House of Wax - the words 'hammy', 'slash' and 'hilton' are in my review...
House of Wax operates with two central conceits: 1) if you bore an audience for long enough, they’ll be grateful for even a second-rate scare and 2) EVERYONE wants to see Paris Hilton die.
What surprised me most about this attractive-kids-take-wrong-turn-and-meet-gruesome-end movie was the cinematography. It’s commendably accomplished. It doesn’t fully grasp Switchblade Romance’s stylishly dark palette, or The Machinist’s distinctly Hitchcockian angularity, but it does have an unexpected dash of both. And like those two films, it unashamedly pays its respects to the genre in which it operates.
House of Wax is a remake of the 1953 Vincent Price chiller of the same name. Despite the film’s slash and burn approach to its source material, it cannot help but feel like homage to something better. Indeed when the kids find themselves in the very spooky and eerily empty town of Ambrose, ‘What Ever Happened to Baby Jane?’ is playing at the abandoned town cinema. And the ending has more than a passing resemblance to the ending of ‘Poltergeist’. In fact the whole affair is very ‘Texas Chainsaw Massacre’. During one of the film’s many lulls I would actively encourage you to play guess the reference – it is clinically proven to prevent brain rot.
Speaking of brain rot…Paris Hilton. Hammy doesn’t even come close to describing her acting. In fact ‘acting’ doesn’t even come close to describing her acting. Her ‘method’ is a curious mixture of puppy-in-pain-expressions and mechanical line delivery. But hey, what did you expect? Nuanced acting and intricate plotting will not be found in the House of Wax.
Despite failing in most other areas, first time director Juame Collet-Serra does successfully orchestrate a powerful opening sequence. Dark, intriguing and unflinchingly cruel, it seems a shame that the film should forget how compelling those themes could be. That they are so skilfully conveyed in such a brief scene merely highlights how mediocre the remaining 112 minutes are.
Perhaps producer Joel Silver came to this conclusion in the film’s final act, when he pulls out all the stops and throws in all the cash for a big budget CGI-tastic fiery hell. This would be much more suited to a Jerry Bruckheimer action-adventure, or Silver’s other CGI-bonanza The Matrix. And as if that isn’t heady enough, House of Wax then presents a plot reveal which would be entirely unnecessary if it didn’t carry with it the threat of a sequel. Now that IS a scary thought.