Great, this thread just reminded me of how much I hate subway, and Jared.
I was just starting to give some points back to subway, since I hadn't seen that ugly Hobgoblin Jared for a while. But now they started using him again, and he's saying shit like -
"Ohh, a big mac has 36grams of fat (no shit, a mcdonalds hamburger, fatty? Too hell you say!) , but this shitty subway sandwich that is primarily stuffed with day old lettuce and fourth rate mayonaise has only 6. Nevermind the that we totally disregaurd the fact that if you put all the toppings and condoments on the sandwich it becomes just as fattening, or more so if you get a foot long, than a big mac. We don't really care about your health, in fact, this Jared guy actually never was fat, he's just some ugly guy we found one night sleeping at a bus stop who looks like he could, at one time, have had a fat face, so we picked him and told him to eat our falick shaped sandwiches and say he used to be this fat guy we took a picture of one time at a park who was eating a hamburger. They were both wearing glasses so it works like a charm, and suckers actually believe that our sandwiches are low in fat, and taste good, which of course is a complete lie. If you get our sandwiches that ARE low in fat, they taste like a toilet water and napkins, but if you get our sandwiches that taste good, they are more fattening then the burgers we condemn. Yeah, we're great"
Another damn thing I hate is when they compare their sandwiches with a big mac or some other burger. They put their sandwich on a nice colorful tray, and it's made neatly and it's being held by a nice, inoffensive young white man with a smile on his face. Then when they show the big mac they put it together like it was some pile of shit. The patties are falling out of the bun, and there's urine like grease dripping out of the wrapper, and the bun is all smashed and it's being held by a dirty looking rapist like fellow who has a sneer on his face like he just raped your mother, and then they dim the color to make it look bland and grey. Half the time when I eat at subway there's a god damned wristwatch or eyeball in my sandwich, and it looks like they dropped it on the floor about 7 times and had rats crap all over it.
BAH! Look what this thread has done.