Based on true events - Yesterday to be exact
Me]The reason I called before was to tell you that I might be moving to Northampton in April.
Him] why?
[explained why]
[pause]
him ] oh.
Me] Is that all?
Him] Well, If you leave we have to break up.
[pause]
Me] why?
Him] cause long distance relationships don't work.
me] don't work for you?
him] don't work in general. My last girlfriend cheated on me. I only saw her once a fortnight for 2 days.
Me] so you think I'm going to cheat on you ?
Him] Yes. She did.
me] but your ex is a slag. and why would you get into a relationship knowing that you would only see her under those conditions.
Him] I thought we would make it.
me] so because of what she did to you I'm going to be punished?
him] No. All I'm saying is , if you move we have to end. the distance is too far and expensive.
me] we don't exactly live next door to each other now and it cost more just to go inot London, but you insist that we do that every week!
him] no...we do.....
me] so your just giving up?
him]no I'm not
me] err..yes you are. You think I'm a **** and that I'm going to jump every Tom Richard and Harry that passes before my eyes? Is that what you think of me? Do you look at me and see your ex? Is that it? Do I remind you of her?
him] Why are you doing this?
me] why am I doing what?
him] You frustrate me soo much..
me] Yep.
[pause]
me]You can go now.
him] you called me.
me] Fine I'll call Ross, he wouldn't leave me...oh and Simon...oh and James I still have his number..
him] Enjoy.
me] I will. You wont.
[Pause]
him] Liv....
me] Whatever..Loser.
[At this point I hung up]