulders shook as tears began to overwhelm him.

< >"I love you, too, Severus," Samantha choked through tears, her pale, feeble body shaking horribly. "But I can't go on. Not without my family - my parents, I mean."

< >"My mother died, you know!" Severus cried accusingly. "I - I . . . how do you think I can go on without you?" He cried harder, not wanting to believe the truth which lay right in front of his very eyes in its shocking, terrible reality.

< >Samantha managed a weak smile and stared up at him, eyes dipped in ferocious ocean water. He felt his angel, his love leaving him, escaping the murky depths of the terrible sea. "What did I ask you once?" she asked, her voice trembling as tears rolled silently away from her eyes and joined the rain puddles surrounding them.

< >Severus stared at her, paralyzed and confused.

< >"I asked you," she continued, taking in a shaky breath, "to stay with me."

< >"And I . . ." Severus gulped back a sob. "I said 'always and forever.' I'd be always with you . . . forever . . . and ever . . . and always . . ." He brushed away the tears that came down even faster from his eyes.

< >Samantha reached up to him and grasped his hand. "Always and forever, Severus, always and forever," she whispered hoarsely, smiling as best she could, despite the pain. "I will always be with you . . . forever."

< >Severus leaned down and kissed her deeply, never wanting to let go - he couldn't, he knew. He'd never let go. Never. "Always and forever, my love," he whispered, his voice whimpering with anguish. "Always and forever."

< >The two lovers were oblivious to the people surrounding them. Their screams, their crying, their stares of terror, their whimpers of emotional distress all mixed together came upon deaf ears. It was just the two of them in the bleak of the dark stormy night, alone, and together . . . always and forever in their hearts.

< >Samantha died in Severus's arms that stormy night, leaving a lonely, angry man behind in grief of his lost life. He knew he would never again regain that life and he knew he never wanted it back because he knew he would lose it again if he ever did.

~

....

< >Severus Snape closed his eyes, remembering his last moments with Samantha. The moments felt like they had occurred only the day before, and, in a way, they had. For him, anyway, though it had been many, many years. . . .

< >"Sir?" a sixth year named Harry Potter asked softly. His voice was uncertain, not wanting to disturb his Potions professor.

< >Severus opened his eyes and looked at Harry. He smiled weakly.

< >"Why did you tell me this?" Harry asked shakily, nervous.

< >Severus sighed. "I have never repeated my story to anyone since that day. It was the love that shattered me into what I am or was today, Harry. I figured you needed an apology from me."

< >"Sir, I - I don't understand - "

< >"You shouldn't. The love of your life, your only reason for getting up in the morning and going to sleep in the evening, didn't die in your arms when you were only sixteen, did she?" Severus asked quietly. "But, same as you, your parents died at the hand of Voldemort, and I thought you should know."

< >"Why did you think I should know, though, sir?" Harry asked, speaking grimly. "I have thought you always loathed me."

< >Severus smiled weakly, shaking his head. "Never, Potter. Never have I truly hated you. I gave you a hard time . . . well, because I didn’t want you to have time to think of your parents."

< >Harry looked to the floor, embarrassed and morose by this, and Severus sighed deeply. "I've lived here at Hogwarts almost my whole life, Mr. Potter. That's over twenty years almost, if you'll believe that. I never left here after my seventh year, the year you are in now. I trained, studied, and worked here to become the professor I am today. Do you know why I was so interested in the Dark Arts? Because I wanted to kill Voldemort so much that I nearly went insane - I wanted revenge and I was utterly bloodthirsty about it . . . I even joined his cult during my early teaching years to get closer to him."

< >"I understand that, professor, but . . . Why?" Harry asked softly, looking up. "Why didn't you leave here? Why didn't you get away from this place if you hurt so much?"

< >Severus's eyes glistened with tears. "Because I made a promise, Harry, I made a promise."

< >Harry was about to reply, confused once again, when a pale transparent girl abrupty stepped out of the shadows behind his professor. She put a frail hand on Severus's shoulder and Severus put his own hand on hers, seeming as if her hand was really there.

< >"I made a promise, Harry," Severus repeated softly, smiling, truly happy for one of the first times in nearly twenty years. "I promised to stay with my dear Samantha. Always and forever. And I plan to stick with that promise. Always and forever . . ."

- fin -

So who did write it?

I don't know who write this fanfic... but its really an interesting story of Snape, right?

It's a bit psycho, but you really should credit the writer...