What not to name your dog...
Everybody who has a dog calls him "Rover" or "Boy". I call mine Sex.
Now Sex has been very embarrassing for me.
When I went to City Hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk I would like to have a license for Sex. He said, "I'd like to have one too." Then I said "But this is a dog!" He said he didn't care what she looked like. Then I said "But you dont understand. I've had Sex since I was nine years old". He said I must have been quite a kid.
When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the motel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me and a special room for Sex. He said every room in the place was for sex. I said "You don't understand. Sex keeps me awake at night!" The clerk said "Me too".
One day I entered Sex in a contest, but before the competition began the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing there looking around. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me I should have sold my own tickets. "But you don't understand" I said "I had hoped to have Sex on TV" He called me a show off.
When my wife and I seperated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said "Your Honour, I had Sex before I was married" The judge said "Me too". Then I told him that after I was married, Sex left me. He said "Me too."
Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A police officer came over to me and asked "What are you doing in this alley at 4:00 in the morning?" I said "I'm looking for Sex!"
My case comes up on Friday...