Well- via the magic of roommates (opens fridge), I can offer you hard cider, Guiness, Wheat Ale, Pale Ale, Dopple Bock Lager, A Nice Chianti (that one's my contribution).
Or a Rusty Nail?
On the downside of roomate magic, there's a horridly despoiled rag on the counter, a wadded kleenex, and a forgotten, partially masticated slice of pizza- all blocking access to the microwave. (Swipes onto floor) Ahh, better. Now to re-heat my third cup of Nasty Coffee.