tolkien was a funny guy lol

Tolkien Quotes

"I think if a jinn came and gave me a wish -- what would you really like? -- I should reply: Nothing. Go away!"

"I have done some touches to my nonsense fairy language...it does seem such a mad hobby!"

"I am in fact a Hobbit, in all but size...I like gardens, trees...I smoke a pipe, and like good plain food (unregrigerated), but detest French cooking..."

"My friends at school...called me John, or occasionally...J.R2."

"When is Vol. III [Return of the King] likely now to appear? I shall be murdered if something does not happen soon."

"To ask if the Orcs 'are' Communists is to me as sensible as asking if Communists are Orcs."

"Do you think Shelob is a good name for a monstrous spider creature?...it seems to be quite noisome..."

"I have always found cricket a bore: chiefly, though, because I was not good at it."

"Remember your guardian angel. Not a plump lady with swan-wings!"

"I met the Lúthien Tinúviel of my own personal 'romance' with her long dark hair, fair face and starry eyes, and beautiful voice..."

"I do not dislike spiders particulary, and have no urge to kill them. I usually rescue those whom I find in the bath!"

😂 Funny haha.

Originally posted by sauron
"To ask if the Orcs 'are' Communists is to me as sensible as asking if Communists are Orcs."

"I have always found cricket a bore: chiefly, though, because I was not good at it."

"I met the Lúthien Tinúviel of my own personal 'romance' with her long dark hair, fair face and starry eyes, and beautiful voice..."

"I do not dislike spiders particulary, and have no urge to kill them. I usually rescue those whom I find in the bath!"

1. LOL 😆

2. ROFLMAO 😂

3. In fact on his gravestone he has written "Beren" under his name and his wife has "Lúthien" 🙂

4. lol 😛 cute... I thought he had arachnophobia because of that spider in south africa when he was some years old 😛

And what he said to CS Lewis when they were in the Inklings,

"I warn you, if you bore me, I shall take my revenge."

😄

well apparently he doesnt 😛 he saved them 😄

i can remember when i fought shelob with sting (shelob being huge house spider and sting being a rather large needle) hard battle...but i won......just

Originally posted by sauron
i can remember when i fought shelob with sting (shelob being huge house spider and sting being a rather large needle) hard battle...but i won......just

Oh, that's funny, sauron 😛

Originally posted by sauron
"To ask if the Orcs 'are' Communists is to me as sensible as asking if Communists are Orcs."

😆 😂 🤣 😂 😆

funny it was true! remember i told you all in the tig party

I haven't been to the tig party in a while, so no.

it was before it hit one hunred pages lol so it was a looong time ago

😂 then i am sure i did not read it 😛

Oh well I don't remember it haha. Yeah, I stopped looking at the tig party thread after it hit 200 haha. Too many pages to read. I stop by some times though.

yea its the biggest thread ever 😛

Most definately. It's possibly the biggest thread on this forum 😛 How many pages is it now? 600? 700? haha.

Oops, sorry, we're getting way off topic.

it is 10054 last time i checked

Tolkien's witty humor could also be proven by the hilarious quotes in The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings books. 😄 😆

Some examples: These crack me up everytime I read them:

1) This is when Aragorn, Gimli, and Gandalf discover Merry and Pippin and start asking them lots of questions (in The Two Towers) "One thing you have not found in your hunting, and that's brighter wits"- that's Pippin.

2) "You don't know your danger, Theoden, These hobbits will sit on the dge of ruin and discuss the pleasures of the table, or the small doings of their fathers, grandfathers, and great-grandfathers and remoter cousins to the ninth degree, if you encourage them with undue patience."-Gandalf

3)"Are we riding far tonight, Gandalf? I don't know how you feel with a small rag-tag dangling behind you; but the rag-tag is tired and will be glad to stop dangling and lie down."- Merry

4)Merry: Do not meddle in the affairs of Wizards, for they are subtle and quick to anger
Pippin: But our whole life for months has been one long meddling in the affairs of Wizards!

5)Pippin: All right! . . . I know I can't have it, with old Gandalf sitting on it, like a hen on an egg. But it doesn't help much to get no more from you than a you-can't-have-it so go-to-sleep!
Merry: Well, what else could I say? I'm sorry, Pippin, but you really must wait until the morning. I'll be as curious as you like after breakfast, and I'll help in anyway I can at wizard-wheedling. But I can't keep awake any longer. If I yawn any more, I shall split at the ears. Good night!

6: Sam: Not a bird!
Gollum: No, no birds. Nice birds! No birds here. There are snakeses, wormses, things in the pools. Lots of things, lots of nasty things. No birds,

7) Sam: What's the need to sniff? The stink nearly knocks me down with my nose held. You stink, and the master stinks; the whole place stinks.
Gollum: Yes, yes, and Sam stinks!!

😆 Sam has a lot of hilarious one-liners in the book and his funny debates with Gollum never fail to crack me up everytime. 😆

Originally posted by shadowy_blue
"One thing you have not found in your hunting, and that's brighter wits"

"You don't know your danger, Theoden, These hobbits will sit on the dge of ruin and discuss the pleasures of the table, or the small doings of their fathers, grandfathers, and great-grandfathers and remoter cousins to the ninth degree, if you encourage them with undue patience."

Pippin: But our whole life for months has been one long meddling in the affairs of Wizards!

Gollum: Yes, yes, and Sam stinks!!

😆 😆 😆

LOL I absolutely cant remember the last quote... which chapter was that?

A true Brit 🙁

Sam stinks was in the BBC production too, when they were in the Dead Marshes or thereabouts.

I always thought of him to have a sense of humour, I mean checks all the "freaky deaky" characters he created....and all of the amusing quotes which are used by the characters