Have you ever been arrested?

Yeah well I almost got shot because I dropped a penny on the sidewalk

I was beaten down an raped because my shoelace was untied

No way, I was jumped and then raped because I had a hole in my shirt

Wow, they knocked me unconscious and gang banged me because I didnt look both ways before I crossed the street

I got tied up and gang banged because I said yo.

They shot and killed my family because I stepped in gum

They shot my dog because I slammed the door

They burned my house down because I forgot to bring my gym shorts

They stole my sandwhich because I forgot to wash my feet

I was given a public linching because I didnt use dental floss

I got raped by a woman because I ate a tic tac

I was sodomized with a cactus because I didnt shave on thursday

Whoa I was beaten with a pineapple because I saw you step in gum

Really, they ripped out my kidneys because I picked up that penny you dropped

No way, they beat me with a golf club because I noticed that your shoelace was untied

Thats weird because, They choked me with wet noodles because I saw the hole in your shirt

Well they put make up on me and then beat me with a tire iron because I saw you not looking both ways when crossing the street

Guess what they burned off my eyebrows because I heard you say yo

They strangled me with a sock because you didnt finish your turkey sandwhich

I was slapped with used condoms because I watched you eat a tic tac