Character Ownage

Started by xJLxKing5,121 pages

"I'm Darksaint85, you need to get to the hospital fast buddy! I have no idea what I'm doing!"

"Get the **** out of my Ford Focus you lunatic!"

Lmao.

Originally posted by One Big Mob
If only we were all so lucky as to be compared to the one who drew the greatest ire from The Fallen Carved One.

Once Carver had a different name... was it Rick? Who can tell, it has been so long. But like the great Lucifer he fell and in his descent he found a Green Light. It was different than the light he once knew - different but yet no less, mayhaps even more. To get back to his lofty status he knew he had to change, and what a change he endured! Every Saturday night he now has to clip the sides of his fingernails to make the middle sharp. 10 little knives each ready to carve into ths flesh of his enemies. Only a name befitting of his new fingernails would do. Carver10.

But such a name canst stand whenst one loses a number. In a brutal Jack Russel fight that started and ended with an unsuspecting kick, Carver had lost a thumb.
As he sat there looking into the void left by the canine, he pondered his existence:

"What is this... hole? Is this where we all come from? Is this where you went Father? Is this you Father? Answer me Father. FATHER!"

A kind asian medic picked him up to bring him to the healing house in his iron horse. He tried to speak to the wounded warrior who was deep in thought. However it was Carver who spoke to him:

"What is your name medic? The great Carver10 demands it!"
"I'm Darksaint85, you need to get to the hospital fast buddy! I have no idea what I'm doing!"
...
"Raaargh!"

As Carver suddenly started screaming and spraying blood all over the inside of the carriage.

"Take this blood Gamma God and give me your strength. Take my blood, TAKE IT ALL!"
"Get the **** out of my Ford Focus you lunatic!"

Carver had realized he only lost because his name was a lie. His fingers were not enough to fuel his name anymore. He had to change it with ancient runes to make sure he was getting full power. He had to become Carver... 9.

As soon as his ritual was complete, a green flash appeared before him.
The Green Light spoke to him and told him of destiny. To return to his status as "perhaps Rick", he had to slay Darksaint. Not just for revenge anymore, but for destiny and perhaps the fate of the universe.

And thus a great rivarly was born. Where Carver10 had been defeated by Darksaint, Carver9 would send him to the depths of Hel. Not only for himself anymore, but for Gamma. The Great Defender of the (Green) Light vs patron Saint of the Dark. A conflict as old as time itself.

---

I hope I summed up why being compared to Darksaint is important in this abridged account of history. I'd tell the prequel of this origin story to detail why he fell, but this is not the thread for context.

srug

A true wordsmith.

It both amuses and worries me that the big plan was to teleport the Celestials into the sun. I want it to happen though to get it over with and I am very unsure of what Aaron will do with it.

Yeah, I lol'd.

Also, Jane still has thunder running through her veins. So beware

Originally posted by Philosophía
Yeah, I lol'd.

Also, Jane still has thunder running through her veins. So beware

I imagine it will be like this except ignore the top and bottom scan

https://imgur.com/MnsFTl4
https://imgur.com/aKVQF2N
https://imgur.com/ntAREOU
https://imgur.com/5hmzHrC
https://imgur.com/eIvV5rp

The Thor girls pretty much confirmed she's going to do more Thor stuff.

Aaron...

Brainiac has the tech to shrink not only cities but entire planets.

Vril Dox is back!

Wait, for real? Scans? Throw the Celestials into the Sun? The first issue had their teleportation signature alone far beyond multiple Supernovas.

Sigh, I had SJWs. So stubborn, and when presented with logical arguments, they only dig in deeper. Watch, Thor will dive through a Big Bang but still be scared to go into a Sun now because *cue angry twitter response".

Luckily they were stopped before it happened. Next issue they might go boom in the sun though.

https://imgur.com/Wwm5Cd2
https://imgur.com/RfviWui
https://imgur.com/521SvEy
https://imgur.com/KahJUqC

Not sure how I feel about the new Marc Slayton.

Why is Loki evil again all of a sudden? I hope this is some type of trick. And their big plan teleporting them into the Sun is retarded AF.

I also realized that without an amazing artist, JA really is terrible beyond stomaching.

She-Hulk is not Hulk. Why doesn't Aaron understand names and titles?

Originally posted by One Big Mob
It both amuses and worries me that the big plan was to teleport the Celestials into the sun. I want it to happen though to get it over with and I am very unsure of what Aaron will do with it.

Well Hickman had Sol's anvil blow voltron celestial apart.

Aaron is on to something.

Sol's anvil weaponized the energy of the Sun. That's fine.

It's like arguing Imperiex is weak sauce, because Superman, after a few moments in the Sun, pushed War World, and he's power is a small iota of the Sun's energy.

😂

Sarcasm my dear boy.

"Those Celestials make me look like a gnat in comparison, better teleport them into a star!"

https://m.imgur.com/a/VmApN

https://imgur.com/S2CaUHp
https://imgur.com/ev5QAlJ
https://imgur.com/rZ8JXXu
https://imgur.com/oD8JwDI
https://imgur.com/1hBybAh

Great issue.

Lol.

Imagine JA writing Sentry.

On one hand, it makes Mangog and Mjolnir look a lot less unimpressive because now he's spreading his idiocy across multiple comics, making it a relatively comparable showing. On the other, it makes no sense. The energy signature of their teleportation was multiple supernovas.

Looks like they're shaping up Aaron to be their new Bendis.

It hasn't happened yet though. Just the threat of it alone is funny considering the jokes before hand.

It would be hilarious if he finished every arc here on out by the sun though. Eternity goes mad and gets teleported into the sun.

Originally posted by One Big Mob
Looks like they're shaping up Aaron to be their new Bendis.

It hasn't happened yet though. Just the threat of it alone is funny considering the jokes before hand.

It would be hilarious if he finished every arc here on out by the sun though. Eternity goes mad and gets teleported into the sun.

No bullshit, I'd like it if everybody but the big cosmic beings died inside the sun. Both Marvel and DC.

As in, Thor, Wonder Woman, Captain Marvel, Hulk...everybody. If it wouldn't amp him, Superman, too. All to get vaporized almost instantly. And then somebody like Galactus can come, and just pass through it.

I'd have Black Holes kill everybody, too, including most cosmic beings as well.

It's gotten too ridiculous and looney tunes.

Agreed. Nothing short of Galactus should be able to lay in the sun. Anything else should be vaporized, instantly... especially Black holes. As of now, not surviving the sun and being a Herald plus, it's considered a low showing.